Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

“I’ve got nothing to lose.” This is a thing people say. It’s something I’ve said, I think, although I do not remember when or in what context I may have said it. I suppose it’s true, at times. What have you got to lose in accepting an okay job when you need one, even when […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Britt - You say this is silly but it’s pretty deep really with wondering about what there really is to lose. Have you heard of the butterfly effect? It’s like that a little. Or traveling to the future or something. You don’t know what you’d miss or change. I really like it and thinking about it a lot.April 21, 2017 – 8:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, thanks, Britt. I have heard of the butterfly effect and you’re right – it’s like traveling to the future or something. I don’t know what it’d change but I like thinking about it, too. April 21, 2017 – 9:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Jen - you so made me think about this one. Thanks.April 21, 2017 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - Oh my God…you’re writing a novel? So exciting to hear this. What is it about, or are you keeping that to yourself? I don’t believe I’ve heard you mention it before, until now.

    As a writer, as I’m now experiencing, I’ve got nothing to loose…just as long as I don’t let any obstacles that are placed in my path destroy my creative and future dreams. How’s that?

    Thanks for these deep tax time thoughts Kristi.April 22, 2017 – 6:44 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Kerry! Yes, I did Nanowrimo two years ago and only got to about 6,000 words because I thought I couldn’t continue without knowing how it’s going to end but I’ve gotten back into it recently and am having fun seeing where each decision that each character makes will take it. I still don’t know how to end it but I think I now know the point of it – it’s got to do with feeling isolated within our communities even as we make tentative connections. There’s friendship but each person has a lot of behind-the-scenes stuff that they keep private and they don’t realize how much they have in common. It’s probably closest to women’s fiction right now but I’m still working on it. I haven’t really mentioned it much because I start and stop so much with it… Anyway. Hopefully more to talk about soon-ish. Not letting obstacles in your path destroy your creative or future dreams sounds perfect to me. Here’s to us both doing that! April 22, 2017 – 8:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa@TheGoldenSpoons - It is funny how parenthood gives you a whole new perspective about death, isn’t it? I recently found about about an acquaintance of mine who is about my age and has two young sons – she was just diagnosed with stage 4 cancer. That sends shock waves and really makes you think hard about making the most of every single moment we have.April 24, 2017 – 10:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh wow, I’m so sorry about the woman you know diagnosed with stage 4. That’s awful, and you’re right that it gives new perspective on everything we do… wow, that’s so sad 🙁 April 24, 2017 – 7:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison G smith - I had no idea you were working on a novel! That’s fabulous! Can’t wait to read it😘.April 24, 2017 – 4:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - Deep thoughts here today. I agree you always have something to lose. The older I get the more I’ve come to believe – really believe – life is about choices. Sure, some are bigger than others – but it’s all Econ 101 – there’s always a trade off to every decision made. What do I have to lose sending in an application for a job? Well, the time it took to do that application for one thing! I could have spent that doing something I deemed more valuable if I didn’t really want that job. Would I trade past memories to live a bit longer? No – your life experience makes you who you are. What do I have to lose in that instance? If we are the culmination of our experiences, then I don’t want to lose a bit of myself. Also, fairly certain fate probably wouldn’t let me cherry pick which parts to cut out in trade for longer life… 😉

    So exciting that you are writing a book! Didn’t know that. Hope it is going well!April 24, 2017 – 8:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey Louise,
      Good points about spending time on a job application if you don’t want that job – what could you have done instead during that time to make what you do want to happen, happen? I agree that life experiences make us who we are – the good ones and the bad ones. Also? Fate is a nasty bugger, huh? Well, hopefully the book will end up as something I feel like I can share and not just hit “delete” to over and over, but either way, something towards writing a book is happening, right?April 24, 2017 – 8:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menooausal Mother - I hate it when I get into these situations where I wonder if by moving forward, did I miss out on something greater if I had just waited for it? But life is too short to put on hold, and I truly do believe in fate. If it was meant t be, it will happen. Most importantly, we need to learn to live without regret.April 24, 2017 – 8:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so agree we need to learn to live without regret, Marcia. I have a 25yo tattoo on my ankle saying that. It’s blurry and faded but still a good reminder. Still, it’s hard to not wonder, right?April 24, 2017 – 9:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Yay to the novel! (Beta reader -ahem!) You’re right; there is always something to lose. But it’s a choice – is what we lose less than what we have the potential to gain? I ask myself that often when I’m trying to make a decision. Almost always, the answer is that the potential is greater than the possible loss.April 25, 2017 – 7:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yes please be a beta reader! Hopefully, I will finish it one of these days. I think you’re right about the potential being greater than the loss…April 26, 2017 – 8:37 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - –I’ve lost so much,
    Yet I’ve also gained so much thru my experiences & pain.
    On the other hand,
    I don’t want to lose one. more. day.
    One. more. moment.
    One. more. second.

    xx

    What is your novel about? Tell me!April 26, 2017 – 6:31 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’ve lost SO MUCH. <3 Here's to not losing a single second. And to love, because that's huge. Bigger than all.
      The novel is about isolation even in suburbia. Mental illness, special needs, people being people and being too private, not sharing, wanting to share... I promise to tell you more as I figure it out. <3April 27, 2017 – 11:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Dhaval - A good article and The click to tweet going to put on my sight . I hope it makes a difference and it will help to make it easier for others to share on that platform, too.

    Thanks.April 28, 2017 – 4:09 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - It’s kind of scary how often your posts seem to come straight out of my own head. I think about death way too much since becoming a parent. Like WAY too much. That’s probably not good. LOL. But I completely understand where you’re coming from.
    I also understand that worry about making choices – what if this choice is smart for now, but not smart later? What if passing up on this job that isn’t great means never finding any? (This hits way too close to home for us right now – I’ll have to catch you up. We need a vidchat or something.) I truly don’t live with regret or what-ifs about the past, but I definitely do worry and what-if about the future. A lot.
    Can’t believe I didn’t get over to read this sooner. April was kind of busy as hell. But I’m glad I did because this definitely hits me where my brain is about a lot of things right now. xoMay 2, 2017 – 11:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - What is it about becoming a mom that makes us think about death?!?! GAH. I want to hear about the job. When can we vidchat or something?? I hope everything’s okay with the job decisions – those are so hard because of all the what if’s? I made what I thought was a good job decision and it was the most awful experience of my life BUT then it turned out maybe good because I quit when I was on maternity leave, got paid for it (because it was that bad and the stupidass CEO knew it) and got to stay home with Tucker for a while. Had I had my previous job, that I LOVED, I probably would have gone back to it and put him in daycare. Which I can’t imagine now. So maybe, with deep breaths, know that even bad and regretful decisions end up being the right ones somehow.May 3, 2017 – 7:53 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Weekend maybe? My best times are after Z. is in bed at night. So after 9?
        And I absolutely do think that even things we think are “bad” or “wrong” choices end up being the right ones. Looking back, I always see that. Doesn’t make it any easier in the present.May 4, 2017 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Should we shoot for tomorrow (Friday) around 9? So right that just because hindsight is clear that it’s not any easier in the present. We’re learning though, I think.May 4, 2017 – 7:01 pmReplyCancel

It’s Spring Break. So, unless you’re on vacation for the week, you’re juggling work, life, kids and bizarre schedules where you hope your kids sleep in but they never do the same way they will on Tuesday, once school resumes. Here, we were able to take a couple of days and head to Tennessee, where my […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Lisa@TheGoldenSpoons - Well, I had never heard of Sorbing before, but it sounds like fun. The mirror maze sounds terrifying – I get claustrophobic if I feel like I can’t get out of somewhere. The only other thing I can say is that atlas you went somewhere and did something fun. When you read my post, you’ll see that I spent the week wallowing in self-pity because my oldest was still in school so we did a whole bunch of absolutely nothing!April 14, 2017 – 4:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey Lisa, you guys should go! You’re not that far from Pigeon Forge, right? (I’m directionally challenged so maybe you are further than I realize). The mirror maze was claustrophobic but also very beautiful. I hope your weekend is filled with more fun!April 14, 2017 – 11:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G smith - Looks like y’all had fun! Would you believe we’ve never been to Pigeon Forge, or Dollywood? And it’s really close to Rich’s parents’ place. We need to go.April 14, 2017 – 6:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG you so so have to go. Dollywood is amazing and such fun. Zorbing? All of your kids would love it. You and Rich, too. Or just come back this way so I can see you. That’d work.April 14, 2017 – 11:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I had heard of it. I wouldn’t do very well with it because I am claustrophobic. I would rather do anything involving heights, such as the zip lining I hope to book for June 24th. I also don’t do well in attractions where something might jump out and grab me. Glad you all had fun though.April 14, 2017 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Heights freak me out, totally. I’m glad you’re going to do the zip lining thing and hope you can book it. We’re going to a Cub Scouts camping trip that weekend – hopefully, Tucker will be okay. We’re a little nervous about it for a bunch of reasons… most related to who he is. Anyway, can’t wait to read about your zip lining. This is the Niagara Falls trip right? Or is that now???April 14, 2017 – 11:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Britt - This looks amazing thank you!April 15, 2017 – 12:17 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - I gotta say all those activities looked so fun! And even though I have teens now, they’d love that stuff! You are much braver than me when it comes to zorbing – which I’ve never heard of either — I’ve become so wimpy in my old age! I am wondering how you filmed that – or was there a camera inside the bubble? Anyway, very cool!April 15, 2017 – 9:26 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think your teens would really love zorbing – a lot of the people doing it were adults. I filmed it with a GoPro – it has a hand-held thing and I just held it up to the side. It didn’t work as well in the zig-zag course because I was bouncing around more so it only got the top halves of our heads! The place we went actually gives each ride a GoPro – not sure whether they all do. In hindsight, I should have taken theirs too, and made a cooler video with two perspectives. Oh well, live and learn!April 15, 2017 – 5:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Debi - That all looks like so much fun! I took my girls (with a friend and her girls) to Gatlinburg a couple of years ago, and we missed Pigeon Forge for lack of time. Next time we’ll go for sure and definitely try Zorbing!April 15, 2017 – 1:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh you’ll love Pigeon Forge! We didn’t get into Gatlinburg on this trip – I wonder if it’s still really affected by the fires. I’d heard that a ton of buildings were destroyed… Let me know when you try zorbing – it was a blast!April 15, 2017 – 5:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I have never heard of zorbing but it does look kind of awesome. I’m sure my little daredevil would love it. Me? Maybe not so much. 😀 I’ve heard great stuff about Dollywood – on the list of places to check out at some point. Our Easter break was just kind of quiet. I spent an unreasonable amount of time in church (choir sings 5 days in a row during Holy Week…what was I thinking???) and the rest of the time we just hung out. Yesterday was the best day – quiet, reading, no commitments.April 18, 2017 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Zilla would totally love it! I wasn’t comfortable at all on the zig-zag course but had a blast on the downhill! Dollywood is awesome… Just hanging out sounds good – I feel like we need more of that. I had a dentist appt. this a.m. at 9:30. We usually walk to the bus around 8:35 and today I was like “do you want an extra 1/2 hour?” He said yes, and so we took it. I drove him and he was 5 minutes late. But we had that time and I know we both needed it.April 18, 2017 – 11:36 pmReplyCancel

When you think about your first home, or your hometown, you think about more than just a place. It’s memories, people, and life that happened there. When I was six, I loved my first Ricky. We told each other things we’d never have told our parents or my brothers. He lived next door and was […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Robin - You always make me feel. Great writing!April 7, 2017 – 7:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - BeautifulApril 7, 2017 – 7:27 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re too kind. Thank you.April 7, 2017 – 8:53 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - The Lisa kiss/crush got me. Zilla has a first love and it is just so painfully sweet. How is this happening already? I feel like I say that every day.April 8, 2017 – 12:21 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - I think I might actually say “how is this happening already?” every day for real. Gah. But also awwww to them having first loves.April 8, 2017 – 9:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I remember open insulation too, when we redid our garage and parts of our house. Things were all wooden frame and open to the outside and we loved to play. It wasn’t as good an idea when the new playroom we were putting in downstairs was open to the upstairs/outside/garage and we liked to lean over the open edge. That would have been a bad fall to the cement below. My younger cousin did fall down the hole into my uncle’s new basement once though. He wasn’t too hurt luckily.

    This is a sweet post. Thanks for introducing us to where you became you and where your life and that of your son could go. I will think about my post, though I never have lived away from the home I was born into.April 8, 2017 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow I’m glad your cousin didn’t get too hurt! I think about some of the crazy stuff we used to do in the construction zone that was our house and it’s amazing none of us got hurt worse than we did (I stepped on a nail once but don’t remember other big injuries). Thanks for your sweet comment, Kerry!April 8, 2017 – 9:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Sara - My Woodland Garden - Very interesting blog posts!
    Finish the Sentence Friday is such an inspiring link-up.April 10, 2017 – 2:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Sara – I cannot take credit for starting it but am happy to keep it going now. I hope you’ll join up with us one of these weeks!April 10, 2017 – 9:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G smith - That sucks that no one was home. I did the same with our house on the Cape. Even mailed a letter beforehand, and they weren’t nice. But the folks that own my grandfather’s house, they let me and my four kids in, and let us do whatever we wanted! Big mistake, as Barrett jumped in their pool!April 10, 2017 – 6:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - That’s amazing that the new owners let you guys do whatever and LOL to Barrett jumping in their pool! I’d love that though, you know? If people who used to live where I lived came and their kid jumped in the pool. I think if they were home where I used to live, they would have let us in. Last I heard, our pediatrician’s son (who is also a pediatrician) owns it with his family, so maybe the connection with his dad and the fact that he obviously likes kids (probably) owns it… I’ll have to try again next time. Tucker’s way more interested now than he used to be.April 10, 2017 – 9:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Just J - In my sixty-three years of life there have been thirty-seven residences in eighteen cities, eight states and two countries that I’ve called home, and each one has a story of it’s own.

    I grew up in South Dakota, so that’s where I feel most connected, but I wouldn’t want to live there now, winters are far too long. While I am not crazy about West Texas where we live now, nor is my husband, and we dream of living someplace green again someday, the last sentence of your post says it all… anywhere we are together is home, and that’s where I want to be.April 12, 2017 – 6:06 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, you’ve moved around a LOT! I so understand not loving where you are – I don’t love living here, for a lot of reasons. But, it’s where we are and so it’s home. Thank you so much for your sweet comment.April 12, 2017 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Christine Carter - Now see? This. THIS is why I love your gift of words. Such a gorgeous detailed description of your young years- right down to “crushed Juniper berries between my thumb and finger”… Oh Kristi, you are such an amazing story teller.

    I loved reading this, I love reading more and more about YOU and this rich history you paint through your posts- and the unfolding future you build with your family now. Just BEAUTIFUL.April 15, 2017 – 1:07 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re too kind, Chris! But thank you thank you! xoxo I wish we had a Juniper berry bush here – I bet Tucker would love crushing them between his thumb and finger! xoxoApril 15, 2017 – 5:03 pmReplyCancel

Years ago, a woman told me she’d met her husband online. I was judgmental and horrified. Sure that the two of them must be super-nerds, I wondered why she didn’t meet people in bars or at work like normal folks did. I tried to be relaxed looking, but am pretty sure that rather than displaying a […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • JT Walters - The only person I met was you, your husband and wonderful Tucker.
    But I definetly consider you one of my closest friends. And you are a great friend.

    Love,

    JT😘March 31, 2017 – 8:48 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Oh, how your cartoons make me laugh! And the Metallica t-shirt makes an appearance again — love it!! Yay to computer friends — you are one of my first online buddies. 🙂March 31, 2017 – 9:16 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks, Emily! YAY for Metallica 🙂 and you know what? You were one of my first online buddies too. That was back in the days when Bloppies was like 80 people and really active with sharing (I miss how blogging used to be actually).March 31, 2017 – 5:13 pmReplyCancel

      • Emily Cappo - Yes, I agree – I miss those bloppy days too. Those were the days I was blogging up to 3 times a week sometimes…now I’m lucky if it’s once a month. 🙁 kudos to you for being consistent!!March 31, 2017 – 5:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I never did understand that, but I realize you weren’t alone in having that reaction at the time. I hear horror stories of creeps at bars. I’ve avoided them mostly. Not a great place when you can’t see and then, suddenly, you can’t hardly hear either and are yelling at people to speak up.

    🙂

    I’ve really never met a date anywhere but online, not really. I don’t know what I’d have done if online had never existed.

    Also, I am a nerd, just nerd, but not super nerd.

    🙂

    I’m glad I found your blog Kristi. And you and your lovely writing style.March 31, 2017 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - There are creeps at bars for sure and I’d imagine it’s much harder to deal with them when it’s so loud and you can’t see. Wow to all of your dates online! Anybody serious? I’m a nerd too 🙂 by the way.
      I’m glad I found your blog and you and that we’re computer friends.March 31, 2017 – 6:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - You drew me in my favorite green dress! Yes, I’m pretending that I’m the gal in the top left of that last drawing, because you are my computer friend and my real friend. Even though you drew me with no feet. 😉March 31, 2017 – 10:12 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - YAY for computer friends and hell yes, computer friends are REAL friends! I wrote about computer friends too. We are awesome.;)March 31, 2017 – 12:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - We are so awesome. We probably deserve some whiskey in a jar while riding the lightning. And maybe for Lars to come over and play the drums for us because I could use a pick-me-up today.March 31, 2017 – 6:13 pmReplyCancel

  • April Grant - I met my husband online and the beginning of our relationship, he would fudge the truth and tell people about the first time we met face-to-face. LOL! Now, 14 years later, we’re still good as day one… even better.March 31, 2017 – 5:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - That’s funny, April! I love that he fudged the truth and told people about the face-to-face instead.March 31, 2017 – 6:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - I can honestly say that my online friends are my BEST friends. It was a dream come true when I met many of them at my first blog conference (ERMA 2014). We connected on a deeper level as friends, and I was lucky enough to see them again at ERMA 2016. The connection is real, and my family finally understands that these writers are my tribe. Which, by the way, I would LOVE to meet you at the next ERMA in 2018, Kristi!!March 31, 2017 – 11:31 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’d love to meet you at ERMA too, Marcia! I haven’t tried to go in the past because I don’t really think of myself as a humor writer but honestly, every good book should have some humor in it right? SO now you’ve got me thinking 🙂April 1, 2017 – 5:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - I love the comparison of early Internet to the white van promising candy 🙂 So very true. I remember similar conversations about online dating when it was a “new thing”.

    Now, yes, the Internet is just one more way to connect. I often think how odd blogging would seem if you tried to explain it to someone in the 1980s. “Like a diary, that everyone can read.” or “Like coffee with friends or a community meeting, but you don’t have to leave your house.” It’s an odd shift when I think about it.April 1, 2017 – 10:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It was way scary back then, right? Like for real scary!!! Loving your descriptions of describing blogging in the 80’s because awesome. Especially the not leaving your house part, right? HA! But also spot on!!! It’s definitely odd… it’ll be interesting to see what the history books write about it later, this shift in spying/showing/stalking… weird. I’m not even sure if I think it’s mostly good or bad – it’s both, I think.April 1, 2017 – 11:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I loved your “fat” lady and the barbie looking ladies with the wine. I think I’m finally getting over comparing my blogs success to others who have been around just as long. In the end each of us are unique which makes us individually special.April 1, 2017 – 12:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Exactly and also what is blog’s success? Having to comment on 1,006 blogs every week? Nope, not for me. We’re all awesome, just as we care to be, I think.April 1, 2017 – 11:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ TheGoldenSpoons - Online friends are real, indeed! With my lack of blogging lately, I miss my online friends a oat, too!April 1, 2017 – 8:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I miss you too, Lisa! But yeah, online friends are so real. I’m glad I got to meet you IRL!April 2, 2017 – 5:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Lux G. - I wish I can meet up with some bloggers I’ve known online too. It would be fun. And I understand how you’re feeling. I think it’s human nature.April 5, 2017 – 9:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think you’re right. I hope you can meet the ones you want to most. Maybe a blog conference?April 6, 2017 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Just J - Internet friends are most definitely real friends, and I find that I am far more real with my Internet friends than I am with people I know in “real life” including members of my family. Online is the one place I can be myself and know that someone out there is likely to say “me too”. I can find my tribe, and I have. My husband is used to me referring to one online friend or another in our daily conversations, he knows where they live and what their lives are like, he knows when they are struggling and in need of prayers. I can honestly say that had it not been for my initial group of online blog friends, I wouldn’t have made it through a really dark time to be alive and here commenting today. They were my support system and I try to pay that forward. Oh, and by the way, I met Papa Bear online too, a little over nine years ago, and my “real life” friends were aghast at that, until they met him. He turned out to be the best web-surf results I’ve ever had, no recycle bin needed! 🙂April 12, 2017 – 5:49 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - The whole “me too” thing is HUGE when it comes to internet friends, I think. I guess we just share so much more through writing than we’re able to in gatherings in real life… I turn to this group too, when I need people. It’s really hard to make friends here and I’ve struggled with that a lot. But it’s not hard to make friends online as much, and I’m glad I know you.
      I love love love that you met PPB online too!!!! I didn’t know that. It makes me happy!April 12, 2017 – 11:45 pmReplyCancel

Sometimes, we meet somebody who changes one of our truths.  In a lifetime, we meet many. Some change what we advocate for, live for, and defend. Meeting others changes less significant things inside of us. Each meeting matters though, because meeting and melding and letting in and letting out is evolution. Sometimes, we meet people […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Dana - Oh, that last sentence! So insightful and true. As for being a parent, I think it has made me so much more aware of the fact that everyone has their own truths, and no one’s is better or worse than anyone else’s.March 24, 2017 – 6:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree, Dana! Being a parent really does make us think about other people’s truths.March 26, 2017 – 12:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I liked this post a lot because it’s all so true and meaningful! And the last question you asked –loved it. I do believe that meeting different people changes our truths. I just took a 5-week writing class (writing humorous essays) and one of my classmates was a 75 year-old man. He was fantastic in so many ways – hilarious, great storyteller, polio survivor, widow. For our last assignment, he wrote about his different size legs and feet (caused by polio that he contracted when he was 18 mos old) and I wrote about Little Dude and his illness — we truly understood and gained so much from each other, despite the many year age difference that separates us.March 24, 2017 – 6:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, your experience with that man sounds amazing, as does the writing class. It’s too easy to forget some of what we no longer have to worry about today that people who are still alive did have to deal with, if that makes sense. What a cool meeting. I hope I’ll soon be reading some of what you worked on there!March 26, 2017 – 12:44 pmReplyCancel

      • Kenya G. Johnson - The Seventh Sign. I haven’t seen that movie since “back then”!March 27, 2017 – 9:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Just J - There is so much truth in this post! I spent 19 years working in an agency that provided a full range of services to adults and children with special needs. That experience completely changed the way I view people, I learned far more from them than they ever did from me. And now, when I am out and about, like you I make the effort to extend a bit of conversation and friendship, to connect on the very human thread that binds all of us together. I don’t differentiate between people, we all have special needs, some perhaps more visible, and we all need to know that we belong. It only takes a moment and a smile to make the magic happen.March 25, 2017 – 2:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, your experience working with people with special needs sounds amazing. It’s so true that we learn about ourselves from them. Here’s to connecting to everybody, regardless of what challenges each of us have. I love that you make an effort — that, in itself, is magic happening.March 26, 2017 – 12:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison Barrett Carter - “Meeting my son meant meeting myself.” ❤️ This pretty much sums up parenting for me. I love this, Kristi.March 25, 2017 – 2:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Allison! It really does change us in so many ways. I mean, I knew becoming a mom would change things but I had no idea how much it would change me for the better.March 26, 2017 – 12:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Debi Lewis - You said it all. ALL OF IT. We can never go back to who we were before we got that amazing/awful job, had that child or didn’t, met that partner who was great or awful, looked ourselves in the mirror and marveled at how old we’d gotten. We meet ourselves every day. Kristi, I really enjoyed this post — thank you.March 25, 2017 – 10:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Debi! Ugh to the looking in the mirror and marveling at how old we’ve gotten. I do that a lot these days but you’re right – we do meet ourselves every day. Thank you for the sweet comment!March 26, 2017 – 12:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - Wow, orange slices and drink boxes sounds good, what you experienced and wanted to be for your child.
    But I love this line too:

    I am and will always be Kristi who likes to tell stories, eat nachos, and swim deep in the ocean with fins. There’s so much out there, and in me. In all of us.

    Snow, pumpkins, and bubbles. All fun.

    Thanks, as just one of us with special needs, for being such a fabulous advocate for your son and an example that shows the rest of the world how to be open to meeting all kinds of people.

    Love that you mention Voldemort too. I am just sad there are people so awful in real life, or close enough, but we can learn and do, from a Voldemort and a Harry and everything in between.

    This post does a great job, for anyone who may not have a child of their own, to make the human experience a universal one, one we can all see ourselves in somewhere.March 26, 2017 – 10:41 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you, Kerry!! Isn’t it funny the small things we hang on to that have such good memories? I remember eating orange slices after soccer games as a kid… such a simple treat and we so looked forward to it. And yeah, snow, pumpkins, bubbles. Joy in each. Thank you so much, too, for your kind words about meeting all kinds of people.
      Voldemort sucks. So does the new he-who-must-not-be-named… but we’re each of us a little bit Harry Potter, I think. xoxoMarch 27, 2017 – 8:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - And I’ve become a different Kenya from reading your blog and others like it. I’d hope to be aware and friendly and more open all on my own but I know without a doubt that you’ve made me more comfortable with special needs than I know I would have been without you – and Tuck Tuck and all the others.

    SIde note: I thought of Christopher’s spirit in Heaven with my grandfather until he was actually born. If you’ve ever seen the movie Delivering Milo, it depicts something similar.March 27, 2017 – 2:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ditto, Kenya! One thing I’m deeply grateful to the world of blogging friends is that through writing, it feels as though we can each give our own perspectives, fears, worries, etc. that we might not do sitting on the sidelines of a kid’s sporting event with other parents.
      I love the idea of thinking of baby’s spirits being in Heaven until they’re born. I haven’t seen Delivering Milo but now I want to. There was another movie that talked about that years ago… that all the baby’s souls were waiting in Heaven… I’ll have to think of it. It talked about one of the Bible Stories (The Guff, I think)… and had Demi Moore in it… the world was going to end and she had to say that she’d die for her son to save all of mankind.March 27, 2017 – 8:33 pmReplyCancel

      • Kenya G. Johnson - The Seventh Sign. I haven’t seen that movie since “back then”! Unfortunately “Milo” (Anton Yelchin) died last year so I don’t think I could watch it again now 🙁March 27, 2017 – 9:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison G smith - Having Bear has opened up a whole other world. I too would not take the time to talk to people with disabilities. I go out of my way now to do it. In fact, I sometimes think I freak people out. Ha!March 27, 2017 – 4:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LOL I’ll bet the people you approach are grateful. I sure would have loved to meet you at the bus stop or school or somewhere!March 27, 2017 – 8:34 pmReplyCancel

“Mommy,” he says. I hear hesitation in my son’s voice, and so I hesitate. “Be mindful. Think before answering,” the angel on my shoulder whispers. “Good Gawd, WHAT NOW?” the devil on my other huffs. We haven’t had much school this week, so I patted each on the head and shushed them. We’re each a bit too-housebound […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Echo - Things were so different from my 11 to my son’s 11. Yes, he just turned 11, oh my god!

    He wants and craves different things and yet, I see similarities at the same time. I also see the differences in the way I grew up vs the way he is growing up.

    By 11, I was taking care of myself while my mom, who was a single mom, worked. My son, has me to take care of him and I am lucky enough to be a stay at home mom.March 17, 2017 – 9:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m so glad you get to be there for your 11, too. That’s huge and you’re an awesome mom. One of these days, we’ll have to compare childhood stuff. Because knowing how to ride the lightning is but one thing we have in common.March 17, 2017 – 9:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I wish I could remember what I was doing/saying/feeling when I was 11…I do remember childhood, but have no idea how old I was in certain memories…oh well. And those UTubers – ugh. My middle dude is actually friends with a You Tuber who is local and went to his high school. He now goes to online high school so he can focus on his U Tube “career” — for real! And Little dude watches the U Tube videos all the time. He said to me today he thinks that would be a “dream job.” I spent 20 minutes telling him why I thought it would NOT be a dream job…not sure my message got through!March 17, 2017 – 5:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - The YouTubers thing is CRAZY! The guy we’re seeing in April is DanTDM and it’s like concert ticket prices. Seriously this kid is 25 years old and he’s famous and rich. Because he plays Minecraft on YouTube. GAH. I can’t believe Middle Dude’s friend goes to online high school so he can focus on his career! OMG the world is so different from when I was young. I’ll bet a photo album would totally jog your memory. For me, I have to remember what grade I was in and then I can remember stuff about that particular age, if that makes sense.March 17, 2017 – 9:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G smith - How sad is it that I really don’t recall being 11? I think I’d have to look at a photo album to jog my memory. And I don’t let my kids play the gun games, although I swear, every other parent does. So, I know they do at friends houses, but not mine.March 17, 2017 – 5:58 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Look at an album! I’d love to see 11yo Allie. For me, I think about what grade I was in, and then I can think about what I was doing, who my friends were, etc. The gun games SUCK. I can’t believe how often Tucker sees ads for them in otherwise totally kid-appropriate content. Ugh.March 17, 2017 – 9:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I can’t believe how big a thing YouTube is becoming, and those who’ve discovered how to make a living off of it. Such a change from when we were young.

    That whole scene with your son asking his question is one of those signs of growing up. I am sure you felt that. They want to have more and more experiences that seem premature. I can’t even believe it, in my six-year-old niece. Kids these days. Oh my…I feel so old saying/thinking that.

    I don’t know why guns are such a draw for them though.

    When I was eleven, dating a boy wasn’t even on my radar. I would look at all the girls and boys in my class, those who claimed to be bf/gf and I would think how silly it was, but I had other things, less carefree, on my mind at that age, unfortunately. If things had been different for me, physically and medically, who knows, but I was the shy and quiet girl, so I doubt it.

    Sweet and bittersweet post this week Kristi and thanks for the mention of soda/pop, as a starter topic for what I ended up writing this week. Glad I could join this time.March 18, 2017 – 10:28 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I just read yours and WOW. You did an amazing job of painting what 11 was like for you. Seriously good job (as I said in my comment at your place, too). YouTube – it’s strange how huge it is. I can see how kids think they’ll become YouTubers as a job but to me, I feel like it’s the next “I want to go to Hollywood to become an actor” or whatever… And yeah, we’re old. LOL, we’re not old. I’m oldish and you’re young, and Tucker and your niece and nephew are babies 🙂
      I think about my step mom talking about the older people they know, including her siblings. And she’s right – they were in their 80’s at the time, she and my dad in their 70’s. Old is relative.
      We called it pop in Colorado, too. It’s here that it’s become soda. I still say pop. My son says soda. He hates it either way. I still love it both of the ways.March 18, 2017 – 9:45 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - PS I love how sometimes, the inspiration has nothing to do with the sentence but of a whisper of a memory, like soda/pop.March 18, 2017 – 9:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I had so much freedom at 11 and even younger than that when we lived in an apartment I roamed all over the place. My parents had no idea where I was. I can remember telling Christopher “no” to riding his bike just around the corner from us, a house that I can’t see. And what I was thinking is, I don’t feel like worrying about you being around the corner.

    Christopher has been a youtube fan for quite awhile. I don’t know if I introduced it to him or not, but I regretted him getting into it. Sometimes the things that appear in the sidebar are inappropriate.

    My “no” to guns in video games is now “okaaaaay” as long as it’s not the kind of game where you can shoot somebody and and see blood.

    Sucks that I didn’t make it to FTSF. I know I still have time. But I’m in wine and wind down get ready for the week mode.March 19, 2017 – 8:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know exactly what you mean about not wanting to worry about him being around the corner. Out of site is scary! But yeah, my parents had no idea where we were as kids. None. I’m not sure what’s better – I guess there are reasons (abductions in the 80’s maybe and stories about the windowless vans and poisoned candy…but knowing this also feels like childhood is less innocent today. Maybe it’s not as much about freedom to roam as it is the exposure to YouTube, etc.
      LOL to “wine and wind down” mode! 🙂 I hear you!March 22, 2017 – 11:40 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I have that song stuck in my head now…it drives me crazy. Zilla likes it but I do not. 😀
    I truly couldnt’ come up with a thing for this prompt! But I love yours, always. I’ll get back next week. xoMarch 20, 2017 – 12:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Oh, and the guns on games thing? Yeah. Tough one. We keep that stuff out of her consciousness and she hasn’t asked. Only place that happens is in some game she plays with her dad where they shoot a gun at a wall and it makes a portal open up. But not at people, etc. And she does know of things like bow/arrow etc. from like Lord of the Rings and Heroscape and D&D. But guns hasn’t crept in.March 20, 2017 – 12:37 pmReplyCancel

      • Kristi Campbell - I’m glad guns haven’t crept in for you all yet. It’s hard to know what’s actually innocent and what’s going to be harmful. Like, I always think Minecraft is tame but they have to kill sheep and stuff to survive. Not that tame. Except it’s all pixels? Does that make it better? I don’t know…March 22, 2017 – 11:42 amReplyCancel

        • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I’m so glad to have my Husband the video game king because he always either knows what will be OK or can check it out. Handy, that guy.
          With the sheep, I don’t think that one would worry me. That’s natural – people kill animals for food. If that’s what they’re doing, then that seems reasonable. Except for the sheep!
          I suppose it depends on how it’s presented. Zilla has never gotten into Minecraft so that one we aren’t terribly familiar with.March 22, 2017 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tucker likes that song, too! Ugh!March 22, 2017 – 11:41 amReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - What IS it with kids and that song? I completely don’t get why they like it. Last school year the boys in Z.’s second grade class sang it all the time and bothered the girls with it, apparently. That’s when I first heard it. Zilla said she didn’t like it, but I think it was mostly because she had no idea what they were singing – or just because it’s second grade and girls hate everything the boys do. Guess it grew on her, because now when it’s on the radio, she makes me leave it on.March 22, 2017 – 12:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ memopausal Mother - This made me very nostalgic for my past. Very well written. I honestly believe that YouTube and social media are disrupting the innocence of our children. They see and hear too much nowadays.March 20, 2017 – 9:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Marcia! And yeah, YouTube can so completely be a place to stumble on things we don’t want them to see – I have the settings on max level for PG but still, things creep up in the sidelines. I guess I’m lucky so far that he’s not on social media. Gah.March 22, 2017 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

  • wells fargo login - Excellent blog you have got here.. It’s difficult to find
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    Take care!!March 22, 2017 – 9:17 amReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - —-OMgosh,
    you always make me think and remember and reflect…
    At 11, I was probably on my bunk bed reading Plath
    wondering what the meaning of life was.
    Haaa.
    Love and Kiss from Duluth. xxMarch 23, 2017 – 10:27 pmReplyCancel

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