Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

THEN December 30, 2021, the eve of the final night of the year, another day, another second A blog post titled “What Not to Say Regarding a Loss People Tell You is No Big Deal” was fresh on my keyboard and in my heart. I was writing, processing, and mourning. I was ready to write. […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Lizzi - You still write so damn beautifully. I’m gutted for you about Nugget. I had an inkling when the pics dried up. Poor Tucks. Poor you all. And poor Nugget. Damn 😔August 13, 2022 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - As always, you’re my favorite. Thank you and I’m gutted too. It’s been a while and I’ve been thinking of writing but just well. Could not even say it out loud in my mouth or on this page, you know?
      Poor Tucks for sure. My whole everything is that.August 20, 2022 – 10:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I’m soooo sorry for your loss and just as sorry that I didn’t see that Nugget was missing 😒 I’m so glad Tucker had him for a while especially through one of the hardest and isolating times in our lives. Nugget was there. Much love to you all.August 14, 2022 – 3:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think I made it impossible for anybody to see Nugget was missing. I just couldn’t. Thank you. Reading “Nugget was there” is love in itself. xoAugust 20, 2022 – 10:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Sara - Heart wrenching. I feel this deeply. Sweet Nugget. Love to you & Tux. <3August 14, 2022 – 9:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG thank you. I know you know that I know what you know about the feeling stuff that you know you’re feeling and…. xo mwah.August 20, 2022 – 10:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Julie - Oh sweet Nugget – you all were so lucky to have found each other, such a wonderful friend for Tucker and unique friend to you. And I’m so glad you did write it. We can measure our lives in dogs now, and our friendship in the dogs between us. Sigh, rest in peace sweet Nugget. ❤️🐾August 14, 2022 – 12:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - What a thing, to be able to measure our lives in dogs. I’ll never forget Zonk behind the Papasan and then later Aurthur missing him like cray cray… xoxo for real.August 20, 2022 – 10:07 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - The un-kindest math in the world is that which governs the relationship of our lives with our dogs.
    They give of themselves so effortlessly, so naturally, we are tricked into failing to account for all they give us.

    (Would we have it any other way? Their unconditional love is such a miracle disguised as the ordinary, we should forgive ourselves for forgetting how rare it is in life.)

    And yet, we must account. And it is this inverse proportion of pain, (but really more of an ache that piles all of its future discomfit into the moment) to the joy we have that is the terrible price we pay.

    And, none of us, regret incurring this debt, much as it feels like we do. With time we accept that our animals are a part of us, present or not.August 14, 2022 – 3:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Clark. You kill me and help me soar with these words “the un-kindest math in the world is that which governs the relationship of our lives with our dogs.”
      GAH.
      As you said, we never once regret incurring this debt of the best love ever.August 20, 2022 – 10:09 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - …quick note:
    You are still every bit the bloghop hostinae that you’ve always been. My previous comment, while well-intentioned, is evidence of the atmosphere you engender for participants and your own writing ability which does this thing that whispers to all of us, “Write”

    coolAugust 14, 2022 – 4:50 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Gah.THANK YOU. I very much need for this whisper”write” to carry me again. I miss all of this.August 20, 2022 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Ohhh Kristi I am so so sorry for you and your family…what a heartbreaking loss of sweet Nugget. We had to say goodbye to our sweet Matilda this past June and we are still grieving and missing her everyday. So I get it — I really do. xoxoAugust 14, 2022 – 6:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Gah Emily,
      So sorry about Matilda. I saw the FB, and it’s so dang gutting. Hard to take. Also, did I see you took a chance on a new fluff?August 20, 2022 – 10:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Ohh.. Nugget! I didn’t know! I’m so sorry. We’ve all been so out of sorts, but I’m thankful for FTSF this week. We’ve all had so much to say. The loss of an loved animal is at times as bad or worse as the loss of a loved human. I once read that it hurts as much, but not for as long. I have experienced that personally but it’s different for all.
    Dogs are just.. they’re everything. I miss her for you.August 15, 2022 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - To be fair, nobody knew. I said nothing after putting it out there asking for experiences. Some were positive, and some were heartbreaking. I didn’t know where this was going and instead of asking and sharing, I hid. Until this, I guess.August 20, 2022 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

  • A. J. Goode - Oh, Kristi. Our furbabies come into our lives and take a piece of our hearts with them when they go. I’m so sorry you only got to love Nugget for such a short time.

    Thank you for sharing this. I needed the reminder to give my Rosie a few extra hugs and pets today.August 20, 2022 – 6:08 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - It’s absolutely a real loss, and I understand your reluctance to write about it. We said goodbye to our Bear in April 2020, and I couldn’t post about it anywhere – the circumstances were bad, and well, I’m still grieving over two years later. I’m so sorry Nugget wasn’t with you longer; it’s never long enough, is it? Love coming here and reading your words again. Maybe I’ll join next time. xoxoAugust 21, 2022 – 11:06 amReplyCancel

  • Deborah L Bryner - I’m so sorry, Kristi…it hurts every single time, whether we have lost a dog, cat, gerbil, or goldfish…and each of our animal friends leave a huge hole in our hearts. Sending you many hugs and much love…September 16, 2022 – 6:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Karin - Kristi, It breaks my heart to read this. The time you all had with Nugget was too short, she was a special dog. Losing a pet is more than difficult. In our case, Odin, who could be a royal pain in the butt (as you know!) still holds a special place in my heart, even after all these years. They are all together now at the rainbow bridge playing together ❤️January 1, 2023 – 11:06 amReplyCancel

Two weeks from now, we’ll celebrate the Fourth of July in the US. We’ll ooh and ahh our Independence Day, fireworks, and, in our family, the huge milestone of a first double-digit birthday. It’s hard to believe Tucker’s turning 10 years old this summer, and while all the Fourths of July are my favorite, 10 […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Emily - We are going to Yellowstone too this summer!! We literally just planned the trip…I’ve been to a bunch of national parks, but never that one, so I’m excited! Happy double digits to Tucker and happy July 4th to you all!June 21, 2019 – 7:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh wow! You’ll LOVE Yellowstone. It’s so beautiful and the wildlife is RIGHT THERE. I haven’t been since Tucker’s first birthday, and am super excited. My mom lives in Bozeman, so it’s really convenient and we’ll get to spend time with her too.June 21, 2019 – 7:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Susan O’Hara - We are so looking forward to seeing you all and celebrating the 4th of July and Tucker’s 10th Birthday here at our home in Montana! Can’t wait!June 21, 2019 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

  • Lizzi - The trip sounds absolutely SUPER and I’m sure it’s one Tucker will remember for a long, long time.

    I hope he remembers turning 10. An amazing milestone birthday for an amazing young man 🙂June 22, 2019 – 1:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so hope he remembers this birthday for so so long too. And thank you. He still knows his rooster lady. <3June 22, 2019 – 8:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Yellowstone/Teton is on my TOP list for travel with kids. I’ve done it twice without kids and it’s magic. Oh to take their little cousins! How can they be almost 10? It’s so much to process. Des being 7 is tripping me out.June 22, 2019 – 7:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yellowstone/Teton is amazing and I can’t wait to do this with Tucker!!! OMG they canNOT be almost 10. Seven is crazy for Des, and 10??? With Tucker and Scarlet and Janine’s Emma??? ?NO WAY.June 22, 2019 – 8:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Rebecca - When older people say that childhood goes fast, I now understand what they mean! When your child hits a milestone birthday, you feel such mixed emotions – which I felt while reading your post. I don’t want Brady to turn 10 in November because I’m enjoying him so much at 9. However, he has shown me that he is thriving and growing in many ways so I do want him to age with his peers at school. I just want to protect him forever and I’m assuming it is easier to do so when he’s still so snuggly with me!
    There is nothing more majestic than the Tetons and Yellowstone is just really amazing – geysers like Old Faithful make a lasting impression. I’m so glad you planned such a memorable trip!June 23, 2019 – 7:47 pmReplyCancel

  • yellowstone - Hi, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues.

    When I look at your website in Ie, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has
    some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up!
    Other then that, amazing blog!July 9, 2019 – 9:26 pmReplyCancel

As we sat around the dinner table tonight, I paused and looked at my little boy, who is – in his mind, a big boy – but remains little in mine because being six can’t yet be big. I also see that he’s no longer little-little. As I watched him open the straw for his […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Tamara - I don’t think you stopped looking good ever!
    As for notes in lunches, my mom did it occasionally in high school, I kid you not. I think I needed that inspiration even though I bought lunch a lot.February 25, 2016 – 11:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw you’re the sweetest ever. For real. And yay for notes in lunches in high school!February 26, 2016 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Oh, Kristi I can’t believe that you had nothing just hours before writing this gem of a post. It’s lovely. I’m delighted to learn how well your lad is doing. And yes, I look in the mirror and am shocked by my chin. How did that happen? Lord above. I’m not 36 anymore? Ha! Farrrr from it.
    On another note, I got to hold my niece’s 26 hour-old daughter today. Wow. That was wonderful. I’d forgotten how tiny the feet are. And the ears! And the nose. So cute. So vulnerable. So sturdy.February 25, 2016 – 11:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You are so so kind Kelly! Sometimes, waiting until the last second helps. Often though it doesn’t. I really need to get better about doing these sentence things in advance!
      Awwww to holding your niece’s daughter. 26-hours old? Precious. Did you smell the baby’s head? I miss that smell…February 26, 2016 – 3:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I really hate when you say you have nothing and then spew gorgeousness like this…all the freaking time. 😀
    Oh looking in the mirror and wondering how my mother got there (or some days my grandmother) is something I do often. And I can’t tell you how many days, especially in the last year, I have looked at Zilla and wondered “when did you stop being a baby kid and start being a kid-kid?” She is growing so fast in so many ways and it’s so much fun and so exciting and also so very terrifying.
    My mom used to put lunchbox notes in my lunch. We do it with Zilla, too. And every now and then when I pack a lunch and take it to my Mom, I pop a note in hers, too. 😉
    Well. That all said I have zero on my post for this and I really should get to it.February 26, 2016 – 12:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey Lisa,
      Well thank you thank you thank you! Although, I have to admit that it often doesn’t work to wait until the last minute. I had one recently (last week??) that was kinda a flop because of my procrastination. I’m glad you like this one though – that means a lot to me, thank you.
      I know what you mean about wondering when the baby kid disappeared. Sob. That’s so cool that you put notes in Zilla’s lunches AND your moms! Awesome. I can’t wait to read your Finish the Sentence post. It’ll be fabulous as always.February 26, 2016 – 3:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - Kristi!!!! I adored that picture if you. And I’m a little freaked about the hamster in the freeze!? And wrinkles, oh dear. I stress so much about it. And I’m thinking I might do something, and i feel so vain to be even considering doing anything. I want to age gracefully, but I’m to insecure to do so…February 26, 2016 – 7:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allie Allie! Yeah, I’m a little freaked out about the hamster in the freezer too. It’s been too wet for a proper funeral outside. Maybe this weekend. And yeah, I’ve done a couple of things for the wrinkles and am considering the surgery for real. Vain, I know but UGH. Sigh.February 26, 2016 – 3:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - If you’ve never listened to a blog post out loud you’ve gotta try it. I only do that with a few people who I know what they sound like because I can hear you reading it – not the Siri-ish voice. Anyway walking down the street I laughed out loud a couple times starting with the juice box. You and the Siri-ish voice are funny. I related in the teary eyed fact because I did the same thing with Christopher asking to eat a frozen dinner then following the microwave directions to a tee. (Current age) Lol! Loved this post. Replying on foot with numb thumb and cold hand.February 26, 2016 – 9:38 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’ve been meaning to listen to blog posts but never end up doing it. I need to. I bet I’d like yours out loud. Awww to the teary eyes over Christopher following the directions so well with his micro-meal. How does the time go so so quickly?February 26, 2016 – 3:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - You’ve made me see my wrinkles in a whole new light, so thank you for that, although I do still hate them.:) And, I love how you draw on T’s napkins and have passed that cute tradition down to him – very sweet.February 26, 2016 – 10:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well I still hate my wrinkles too… sigh. I hope T likes the napkin drawings. He never says anything about them. I should ask him if he likes them!February 26, 2016 – 3:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Loved this line: She’s finally old enough to know what she doesn’t know. The older I get the more I realize how little I do know and it was weird the first time I had that revelation. Also, I know you are glad Tucker invited a friend home to see his new pet. When I was his age, apparently I invited most of the kids from my class to come to my birthday party. It wasn’t my birthday. There wasn’t a party. But I wanted there to be a party. The invite didn’t go over well with my mother when about 7 kids stepped off the bus with me.

    I love the napkin drawing idea although I never did it. I wish I would’ve though. I did put notes on occasion in my husbands lunch…but what a grand idea for Tucker (and for you when you were a child).

    Happy Friday Kristi.February 26, 2016 – 12:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda, it really IS a weird feeling to realize how little we actually know. I love that you told a bunch of kids to come for your birthday party when it wasn’t your birthday and there was no party! That’s plain old awesome.
      I don’t think I’d have ever thought to include notes on his napkins if my mom hadn’t done it for me… thanks!February 26, 2016 – 3:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Love this so much!!!! Yes to being old enough to know what we don’t know. And, 15 years ugh! 15 year from now, my oldest will be 28!!!!! When I was 28 I had my second kid. 😳February 26, 2016 – 12:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Lisa! And yeah, knowing what we don’t know is pretty huge I guess. Also GULP to 15 years and your oldest being 28. It’s so hard to imagine, isn’t it?February 26, 2016 – 3:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - This is a sweet and wise post. It must be the greatest thing in the world to watch a child you created grow and learn. I see it in my niece and nephews, but it’s not quite the same I reckon.
    Glad he is doing so well and that he knows to look both ways before crossing a street.
    🙂
    Great prompt this week. Working on mine now, since I missed out on last week.
    🙂February 26, 2016 – 2:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OOH I look forward to reading yours for this week’s prompt, Kerry! I really liked it too. And it really is the greatest thing – watching him grow and learn. Sometimes, I just wish it happened more slowly ya know?February 26, 2016 – 3:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerry - I know. My little nephew starts JK this fall and none of us here can believe that.
    He’s still just so little and it’s almost impossible to imagine him going off to school on the bus every morning and being gone all day. My sister tears up when she has to face that fact, even just a little, and I felt the same when I went with her to drop off some of his registration papers the other day, at the school she and I attended as kids. He was sleeping, in his seat in the back of the car, but I was already picturing school plays and I wanted to run and hide and yet I can’t wait to one day see him in those performances.
    🙂
    So many feelings.February 26, 2016 – 4:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh school plays and recitals and EVERYTHING like that always makes me cry. I’m pretty much a marshmallow. Also marshmallow is spelled weird I think. I always want to type an “e” rather than an “a.” I’ll bet your nephew is adorable.February 26, 2016 – 5:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Mo at Mocadeaux - I vividly remember that feeling of leaving the hospital with your baby thinking “how could these people send me home and trust me to care for this little person?” I was lucky enough to be at my daughter’s when she took her baby home from the hospital. I was able to reassure her that everything was going to be ok. “You’ve got this.” And she does.February 26, 2016 – 6:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s terrifying and exhilarating leaving the hospital. So surreal. I’m so glad that you got to be there when your daughter took her baby home. Love it.February 27, 2016 – 1:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicki - This is one of the most exquisite things I’ve ever read! I so love the time shifts between you and Tucker and then and now. So evocative. The dead hamster, the new guinea pig, the wrinkle cream (have you found a good one? I’m searching too!), and that pic of you oh! Heart squeezes. <3February 27, 2016 – 1:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Nix! I just saw you linked up. Can’t wait to read it. This post is an editor’s pick on Discover from WordPress today! I’m so excited!
      Regarding eye creams, I use this Pro Heal vitamin C oil, Dermalogica’s skin smoothing cream and this Youth thing. I don’t know that they work though. I have wrinkles. But I’m old, too… so there’s that. Gah.February 27, 2016 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Your last graphic says it all. Better here and with wrinkles than not here.

    But if you find a great eye cream, please share it with me.February 27, 2016 – 1:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Maya - As I tell my mother and remind myself in the mirror everyday, cherish every wrinkle, you worked very, very hard for them. They show how you endured and still survived to grow stronger and wiser. They make you more beautiful to those that can see past the first layer.February 27, 2016 – 5:06 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I like that idea Maya – that we worked very very hard for each wrinkle. Here’s to the true beauty beneath the first layer. Thank you.February 28, 2016 – 5:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Steve Auguste - I appreciate your genuineness and your word “himness”! I also enjoy how precious you make your son! I feel the same way about my son who’s 3 years old. I call him “Grandpa” because he acts like an old man. He usually gets undressed (takes off socks and shoes) as he sits at the back of his school bus. He’s working on putting the straw into the juice container though.February 28, 2016 – 12:01 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Steve! How cute that you call your son Grandpa! And the straw into the juice box thing? It’ll happen. Really. 🙂February 28, 2016 – 5:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Eve - I loved this post, you could have written what I am often thinking. So beautifully written.February 28, 2016 – 9:47 amReplyCancel

  • Nathan - Absolutely love this post. Hits home and rings true!February 28, 2016 – 4:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb - Wow, I cried and cried over this post. Beautiful.February 29, 2016 – 10:43 amReplyCancel

  • Karna Tecla - Hold fast to those little memories and moments because they happen way too fast. My boys are going to be 30 and 32 this year. When we moved last year, I didn’t have time to go through the boxes of collected “important” stuff from their childhood: I think I saved every project and paper they did. I held my mother’s belief that they might want to go through the stuff at some point in their lives, and that it should be their responsibility to throw what they didn’t want away. I am finding that it doesn’t work that way. I took a picture of the “Lego” shield that I created to go on one of his Halloween costumes when he was a kid. I texted him a picture and asked him if he wanted it. I was taken aback when his response was “NO!”

    My response is to photograph the “important” stuff and make a digital photo album for each of them.February 29, 2016 – 12:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh no! He didn’t want the Lego shield? Boys. I love the idea of taking photos of all the important stuff and making a digital album. I take photos of my son’s school projects too (the ones that I can stand to toss that is!).March 1, 2016 – 11:11 amReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - Kristy,

    you don’t only write for yourself…
    You write for all humanity.

    xxx kiss from MN.February 29, 2016 – 9:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Laura Emm - I get the way one second you were a six year old girl, and then suddenly your son turned six! My twins start school in September and I feel the excitement for what they’ll become and achieve, conflicting with the fear of the years to come going just as fast as the ones that have gone by in what feels like the blink of an eye. You’ve described perfectly how most of us fellow parents feel about this xMarch 2, 2016 – 1:50 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Laura,
    Oh the time, it goes so so fast, right? Here’s to your twins ROCKING school, and you rolling with the time and seeing the growth and the moments as they happen (and not grieving them too much).March 3, 2016 – 12:27 amReplyCancel

  • Ellen Faye - Wow. This is the best post 😢 I cried. Our appearance may get old but or hearts will never be. ❤️March 4, 2016 – 3:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thank you thank you!!! It’s so true. Our hearts stay the same, don’t they? A little wiser maybe but still. <3March 24, 2016 – 8:25 pmReplyCancel

Just before drifting off to sleep, my son rolls over to check that I’m still there and grips my hand more tightly in his. I like to think that he’s locking my presence into his dreams. Sometimes, while lying in the dark or playing in the light, I think about all of the things I […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Janine Huldie - Aww, I keep telling myself this too as I don’t want to ever forget this time or what my girls were like either when they grow up, because as crazy as it all is this really is (as Billy Joel sang) “The Time to Remember”.December 18, 2014 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

  • April Grant - I would love to keep my babies babies, but looking at them now, the joy that I see of them growing together. I hope it stays that way.December 18, 2014 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - Amen. Yes to it all! I want it all, but it is so bittersweet. I cannot imagine my children as old, I just can’t it given vertigo:(. And I too hope to be really, really super-duper old. I have to be.December 18, 2014 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Five minutes ago, I hugged my not-so-little but still little boy, and I breathed in deep as if to save that moment. I can’t save it, but I can remember. Love this, Kristi – made me sigh big (in a good way), as your posts often make me do.December 18, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love that you just hugged your not so little but still little boy and breathed him in. THAT. That’s what it is for and thank you so much Dana!December 19, 2014 – 11:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - This post appeared at just the right time for me. I just found out a few hours ago that my across the street neighbor tragically died suddenly (I don’t even know the circumstances). She was in her 60s and had 2 kids as well as 2 grandkids. When things like that happen, it really shakes me up and of course I immediately think of my own kids if something were to happen to me. And when you said this, it really rang true to me: “I want to live long enough so that I feel okay when leaving. I don’t know that there’s ever a time that any parent feels okay leaving this life but I have faith that some of us manage to do so in peace. That we leave knowing that we did enough.” That is a beautiful statement and I truly hope I leave knowing I did enough. I believe my mom died feeling that way and that also gives me peace in return.December 18, 2014 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Emily! I’m so sorry about your neighbor 🙁 and yes to the hoping that we live long enough to know that we did enough. I love love that you feel your mom reached that point I want us to be there. First though we need some boys of ours to grow oldish and have the grandbabies right?December 19, 2014 – 11:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Heidi N. - you always make me cry! thanks for the timely message as we all get so caught up in the holiday craziness, I’m also dealing with a sick Dad who must be thinking all of this himself as he waits on more test results from doctors…I too have a hard time thinking of my special boy as an adult, we always want to do more, get him ready for the real world as best we can, protect him for as long as we can, savor as much as we can. Happy Holidays.December 18, 2014 – 11:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m so sorry that you’re dealing with a sick dad and yeah, thinking of our kids as adults is so so hard…especially when they have needs beyond the typical. Thank you so much for your sweet comment!December 19, 2014 – 11:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - wow. just wow. thank you for getting it, as always. that it is so important to remember the NOW. that we need these memories for when we are cleaning puke, when we are dealing with IEPs or when we worry about the future.December 18, 2014 – 11:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Here’s to the now sweets, even when it seems that it is in the ER??? So sorry about that…December 19, 2014 – 11:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - Beautiful! I’m so glad you tell yourself to remember. I used to do that all the time and still, I can’t always remember, but I try. I like to try to remember the smells, the smiles. But you have even one more thing–the writing. You will have that. Always. Forever. And you’ll be able to come back and reflect and again, remember.December 19, 2014 – 12:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m sure I’ll forget too. I’ve already forgotten some of the baby moments I told myself to remember. But at least wanting to makes it easier to focus on the now and not on the to-do?December 19, 2014 – 11:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Susan Zutautas - What a beautiful post!December 19, 2014 – 5:27 amReplyCancel

  • Vidya Sury - And as usual, your post made me cry! So beautiful, Kristi. It is what every Mother wants in her heart, no? Hugs! Your boy is beautiful. And looks so much like you. Each time I see a parent with a child who looks like him/her, I marvel at the miracle, the joy of creating another human being and nurturing them.

    Your post got me all choked up. Right now, I am already freaking out over the fact that he only has another 4 months left in the school he’s been going to since grade 1. Whether or not he feels sad, I know I’ll miss it. ♥ How quickly life goes on!December 19, 2014 – 6:40 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hugs right back, Vidya!!! And thank you!!! You’re so so right about how quickly life goes on. Here’s to the sentiments in your post – the life in the years, not the years of life…. so lovely.December 20, 2014 – 12:48 amReplyCancel

  • Rachael Boley - This is absolutely beautiful!!! Something I think about daily!December 19, 2014 – 9:17 amReplyCancel

  • Shailaja/ The Moving Quill - This was so incredibly beautiful. Can I just say that this is all exactly what I want for my child too? I know that sounds cheesy, but it’s true. What a lovely set of wishes.December 19, 2014 – 9:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thank you so much! And I think it’s beautiful that you want the same for your child. Maybe all mothers do when we think about it…December 20, 2014 – 4:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - For this prompt I briefly mentioned I could have written about how I want to be looking back on my life from an old age. And then I moved on to pie crust. Just TypiKel. But there’s more to it. My sister lost a dear friend two weeks ago to a 5 week battle with cander. She was 68. I learned this week that a good friend of mine is also threatened by it at 64. She’s had a biopsy but hasn’t told me the results and there’s been no word from her family. I’m thinking the news isn’t good. Some of us like Mom reach 92 but the majority of us don’t. Thank you for the reminder to treasure every single day.December 19, 2014 – 10:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Kelly. It’s so so hard….all of it. Your sister’s friend – just 5 weeks? How awful… sigh. My husband’s mom lost her battle to cancer a couple of years ago. She was only 65.December 20, 2014 – 4:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Kim - I love this post and so agree!!
    When my boys were younger I spent many days just hoping to make it through the day instead of treasuring the time. Now that they are teens I try to make the most of every minute because soon they will fly away:(December 19, 2014 – 10:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kim,
      It’s easy to get stuck just hoping to make it through the day. I think that’s why it’s even more important to try to treasure the moments. Believe me there are days when, at 3pm, I wonder how I’m going to get through/fill up the next 5 hours!December 20, 2014 – 4:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - This was absolutely incredible, Kristi! I really like the hand holding through Tucker’s mind before falling asleep. That struck a chord in me as I’ve worked really hard the past 4 months to fill my mind with happy, repetitive thoughts before falling asleep. It’s SO awesome how you are thinking, feeling and envisioning this beautiful tomorrow that both you and Tucker will have! It only gets more beautiful each and every day. I think about getting old too and always hoping and praying I will be in good health with my wits about me. Loved this post 🙂December 19, 2014 – 12:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks Mike! I hope you keep your health and wits as you get old too. I hope I do too. I hope we all do….December 20, 2014 – 4:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Oh this one got me all gushy flash forwarding to knowing my old man son. Wouldn’t that be so cool!

    I love though how you’ve put remembering this moment into perspective. I’m starting to see that “in the blink of an eye” people talk about. 🙁December 19, 2014 – 1:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, I’m starting to see that “blink of an eye” thing too Kenya. Sigh… and here’s to us knowing our old man sons!!December 20, 2014 – 4:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Allison - YES, love love. It is perfect, so perfect. xoDecember 19, 2014 – 1:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - well now you made the entire blog world sob into their sweaters!
    I think of that so often. Every time a whole day goes by and I haven’t been present once. Shame on me.December 19, 2014 – 2:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Shame on me too. I need to read this more as well… to you know, remember this.December 20, 2014 – 4:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele @ A Storybook Life - Kristi, this is such a timely post. It seems like this is the time of year when we’re supposed to be making memories, but it’s so easy to get caught up in the to-do list that the memories themselves fall by the wayside. I hope we are all fortunate enough to know our children’s children, and to be able to tell them stories of when their parents were little. That kind of family storytelling is priceless. (And although I know you’re thinking about how much of Tucker’s story to share here moving forward, the fact that you’ve written down so many memories makes it more likely that you’ll remember them — writing things down ingrains them on your memory in a unique way!)December 19, 2014 – 3:32 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so relate to getting caught up in the to-do’s and not being present!!! I so so so so SO hope to know my grandchildren and that all of us do!!!! Family storytelling is priceless and while I don’t know how much of Tucker to share I so love that you get it and very much appreciate your reminder.December 20, 2014 – 11:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Becky Holland - So beautiful. You make me think of my little man and when he reaches out and touches my cheek to ensure I am still there or opens his eyes, smiles and goes back to sleep. Such precious memories.December 19, 2014 – 8:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Roshni - No words, Kristi!! No words for this beautiful post!!December 19, 2014 – 11:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - I can’t find words to express how insanely gorgeous this is. I know this feeling too well especially as I am watching my youngest son walk that fine line between boy and young man. He still hugs me and tells me he loves me, misses me when we aren’t together but I feel the pull already and I know it’s near time to start letting go just a little. I spend a ridiculous amount of time smelling his hair and feeling the warmth of his hand in mine these days because I want desperately to remember how it feels. Once again, you have written my heart. Thank you.December 20, 2014 – 7:25 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Sandy! Here’s to holding on to the smell of their hair and the warmth of their hands. <3December 21, 2014 – 2:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - I had just kissed my son’s hand after holding it before I read this post. Thanks for the tears! Gather those golden moments and hold them close!December 20, 2014 – 2:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yay for kissing our little boys’ hands, Elizabeth!! It goes so quickly doesn’t it? The time I mean.December 21, 2014 – 2:45 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - ***I want to remind them that breathing the summer’s night air or the crispness of a freezing winter evening while looking at the stars has felt the same since forever and will continue to do so. For all of us. For everyone. Forever.***

    O, my heart. xxDecember 21, 2014 – 4:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay from Trashy Blog - Kristi, I tell myself this so much that sometimes I fear I’m ruining the moment by telling myself to remember it…it reminds me that it won’t always be there, and then that makes me sad. I know that wasn’t the point of your post, haha, but that’s where my mind took me. When my “living in the moment” makes me reflect too much and, in turn, become sad that these moments will pass, I remind myself that other sweet moments are in store for the future, too. And that makes me happy. 🙂December 22, 2014 – 10:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Shay,
      I so get what you’re saying. Sometimes? I even cry when thinking about how much I’ll miss a moment when it’s gone even when it’s happening. Stupid, but yeah. Here’s to the moments remembered and the ones coming up that make us happy <3December 22, 2014 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Nina - As usual, another one that had me holding my breath while I read it. Beautiful, Kristi! I love how you write.

    I do the same with my kids sometimes, especially with the younger twins. I don’t plan to have more kids, so I try to treasure every little thing about them and soak it all up. And I’m one of those people who want to live really really long and old and meet grandkids and who knows great grandkids.December 23, 2014 – 9:42 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Here’s to us living so so long, Nina. So long. It’s almost impossible to imagine NOT telling our grandchildren stories… and thank you.December 30, 2014 – 12:21 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Oh, yeah, Kristi – me too! All of it.
    Happy Christmas to all of you from all of us!December 23, 2014 – 6:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - I’m so glad this piece was picked up. It is beautiful. And Merry Christmas to all of you on the other coast. Unless of course you are celebrating elsewhere. Then find your joy where you are. Love and hugs sent your way.December 24, 2014 – 1:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you Linda! I’m just now catching up from being out of town and al that good stuff – we celebrated in TN with my husband’s family. I hope that you had an amazing Christmas and are having a great New Years Eve!December 31, 2014 – 7:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - So beautifully written, Kristi. I often feel the same way when I look at my children. They’re all grown now, but thankfully I have dozens of photo albums to remind me of all the wonderful times we have had together. It never ceases to amaze me though how fast time seems to pass the older we get.December 28, 2014 – 6:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m so grateful for photo albums and yeah, the time truly does speed by more and more quickly. I hope you’re having a wonderful New Year’s Eve!!December 31, 2014 – 7:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Tracie - This is so very beautiful.January 4, 2015 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Meredith - YES! I want to remember it all too. It’s one of my biggest fears. Forgetting. Beautiful post!January 6, 2015 – 10:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Mine too. Forgetting is so scary. Already, I have forgotten some things…January 7, 2015 – 10:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Daily conundrum can certainly get in the way of spending real quality time if we let it. When I grow old and wrinkly, what shall I remember of my kids’ childhood? Thank you for the reminder. I heart this so much!January 7, 2015 – 7:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so so hope that when I grow old(er) and wrkinkly(er) that i will remember too!!!January 7, 2015 – 10:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Bronwyn Joy - Gorgeous. Thanks for this. Your timing is just right 🙂January 7, 2015 – 7:33 amReplyCancel

  • April G - Such a beautiful post.. I’m not sure that I think I’ll be an awesome parent, but I want to do better. I completely see their struggles, but I certainly know that I need to overcome them. I love just sitting next to them and I hope I’m here for a long time too!January 20, 2015 – 9:10 amReplyCancel

Listen to Your Mother Show videos are out! I just got back from Tucker’s BigHuge Turning FIVE Birthday Extravaganza and Celebration, and discovered that special needs parenting is way better than sea monkeys. The Listen to Your Mother Videos are all over Facebook and Twitter, and I’m swept up in the fun of reliving one […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Mike - I just lost an entire VERY long comment due to me hitting SOME incorrect key (of which I have no idea) and was literally screaming at myself. Please know you are always a beautiful, right and perfect woman, Kristi. Multiply that times infinity the mother that I see you are to Tucker. This last weekend I was inspired to share a dark life secret of mine. What blogger folks have come to know me as on the Internet is this nice, kind person with a cute, very funny and caring Golden Retriever. That is all very true. What many learned, including yourself, was that there always has been and is a much deeper meaning to that relationship. I had a bio mother (whom I do miss terribly) tell me and her university classes that I was the ugliest baby she had ever seen. The next “mother” that entered the life picture did a lifetime a damage that wasn’t until 11 years ago, began to be repaired. That is Phoenix. So, how this relates to YOU….is NOW you understand and know how deeply beyond what you can possibly fathom how much I love and admire the mother you are to Tucker. Why you always hear me comment how right and perfect Tucker is. Because is, always has been, and always will be. His continued success…love he feels, shows and evolves to understand…is a constant testament to YOU!! I could hug you both forever and each day you make our life better. We are so deeply proud of you and you knocked that presentation out of the world!! Thank you, with love, Mike and Phoenix 🙂July 10, 2014 – 4:06 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I hate when I lose comments like that, Mike! Often, I can do control Z (undo) and get it back but UGH. And thank you huge big huge gigantic for your amazing words. I know that there’s a much much deeper (and, sadly, darker and horrid) meaning behind how PDawg saved you and you him and how he’s given you light and hope again, which is really everything. I am in awe of you for sharing in the first place, and, as you know, hope you will write the Our Land, when you’re ready… because fuck. Hard shit, there, dude.
      Thank you for knowing it’s not always easy, and thank you for seeing all of the hugest potentials in Tucker. He’s an AMAZING kid, but he does have his (big huge) issues. Yesterday, his sitter was really bummed because she took him to a bounce house place and he punched (OMG how does he even know this) another kid who shoved him (first so better but STILL).
      You and Phoenix make us better. Your dedication to showing him new things and life and helping him kick cancer’s ugly ass, well. We adore you.July 10, 2014 – 9:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Robin - I haven’t seen the video yet but will. But your words are so beautiful. I think about this a lot–wondering if my worries about my son’s quirky development, and his success in the future are comparable to what a “typical” child’s mothers worries are. There are always some mom’s who look like they have it easy, and some who look, like you said, to have been dealt with more challenges. But looks, especially on social media, can be deceiving–all kids and relationships within families are complicated. Love your ending, about your sweet son, and how much he loves you for who you are, that’s pretty darn perfect in my book!July 10, 2014 – 6:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you huge, Robin. I think about it a lot, too. I wonder about the different worries but the bottom line is that we all worry huge, and maybe, sometimes, it’s just about different things. I have to hang onto the hope that we’re so much more alike than different – us mamas.
      I try to not dislike the moms who look like everything is so easy but gah. Social media is SO fake!!! I mean, I don’t post pics of me where I look more than usually-ugly, ya know?
      And aww! I think it’s pretty darn perfect, too, that he just loves me. Here’s to that for all of us and for everybody.July 10, 2014 – 9:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele @ A Storybook Life - OK, “didn’t fart loudly enough for anyone to hear it” got me from the start! Your piece was beautiful and reflective and I am so glad to have shared the stage with you, and to have learned so much from you already.July 10, 2014 – 8:35 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Michele, I’m so so happy to have shared the stage with YOU, my sweet, lovely new friend. You were amazing, and brilliant and so so brave. And I’m so big huge happy for you and can’t wait to give your new baby belly a rub if you’ll let me. And thank you.July 10, 2014 – 11:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - So you did fart, right? Just not loudly enough? haha!
    I watched this this morning, actually. Yours drew tears from me. So did Kim Morand’s. Tears, I tell you!July 10, 2014 – 10:55 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Nah, I didn’t fart at all, but I might have, and nobody would have heard it because I was fartless, and poopless, and well, weird, right? And yeah, Kim’s was most excellent. Big huge excellent.July 10, 2014 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Lori Lavender Luz - Brava!

    I’m so proud to know you. And I think you’re as beautiful today as ever.July 10, 2014 – 11:22 amReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - love, love, love this. You say the most perfect things to touch my heart. I wish I could say them as well as you. Thanks.July 10, 2014 – 1:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda, you do say them. You say them all just perfectly perfect and thank you. I hope you’re having an amazing time in AK!!July 11, 2014 – 12:01 amReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Thanks, Beautiful. I am sitting in a public library trying, failing, to not cry. This is really amazing, so perfectly saying what I have felt, the whole continuum of fear, sadness, joy, gratitude. I have gone from sadly watching other kids at his school and *seeing* what is missing in him, to seeing what he has that none of those other children will ever have. What a roller coaster!
    Your post is beautiful tribute to the hands-in-the-air ride!July 10, 2014 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Elizabeth, I know I know – and I know that you know. The fear, sadness, joy and overwhelming gratitude are overwhelming at their best and crippling at times, too. I know you get about seeing what’s missing, and yeah, a roller coaster for sure. Here’s to riding thislife with our arms mostly in the air – I love that. Thank you.July 11, 2014 – 12:21 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Just watched…you were AWESOME as was that post. I have always had a big fear of public speaking and even though I sort of overcame it when I was in the workforce and had to give presentations, I still avoid it as much as possible. I’ve never read anything of mine out loud to an audience, other than one time when I took a writing pitch conference, where we had to read our pitches to the class. I really admire you doing this and one day maybe I’ll be courageous enough to give it a try.:)July 10, 2014 – 4:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily,
      You would not believe how badly my hands were shaking – not only then, but in the readthrough, the audition, all of it. It was a little horrifying actually but I’m so glad I did it. I kept thinking that by the show, I’d lose weight, do something about wrinkles, etc, but when it came time to do it, it was just amazing. I would never think I’d have done it, but am so so glad I did. Please think about it for next year. you will be amazing. you ARE amazing. And, thank you, huge, for the support and sweet comment. xoJuly 11, 2014 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

  • Angela McKeown Momopolize - I’m so happy the videos are available not since I couldn’t make it to the show! You did such a wonderful job!!!!July 10, 2014 – 6:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks big huge, Angela. It was hard and also so awesome. I hope you can do it next year – your stories are so amazing.July 11, 2014 – 12:25 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - You were awesome and that piece was amazing! Brought tears and smiles!July 10, 2014 – 9:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - XO Lisa. And thank you huge. I hope next year that your schedule is better when it’s time b/c you are sure to be better than amazing.July 11, 2014 – 12:30 amReplyCancel

  • marcia @ Menopausal Mother - Oh Kristi, you did it to me again–made me all mushy and teary-eyed! This is painfully beautiful. And you totally rocked it at LTYM–you have great stage presence! XOJuly 11, 2014 – 1:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - You are awesome. That’s all. 🙂July 11, 2014 – 3:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Roy - Just beautiful Kristi. So well done and so well read. I remember when you read it to us during the video chat then night before your audition. Even more wonderful watching you read it.July 11, 2014 – 9:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, Linda. I love this comment, and it feels so so long ago when I practiced for you guys. Thanks for listening and encouraging me to do it. I really wanted to chicken out, except I didn’t want to chicken out and really really appreciated your support (and can I say “really” any more times in a comment reply?).July 13, 2014 – 11:34 pmReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - So beautiful and amazing Kristi. Your honesty and your words left me in tears. I am so proud that you shared this incredible message with the world. All who read or heard it are better for it. :)-AshleyJuly 12, 2014 – 10:30 amReplyCancel

  • zoe - wow, kristi! EVEN better than the practice on vid chat and I got all teary on that one!!!!! Lovely, simply lovely, zoeJuly 12, 2014 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YAY for tears because that means I’m less of a freak for having them every time I even think about doing this OUT LOUD, on purpose. and yeah. thank you. big. xoxoxJuly 13, 2014 – 11:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Laurie Hollman, Ph.D.at Parental Intelligence - It’s so great for all the viewers that you were on that show. Your words are so important for other parents to hear. How your emotions grew and grew and how in love you are with being your child’s mother, the mother you have become.July 13, 2014 – 3:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Laurie. I will always be in love with being my kid’s mom, but it’s true that before I had him, I was not sure about being able to love him. If even one person sees that and knows that it’s still fun and amazing? Then the time spent on SM is worth it. Thanks so much.July 13, 2014 – 11:49 pmReplyCancel

  • My Inner Chick - **You’ll refrain from falling to your knees because your son is watching you.***

    This line truly got to me.

    Fabulous, powerful video.

    Thank you for sharing your heart w/ honesty, love, humor, rawness, and insight.July 13, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love that you loved that line and that it got to you. I so clearly remember being at the doctor’s office (and at early intervention AND when the teachers came to our home) and almost almost almost falling, but looking over at my boy, and knowing he was looking at me, and saying “Ok. What should we do?” instead. It was a big moment, and continues to be one… so I thank you huge for commenting on it and recognizing its import.July 13, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Nathaniel Kidd - Your words are so profound and powerful. I enjoyed the video. You have a way of connecting with your audience. Your message is powerful and empowering. Thanks for sharing.July 14, 2014 – 2:45 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you very much, Nathaniel! I appreciate the kind words and the visit.July 14, 2014 – 6:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Just saw the video today Kristi and oh my heart, I’m trying not to cry. Just beautiful! And the fact that you are such an inspiration to many makes you more special! Hugs to Tucker!July 15, 2014 – 3:41 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - I totally would have farted or croaked while trying to talk. I know it. You are so amazing, Kristi! Just awesome.July 16, 2014 – 12:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Echo, I’ll bet you’d rock LTYM. Is there one in your area? You should totally try out. You’d be fabulously awesome.July 18, 2014 – 5:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Norine of Science of Parenthood - What a beautiful post.July 16, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - I just got a chance to see this today Kristi and wow, you did so well! Your words at powerful and you spoke so well too. Like most other people have written, I almost cried. (And it was great to see you and hear you talk.)July 16, 2014 – 12:50 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks big huge, Yvonne. It was such a powerful thing to get on stage and read something I’d written. xoJuly 18, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - omg, your post should come with a tear-jerker warning! was there a dry eye in the house? the lady after you, oh my, i couldn’t make it all the way through her speech! you ladies are the bravest of the brave.

    i’m so happy you wrote and shared this with the world. it was like you had peaked inside my to the deepest, darkest, most hidden places of my soul.

    thankyou!!!!July 22, 2014 – 8:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - well, my eyes weren’t dry… for sure there. Oh and the one you’re talking about after me is my sweet friend Michele Vaughn and she’s awesome. You should listen to her video – after all of that, she’s now pregnant, with a baby girl, and feeling good. Plus, she’s awesome. And yeah, here’s to our dark insides friend xo.July 22, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Steph - You made me cry. That was beautiful.July 22, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - So sweet and so true! I remember how frustrating it was for me that no one would agree with me that something might be wrong. It was so obvious, yet everyone thought that by denying it they were making me feel better! I needed support and answers not denial! Your public speaking is awesome! You’re so brave! Great job Kristi!July 22, 2014 – 12:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Sylvia, I remember those frustrating times when we KNOW we KNOW and people want to be encouraging, and well, they are and they’re not. Because we know… Thank you so much for your amazing lovely comment.July 22, 2014 – 10:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Foxy Wine Pocket - Wow, Kristi, just wow. Your words are so beautiful and powerful. And hearing you speak them was absolutely amazing. xoxoJuly 23, 2014 – 1:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - Thank you for that!!!! It brought tears to my eyes. I just got back from a family vacation that had me feeling exposed. We drove 11 hours for my son to be so sensory overloaded that he could hardly function at times. The feeling of people staring at your child in disapproval when you know your child is struggling more then these people (strangers and family) could ever imagine is heartbreaking. Trying so desperately to find the magical solution to help their little bodies feel okay in environments that most don’t think twice about. When you find the magical combination and your child begins to smile, you know that smile that instantly melts your heart! That smile helps the stares and mumbling disappear and all to feel right in that moment. The pride that you have for your child whom has just overcome more than they should ever have to, is radiating. I may not always like it, but I love being a special needs mom!July 23, 2014 – 2:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Misty, So sorry about the family vacation and feeling exposed. 🙁 That’s so so hard. I hate the feeling of disapproval and yeah, feeling the magical solution is so hard but SO rewarding to get that amazingly awesome smile.
      I love how you said that you may not always like it but love being a special needs mom. YES. <3July 26, 2014 – 2:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Meredith - Kristi this is so beautiful, like I told you before. I can tell you’re exactly the kind of mom your child needs, and that is an amazing, miraculous thing!!September 10, 2014 – 3:32 pmReplyCancel

    • Meredith - And, I hate that I can’t correct my misspelling of you’re. UGH! 🙂September 10, 2014 – 3:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Kathleen O'Donnell - Another beautiful post. It’s difficult to articulate how we feel as mother’s even when our kids are not autistic or don’t have special needs. You do such a beautiful job of finding the beauty in a difficult situation and telling us about it. Bravo.September 11, 2014 – 2:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you thank you Kathleen!!! I know what you mean.. I don’t even know yet what Tucker’s needs will be but. well, thank you@October 19, 2014 – 11:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristina Grum - This was beautiful. Simply beautiful.September 11, 2014 – 8:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Sharon - Hi Kristi I just watched the video of you and it brought tears to my eyes. Finally a mum who gets what it is like to have an autistic child. My son Caleb is 5 years old and he was diagnosed when he was 3. Every thing you said was exactly how I felt, and that family/friends will never quite understand what it is really like. It is a tough road ahead for us mums but it is also filled with lots of wonderful moments too. We are so lucky that our son goes to a main stream school (Catholic). The school has been so amazing in assisting our son and the children and their parents are also amazing. They have welcomed, accepted and loved my son and we feel blessed by this. I look forward to reading all your wonderful stories.
    Kind regards
    SharonSeptember 24, 2014 – 7:07 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Sharon, I’m so sorry that I’m just now seeing this (UGH) really sorry. I love reading that your awesome son Caleb is getting mainstreamed and doing so well. I feel very lucky that Tucker is also mainstreamed right now although I also feel sad about it is that means he’s not getting some of the therapy he might benefit from (that made him talk)… Thank you SO MUCH for coming and commenting. It means the world to me.October 19, 2014 – 11:03 pmReplyCancel

Last night, I was abducted by aliens while I slept.  One minute, I was peacefully slumbering in bed, and the next, I was standing outside, on the sidewalk, looking at two creatures that I knew were from outer space. Whether it was the glass of wine I’d had before bed or that they’d done some […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Janine Huldie - Love how you ended this and think you are right about just being thankful for the here and now, but also have to share I had my ex in high school stolen by my skanky ex-bff right before our senior prom. So, was totally shaking my head on that experience!!April 10, 2014 – 10:06 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Janine. I can’t believe your high school ex was stolen by your skanky ex-bff right before prom!! Ugh.April 12, 2014 – 9:40 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - Only you could make green alien men profound and heartwarming at the same time. I completely agree with you, Kristi – I wouldn’t change my yesterdays. Except for the one I wrote about for FTSF.April 10, 2014 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA to except the one you wrote for FTST Dana but come on – I’m actually jealous of your front door marker! Too funny!April 12, 2014 – 9:41 amReplyCancel

  • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - OK, I’ve set out cookies for Santa and carrots for the Easter Bunny – now I’ve gotta keep beer and Doritos on hand for the little green guys?!? Ummm, just in case … what flavor Doritos was it that they took???April 10, 2014 – 10:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - Aliens are so smart, aren’t they? Did you tell them I said Hello? 😉April 10, 2014 – 10:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Don - Is it wrong that I was reading this and hoping that there’d be some probing? Yes? Okay then, that didn’t happen then, probably.

    Lol. How cool would it be to be our same selves only younger? Awesome is how!!!April 11, 2014 – 12:19 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yes, it’s wrong that you were hoping for some probing, although not exactly surprising. It would be awesome to be our same selves but younger, yes. Very cool. Probingly cool. Ok that didn’t really work as well as it did in my head.April 12, 2014 – 9:50 amReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - sweet! I was with you all the way. Sorry about the missing Doritos and Beer. 🙂April 11, 2014 – 1:31 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle - That was awesome! Love the drawings! If I could turn back time, I’d probably tell my junior high and high school self that things get better and I’d probably not have worked so ridiculously hard for companies that I didn’t own and in the end, didn’t care how much I put into my job. Then again, I probably would, because that’s just how I roll. I care too much sometimes.April 11, 2014 – 2:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know what you mean, Michelle, about working. Before having Tucker, I used to work 70+ hours a week. And I liked it. What’s up with that?? And yeah, telling our junior high and high school selves that things get better would be a great one.April 12, 2014 – 10:00 amReplyCancel

  • Misty - hillarious as always! i’d so love to be your neighbor!April 11, 2014 – 5:53 amReplyCancel

  • Real Life Parenting - Those skanky, boyfriend-stealing bitches are everywhere! lol Funny, I actually started my post (but then completely changed it) with funny stuff I wish I could go back and say or do to past boyfriends. …. You and I had a similar wave-length on this one 🙂

    Loved your little green aliens! And that nosy neighbor? Pretty sure I lived down the street from her as a kid!April 11, 2014 – 7:44 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - How funny that you started with what you’d go back and say or do to ex boyfriends!! HAHA to the nosy neighbor! They’re everywhere!April 12, 2014 – 10:06 amReplyCancel

  • karen - LOVE the creativity babe! you are right, everything is as it shoudl be, one change could effect it all and life could be so terribly different.

    terrible aliens for taking your beer.April 11, 2014 – 8:04 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know Karen. They suck for taking our beer. However, they were quite wise with their advice so maybe some beer and Doritos was a small price to pay.April 12, 2014 – 10:07 amReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Steck - There are some profound quotes in your post that really resonated with me, Kristi. “If there’s something I want to change, I need to look at the tomorrows instead of the yesterdays”. It was so much fun, but filled with incredible insights that I love. I am who I am because of what I’ve gone through. So are you. 🙂April 11, 2014 – 8:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Exactly, Jennifer! We are who we are because of what we’ve been through – the good and the not-so-good…April 12, 2014 – 10:08 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Golden Spoons - Aliens, humor, life lessons, and love all wrapped in to one post – only you, my friend!! I love what you did with this and totally agree – we need to focus on tomorrows, not yesterdays. I have my moments, but, in the end, wouldn’t want anything to change my right now.April 11, 2014 – 8:36 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Lisa! And here’s to focusing on the tomorrows and on deep breaths through the moments 😉April 12, 2014 – 10:08 amReplyCancel

  • Kat - You make a very good point. I’ve been through some shitty things in life but I’ve also had a lot of great things happen too. Getting rid of the crap might mean that the good might go to. Our experiences make us who we are and, for the most part, I pretty much like who I am.

    ps. Any aliens who like Doritos and beer are okay in my book 🙂April 11, 2014 – 9:05 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Exactly, Kat – it’s too scary to get rid of the crap because the good is in there too. Hehe to aliens who like Doritos and beer. At least they have great taste!!April 12, 2014 – 10:10 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - This was so much fun to read and I love the illustrations! I probably would have offered them Doritos too!April 11, 2014 – 9:08 amReplyCancel

  • Twindaddy - I’d love to be 10 years younger too!April 11, 2014 – 9:33 amReplyCancel

  • Tarana - We really are who we are because of every little moment in our lives. Those aliens were right! Even if we were to change the slightest thing about our past, we might turn into completely different people.April 11, 2014 – 9:43 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I like your take on it! I like your Metallica shirt.
    I’d like to come to the playground with you, wearing clean clothes, and being oddly buff, and ignore other moms. Can I?April 11, 2014 – 10:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tamara, I’d LOVE to have you come to the playground with me anytime. Even if you’re not wearing clean clothes 😉April 12, 2014 – 10:26 amReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - I really loved the sentiment here. It’s something I think about often. There are a couple of things I would definitely change but like you I wonder where that would leave me. Thanks for the profound thoughts and funny drawings today!April 11, 2014 – 11:52 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Okay- so did you really have this dream? Or are you that creative and witty and brilliant to come up with this one? SO adorable, funny and as always powerful.

    I can’t stop laughing at your neighbor with the binoculars!!! “Harold!!”- Omygosh HILARIOUS!!!!!

    I love this message- ultimately, every single piece of who we are and how our lives unfold is critical and worthy of keeping.

    Oh yes indeed.April 11, 2014 – 12:03 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, I did not actually have this dream – but I like that you think it was creative and brilliant even. I was just trying to figure out a way to make the concept of going back in time more fun. And haha to the neighbor. xo and thanks so much, my lovely friend!April 12, 2014 – 10:29 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - I’m loving how so far most of the FSTF posts are coming up with the same conclusion – we are today the sum total of our past experiences. So very true. At the same time I am stunned at your revelation about the stock options buyout offer. How could they think anyone would leap at that? Stunning.April 11, 2014 – 12:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kelly – I really like how so many of us decided that we wouldn’t change anything either! And yeah, the stock options thing – sadly, I know people at other companies who did choose to buy theirs and lost their money. Of course, there were always the stories out there about the one guy who invested $5K and made $100K to make us all at least think about it. Glad I didn’t though, I’d still be bitter!April 12, 2014 – 10:35 amReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - There are definitely things I look back on and wish I’d had the wisdom and experience to know then what I know now. But, I’ve come to the same conclusion as you. I don’t think I’d really change a damn thing because every moment, mistake, and decision has led me to where I am today. And I wouldn’t trade my husband, my daughters, my family, or my friends for the world.April 11, 2014 – 12:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Nicole, I’m so with you on not trading anyone in my life for the world – and all of our experiences helped to make us who we are today. Good and bad and in between.April 12, 2014 – 11:12 amReplyCancel

  • Barb Taub - This was so funny. And touching. And is it weird that I identify with the aliens? It reminds me of the way that I know — really know– what’s best for my kids. And we all agree that I know. Only difference is that they don’t come to see my wisdom (as you did with the aliens) and so they go off and do their own thing anyway. And they’re usually right. I guess that makes me the neighbor instead of the aliens.

    Well, crap.April 11, 2014 – 12:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Barb, it’s not weird at all (ok maybe just a little bit but I’m okay with weird) that you identify with the aliens. Was it the Doritos or the beer that helped? 😉
      HAHA to being the neighbor instead of the aliens. I vote that you get to be the aliens instead of the neighbor!April 12, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Well, you know I would love to be 10 years younger. It’s fun to think about (George and I were JUST talking about this last night) but you are right. We are exactly where we are supposed to be. As always, beautiful takeaway and kick-ass drawings, Kristi!April 11, 2014 – 1:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - How weird that you guys were just talking about this, Rachel! And yeah, I do believe we are where we are supposed to be. Exactly where. Old and all.April 12, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

  • That girl ryan - AH! teach me how to draw like this? I love it, especially the aliens, i want to take them home.

    This story could honestly be written in a child’s book. It’s full of morals and good teachings…almost bible like. You could call it, “Ninee’s New Testament”.

    You could probably even take your stock options and use it for publishing. And of course I will be your manager and book you on the Oprah show.

    Yes, this is a great idea, call me when your ready.

    All giggles aside, loved this. The pictures just made it too lol.April 11, 2014 – 2:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Girl Ryan, I’d LOVE to teach you!! And I like the aliens too. I wish they were real, I like them so much. I’d even buy extra beer and Doritos. And I freaking LOVE “Ninee’s New Testament” and thanks for getting me on Oprah. That’ll be awesome fun. Don will be so jealous because we’ll be famous. I’ll get to work on it!April 12, 2014 – 11:17 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Love it when you have illustrations! For a moment I took ten years off my life to be here just as it is but then I realized the last ten years have really been so much more of a learning experience than the first 33! Wow huh? Oh and I would have been so pissed to date the same boy for all of senior year securing him for the prom just to have a skank steal him. So did you get another date?April 11, 2014 – 2:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Kenya! And it’s true that we learn more during the “older” years, isn’t it? What’s up with that? And yeah, that dumb boy sucked for dumping me right before prom. For a skanky freshman too! I didn’t get another date, and missed it out of spite which, in hindsight was sortof dumb…sigh.April 12, 2014 – 3:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Jodi Flaherty - Well Since I just visit Don of All Trades, I think he may have your beer & doritos…..

    Kidding, aside this is an awesome #FTSF Loved your illustrations!April 11, 2014 – 3:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey you’re right! I’ll bet sneaky Don took the beer and Doritos. I knew I heard something when I was outside talking to the aliens. And thanks!April 12, 2014 – 3:43 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - “…it is our experiences that make us who we are. That changing a single one creates a ripple throughout time and space, and that, in the end, it’s simply much too risky to change anything.

    way to Time Travel buzzkill, yo

    lol, but I agree with you (yeah, how like is that?)April 11, 2014 – 3:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Bianca @ Rant Rave Crave - Those are some cute aliens! I know changing the past would affect the future & makes us who we are today. However, I do have to agree with you when you were thinking the playground mamas could suck it. 😉April 11, 2014 – 5:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Love that you get how sucky some of those playground mamas can be. Although, bummer.April 12, 2014 – 3:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzy - Muddle-Headed Mamma - Loving those aliens, Kristi, and Harold’s mum too! You’re such a great artist. Fantastic post – a very good reminder that our tomorrows are more important than our yesterdays 🙂 I’m lucky in that none of the mothers in the playground near where I live are particularly buff or glowing or clean clothed (self included!) xxxApril 11, 2014 – 9:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Lizzy! “Artist” is probably a stretch but they’re fun to do. Glad to hear that the mothers at your playground are normal and messy!! 😀April 12, 2014 – 3:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - It is fun to toss the idea around a little…the thought of changing something in the past? But there’s that whole time/space continuum thing that would change everything else, including the really, really good stuff! I love this and I really love the fact that drawing Kristi is wearing a Metallica tee! XXApril 12, 2014 – 7:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sandy, it IS fun to toss the idea around about changing the past, being younger, and all of that. But you’re right, in the end, it’s just way too scary to change anything. Also? I love that drawing Kristi is wearing Metallica, too 😀April 12, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - You know that game “Draw Something/This”? I should not be allowed to play that game. But you? You’d nail it.
    I completely agree with you in that our experiences shaped us. I do however wish that I could go back in time and call in sick the day that stupid asshole kid who thought it wasn’t cool to use his inhaler at school so he had a massive asthma attack and he stopped breathing and then I picked his fat ass up and then fucked my back up.
    Yup, someone else could be the hero. Not even lying about that.April 13, 2014 – 11:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kim, I used to be completely addicted to Draw Something! I used to take screen shots on my phone of my favorites and save them. I think I got bored with it or something though as I stopped playing like a year ago. Maybe time to get re-addicted because it’s much healthier than that stupid bastard Candy Crush.
      Ugh, I didn’t know that’s how you fucked up your back – I don’t blame you at all for wanting to change that one!April 13, 2014 – 4:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle AKA Dribbles and Grits - I feel the same way. There’s a lot of things in my past I didn’t like and things in my present I don’t like that I could change going back in time, but I’d be afraid I’d mess things up even more. I’m better off being back in time already for the future if that makes sense. If not, try more wine. If that doesn’t work, it probably doesn’t make sense.April 13, 2014 – 5:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yes, it totally makes sense to go back in time already for the future! Mmm wine. Yummy yummy wine.April 14, 2014 – 3:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Mytwicebakedpotato - I wish that I could go back and tell my younger self…
    – you aren’t pretty when you drink too much and throw up by train tracks
    – not everyone will like you and that’s okay
    – it’s okay to be different

    Thank you for this 😉April 13, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Lana - Hi Kristi- I’m so glad I found your site. My sister has a 15 year old on the autism spectrum – I will be forwarding this on to her. I just started blogging and I’m having so much fun finding other moms in blogland. This post made me laugh AND think, which means it was great! Have a great week!April 14, 2014 – 1:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Lana,
      Thanks so much for finding it and for passing it along to your sister. I’m so glad you’re enjoying finding people in blogland – it’s really an amazing thing. I have made so many great friends and really look forward to getting to know you, too! Thanks again!April 14, 2014 – 4:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Meredith - This is so awesome. I love the drawings too!! It’s so true that our life experiences are such an intricate part of who we ultimately are. You probably couldn’t have been the mom to Tucker that you are now if you didn’t have those extra 10 years under your belt either. Although, having a younger body than the other moms at the playground sounds SUPER awesome.September 10, 2014 – 3:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much sweets! Yeah, the younger body sounds amazing… but also? To go back means giving up experiences right? 🙂September 11, 2014 – 1:14 amReplyCancel

  • Jana - “If there’s something I want to change, that I need to look at the tomorrows rather than the yesterdays.” SO true! I need to start doing that myself (although I wouldn’t mind being ten years younger!)September 11, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so would not mind being 10 years younger either, Jana!!! But yeah, sadly, we have to look at the tomorrows and not the yesterdays…October 23, 2014 – 11:20 pmReplyCancel

The word autism entered my heart as a whisper. It later entered my brain as a possibility. Later still, it entered my life. I worried, bought a book on autism, devoured it, and then felt like that must not be what my son has. He was nothing like the boy in the book.  “Maybe,” I […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Emily - I think/hope (?) I helped a little with this when you asked me last night and I’m glad others were able to give you thoughtful answers too. I didn’t realize the post was for today! I love the list, love the writing, and of course can relate in every way.March 6, 2014 – 10:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - But of course you helped, Emily. You always do and you always have. I didn’t realize it’d be for today either so all’s well and good unless you want to add something, in which case I will so add it. I had a vision for this initially that just didn’t work, as the quotes with links well. But tell me if you want me to include something with a link ok?March 6, 2014 – 11:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Aww, Kristi, you said a mouthful here and truly just expressed all the things mothers of kids with autism wish we all knew. I cannot thank you enough for alway seeing so upfront about this and sharing over and over with us. I can’t say enough how much I adore you and your love for your little guy comes through loud and clear over and over. So, huge thank you for being just you and hugs, too!! 🙂March 6, 2014 – 10:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Janine, thank you for you. I appreciate you saying that you appreciate me putting myself out there, because sometimes, it feels really hard to do so. Hugs right back to you, my friend.March 8, 2014 – 12:51 amReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - I was really thinking the other day that I can’t wait to meet him when I come down for BlogU. And you, of course. But I really, really want to meet this extraordinary little boy.March 6, 2014 – 10:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think I’ll have Robert bring him up to BlogU on Sunday when we’re all getting ready to leave because I so want him to meet you – and you him – too. He really is amazing. I mean, well, they all are. Henry is. Still, a chance for you to meet him? Fucking awesome.March 8, 2014 – 12:53 amReplyCancel

  • Kathy at kissing the frog - Oh, I love this, Kristi. I really do. Every child is different, and to lump them in one group just because they have a certain diagnosis is just foolish and harmful. Thank you for putting this out there for other people to consider and understand. xoMarch 6, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - So right Kathy that every child is different, and I still am hoping you’ll write for Our Land!!! Judging anybody on a diagnosis feels cruel and unfair. Thanks, you, for getting it.March 8, 2014 – 12:54 amReplyCancel

  • christine - I will admit that I used to be one of the gawkers. Not on purpose, but because I just didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to do anything wrong.
    I have to say, one of the best things that has come from blogging is getting to read all of the blogs of moms with special needs kids. I no longer stand back and watch. I have finally realized I was an idiot. Special needs kids are kids. Plain and simple. I know kids. I know how to talk to and work with and play with kids. As with any other child, I just need to follow the kid’s lead and all will be fine. So I do.
    Thank you for writing. Thank you for educating us. You (and all the other special needs moms who write) are doing good, helpful things.March 6, 2014 – 11:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - DUDE, you so rock. Yes, kids are kids are kids. And you know what? It’s not that bad to gawk. It’s bad to gawk and not say anything. I mean, ask, you know? Yes, you do know because you ask and TALK. And thank you so huge much for getting it and for trying to understand and well, for being awesome you.March 8, 2014 – 12:56 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Yes, YES! The denial and the acceptance. And the lessons learned. Thank you for publishing this list.March 6, 2014 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - So beautifully said, Kristi. My heart aches and cries and then rises in a certain mom-pride for all mothers everywhere- and for every single child- every one of them. They all- ALL are on purpose.

    And they ALL are loved.March 6, 2014 – 11:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - Kristi, you nailed it again!

    I wish that people knew and realized these things.
    I wish that they saw my boy for who he is and not what he was diagnosed with.
    I wish that everyone could read you post!March 7, 2014 – 1:09 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so wish that everybody saw both of our boys – for our boys. They are NOT their diagnosis. Thanks so much. Although I’m sad that you get wishing people SEE your son, too. May we do what we do to make the world less blind, yeah?March 8, 2014 – 12:59 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - I can not remember who posted it last week but it was about offering a quote – you and Beth were on there, I do remember that. My quote was, “Get educated before passing judgement”…or something close there. My feelings on that quote encompass every spectrum across our lives. And it included my very special new close friend, YOU Kristi. And Tucker. I continue to gain the most incredible education about autism and I’m grateful every day for what I learn. You amaze me as a mother and I love you to pieces for who you are as a person, and for the mother you are to that perfect little boy. That’s how I see him. For real. Just let him know I’m still starving for our guy’s night out with homemade mac n’ cheese! XOXO’S to you both always 🙂March 7, 2014 – 3:26 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Mike, I can’t tell you how much it means to me that you have embraced Tucker as your little buddy and also as a perfect little boy. He really is, in all of the big ways. Sure, he scores zeros on tests that “measure” his age but fuck those tests, right?
      I loved your quote last week, too, by the way. So much and very happy to have you as a friend as well.
      Thanks so so so much for wanting to learn more about autism because of Tucker. He’s not every kid with it, but he’s here, and important, and brave. Thanks huge for your support.March 8, 2014 – 1:03 amReplyCancel

  • Tarana - Thanks for the list, it really needs to be shared. It’s important to remember, before we stare at another mom, that no one knows her child the way she does.March 7, 2014 – 8:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for getting it, friend. And yeah, nobody likes her kid to be stared at, no matter why!March 8, 2014 – 1:12 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Within my hospital baby group, two kids were diagnosed early with autism and with both, the mothers did have sinking suspicions but the rest of us didn’t know. And my friend made a post like this on FB once about what she wanted us all to know. It was beautiful. One main thing she said was that just because her son is so high functioning and we all rave about him does NOT mean he doesn’t have autism and that her time at home with him can be heartbreaking and frustrating. So basically she said that us telling her how wonderful he was didn’t help her. At all. I had no idea!
    That totally changed how I spoke to her. Her son is wonderful and beautiful and Scarlet loves to play with him. However, that doesn’t mean he doesn’t have autism.March 7, 2014 – 8:56 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, Tamara that’s so true, I mean people tell me all the time how amazingly beautiful Tucker is – and they are right – this kid’s eyes will kill anybody with their depth and beauty, but also, sure, that doesn’t take into account that he has to Do the Things He Does, either. Thanks for getting it, sistahwife.March 8, 2014 – 1:14 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - My kids think the term “autism spectrum” is kind of strange, but this post proves why it exists. Autism isn’t just one thing, with one definition. To assume a child is a certain way because they have autism or any special need is to define him by a diagnosis. When you reach out to readers, you are debunking those assumptions and creating more empathy and understanding. Thank you for that Kristi, and thank you for sharing the thoughts of your PAC tribe.March 7, 2014 – 9:43 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think the term “autism spectrum” is strange too, but I’m so much more comfortable with it than just saying “autism” for whatever reason (I’m sure that’s about me, and not about Tucker). But maybe, you just nailed why – to assume anything about a kid because you know another kid? Well. Yeah.March 8, 2014 – 1:17 amReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - I learn so much when I read your posts. I admit sometimes when I see a child in public and it looks like they are pitching a fit and the mom does nothing, I shake my head a little and judge. I won’t do that anymore. Sure, maybe some of them are outright tantrums but I will no longer just assume that. Because of you and the voice that you have for all of these brave moms and their incredible children.
    Every single point on that list needs to be heard. I think the one that struck me the most is that all kids bring uniqueness. ALL of them!March 7, 2014 – 10:01 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - All kids DO bring uniqueness, Sandy, and I’m so with you on judging other people’s kids, and other people’s parenting methods. The thing is, though, we don’t know. We don’t know what else is going on – sometimes, maybe you SHOULD shake your head a little bit. God knows I do. But sometimes, like when Tucker refuses to wear a jacket, it’s not bad parenting. It’s respecting our kids. Thanks much for this.March 8, 2014 – 1:25 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah (est. 1975) - My 6yo son, who is not on the spectrum, is nonetheless a MASSIVE hand-flapper (like, MASSIVE) and has been ever since he was 3 months old. He sometimes gets weird looks and behind-the-hand comments when we are out and about. I just want to say to people: if you have questions (“Why is he doing that?”) just ask. It’s okay.

    I wonder if you feel the same?

    As an epileptic myself, I came to the conclusion long ago that I felt better when people with questions (or who were tempted to pass judgment based on very little information) just asked me, so that they could get edja-ma-cated and more informed. Sadly, people often don’t choose that route. What are your feelings about it?March 7, 2014 – 10:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so completely feel the same, Sarah. I am more than happy to answer any questions about Tucker, his delays, autism, and also more than happy to say “I don’t know” but to start a dialogue about it. Kids are kids, and I just want people with typical ones to accept my son the way that they assume I’ll accept theirs.
      I’d definitely welcome a dialogue. And I thank you for asking, because that says a lot.March 8, 2014 – 1:30 amReplyCancel

  • Katia - Oh wow. What an incredibly important empathy checklist. Number 8-10 broke my heart a little bit. I don’t know why any parent wouldn’t extrapolate their own sense of love and acceptance of their child onto other kids. It breaks my heart that special needs moms would have to ASK for that acceptance. Not fair. Thank you for this list which really brings things home for me. Such an important observation on not assuming that all spectrum kids should be similar in a way. Why should they when non-spectrum kids aren’t. I loved #6 as well. We cannot dismiss their creativity just because it may manifest itself in a different way.March 7, 2014 – 10:34 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Katia, it breaks my heart that we have to ask for that acceptance, too, but it’s a reality. It’s like, parents bond with parents of non-special-needs kids, because they feel like “OH isn’t this cute?” And it IS cute. But what our kids are doing, much behind schedule maybe, is also adorable and worthy of embrace. Thanks so much for getting that part. It means so much to me that you do.March 8, 2014 – 1:33 amReplyCancel

  • karen - great post once again and so true. I think there needs to be a lot less judging from people, every child and family is different. if we all accepted and understood that life would be awesome.March 7, 2014 – 10:39 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YES!!! Every child IS awesome and it’s the grown-ups who just need to realize it. Thanks, Karen.March 8, 2014 – 1:34 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh I love this…they live OUT LOUD. Perfect, my friend, simply perfect. I think #10 is my favorite. We have to accept that their kids are perfect, right?March 7, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - No doubt!! We are so expected to accept our friends’ kids!!! Why should we have to HOPE that they accept ours???March 8, 2014 – 1:35 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - “Please accept our kids the way that you assume we will accept yours.” That’s it right there.
    Thank you. I shall.March 7, 2014 – 11:24 amReplyCancel

  • nothingbythebook - Love. Simply love.March 7, 2014 – 11:26 amReplyCancel

  • Michele - Kristi – this list makes so much sense, and has given me a lot to think about. Thank you for posting.March 7, 2014 – 11:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for reading and commenting, Michele. I think it’s important for people to know that it’s okay to ask questions, and feel awkward, but that our kids are just kids.March 8, 2014 – 12:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - Thank you for putting this out there. For my part, someone who tries so hard to respond in a positive way- when I hear someone talking about a child who didn’t seem to be behaving properly or wearing at hat when it was below freezing and what are his parents thinking? I’ll speak up.March 7, 2014 – 12:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You rock, Jean. It’s such a small thing to remind people that not all kids will wear hats and it makes such a big difference to further understanding and to stop assumptions that bad parenting is involved. Thanks so much.March 8, 2014 – 12:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Great list Kristi, I continue to learn here as a bystander. I don’t gawk but I’m also probably very obvious in pretending not to see or hear.March 7, 2014 – 12:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, I hear you on being obvious in pretending to not see or hear, as I think I’m obvious about it too. I usually just try to make sure to give the mom a smile if she seems stressed out – just so she knows I’m not annoyed, if that makes sense. It’s hard to know what to do sometimes though – like when a child is obviously physically deformed or something, I always feel like “does the mom want to chat? does she want me to be busy and not notice?” I don’t know. I guess we’ll all figure out what to do together.March 8, 2014 – 12:07 pmReplyCancel

  • jamie@southmainmuse - I hope some day at a blogging conference or something you meet @LeisaHammett. Her daughter Grace is a phenomenal artist and Leisa is a huge autism and art advocate. Love her. http://www.leisahammett.com/March 7, 2014 – 1:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Jamie. I haven’t heard of Leisa before – I’ll have to check her out. I appreciate you letting me know about her!March 8, 2014 – 12:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - This seems like an odd thing to say, but it amazes me how often that people on the “lighter” side of whatever their issue may be have a tougher time of it in terms of services, etc. I grew up with someone developmentally disabled who isn’t “bad enough” to fit in with others similarly diagnosed, but not “good enough” to fit in with her “normal” peers. I know how alone and frustrated she feels trying to fit in and what a difficult time she has gone through trying to obtain services. Others with physical disabilities aren’t “bad enough” to participate in such and such, but still can’t play/join those without physical disabilities. They also seem to be judged more harshly because people don’t necessarily see what’s going on. I know someone else who is frequently assumed to be drunk. We joke about it, but I know how annoying it can be because she can’t do anything about it, and we don’t see her that way. It’s all very strange/frustrating. Wish there was a magic answer. 🙁March 7, 2014 – 1:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, what an insightful comment and wow to your friend who people assume is drunk. That must be rough. I know what you mean about people on the lighter side of an issue seeming to not fit in anywhere and I think it’s a problem in a lot of ways – school placement being top of mind. We have not yet had a chance to look at the kindergarten options for next year yet, nor met to discuss them, but I’m already nervous about it. While of course, I’d like Tucker to be around typical developing kids his age in a classroom, I also never want him to feel dumb, less than, or different in a bad way, either. Thanks so much for your insight.March 8, 2014 – 12:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Brianne - Hi Kristi – Your PAC mom friend Joanna sent out a link to your blog on the POAC-NoVA mailing list last week, and I’m so glad she did. I’m a PAC mom too and didn’t realize there was a blog out there that hits so close to home, in more ways than one. Just wanted to say hello and thanks for putting yourself out there.

    I would add to your list: Kids with autism and special needs smile and can be happy! My daughter can be very bubbly, which often confuses people if they find out she has ASD, as if the two can’t exist in one person. They also usually have yet to witness her not-so-bubbly side 🙂March 7, 2014 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Brianne,
      Thanks so much for visiting and for the great addition to the list. You’re so right that they can be happy!! People have so many misconceptions. I’m still learning, too. When Tucker first started PAC, I was convinced he just had a language delay…sigh. I’m so glad that Joanna sent Finding Ninee out to the POAC list and that you found us here. Thanks again!!March 8, 2014 – 12:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Joanna - I love it! I read this post at least 10x. It’s awesome, powerful and true. Thanks for being there for so many people including me 🙂March 7, 2014 – 3:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia@ Menopausal Mother - #5 and #6– so perfect and powerful. Tucker is beautiful, Kristi.March 7, 2014 – 9:59 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Marcia! I agree that he’s beautiful 😉 and am sure I’m not biased at all!March 8, 2014 – 12:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Don - Our friends’ daughter never really “looked” autistic unless you really paid attention I think, so I was always on the defensive, probably even more than her parents, when we were in public and she started on one of her tangents or whatever. Special needs parents have to deal with the same things as parents of regular kids(is that the term to use, lol) plus the extra crap and sometimes, it’s not fair. These sorts of lists and posts about how you want others to treat your kids are important. A lot of people just don’t know, even though many of us want to know, if that makes sense. As always, Tucker is beautiful.March 7, 2014 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You rock for looking out for her Don! That’s awesome as are you. And yeah, we have to deal with the same stuff as all parents and some other worries as well, obviously. I love that you want to know, too. And happy happy birthday, DOAT.March 8, 2014 – 1:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Real Life Parenting - Oh, Kristi. Every time I read your stuff I want to be a better person. I want to make a positive mark in the world. I want to do and be more.

    Another post I love. <3March 7, 2014 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, RLP, you make my heart all happy and fluttery and stuff. You already are a better person, making way big positive marks in the world. And way big is totally grammatically correct. xoMarch 8, 2014 – 1:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Kat - I am very grateful every day that neither of my kids are special needs kids and have tremendous respect for parents who live with this. I can’t imagine what it is like to be in your shoes. I have learned over the years not to judge parents I see in public with children who are “acting out” because, if I don’t know them, then I can’t possibly know their situation. If I know that a child has autism, I always take my cues for interacting with them from their parents; after all, they know their child best.

    Thank you for posting this for those of us who are not in your shoes.March 8, 2014 – 9:42 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kat, thanks so much for the great comment. I love that you don’t judge parents when you see that their kids are acting out in public – you’re so right that we don’t know the situation. The kid might have sensory processing issues, and what are the parents to do? Never go anywhere? That’s not very realistic. Thanks for getting it!March 8, 2014 – 1:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Steck - Another beautiful post, Kristi. I’m so glad there’s more information out in the public eye than ever before. People are interested and learning, so all these tips make a difference. And…Tucker looks like he’s having a fabulous time in the snow. So, cute…March 8, 2014 – 10:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Jennifer! Tucker does love playing in the snow – it’s awesome to watch. Of course, he likes throwing snow in my face, but seeing his smile is almost worth that. Thanks for reminding me that people ARE interested in learning. xoMarch 8, 2014 – 1:37 pmReplyCancel

  • April - Your story reminded me of one when my friend thought her son had autism. I remember trying to reassure her that the time frames for child development were just guidelines. So I was right until I was wrong. I had to apologize for my ignorance to her. He is a blossoming little boy, who has autism. Thanks for sharing the story.March 8, 2014 – 7:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - April. WOW. Powerful. I was probably that mom. The thing is, we were all right, until we were wrong. Thank YOU.March 9, 2014 – 11:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - what you said is right on target and perfect. It is nice to know you have a good handle on it and have accepted what it is OK to accept. When my kids were little NO ONE knew anything. One of my friends (you would search all over in all sorts of ways to find a parent with a child with autism) said…”It’s like we’re hacking through the jungle with no compass and just a machete”. I never forgot that. I never forgot any of the things we went through, individually and together. thanks, jeanMarch 8, 2014 – 8:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jean, thank you so much for sharing – while it is better and different now, we still had a lot of struggle in trying to figure out (deny?) that what this is is autism. I love the quote about the jungle and likely will remember that forever as well. Thanks so much for sharing it!March 9, 2014 – 11:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Jean Yates - Please do not misunderstand me. I would never ever tell you that what you have gone through and will go though is anything “less” that what we went though, just because we did it a generation ago.
      In fact, the way I see it, two machetes are better than one, and it is comforting to me to have met you.
      In fact, I have had your button on my sidebar for around a month because I like it so much! xox jeanMarch 10, 2014 – 6:49 amReplyCancel

      • Kristi Campbell - So sorry if I made it sound like we are going through “less.” That was not my intent at all, and if anything, I think it must have been MUCH harder before autism and special needs were a part of school’s awareness and curriculum. It’s still obviously a button for me but seriously, I feel so much for parents who dealt with issues like the one my son has before they were more understood.
        Love the Two machetes are better than one analogy and didn’t realize that you love somebody with a developmental delay as well, until you said so now. I’ve admired your beading skills and jewelry but really had no idea. I’d love to hear more, if you’d like to share. i also have an Our Land Series, if you want to check it out -I accept stories about personal struggles and finding empathy for them. Thank you so much for getting back to me.March 11, 2014 – 12:14 amReplyCancel

  • lizzy - muddle-headed mamma - What a brilliant list. It’s what I wished I’d read before I became a teacher. I have heard many conversations numbers 3 and 5. I think that’s an essential discussion to make everyone aware of – the spectrum is broad and individual children have individual needs.March 9, 2014 – 10:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think it’s an important conversation to have as well and hate that this stuff is not more federally mandated. They’re saying 1/50 kids now. Even if they’re wrong, and it’s still 1/88, or 1/120, it’s too many to not have programs for!!!March 9, 2014 – 11:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Aw. Now I feel bad like I’m in denial about Tucker. I feel like I know him and that no, he doesn’t have autism. The doctors just don’t know what they’re talking about 🙂 I remember the post you shared about him going on a prom date sometime in the future and being “normal.” He is normal. 🙂 Is that bad that I look at him this way when I read your blog? I know autism doesn’t always look the same, but you and Tucker are like my next door neighbors that I visit regularly or something. Perhaps I look at him as normal because I never once did or thought any of these things about him that many people think when they see an autistic kid even after hearing so many stories about him. I know you experience things that moms with kids who aren’t autistic may not experience but so many things you share is the same as what I go through mostly in my life with my son and family. I still think Tucker will be fine 🙂 But I totally hear these moms. 🙂March 9, 2014 – 11:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw sweets don’t feel bad!!! I’m in denial about Tucker, too! 😀
      You do know him, and you don’t, too, because of course it’s much harder to write about the stuff that IS weird/quirky than the stuff that’s the same. I think that it’s important to write about the same though. Because, although he IS different (he really is), he’s also sooo much more the same than he’s different, ya know? Like he wants friends, loves his best buddy, wants to be tickled and cuddled, and tries to manipulate us. SO from your perspective, he is the same. I hope you will meet him one day (and that I can meet yours as well and can’t wait to see photos of the new baby – hurry up LOL.). DO NOT HURRY that was a joke. 😀
      I know so much of it’s the same. I get where you are. It’s also different, because Tucker is 4 1/2 and has a hard time with things that some 2 year olds don’t. His language comes hard to him. Too hard to be fair…but it’s coming, which is lucky, because some of his friends don’t really speak much at all. So we have that. And we’re blessed.March 9, 2014 – 11:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Ruchira - Just today I met a mom who volunteers her time at PACE. I got to know so much about this organization that it brought tears in my eyes and I am seriously thinking of giving my time to such an orgaization that is trying to bring so much to kids and their parents.

    Just reading your blog, makes me realize the pain Kristi. All I wanna do is hug you, my friend!

    hang in there, cause i definitely see light at the end of this tunnel.March 9, 2014 – 4:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, really, Ruchira? That’s so wonderful that your friend volunteers!!! I love that!!! And please also know that any pain that parents like me feel is more than worth it – we don’t see our kids as anything but our kids most of the time. Sure, we notice their differences, but to us, they don’t seem like they should affect people wanting to know who they are because they are AMAZING and awesome, and also? Thank you 😀
      I see light now too.March 9, 2014 – 11:49 pmReplyCancel

      • Kristi Campbell - Also, not sure what PACE is, but I was talking about PAC which is = to preschool autism class. So if PACE is something big, I apologize for not knowing about what that means. Yikes sorry about that assumption.March 9, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Love it! I felt some of these same thing when I taught special needs preschoolers. I had one in particular who had behavioral issues and the other teachers – educational “professionals” -would seem so annoyed when he had a meltdown in the middle of the hall or during an assembly. Their looks said volumes even though they said nothing.March 9, 2014 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Lisa. I hate that you know the look. Every kid deserves compassion and the fact that they were, instead, considered a pain in the butt? Well. Sad.March 9, 2014 – 11:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - Thanks for sharing at FF! I hope you’ll come again!March 9, 2014 – 11:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Nina - Kristi… I love, love this. I love how you write, period. And thank you for sharing this. You invite us into your world with clarity and heart and I can’t help but admire you for being fair and patient with us parents who aren’t raising special needs kids.

    It’s so easy to assume or freak out or react, but in the end, all our kids are still kids. Kids who need us to be kind to them, not to give them awkward looks and stares.March 10, 2014 – 11:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Cheers to all kids just being kids! THAT, right there, is why I probably have this blog and I thank you for saying so and recognizing that. So much.March 10, 2014 – 11:37 pmReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - This reminds me a lot of my Our Land.
    It’s all so true. Isaiah has bad days and great days. And few in between. And the truth is I never know what we’re going to get which leads to some nerve wracking days….
    This is a great post. I am sure it will help a lot of non-bloggers 😉 😉March 10, 2014 – 7:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, TTTx10 Jen. I guess we never know, and honestly? I really do hope it helps although I also feel like we didn’t say that much new, but also know it’s new to some parents, hopefully. I mean I hope, anyway…I know you get it…and thank you.March 10, 2014 – 11:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle - Every kid IS different…it’s crazy to lump everyone together. Thanks for sharing it…I’m going to pass it along too. I think it’s important for people to understand that autism is has a broad spectrum, and everyone has a different normal.March 10, 2014 – 10:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Michelle, you’re right that every kid is different, and I guess what I’m trying to say is that I hope everybody can learn to accept our atypical kids the way they just assume we’ll accept theirs. I think that’s the take-away….March 10, 2014 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Crystal - What a wonderful post, Kristi! I’m going to share this with some parents I know who are struggling with autism and pushing their kiddo awfully hard. Reading these words might make a difference. 🙂March 11, 2014 – 8:34 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so very much, Crystal! I know a family who is really struggling right now too and trying to push their son to do things that he’s really not ready for – it’s hard. Thanks again.March 28, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

  • Lady Lilith - Acceptance is the key. I work with special needs children and so many people feel sorry for them. I find if you accept any child or who they are, you can raise the bar and help them reach the next level.March 11, 2014 – 11:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yes yes yes to please don’t feel sorry for special needs kids! Acceptance is everything.March 28, 2014 – 10:00 amReplyCancel

  • Andie - Thanks for sharing this awareness. Great insights on this post.March 12, 2014 – 6:11 amReplyCancel

  • linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Oh Kristi: Yes Tucker looks perfect. He looks exactly like Lindsey did at that age. I could see some differences, but not enough and besides, she looked so frickin’ normal (typical). Some people said I had nothing to worry about. Other’s said her traits weren’t typical. It was a confusing time–especially since she was my first too. Then we had Michael who whizzed past his sisters milestones and surpassed her quick, but still, we thought she would catch up. Every story is different. Lindsey didn’t catch up and the gap widened and the older she got, she often had a untypical look about her that I’d never noticed when she was small. I think the gap just finally widened enough between her peers and herself that—oh, I finally had to admit that she really was what the doctors said. But that is a different story.

    I love the list. I love the first line: The word autism entered my heart as a whisper. I love the preface. Thanks for another awesome post.March 12, 2014 – 12:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much Linda. It really is a confusing place especially when different people have differing opinions of Tucker and that he may “catch up” or whatever.March 28, 2014 – 10:05 amReplyCancel

  • A Morning Grouch - Love this post – so, so good. I teach my students who are learning about autism the old adage, “You’ve met one person with autism, you’ve met one person with autism”. Try to beat that in their brains – ALL of us are unique – individuals on the spectrum are no different.March 12, 2014 – 7:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Monika Sharma - Absolutely right, This post is really amazing & I appreciate such a wonderful & easily explanation. Which a mom must know ! Great Post.March 13, 2014 – 3:07 amReplyCancel

  • The Monko - What a great post. Many of the behaviours you listed when your son was young are things my son did too – including the head banging and running laps – so I get why you might be concerned and yet not convinced.
    I never know when a child is making funny noises or acting in a quirky way whether it is better to look or not look. Its really helpful to have some mum’s perspectives on what they’d like from me. I usually try a glance and a smile and hope that that conveys ” your child is sweet and while your child’s behaviour is interesting to me it is in no way bothering me so please don’t feel stressed by me”. Even if they don’t get that from it I hope the smile says “hey we are all parents together’.March 13, 2014 – 9:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think a glance and a smile meant to convey that the mom shouldn’t be stressed by you is perfect and yes, we’re all parents together – above all differing abilities! Thanks much!March 28, 2014 – 10:25 amReplyCancel

  • Courtney Conover - Wow, Kristi. Just…wow. Numbers 7, 8, and 9 made the levies break. I’m all-out bawling over here. I don’t have an autistic child, so I’m not even going to begin to say I know what parents of autistic children go through day in and day out. However. I do know that judgment — regardless of the reason — hurts like a bitch. The way Scotty has been perceived based solely on his language delay has brought out a level of frustration in me that I didn’t know I was capable of feeling. People can be mean. Very mean. Even now, though he has made tremendous strides and we are not fighting the same fight, I am grateful for what his challenges have taught me — about him and other children.

    Beautiful post, Kristi. Thank You.March 13, 2014 – 11:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry Courtney to have made you cry. I hate that you, too, know the judgement and that people have been mean. 🙁
      It’s sad how judgmental people can be without knowing what they’re talking about – I hope that we can all get closer to a place in which each of us is more accepted for who we are and not for what we may struggle with. xoMarch 28, 2014 – 10:36 amReplyCancel

  • Tracie - The thing that sticks out to me from this list is how often possibly well-meaning people who do not have medical degrees, try to argue or disagree with the diagnosis you have received from an actual doctor. That is very frustrating.March 13, 2014 – 6:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know what you mean, Tracie! People don’t know what to say or do. I honestly think that most people are well-meaning but at times can be hurtful and insensitive. Thanks so much for coming by!March 28, 2014 – 10:37 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - It’s been far too long since I’ve been over here, huh? Life’s been a bit nuts. How are you???
    I loved this…Our special needs kids are here, on purpose, and OutLoud. I’m always hesitant to jump in on a discussion like this because I fear someone will say I have no business, but I think special needs is as wide a swath as the autism spectrum – there are all different kinds. This line fits and I can’t tell you how great and how well timed this list and post are for me right now. As always, you have such wonderful insights here.
    I’ll be back for more – lots to catch up on!
    And Tucker, by the way, is gorgeous!March 22, 2014 – 10:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Lisa!
      I’m doing well thanks. And no worries – I know you’ve got lots going on these days. Me, too, being as I’m seeing this comment six days later! Yikes! Also? You have my expressed permission and even encouragement to jump in any time because everybody has business when it comes to accepting people for who they are. All the time.
      Hope you’re having a great week!March 28, 2014 – 10:39 amReplyCancel

  • Lillian Connelly - You’re doing a good job on this whole mom thing. I think Tucker is lucky to have such a amazing advocate in his corner. I am sure you have inspired other mothers to speak out about this too.October 21, 2014 – 11:11 amReplyCancel

  • Roshni - This is so warm and wonderful to read this morning! I’m going to share it with someone who needs it right now! Thank you for bringing my attention to this link, Kristi!October 21, 2014 – 12:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Jana - I think, like most things, people fear the unknown. They feel awkward and uncomfortable because they don’t understand it — or are afraid of saying or doing the wrong thing. This post is great because it gives some valuable information — I learned a lot!October 21, 2014 – 11:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Crystal - This was exactly . . . Right and good and so much of my own heart.January 28, 2015 – 9:04 amReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Peluso - This was like reading about my 3 year old son, Michael. Even the pictures are similar. I am so grateful there are moms like you out there to bring a face to our very unique little guys and gals!February 26, 2015 – 3:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Ellie - Well said! As a future educator, this post really helped put in perspective a parent’s feelings towards other’s views of their child. I thought that number 6 on your list was especially important to remember-all children are capable of learning, as long as we find the right way to do it!November 28, 2015 – 8:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Erin Fullerton - As an occupational therapy (OT) graduate student my knowledge of OT grows with each assignment. At the same time the depth of my connection with the core principles of our practice reinforces who I want to be as an OT practitioner. The OT Code of Ethics outlines the seven core values as, “altruism, equality, freedom, justice, dignity, truth and prudence”. The appeal for justice is a call for advocacy. I want to be an advocate for families of children with autism spectrum disorder (ASD). I have read studies about the link between PTSD and parents of children with ASD. The Disability Scoop notes that their “chronic stress [is] comparable to combat soldiers”. I believe the family-centered and community-based practice in OT can be a source of support for parents. OTs trained in these practices recognize the impact of ASD on the whole family dynamic and communities, whether a local association or an online community of a blog, can be created to be an outlet for expression and encouragement. No parent should feel they are alone. So I was thrilled to come across your blog and I believe it is a significant resource. Thank you for sharing your family’s story and teaching me about the realities of life with ASD. I pledge to continue to follow your blog, and similar family blogs, to better prepare as an OT practitioner.December 14, 2015 – 3:34 pmReplyCancel

As a child, I thought that people’s lives happened on purpose. That you found love when you’d planned to, and that babies came when you decided that you were ready for them. At some point along the way, I realized that life happens accidentally while you’re still figuring out what it is that you don’t […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Janine Huldie - Kristi, Tucker will totally know that he is loved and the perfect Tucker, because not a day will go by that you will not let him not know that. Seriously, my friend you are wonderful mother and know this from the bottom of my heart. Love you and sending hugs tonight!! 🙂February 27, 2014 – 10:07 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Janine. and I know exactly what you meant about the perfect (imperfect because we all are) Tucker. Love you huge, too. And I appreciate the hugs, much, and a lot.March 1, 2014 – 12:12 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Also, FIRST, but I don’t even care, because your WORDS.

    Ahhhhh such mojo you gots *twinkles* 😀 <3February 27, 2014 – 10:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love that you use the word “twinkles.”

      the end.March 1, 2014 – 12:29 amReplyCancel

      • Considerer - Cos your writing makes me feel *twinkly* 😀

        And I was FIRST, okay, but because I posted up there in the FB comments bit BEFORE JANINE WAS HERE (yes, SantyKid, that’s a direct challenge) and then came down here to post. So it counts. *folds arms*March 1, 2014 – 1:20 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - Tucker should never know that number, and I’m sure you’ll make sure he doesn’t. Because a number doesn’t define who he is. I was talking to a friend today about her daughter, who just had extensive testing to determine whether she had ADHD. One test was an IQ test, and my friend will never tell her daughter that number. She doesn’t want her to feel like she can’t live up to it, or to feel like she is limited by it. Whether it’s low or high, it’s not who she is. Because as you said, every kid has the power to change the world.February 27, 2014 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana, you’re right – he will never know that number. Unless, of course, he ends up rocking drawing a house and cutting with scissors, in which case, we can joke about it later. Or not. I think it’s really smart that your friend isn’t telling her daughter her IQ test number – because no matter what it is, it’s just not worth knowing.March 1, 2014 – 10:57 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Once again the stark reminder to me: You are blessed to have Tucker and that little chappy is so very lucky to have you.February 27, 2014 – 10:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - Numbers mean nothing. Remember, old people are not really old? Kristi, you’re outdoing yourself with every next post I read. I highlighted the opening sentence thinking this was such a brilliant observation that I’d want to come back to in my comment, but oh wow, there was just so much in this post and it gripped me so tightly that I finished reading it gasping for air. Numbers are never a competent way to summarize a person. None of us should be measured against our surroundings but only against ourselves.I know it’s so hard to see that number, but Tucker made progress with his name, he says stuff like what he said this week about his legs being shaky (I can’t remember the exact words he used, just admiring him for using such a perfect term).

    This post should be in the dictionary under “motherly love”.February 27, 2014 – 10:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw! Thank you, Katia!! Yeah, he said his feet were slow after he was so sick earlier in the week. It was beyond adorable.
      I love that you said none of us should be measured against our surroundings but only against ourselves. I wish I’d written that sentence in this post. You’re brilliant and wonderful. 😀March 1, 2014 – 10:59 amReplyCancel

  • Kerith Stull - Wow. Again.. your post blew me away. Such honesty. I don’t think I can even think about how I used that “R-Word” before, let alone write about it…and publicly. Kudos. And for the record, I truly hate numbers. Can someone really tell me my daughter has an IQ of 42 when she can read and write and do at least simple math? Does a number reflect her energy and unwavering positive spirit. Does a percentage on a doctor’s chart show me how truly beautiful she is? (inside and out) F-that. (And I NEVER use that F word lightly, if ever.) Thank you for opening up and pouring out your heart to us. You simply rock, my friend.February 27, 2014 – 10:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, Kerith, I take this as a huge compliment from you – thank you. You’re so right that a number has nothing to do with Brielle’s unique perfection, how much she does do, and who she is. Here’s to our kids being exactly who they are and who they will become regardless and in spite of any dumb meaningless numbers!March 1, 2014 – 11:02 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie D - Oh man. Crying over this. The love is so apparent, so fierce, and so beautiful. I loved reading this.February 27, 2014 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

  • donofalltrades - Tucker strikes me as the type of kid I would enjoy having a cold beer with someday. I look forward to that. His mom is pretty kickass too.February 27, 2014 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yes, yes, he will be fun to have a beer with one day and I agree that his mom is kickass. 😀March 1, 2014 – 11:08 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Well, this hurt to read. But in a good way of understanding that someone else understands.February 27, 2014 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for getting it, Sarah. I’m sorry that it hurt to read…it hurt a bit to write, too, but I’m glad that I did.March 1, 2014 – 11:09 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - If Tucker ever does see a 1% on a piece of paper or a computer screen. Let it be known that he is in the elite 1% category of the best of the best. That none of us possess what that young man does for us to learn from. To have an uninhibited smile of complete joy that lifts all of us up. To talk with a few hitches for now with complete abandon until he goes flying past us all to someday speak of his journey. When he’s holding hands with that pretty girl on that date as his mom watches through the window. After you and Don are done with your beer we’ll go scarf on Mac N Cheese, Tucker. Love ya little buddy 🙂February 27, 2014 – 11:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Mike. Thanks for getting it and for appreciating Tucker’s amazing smile. It’s truly something wonderful. He says YES to mac n cheese and doesn’t want to wait to grow up to eat it – hope that’s okay!
      😀March 1, 2014 – 11:29 amReplyCancel

    • Mike - Very important! Ask Tucker if we’re going Kraft out of the box or or one of my otherworldly homemade recipes. Either way is fine with me…pick homemade, pick homemade, pick homemade…and can’t wait! 🙂March 1, 2014 – 12:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Gayla - Thanks for writing this Kristi…exactly how I feel too. :-). Thanks for writing it down….February 27, 2014 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank YOU Gayla. For getting it, for reading it, and for being awesome in general.March 1, 2014 – 11:30 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Ahh…sister wife. Your words!!
    Read each one twice.
    I even have a wet tissue in my hand, tucked under my palm as I type.February 27, 2014 – 11:49 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry about the wet tissue but good job on not just using your sleeve like I might have maybe.March 1, 2014 – 4:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Great post Kristi, filled with so much love. It’s a blessing to love a child so much in the womb. I’ve known women who didn’t love until later. Or loved in the womb and not later. I loved Christopher from the second line. I was still naive at that point that my life would go according to plans just five years behind schedule. But it’s all good 😉February 28, 2014 – 6:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It really is a blessing to love a child so much while he’s still in the womb. For whatever reason, thinking I may lose him made the pregnancy (and the baby) real to me somehow. Thanks so much and yeah, I hear ya on being a bit later than expected!March 1, 2014 – 4:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Tarana - Reading this, I realise that we must be really careful about what we think and say, because you never know how life is going to turn out for you, and what challenges it has in store. I’m sure your son is perfect the way he is, and that’s all he needs to know.February 28, 2014 – 8:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks much. You’re so right that we need to be careful about what we think and say. Life has a way of proving us wrong when we are (like I was).March 1, 2014 – 4:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - So beautiful, Kristi! As a former teacher of special needs preschoolers, I have a love/hate relationship with those numbers. I realize that, on some level, they are necessary, but they should NEVER solely define a child (or any person). Isn’t there some quote that “life is what happens while you are making other plans?” I’ve heard something like that before. I think it’s true. I always wanted to be a mom, but I never pictured myself with three daughters. Life is not what I “planned” for it to be – it’s better! 🙂February 28, 2014 – 9:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I so get what you mean about having a love/hate relationship with the numbers. On one hand, we need them (Tucker did qualify for OT after all of this) but on the other hand I don’t want to see that he’s at 1% for his age. Ugh. And yes to life being better than we’d planned! Cheers to that.March 1, 2014 – 4:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - I don’t even know where to start, so I’ll start with how fucking awesome this is. So awesome it warrants the f-bomb on every level.

    YES, motherhood gives us perspective that we would never have otherwise. And, YES, our children change our lives the moment we pee on the stick and are hit with the realization that we’re responsible for nurturing another life. And then again when they come into this world and don’t immediately cry out and we willingly barter our own lives in exchange for that first piercing scream. Again when we hold them for the first time and see them in all their wrinkly perfection and know that no matter who they are or what they become, we will love them.

    Fuck the numbers, Kristi. Your son is so much more than a number. And he will know this because you will show him with your actions, your words, and your love.February 28, 2014 – 9:32 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yay for f-bombs and for saying Fuck the numbers, Nicole. Yes yes yes to seeing their wrinkly perfection and knowing we’ll love them no matter what. Always and forever and above all else.
      Thanks, sweets.March 1, 2014 – 4:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh my friend. I was there. I sat in Boo’s neurologist office and asked if she was retarded. Before I knew that it wasn’t a punch line. Before I knew that I would one day have to take a stand against the word that could hurt. But a word that is still true. They are retarded–they are not stagnant. They are growing and learning but at a much slower pace. A pace that is for that horrible word, retarded. BUT NOT STOPPED. They are not just holding in place.

    They are loving and growing and changing the world. And one day when they are at prom we will say fuck the “r’ word.February 28, 2014 – 10:15 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kerri thanks for making me feel less dumb for asking if my kid was going to be retarded. You’re right – they’re NOT just holding in place and are loving and growing and changing the world. Here’s to saying fuck the “r” word at prom. With wine, of course.March 1, 2014 – 5:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Beth Teliho - GAH. you people are killin’ me with these beautiful, touching posts! Don’t misunderstand, I loved it. Every word. So incredibly true that they change us before they’re even here. That you love them so HARD before you see their face.

    I’ve had very naïve thoughts when I was younger, too. Awful ones. And motherhood kicked them in the ass. Thank god.February 28, 2014 – 10:38 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Beth,
      Cheers to motherhood kicking our dumbass thoughts to the curb and yeah, we really do love them so hard before even seeing their little baby faces.March 1, 2014 – 5:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Tiff - This is an honest and beautiful post, and I thank you for writing it.February 28, 2014 – 10:41 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle Liew - And Tucker is, above all things, perfect. Simply because he is he, Kristi.February 28, 2014 – 11:35 amReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - I know I’ve said it before but I will say it again, and probably again another day. Tucker is blessed to have you as his mama. Your are blessed to have him as your son. My heart is so full right now that I can’t even think of something intelligent to say so I will just tell you that I love this post and I think you are top of the flippin’ heap, my friend. Tbe very top. XXFebruary 28, 2014 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Sandy what an amazing compliment that I cherish because it comes from you!! Thank you. And I agree that I am very blessed to have this amazing little boy as my son. So blessed. xx back at ya.March 1, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - This post reminded me of something – a funny confession of sorts. I have a cousin who is developmentally delayed, and one day when I was a kid, I was playing downstairs while my Mom was upstairs with a neighbor. I was just starting up the stairway when I heard “My Chrissy is different, she’s ‘special’.” To this day, I have no idea what the beginning of that conversation was, but the bottom dropped out of my world! As I knew my cousin to be “special,” I thought OMG! If really crazy people don’t know they’re crazy, maybe “special” people know they’re “special.” A very traumatic moment for me. I forget how I confirmed that I was “normal.” I probably asked my sister. This confusion was only compounded the day my Dad was mad at me for “acting like a second grader” … when I was in the second grade. Had to ask Mom about that one lol. He was mad at me for groaning about doing yard work at the time. 🙂February 28, 2014 – 2:07 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, that’s so funny that you thought maybe you were “special” too in the way that crazy people don’t know they’re crazy! HA. Also that’s funny that your dad was annoyed with you for acting like a second grader when you were in the second grade! I still groan about doing yard work, by the way.March 1, 2014 – 5:18 pmReplyCancel

      • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - Lucky for me, I live in an apartment, so I don’t have a yard to have to work in. It’s also coming in VERY handy right now to have someone else do the snow removal! 😉March 1, 2014 – 5:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Perfection.February 28, 2014 – 2:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - So beautiful, and full of so much love. I remember realizing how much I loved my son after the first ultrasound I had that actually looked like a baby. I just remember thinking, he’s perfect, and I am going to love him no matter what. But I’ve also realized that we have to work hard for them, and fight for them, in different ways. It doesn’t matter what number Tucker is now, numbers don’t show our potential (I tell that to my scale). I’m hoping he’s totally rocking the crayons and scissors after his OT. Good luck to you guys. PS: When did Tucker grow up so much? WOW, he’s so big, and handsome! And I love the Colorado shirt. 😉February 28, 2014 – 2:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jessica,
      I know – he’s getting SO tall. Everybody always think he’s like two years older than he is because he’s so tall. And you’re right – we do need to work hard for them too and fight for them in different ways. I like the Colorado shirt, too!! 😀March 1, 2014 – 5:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Another beautiful piece — love your last lines, especially about the f-ing house. My big dude has the worst handwriting ever and I’m sure he received similar numbers at some point. I recall one of his teachers saying that it didn’t matter much b/c by the time he reached high school, he’d be typing everything anyway. Guess what? She was right — it’s all keyboarding now. And my big dude still can’t draw a f-ing house. 🙂February 28, 2014 – 2:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily,
      You know, you’re right – it will be all keyboarding. I’m relieved to hear that big dude still has horrible handwriting knowing how well he’s doing socially and with everything else. I’d MUCH rather Tucker know how to talk to girls than draw a F-ing house!!!March 1, 2014 – 5:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - Kristi, this piece is amazing. I don’t think I could have written this any better myself.

    You and I have such similar stories and I could feel your words in my heart as I read them!

    Thank you!February 28, 2014 – 3:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much Echo. I really appreciate that you get it and that you shared your thoughts here!March 1, 2014 – 5:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Karen - sobbing, blows nose and wipes tears. Wow…once again I am beside myself. you have beautifully captured how we grow as women. We think we know it all and then God gives us a miracle and we begin fighting for and protecting that miracle with ever fiber of who we are. sniffles again…February 28, 2014 – 3:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - So true, Karen! Our little guys are such miracles. Sorry for the sniffles and sobbing. I was crying too, when I wrote it.March 1, 2014 – 8:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - This was a beautiful post! So much about becoming an adult is so different, and even though I KNOW that, I also know that in two years it’ll be different all over again when compared with my expectations now. And most of that is because I have a child. And that works with ANY child, I think 🙂February 28, 2014 – 3:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think you’re right that life looking differently from what we expected changes often, and with every child, Sarah.March 1, 2014 – 8:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Kristi, sometimes I think we must have lived the same life. There’s so much you write about your past that is so similar to mine. I was sure that as an older mother, I would have every test in the book and wouldn’t have a baby with major disabilities. And then I got pregnant and like you, I knew I loved that baby from the start. I lost it, but when I became pregnant again and the doctor advised an amino I said no. Because I knew I’d love my baby whatever.

    And I so, so agree with you that Tucker does not need to know he is a number. Apart from anything, it’s so easy to start living up to (or down to) what people expect. You let him be who he is, and that’s who he needs to be.February 28, 2014 – 6:06 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - We do sound like we’ve lived such similar lives, Yvonne. Thanks for the encouragement that Tucker does not need to know he’s a number, has a number, or that numbers determine what happens with his education and therapy. He’s going to be who he is, whether it breaks my heart to see a crappy number or not. Thank you so so much!!!March 1, 2014 – 8:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia@ Menopausal Mother - I know I’ve said this a gazillion times before but I’ll say to again: Kristi, you are an INCREDIBLE mother. Tucker is a beautiful boy, and God put him in your arms because HE KNEW you were the perfect mother for him. I hope one day you can turn all of these incredible blog posts into a book for Tucker—your writing is full of love for your son and I think he would be thrilled to read these one day! <3February 28, 2014 – 6:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Marcia, that is such a huge compliment coming from you, thank you. Tucker is, indeed, a beautiful boy and while I doubt my mothering skills at times, I know he’s the perfect perfect boy for me. Thank you, for this, and maybe, one day, I will put them all in a book. At least he’ll have this blog?March 1, 2014 – 11:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah | LeftBrainBuddha - Oh my gosh I love that last line that he can change the world because he has already. I love reading these posts about Tucker – you are a lucky mama and he is a lucky boy!February 28, 2014 – 7:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, Sarah!!! And I do believe he can change the world. It’s true, that he already has.March 1, 2014 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • catherine gacad - tucker is lucky to have such an amazing mama!February 28, 2014 – 7:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Steck - Tucker is adorable! I especially love his Denver, Colorado shirt. You have a way, Kristi, of making things honest and real. You always share exactly what is in your heart and that is truly amazing and such a blessing. Just, Wow!!February 28, 2014 – 8:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Jennifer. I think he’s pretty adorable, too, and also love his Denver shirt 😀
      I try to share what’s in my heart. It’s not always all the way there but it tries to be and I really appreciate you seeing the effort, and well, I guess getting it.March 1, 2014 – 11:40 pmReplyCancel

  • K - Reading this and crying. In a good way. xoxoxoxoFebruary 28, 2014 – 9:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - XOXOOX still want your last one as an Our Land and you know how much I adore you. Yay to crying in a good way….March 1, 2014 – 11:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Ilene - Kristi, you blow me over and leave me breathless every time. And this time is no different. What you’ve taught me, taught all of us, through what you tell us about Tucker…I need to go hug my kids right now – and not worry so much about the drawing or cutting in straight lines.February 28, 2014 – 9:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dude, what you have taught me is equally powerful – huge congrats on your new adventure and thank you thank you for getting and celebrating Tucker.March 2, 2014 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

  • elizabeth - As a preschool teacher, I spend my days watching kids develop skills like drawing a house or cutting on a line. There are checklists and rubrics that help us talk to parents about their child’s development. While I see the importance of having some sort of standard, I don’t want parents to obsess over a number on a piece of paper. I believe in educating the whole child and I am always watching for students who are compassionate, patient, and friendly because they skills are more important for success in life than being able to draw a house by a certain age. I guide my teaching principles based on the Einstein quote, “Everyone’s a genius. But if you judge a fish based on its ability to climb a tree, it will spend it’s whole life believing that it is stupid.” Children are the same way. A great artist may not excel in math. A fantastic athlete may not have the most patience in the classroom. And that’s okay. Because every single child has something wonderful to offer this world they just need an adult to believe in them and help them develop their talent.March 1, 2014 – 8:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - How much do I love you right now? A fucking lot. You rock, my friend,for getting this so much. Hellz to the yeah about standards meaning nothing and numbers on paper not really saying anything about the kid that they’re referring to. I love the quote “Everyone’s a genius. But if you judge a fish based on its ability to climb a tree, it will spend it’s whole life believing that it is stupid.” Thank you for sharing that. Thank you for you. You are beyond amazing and I have never forgotten the post you wrote for us, and have never stopped being grateful for it, or for this.March 2, 2014 – 12:16 amReplyCancel

  • Shay - I love it, Kristi. People realize so many things when their lives don’t go as “planned,” and it can be so hard to relate that to others who simply don’t get it. “But RETARDED is the WORD,” they’ll insist. But you put it perfectly here when you said, “While it may have originated in meaning delayed, or apply to somebody who learns more slowly, it morphed into a joke, and an ugly name.” I think people who use words like this realize this, but they don’t want to make the effort to put that realization into practice. Hopefully if their lives turn out differently than they had originally planned, they’ll remember what posts like this have tried to teach them…and hopefully others will be as understanding and sweet about their mistakes as you are here.March 1, 2014 – 9:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Shay. I adore you. Retarded WAS, indeed, the word. Still is in some cases. My own MIL has told me that the retards are God’s chosen (and that the homos are going to hell so there’s that). Hopefully, all of our lives different than we’d imagined, and more enlightened and amazing than we’d ever have even dreamed of.March 2, 2014 – 12:28 amReplyCancel

  • Jen @ Real Life Parenting - Kristi, this is so beautiful. We all have thoughts about what our children will be. I know I did. And I struggled a bit at first when that was not my reality. As I came to terms with my thee difference, I realized that I hadn’t come to terms with the reality of him, but of ME. it was my own growth that needed to occur. I loved this so much. So, so much.March 1, 2014 – 9:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jen, you’re so right that the difference lies within US and not them. That while they are “different,” it is us who becomes so, and should. Thank you my awesome pal.March 2, 2014 – 12:30 amReplyCancel

  • Cathy - We grownups are so silly, aren’t we? I remember when I was pregnant, praying to God that I wouldn’t have an ugly baby. The rest I assumed would be OK…ten fingers, ten toes, you know? I’d seen mothers doting over their “ugly” babies (pointed head, swollen eyes, flat nose)and always thought they knew their babies were ugly and just faked it, hoping the ugly would go away. When Stephanie was born, I remember thinking “She’s beautiful! She’s perfect!” That’s when I realized every mother sees her baby as perfectly beautiful, no matter what she looks like to the world.

    Thanks for sharing part of your soul with us. <3March 1, 2014 – 11:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG I can’t believe you brought up ugly babies and love you so much for doing so. I, too, remember wondering whether people realized their babies were ugly!!! Guess we both were given lessons in that ugly no longer exists as of course we have the most beautiful amazingly gorgeous babies on the planet, right??? I mean Tucker and Stephanie are really really good looking!!! That cannot just be me or us, or maybe and who cares!!! 😀March 2, 2014 – 12:34 amReplyCancel

  • lizzy - muddle-headed mamma - It’s not often that I get to the end of a blogpost and feel completely lost for words and have no idea what to write in the comment box, but this is exactly how I feel now. This post was absolutely beautiful. You are such a gifted, honest writer and God could not have sent Tucker to a better woman to be his mum. xxMarch 2, 2014 – 9:41 amReplyCancel

  • allison - sniff sniff – this made me teary. With both of our pregnancies my ob offered genetic testing, etc., and we refused them all. After much discussion we realized that even if we found out something wasn’t “right” we wouldn’t do anything different, so it didn’t matter. No matter what tests showed us we knew that our baby was OUR BABY and he was loved so much. xoMarch 2, 2014 – 10:36 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allison – agree that our babies are ours and loved hugely. Thanks so much.March 2, 2014 – 5:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Courtney Conover - “I don’t want him to ever see a number on a piece of paper and assume anything about himself. I don’t want him to see a number on a piece of paper and give up…That I am the lucky one.”

    THIS. Powerful.

    Kristi…I love you. I just love you.March 2, 2014 – 1:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Jess - Kristi, he is such a darling little boy. What a blessing! I remember many years ago thinking that I never could handle a baby with Downs. Then, after years of trying to have a baby and then losing multiple pregnancies, I changed my tune. Once I got pregnant, I decided to forgo those tests. No matter what, we were keeping the baby and we would love her no matter what. Wonderful post. Thanks for sharing.March 2, 2014 – 2:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jess,
      Thank you so much and I know what you mean. I can’t believe that years ago I thought I’d not be able to or want to deal with anything being “wrong” with my baby. Now I know that no matter who are kids are, they’re perfectly them, and loved completely by us.March 2, 2014 – 5:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - This is so beautiful Kristi, and actually brought me to tears. It’s hard to fathom how much you will love them, until you feel them kick for the first time, or hold them in your arms. I get overwhelmed sometimes just thinking about it. I cry so hard when I see something happen to a child in the news, and once my kids said “why are you crying, you don’t even know that person?” Its hard to explain to them that you’re crying for the anguish another mother or father is feeling, because you can’t imagine anything worse. We just love so much, no matter what. Nothing could change that.March 2, 2014 – 3:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Michelle,
      I can’t handle hearing about anything happening to kids at all either. I can’t deal with it on the news, on facebook, or anywhere. I feel the same anguish over it and yeah, I suppose it’s impossible to know how much we’ll love our kids before actually becoming parents. Thanks much.March 2, 2014 – 5:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Angela McKeown @Momopolize - Oh my gosh Kristi! This post is amazing! Is THIS what you are reading at LTYM?? I’m guessing it’s not, but I can visualize you on stage saying every word of this with so much emotion. You rock, my dear!!March 2, 2014 – 11:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Angela, no, this is not what I’m reading as I just wrote it Thursday but I almost wish it was what I was reading!!! Maybe next year?? You rock, right back, friend.March 2, 2014 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - I love how you wrote this – the progression from before having a child – and the expectations of “perfect” life – to having Tucker and life adapting and loving him fiercely and – so naturally – wanting everything for him. While obviously no life is every “perfect” I know that yours comes with more challenge than you could have anticipated. And – looking back – it’s so easy to make absolute decisions when you aren’t actually faced with them. So don’t judge your former self too harshly.

    We have friends who over the past few months have had their son (a bit over a year now) run through a myriad of tests to determine if there is a developmental delay. They haven’t figured out what it is yet and I can’t imagine the stress. Sometimes when I read your blog – and this post is a great example – I think it will help me when I next see them so I’ll be able to listen well and possibly offer something (like your blog) to the conversation.March 3, 2014 – 12:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks so much, Louise. I love love love that you share it with your friends. Please let them know that if they want to talk, I’d be happy to speak on the phone as well. Sometimes, it helps just to talk to somebody who’s been through it. I’ve spoken to a few moms and even met a couple in person which is awesome.
      Thanks for reminding me to not pass too much judgement on my former self. It’s hard sometimes, though, ya know?March 3, 2014 – 7:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Amber Day Hicks - This post is wonderful! Your baby boy is phenomenal! Screw it!!! I don’t crecwhat they say, you are right, a momma and the fierce love is SO much more powerful than any measley diagnosis! Love this! XO! ~A~March 3, 2014 – 1:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much, Amber and I will agree with you that Tucker is phenomenal (awesome word by the way). Thanks for getting it!! xoxo right back at ya!March 3, 2014 – 7:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Emmy - LOVE this post. Love your honesty and love your perspective. It is so amazing how much life can teach us and help us grow as a person and that is an amazing beautiful thing.March 4, 2014 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you so much, and yes, life does teach us so much. And too much of it is beautiful to ignore.March 4, 2014 – 11:11 pmReplyCancel

  • A Morning Grouch - I’m sitting in a coffee shop trying not to look like a psycho emotional disaster so I’m holding back tears as I read this. I feel a huge connection with this – the fear of the unknown, of a “not perfect” child – and then once you are PREGNANT – not even officially a mother yet – the whole world changes. The WHOLE WORLD CHANGES. As a special ed teacher who is forced to talk in numbers and benchmarks sometimes this also strikes a nerve – know that so many of us feel the same way you do about your lovely child.March 4, 2014 – 2:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry about the coffee shop thing, but thank you so much for feeling such a connection to this. The whole world does really change when we get pregnant, see them on an ultrasound, and then, hold them, name them, stay up with them, worry for them, and finally, somewhere in there, realize who they actually are, aside from our dream of them. Thank you.March 4, 2014 – 11:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - I’ve thought and said some of the same things as you in my youth. And Lindsey had the same (or very close to the same) Apgar scores. We thought things were perfect. Until much later too. We are on a challenging unknown path–whether we like it or not. You’ve embraced it better than me. I think I ignored the doctors warnings for several years. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the diagnosis. Anyway, as always, another beautiful post. And I appreciate the honest way you write. It is so refreshing. p.s. you are right. This would have been perfect for Spread The Word To End The R Word day. But it was also perfect for the day you posted it.March 13, 2014 – 1:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Tina McGrevy - Great post!

    Oh, I hate to think of the things I used to say. It would be interesting to interview the pre-mom me…I’ve changed so much I actually forget my previous opinions on certain matters. (Maybe that’s a good thing!)October 24, 2014 – 7:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ha, Tina! Me, too! And I’m pretty sure that me forgetting most of what I used to think is a good thing, too!October 25, 2014 – 12:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Meredith - Such a beautiful post! We all have things that we say like this before we are mothers. I once said I was going to have 8 kids. That makes me laugh hysterically now. No way am I prepared to birth that many children, or would my sanity allow it. But, it sounds like you and Tucker were just meant to find each other for all the right reasons.January 15, 2015 – 10:23 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah @ Thank You Honey - As I read this a Bruno Mars’ song came ring in my ears… You are AMAZING just the way you Are… I don’t think I could have said it any better.January 15, 2015 – 2:05 pmReplyCancel

Have you ever thought about life’s turning points? About how different your life might be had you taken a different route, a different job, chosen a different country to live in?  Would your child be the same person had you had him earlier?  Married somebody else?  Grew up with a different family?  Would you be […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I saw “Awww” out loud to the Chief one. Love how you chose to finish your sentence and the Tucker picture that followed.June 7, 2013 – 11:29 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Kristi, such a beautiful post and so very true. We do have many moments that change and define us and loved how you took us from the beginning of your existence to this point in time. Just wonderful and thank you as always for linking up with us. Wishing you a wonderful weekend now!! 🙂June 7, 2013 – 11:35 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh my friend, I love that we both went serious with this one. I think it is great that you defined falling into forever love with Robert. And that we were in the wrong library. And about rescuing Chief–which I have an idea about by the way have you thought about getting a therapy dog for Tucker? That you could all love but that would be trained to be Tuck’s security. Then maybe you can pee with the door closed.

    You are the best mom and I just loved this post. You should put a Kerri favorite’s tab on your page 🙂June 7, 2013 – 11:35 amReplyCancel

  • Lori Lavender Luz - This is one of those gorgeous posts that makes me think and think long after I close the browser window.

    So many turning points. And so many serendipitous turns 🙂

    Thanks for the reminder to be present. I will take that with me into my routine today.June 7, 2013 – 11:36 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa Nelson - What a wonderful post Kristi!

    We all have roads that we travel, don’t we? We use the experiences to get further in this life. Not everything goes how it’s planned. That’s part of being human and alive – and not totally control of your own destiny. I can testify to that fact.

    However it goes, the road we end up on – is the right road for us. Rest assured that what you are doing now, is what you should be doing now.

    Have a fantastic weekend!June 7, 2013 – 12:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Daughter of Maat - I really loved this FTSF prompt, and I love reading everyone’s posts. You’re was especially awesome, and I agree, there are so many things that change us, it’s really hard to narrow it down to just one. We are the sum of all of our past moments.

    Despite my mistakes, I wouldn’t change a thing. 😀June 7, 2013 – 12:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Maggie Amada - Oh, Christi, this post says so much about you. I’m really glad that we met each other through these blog hops.

    Life is just full of good and bad moments. Our choices shape us as much as the things that happen to us, maybe more. I love how you view the world and your sense of humor and wonder at the challenges that you face each day and the gifts you’ve been granted.June 7, 2013 – 1:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate - I love how some of the turning points are big and some not as big. It really is all the moments that change us!June 7, 2013 – 1:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Anita @ Losing Austin - So glad I now know you just a little bit better by knowing more of the road you’ve traversed. I’ve thought about those very questions often, sometimes with fear of how close I came to making choices that would have taken me a different path that may not have led to these amazing boys I get to mom. And sometimes with guilt of the path I didn’t take that maybe would have kept my brother with us. But even then, that would have meant on missing out on so much I wouldn’t want to.

    xoxoJune 7, 2013 – 1:49 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - This is seriously beautiful writing. That’s all I have to say really. I loved reading it.June 7, 2013 – 2:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - So beautifully written…I didn’t participate in FTSF this week because I couldn’t think of just one turning point…and you are right — there are so many of them in our lives and that’s why I couldn’t pick just one. And the other reason I didn’t participate is I knew this post would take a lot of thought and well, I was in a lazy mood this week. And that photo at the end of the post? Just perfect.:)June 7, 2013 – 2:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for real. - That. Was. Amazing. I don’t even know what else to say. My eyes started filling with tears at some of the ones that resonated with me the most- “Not marrying the bad boy that I loved too much. ” Yep. And so many other. I’m going to stop now because I don’t want to ruin your perfect, beautiful post.June 7, 2013 – 3:40 pmReplyCancel

  • K - You have such an amazing way with words. This is spine-chillingly awesome. Thank you. xoxoJune 7, 2013 – 4:20 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - excellent post, wiwi*

    two things especially: Chief and the photo of your small lifeform on a path both real and metaphorical.

    *wish I wrote it**

    ** sorta, couldn’t include the reality based elements*** but the narrative the arch whatever the hell the rhetoricians**** call it.
    *** kinda can with Chief
    **** there actually is a ‘real’ word rhetorician*****
    ***** yes, I am disappointed.June 7, 2013 – 4:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Absolutely beautifully written, Kristi. I loved following you on this look back at your life until now. Thank you for sharing your journey with us – may the road ahead be filled with good things!June 7, 2013 – 5:00 pmReplyCancel

  • The Sadder But Wiser Girl - I love the line “realizing that we not only had the wrong parenting book, but that we were in the wrong library.” This was all wonderful, but that particularly resonated with me. Great FTSF!June 7, 2013 – 5:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - out one ear - Beautiful, Kristi. I want to be your next door neighbor and have tea with you in the morning.June 7, 2013 – 5:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - Chills and tears. You have such a way of capturing your emotion in your words. I’m in the middle of the crazy time in our house and all that dropped away as I read this.June 7, 2013 – 6:45 pmReplyCancel

  • karen - wow, I am in tears, you worded this so amazing and eloquently. You captured it beautifully, wrong book, wrong library…EXCELLENT CHOICE OF WORDS.

    yes, each road and path, makes us who we are today.June 7, 2013 – 9:32 pmReplyCancel

  • just JENNIFER - I once wrote a post titled The Road Not Taken after my favorite poem. I pinpointed a few places in my life where, looking back, I see I had come to a fork in the wood. Making different decisions at those times would have seriously altered my life path.

    I think it is very good to think on these things. Lovely post!June 7, 2013 – 10:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay - KRISTI–you are supposed to be a silly skank like I am. So what the hell is up with you taking my breath away, putting tears in my eyes with these beautiful posts? You are like an onion, my friend…many layers, and I love them all!June 7, 2013 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Sylvia - What a lovely post! You’ve experienced and been through a lot! Your many turning points that have led up to the blessed life you have now! I pray along with you that you all will have a long, healthy, and beautiful rest of your lives!June 7, 2013 – 11:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Dawn - Thank you for linking up with #FTSF this week. All of the moments you are talking about can definitely shape a person. I loved the WAY you posted. The layout was easy to read and we got to know A LOT about you. Thanks!June 7, 2013 – 11:57 pmReplyCancel

  • kelli - I just love this post. It is so genuine and beautifully written. Thank you for sharing your turning points with all of us!June 8, 2013 – 12:22 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie DeYoung - So many turning points go into a life. Like you, I couldn’t pick just one, which is why I wrote about something silly…this was beautiful.June 8, 2013 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

  • Priya - This is beautiful writing. Simple and yet something which everyone relates to. We all make mistakes and emerge stronger from them.June 8, 2013 – 1:09 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - This is a stunning post, Kristi. I can see the path of your life so clearly here, and somehow, in spite of all you’ve gone through, you don’t sound bitter or angry or…negative, really. You sound at peace and it’s transfixing. Thank you for sharing this.June 8, 2013 – 5:48 amReplyCancel

  • Mary-andering Creatively - I loved the format you selected. I feel like I need to go redo mine post now. Maybe I will in a few weeks. I just have so much going on and I am at another turning point too. Thanks for being so open and sharing.June 8, 2013 – 7:59 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Golden spoons - Kristi, this is just beautiful! I love the way you went all the way back to even before you were born. Beautiful, lovely post!June 8, 2013 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

  • catherine gacad - I am stunned by the beauty of your post. Thank you.June 8, 2013 – 1:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Okay you guys – this is again when I hate not having nested comments because each one of your amazingly awesomely excellent thoughts and encouragement means so very much to me. Thank you.
    —
    To Kenya,
    The Chief one got me, too…
    —-
    Janine,
    Thank you for hosting and I hope you have an excellent weekend as well.
    —
    Kerri,
    I actually have considered a therapy dog for Tucker but honestly am just not ready yet. I think it might be good for him – he’s recently decided that he’s scared of dogs, poor kid. 🙁
    —
    Lori,
    I need a daily reminder to be present. Thank you.June 8, 2013 – 7:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Lisa,
    You’re so right that not everything goes as planned and I do believe that most of the time, it becomes as it should be. The right road for us. I like that.
    —
    Daughter of Maat,
    Yes to being the sum of so many of our past moments! I wouldn’t change anything either.
    —
    Maggie,
    Cheers to life being full of both. And I’m really glad I met you, too. Was it from the FTSF? I thought I found you somewhere else but I can’t keep track of where I met everybody…
    —-
    Kate,
    Yes, all of the moments make us and bring us to where we are today, don’t they?
    —
    Anita,
    Oh I so hope you don’t go down the guilt path often. It must be so very frustrating not knowing what happened to Austin and I feel for you so much.
    —
    Yvonne,
    Thank you.
    —
    Emily,
    I can completely sympathize with being in a lazy mood this week! Plus, you must be busy with the new trampoline, right?June 8, 2013 – 7:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Stephanie,
    Thank you – cheers to us not marrying the bad boys.
    —
    K,
    Thank you so much.
    —
    Clark,
    As you know from my comment back on The Doctrine, I had to look rhetoricians up. Cool word although I know your version of it would have been better.
    —
    Dana,
    This was a really fun week to read. Everybody’s takes on it were so amazing and cool.
    —
    Sadder Sarah,
    Yeah, I thought you might like that line. I suppose it’s one that every parent who has ever had a kid and struggled with figuring out what’s going on has looked up and realized they’re in the wrong library.
    —
    Linda,
    I would LOVE if you were my next door neighbor and we could have tea together every morning. What a treat that would be.
    —
    Jean,
    Glad I took you away from the crazy in your house for a couple of minutes.June 8, 2013 – 7:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Karen,
    Thank you. The library line was one of my favorites as well.
    —
    Just Jen,
    I look forward to reading your post.
    —
    Shay,
    Trust me, I’m just a skank wearing an onion to try and get the skunky skank smell off.June 8, 2013 – 8:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - Wow, this is so beautiful. You totally moved me with this post. I love it! I love seeing all the twists and turns in your life and how eloquently you shared them. Loved this, Kristi!June 8, 2013 – 8:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Robbie - Very powerful. I hope you get your wish about life around the bend.June 8, 2013 – 9:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Tatum - oh man, really beautiful, Kristi. You are such an amazing writer…and person. It sounds like you gave yourself to each turning point. True living.June 8, 2013 – 10:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Melanie Chisnall - Such an interesting topic….the paths we take in life. I think about things like that sometimes. There are so many different roads I could have taken. But I’m happy with this one right now. I love your writing style and so glad I found you through FTSF today! Also loved reading about Chief. 🙂June 9, 2013 – 9:41 amReplyCancel

  • Misty @ Meet the Cottons - you are an amazing writer. love this post!June 9, 2013 – 9:47 amReplyCancel

  • Melissa@Home on Deranged - Embrace the tears as well as the laughter. That’s my favorite. Some days easier to do than others. But it’s just as important to remember the bad times as the good. Just don’t get lost in them.June 9, 2013 – 4:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Joy@icansaymama - Yes, there are so many small or big turning points in our lives. You said that so beautifully! Love your post! xoxoJune 10, 2013 – 3:57 amReplyCancel

  • Jen - Oh my gosh Kristi, this post is so awesome. Really. I love the way you put every single point in your life. I think about these things all the time, but it doesn’t matter does it? We wouldn’t change a minute because that’s how we got our amazing kids. You really are an amazing writer and mom. This post really shows how amazing you are. MWAH! TTTx10!June 11, 2013 – 10:44 amReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Those moments that deviated you from where you intended to go, you kept on walking. You opened your mind and heart to new experiences and evolved with them.
    Turning points are wonderful things whether good or bad because they create change and growth.
    This is beautiful.June 11, 2013 – 1:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Jennifer Lizza - Wow. There is really nothing about this post not to love. You have captured the moments we have all gone through to get us to where we are. It’s amazing how the small moments in our lives create the big beautiful picture we call life. I think this is in my top 5 favorite posts of yours. 🙂June 11, 2013 – 3:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - Wow! I’m hear crying, rejoicing, and in awe of everything you’ve been through. Life’s great like that and I sometimes wonder what life might’ve been if I took another route. Thanks so much for sharing your post with us @ My Favorite Posts SHOW OFF Weekend Blog Party!

    Jessica
    The Wondering BrainJune 13, 2013 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - You guys. Sorry I don’t have nested comments. Thank you so very much for all of your awesomely kind amazing wonderful words and selves. You people are why I blog.June 14, 2013 – 9:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Jak - This was a great post! So beautiful and heartfelt. I like your method/style of listing them out. Not sure how to explain that really, but I know what I’m talking about.
    –
    I particularly liked the “wrong parenting book/library” part.
    –
    There are definitely many defining moments in life that shape us. They are continual as we learn and grow.
    –
    I don’t think I’ve ever contemplated where I’d be, or who I would be if certain things hadn’t occurred/been experienced. Sometimes when I specifically talk about an event I suppose I do. It’s fresh on the mind then and when reminiscing I feel it’s hard to avoid the “what if”s. At least for me.
    –
    Again, great post! Some of these recent, deeper posts fellow bloggers are writing inspire me to finally touch base on some of the more neglected/buried aspects of my past on my blog.
    –
    Jak at The Cryton Chronicles & Dreams in the Shade of InkJune 18, 2013 – 9:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Crystal - This was such a beautiful post! I’m crying! You have an amazing gift for writing. Thank you SO MUCH for linking this up at LOBS. I’m honored. 🙂July 21, 2013 – 12:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Bonnie a.k.a. LadyBlogger - What a beautiful post, thank you. Saw you on Out One Ear…and came by to read your post!

    I blog about education, kids, parenting and the business of blogging. Come visit me at http://ladyblogger.net!September 15, 2013 – 11:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Lillian Connelly - It’s amazing to follow the trajectory of our own lives sometimes. To list where we have been and really examine how it brought us all today. Whenever I do that I have so much gratitude for my life…bumps and all.

    Great post!October 3, 2014 – 10:50 amReplyCancel

If I could live anywhere in the world, I’m not sure where I’d choose. The caves and snow of the mountains of Colorado? So close to the ocean that each morning its scent would bring me back to earth before hunger and here? If I could live anywhere, I’d like to live in The Land of […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Emily - Beautiful and as you know, couldn’t agree more. I’ve heard kids say they “hate” my son simply because he was different…thankfully, the empathy factor grows as kids mature and now no kid would say something like that to my son, even if they thought it. Of course his imposing 6 foot 6 height may have something to do with that too….:) I want to live in that same land of wonder and empathy…I hope we all get there soon!April 11, 2013 – 11:15 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Aw thanks, Emily! And Tucker, too, will likely be very tall…which is sort of bad now as when he gets stressed, he’s a head taller than all the other kids. But will be a good thing later. When we did the whole “how tall will your kid be” test at age two, they predicted 6’6″. My husband is 6’3″. I’m only 5’6″. So who knows. But everybody thinks he’s five or six now…so probably he’ll have the same advantage your amazing dude 1 has. And UGH to the years when I’ll have to hear “hate” when it comes to my kid. Your dude is lucky to have you as a mom. Maybe if all of us – you and me to start – want to live in the land of empathy and wonder…we could possibly get there? Maybe…April 11, 2013 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Shay - Okay, excuse me, WARN me next time you’re going to make me cry! Seriously, I got tears in my eyes reading this. Such powerful writing, and I couldn’t agree more. Thank you!!April 11, 2013 – 11:25 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - I think I love you. And sorry.April 11, 2013 – 11:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Angela McKeown @Momopolize - Wonderful, wonderful post!April 11, 2013 – 11:57 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thank you. Huge. Thanks. You are awesome.April 12, 2013 – 12:23 amReplyCancel

  • Joy - I love his picture! <3

    And I love that the places where you and I would want to live are so alike! Yay! xoxoApril 12, 2013 – 5:10 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Joy, thank you. And I just read yours and I suppose great minds think alike! Kerri’s place was fictional too. 😀April 12, 2013 – 8:38 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Beautiful BEEEEEEYOUTIFULL post Tucker’s mom. This line made my nose burn – the kind where you hold back tears “To try and make eye contact with the boy who makes you uncomfortable. To say hi. To give his tired mom a smile.” To that, I say I absolutely will. I just love “your place”.

    And I’m so proud of you for having your post up. Mine is stillI rattling in the corners of my brain. Now, I wasn’t sure if you were on the toilet cause you wanted some quite time to think about this post or you actually have the flu. So if you ARE sick, I hope you feel better.April 12, 2013 – 6:50 amReplyCancel

    • admin - No, not sick today…and thank you. I actually wasn’t going to write this until tonight (Friday) but it just sort of happened. And THANK YOU.April 12, 2013 – 8:40 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Wow, this was perfectly said Kristy and I agree please warm me when you are going to make me cry this early in the morning. And I will gladly live with you in this world, because it sounds absolutely perfect. Also, loved the picture of Tucker, he is a beautiful little boy!! Thank you for linking this one up with us and am sharing this one (I have to, because it is truly so perfect).April 12, 2013 – 7:24 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Aw thank you so so much. I appreciate the share. A lot.April 12, 2013 – 8:40 amReplyCancel

  • clark - Nice.

    “…With how we choose to spend the next five minutes. ”

    That this is what makes the internet one of the more amazing things to come out of all the efforts of humankind… it is the possibility of the window you have just drawn in my computer on my desk in my home. (and, yes, no …I know that virtual reality is not real reality, but my world (the one outside) is bigger, more complete than it was when I sat down here this morning.)April 12, 2013 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Clark, yay to all of our worlds getting bigger and more complete. Well said.April 12, 2013 – 8:41 amReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for real. - I had no idea this was coming, after the hilarious 5 minutes on the toilet bit. Your well runs deep, my friend. I’m not sure if it is possible to top this brilliant post. (Certainly my whiney I want to live on a beach crap didn’t even come close!) Please tell me you didn’t just pull this out of your hiney. This has to be a months and months in the making post because it is that brilliant.April 12, 2013 – 9:10 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Aw, friend, you are too kind and we both know I will never ever be organized enough to spend months and months on a post 😉
      And thank you.April 12, 2013 – 5:22 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh my friend, even though I was warned I still have goosebumps. The whole time reading this I was thinking I want to be your neighbor in this world you envisioned. Just to learn that I CAN live in the world of empathy and wonder if I just open my heart.

    PS–I love, love, love Tucker’s school picture.April 12, 2013 – 9:14 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Kerri! Thank you so much dear friend. Amazing how similar yours, Joy’s and my worlds are for this prompt. Hm. I wonder why? Oh right. And thank you so much. You are awesome.April 12, 2013 – 5:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Mariana - Beautiful, hopefully we will get to that point where people see difference as a negative. Thats what makes everyone unique.April 12, 2013 – 9:18 amReplyCancel

    • admin - I hope so too. Thank you so much for your kind comment.April 12, 2013 – 5:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Limefreckle - I LOVE that picture! I want to move to that land too…..wish more people had the attitude that differences shouldn’t be such a big deal. I had no idea what a boxed in world we really live in, until I had my autistic son!April 12, 2013 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Let’s all move there! And yeah, autism will broaden a world pretty quickly, won’t it? Thank you for visiting and for commenting. I appreciate it.April 12, 2013 – 5:24 pmReplyCancel

  • nothingbythebook - So sweet. What a lovely way to start my morning…
    Thank you.April 12, 2013 – 9:54 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Thank you! Huge.April 12, 2013 – 5:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Shell - This is so, so lovely. I want to live in that land, too!April 12, 2013 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Can we charter a plane and all go? A magical ninee to carry us to a magical land.April 12, 2013 – 5:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Jen - YOU PROMISED! And now it’s Sophie’s Choice for you my friend! That was truly beautiful, and I understand very deeply how much a place like that would be so wonderful. Sometimes with my own boy it’s hard to be in that place when the stresses and frustrations have reached a peak. And it doesn’t help when so much of that stress is because of other people, and how they interact/relate to your child. But you know you can live there. You can live there all of the time and screw the people who don’t. Because all that matters to Tucker, right now, is you. And I see that light in my son’s eyes, when I forget everything else, he shines so bright, like “mommy is HERE with me” not in her head somewhere. We should all live with you there. The end.April 12, 2013 – 10:26 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Sorry. But I didn’t think it’d make anybody cry except me. For real. And I know exactly what you mean about seeing the light in your son’s eyes when he’s so excited that MOMMY IS HERE with him. Yes, we most definitely should all live there. Let’s start making our travel plans!April 12, 2013 – 5:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle Liew - I too, would love to live in a land of empathy and wonder where people can accept me as I am. Well. And beautifully said!!April 12, 2013 – 11:46 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Michelle, I would like that very much for all of us. And you know what? Talking about not feeling accepted helps people realize they need to accept. So let’s keep telling the world that it needs empathy and wonder and maybe we’ll eventually get there. April 12, 2013 – 5:31 pmReplyCancel

      • Michelle Liew - Yes!April 13, 2013 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

        • Michelle Liew - If we can all take the step to be more empathetic to each other instead of focusing on ourselves…we’ll reach that land of empathy and wonder1April 13, 2013 – 12:26 amReplyCancel

          • Kristi - From your lips, friend. From your lips. A lesson I need myself sometimes, too. Thanks huge for the comments. <3April 13, 2013 – 12:47 am

  • Melissa S. - First off, he is rockin’ that hair cut!! Fer real! Do you think it’s too early to set our kids up on dates??
    Second, I am trying to live in the land of empathy and wonder. I’m trying to learn not to judge others and jump to conclusions and just let my kids be kids, without imposing weird ass societal constraints on them that make no sense. It’s a very judgy world out there, my friend, and the ship only turns around at a very slow speed. But maybe, just maybe, our drop in the bucket will start a waterfall.
    love you!April 12, 2013 – 11:56 amReplyCancel

    • admin - Melissa, it’s definitely not too early to start setting them up on dates but I have to warn you that he has an IRL lovie and also, Kerri’s daughter Boo (Undiagnosed but we are okay with that blog) has expressed interest as well 😉
      You are so right that it is a highly judgy world out there. And I love the expression that a drop in the bucket can start a waterfall. Awesome stuff and you know I love you back!April 12, 2013 – 5:35 pmReplyCancel

  • just JENNIFER - This is so very beautiful. Fantastic! Couldn’t agree more. And your son looks totally fine to me in his photo. 🙂April 12, 2013 – 12:02 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thank you so much just Jennifer!April 12, 2013 – 5:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Maggie Amada - Love the picture of Tucker. He does seem mischievous and his mussed hair is awesome. I can just picture him being a heartbreaker some day. To test out the theory, I showed the picture to Isa (now four) and she said: “He looks nice. When I grow taller, I think he’s going to be my boyfriend.”

    I think her father will be coming after your son with a shotgun in the not-too-far-off future.
    🙂April 12, 2013 – 12:50 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Maggie, glad you see the mischievous side of him too. And yeah, I love his hair like that! YAY to Isa wanting him to be her boyfriend. So cool! Bad news about her father though. Hmmm.April 12, 2013 – 5:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Well, this world already exists, because you see things in this beautiful way. In writing about it, you are inviting others into this world too. It’s a gift for us all.

    P.S. I saw this picture on FB before reading the post. My only thought was “what a great picture of Tucker!”April 12, 2013 – 12:51 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - So relieved to hear that your thought was “what a great picture!” Thank you for this awesome comment. I appreciate it.April 12, 2013 – 5:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - What a magical place it would be… (love the pic by the way). 🙂April 12, 2013 – 1:47 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thank you!April 12, 2013 – 5:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - Wonderful post. I would like to live there, too. PS: All I see in that picture is one adorable little boy. 🙂April 12, 2013 – 2:03 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Aw thanks Jessica!April 12, 2013 – 5:38 pmReplyCancel

  • henriette - Did you get my message, we are on girl! Pizza and wine! You don’t have to post this comment! 😉
    And by the way, when I look at the picture I see mischievousness and happiness-and which boy wouldn’t be happy having the best, loving, caring momma in the world?! Boy knows he’s blessed and so are you!April 12, 2013 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - You are the coolest ever and I’m totally posting this comment. Because LOOK WORLD I have an in real life friend! And she wants to have pizza and wine with me! And she is awesome! 😀April 12, 2013 – 5:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - What a great post. I’m so happy I linked up today and didn’t overlook your post. I’m SO with you on our society being characterized by lack of empathy and wonder.

    Earlier today I stumbled upon a post (which is now one of the 37 open tabs on my computer) that I am hoping to read later: http://www.parents.com/blogs/goodyblog/2013/04/what-parents-of-kids-without-autism-cant-understand/?socsrc=pmmtw

    I usually try to put myself in other people’s shoes but sometimes it’s more difficult having no point of reference. Writing the post about miscarriage brought back memories about people wanting to be helpful but saying all the wrong things, simply for lack of experience. When I came across this article I realized there is probably so much I don’t understand about being a parent to an autistic or possibly autistic child. I’m still going to read the article, but after reading your post I already feel like I understand a little better.

    His photo melts my heart. Little boys really get to me 🙂April 12, 2013 – 3:28 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Katia, I actually had to work today so I need to catch up on everybody’s FTSF entries. I got to a few last night and really look forward to reading yours. Thanks also for the link to the other article. I appreciate it.
      And wow, it makes me so happy that this post makes you feel like you can understand a little better! And little boys ARE pretty darn awesome.April 12, 2013 – 5:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - If I could move anywhere in the world, this Land is where I’d want to be. And I’d want you to be President. Seriously, lovely piece and something we should all strive to create, everywhere and always.April 12, 2013 – 4:08 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Dana, I get to be President? How wonderfully cool! We should strive to create a world like this – you’re so right. Thanks huge for the sweet comment.April 12, 2013 – 5:42 pmReplyCancel

  • wendy - What a handsome, magical boy and what a beautiful piece. Thanks for sharing. Sending you a cyber smile from Chicago.April 12, 2013 – 5:20 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Thanks, Wendy! You are awesome for coming over to comment! And sending you a cyber smile right back from DC metro.April 12, 2013 – 5:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean Heff - This is a lovely post and I agree with your sentiments. YOU are helping me see life through your eyes, through your son’s eyes, which will help others too…which will get us closer to your world of empathy and wonder.
    Also, and this is so shallow compared to what I just said…
    You have 100% mastered boy-hair. I’m impressed and still trying to figure it out for my son.April 12, 2013 – 7:28 pmReplyCancel

    • admin - Aw, thank you Jean! Maybe we will get closer to empathy and wonder…here’s hoping.
      Oh and I love that you jumped to HAIR because Tucker’s hair rocks. I use Aquaphor. It doesn’t last long but I don’t want to use some actual real hair product in his hair. When I dropped him off at school for this picture day, I asked his teacher to run her hand through his hair to be sure it was sticking up. She remembered and that’s one more reason why she is awesome. 😀April 12, 2013 – 7:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Daphne - No. The answer to your question is no. His picture doesn’t look like autism, or delayed, or different. He looks like a well-loved, well-adjusted, and yes, appropriately mischievous little boy. And it wasn’t your eloquent words that made me cry, it was the picture of your beautiful little boy!April 12, 2013 – 9:13 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Thank you. Thank you so much. He is well-loved but it’s so easy to doubt our first reactions, isn’t it? And aw, MWAH to you crying over his beautiful picture.April 13, 2013 – 12:42 amReplyCancel

  • that cynking feeling - While I can certainly appreciate this post because I also have an autistic son, what makes this exceptional is that your land is one for everyone. It’s not just about autism or disabilities. You’ve painted the picture of a land where we worry less about differences except in how those differences enrich our lives.April 12, 2013 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - One thing I’ve noticed about having a son on the autism spectrum is that it’s made me more empathetic to ALL parents. While I cannot personally understand what it’s like to have a child unable to walk, or see, or (fill in the blank), I can understand that none of us have the child we imagined having when we were 8 years old and still believed that life was within our control. But you know what? We all love our kids, no matter what. And we all just want acceptance. And empathy. And wonder. And a smile, sometimes.
      Thanks so much for your comment!April 13, 2013 – 12:44 amReplyCancel

  • Clara-Leigh - SO well put!!!!!! THANK YOU for taking us to the heart of the matter…….that it is a state of mind we’d rather live in, not necessarily always a physical place!!!!! Beautiful post!! You inspired me to go into our weekend with no caregiver for our SN son with an open mind and heart to seeing things through his perfect eyes!!!April 13, 2013 – 12:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - YAY for finding inspiration in unlikely places. I hope that I, too, remember to go into this weekend without anxiety, or annoyance, or worry, or fear. I want to remember what’s important. I wrote this for me, too. And thanks for the comment!April 13, 2013 – 12:46 amReplyCancel

  • Shay - I replied to you on my blog, but I wanted to make sure I did it here, too: I looooooove you!! 🙂April 13, 2013 – 2:04 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - EEEP I looooooooooove you right back!April 13, 2013 – 9:21 amReplyCancel

  • Terrye - That would be a wonderful place to live all the time. I was watching Sunday Housecall on Foxnews last Sunday because they were discussing break throughs in autism. Dr. David Samadi said that eventually, they will unlock the secrets to autism, but until then, every parent needs to teach their children to accept, embrace and empathize with these special kids. I thought that was BRILLIANT and I had tears. It’s a movement that is starting to form like clouds on the horizon and I’m praying for the rain.April 13, 2013 – 3:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Terrye,
      Melting at the sentence “form like clouds on the horizon and I’m praying for the rain.” Awesome. Cheers to every parent teaching their children to accept, embrace and empathize. Truly brilliant. Thanks so much for the comment.April 13, 2013 – 4:59 pmReplyCancel

      • Terrye - It is my pleasure, my friend. Keep up the call for empathy. 😉April 13, 2013 – 5:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Vashti Quiroz-Vega - You made me cry! Powerful post. Thank you.April 14, 2013 – 6:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Thank YOU for visiting and commenting. I really appreciate it.April 14, 2013 – 9:00 pmReplyCancel

  • mombo - what a talented writer you are – inspiring, uplifting, and moving. You’re so wonderful, sweet one! xoxoApril 14, 2013 – 8:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Aw shucks. Thank YOU awesome one. A lot. <3April 14, 2013 – 9:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - What a cute, adorable picture!!! This is beautiful, Kristi. I love it! I, too, want to live in that world – The Land of Empathy and Wonder. Sounds like Heaven! 🙂April 14, 2013 – 9:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Thanks Kate. And thanks for the comment. I appreciate it. Huge.April 14, 2013 – 9:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Sheri - That’s definitely not a picture of autism. That’s a handsome guy right there! For sure mischievous! With the forest-y background and the cool spiked hair he reminds me of a lost boy from Peter Pan. (My nephew is on a Peter Pan kick, lol) I just came across your blog, I love it! Thanks for sharing. Hi to Tucker!April 16, 2013 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - I love the lost boy from Peter Pan reference! Thank you so much for your comment, I really appreciate the visit. And hi back from both me and Tucker 😀April 16, 2013 – 4:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Alicia - Lost In Holland - Oh that adorable little FACE!! What an amazing post. I was deeply moved by it – thank you for writing this and reminding us all.April 17, 2013 – 6:54 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Thanks so much, Alicia! Hopefully, we’ll ALL remember more often that the world really is full of empathy and wonder and that it starts with us all at home.April 17, 2013 – 7:54 amReplyCancel

  • Julie Chenell DeNeen - Looking through all the comments and the shares, you touched a nerve with this post. Fantastic and beautiful!April 17, 2013 – 8:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - Aw, thanks, Julie. Too bad I can’t do this all the time. I actually get jealous of the me who writes the better stuff.April 17, 2013 – 9:47 amReplyCancel

  • K - Seriously, I am in love with this post. I can’t even think of the words to describe how much this moved me. I want the entire world to be The Land of Empathy and Wonder. This was so beautifully written and thank you so much for sharing. I am bookmarking this so I can read it again whenever the “real world” gets me down!April 17, 2013 – 4:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi - K my friend, thank you. Thank you. I appreciate the comment and I want us all to strive to live in a world of Empathy and Wonder. It’s really where we all belong.April 17, 2013 – 10:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Anita @ Losing Austin - Love his sweet photo full of mischievous wonder. My sweet 9 year old needs to move to that land with me- he’s a typical child, no spectrum. But kids are mean for any 1000 number of reasons on any given day, and it breaks my heart. Thankful he has friends and adults to love on him all around him. But still would love that land…April 29, 2013 – 2:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Anita,
    Kids are mean sometimes and it breaks my heart, too 🙁
    I’d love that land as well. Let’s make it happen! It starts with one right?April 29, 2013 – 5:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Rorybore - beautifully written. And yes, it sounds like a wonderful land and one we can absolutely create.
    LOVE his picture. Love it.May 1, 2013 – 12:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Rorybore,
    Thank you. Help me to create it.May 1, 2013 – 10:41 pmReplyCancel

  • Ellen S. - I so love this, and couldn’t agree more. Hopefully, we are all encouraging that empathy and understanding when we write about our kids and show the world their awesome-ness, and all the abilities in their disability.May 12, 2013 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - Ellen.
    An honor, that you are here. Thank you. And I, too, hope that empathy and understanding is being encouraged everywhere.May 12, 2013 – 11:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Jak - Such a moving post, Kristi *hug*

    I’m just starting to investigate this Our Land series I saw Considerer mention. I’ll have to visit a handful of blogs I’ve neglected far too long before delving in head first, but all of this sounds great!

    That picture is awesome. He looks very mischievous there lol

    It would be so wonderful to live in the world/land you paint the picture to, and hopefully overtime it can be built literally. One step at a time.

    Jak at The Cryton Chronicles & Dreams in the Shade of InkJune 27, 2013 – 4:10 amReplyCancel

  • Denise - I wish we went to the same playground. My 7 year old plays with EVERYBODY, he doesn’t give a rat’s booty if the kids on the playground are girls, boys, older, younger, white, black or purple. He just wants to play. I hope he never loses that.September 10, 2014 – 10:21 amReplyCancel

This is the worst year ever but also, we have hope

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Allie Smith - Kristi, in all my years, I don’t think I ever read your account of 911. I think this year, it’s hitting all of us pretty hard. I watch Harry Smith (who always makes me cry) on Friday morning before work and just lost it. That morning, I was home, watching the Today Show, and B&H were onlu 9 months old. Eventually, when the coveergae became intense, I moved them to the master bedroom and put them in from of Baby Einstein, like all day. My best friend was on a plane, on her way to NYC, and I was freaking out. She was diverted to Charlette, pregnant with her 2nd child, and it took her a week to get home. I will never forget. And I do miss the empathy, tolerance, love, and grief (which was from love not anger like nowadays) of those days. How freaking sad is that?September 13, 2020 – 6:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I don’t think I’ve ever written about it before. In fact, I wasn’t planning on writing about it for this but it just kinda happened. OMG to B&H being 9 months old and of course they were in front of Baby Einstein, all day. Poor mama! Yikes. (I kinda miss the Baby Einstein theme song). I miss all of the ways in which we came together back then. Today, it all feels so different with COVID and everything. Our horrible “president.” Gah. It’s super sad.September 15, 2020 – 9:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Celia - I had moved to my current city in February 2001. In June the same year, my dad and I spent a week in Washington, D.C., seeing almost everything there was to see, and even toured the Pentagon. When my grandfather, who lived next door, came over on September 11th and told me that a plane had hit one of the towers, I was in disbelief. I still am. I went back to Washington, D.C., again in October 2003, this time to attend a military funeral for a veteran whose remains had been recovered thirty-five years after he was killed in action. The whole trip had a completely different vibe than the previous one, and not just because of the reason for the visit. There’s something jarring about seeing a military tank parked underneath a bridge near the airport as you’re headed to your hotel! It was odd driving by the Pentagon, which was still under repair as far as I remember. One thing I do remember is that people were still kind, caring, giving. I miss how we were as a country then.September 13, 2020 – 12:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh wow, what an experience to have been in DC before and after, and seeing the tank. Wow. I do remember how kind and gentle we each were with one another then, and wish I felt like we were being that way with one another today. I miss it, too.September 15, 2020 – 9:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - The book I’m currently reading takes place around September 11th and it is reminding me how close I was that day – enough to see the smoke in the sky and to have a boyfriend who worked in the WTC but WAS LATE THAT DAY.

    And I miss blogging conventions but have been doing some virtual ones and have been loving the swag! So there’s that.

    So much hope and dread for this fall, huh? I feel it all.September 14, 2020 – 2:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG to having a boyfriend who was late that day. That’s terrifying and something you’ll probably never forget. What virtual blogging conventions have you been doing? I’ve had a hard time feeling as connected. Maybe I need something like that.September 15, 2020 – 9:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Aw, Kristi, I have lived in NY all my life and 9-11-2001 was a surreal day living in the state on that day. I had gone back to school to become a teacher back then. On the actual day, I was driving to school and had the radio on. I truly thought when they were talking about this that it was part of a segment the local radio station did that was like punked but on the radio. Only when I got to school and a classmate had his mom call him on his primitive cell phone (the early day of mobile phones) to alert him did I realize that it wasn’t. The hours and days after are still a bit of a blur to me. But one thing, I can say is that the goodwill felt for all Americans back then was genuine and made me proud to be an American and New Yorker. Now, though with the MAGA a**shat squatting in the Whitehouse American goodwill is at an all-time low around the globe and for a good reason. All I know is the other night I made sure that my voter registration is all up-to-date and will be voting in person come hell or high waters to vote for Biden/Harris to get rid of the scum of the earth that has tainted violated this country for the last almost 4 years. Because we definitely need to do better for all in this country now more than ever. Hugs and here is to better for all of us now <3September 15, 2020 – 10:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s amazing what your experience was, Janine. I can’t believe actually being nearby when it happened. You’re right about the goodwill and love each of us held was pure and isn’t the case now with stupid MAGA. Ugh. Here’s to voting no matter what. And to huge hugs and friends like you. <3September 15, 2020 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

In March, we were mourning a canceled Disneyland and Universal trip for spring break. “They’re saying it’ll just be a few weeks,” we said. We waited for the pandemic to pass. Celebrated spring break at home. Did everything at home. Waited for life to be more like what we were used to with busy schedules, […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Emily - Best cake ever! Xo (happy birthday again!)August 29, 2020 – 5:55 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - First off, Happy birthday and I whole-heartly agree with the cake’s message! That said, you nailed it and exactly where we are at and school starts this week where my kids will be logging on online as we chose full remote/virtual for the first trimister/semester at least. We took Emma for her 11 year old check up a few days ago and her pediatrician pretty much said all local school if they aren’t will be remote by November (he believes) in our local area. So, looks like we are most definitely not there yet and just cannot believe it. Hugs and so much love, my friend <3August 30, 2020 – 8:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Much love back to you, Janine. And I agree about schools going virtual if they’re in person by November. Maybe even sooner, really. I’m hopeful for the hybrid option in two more weeks, as learning online is really HARD, and Tucker struggles with paying attention for so long, but also, the schools I know that are already open 100% have had illnesses and whether it’s covid or other, they’re in quarantine, and I expect it’ll happen more and more. Hang in there!August 30, 2020 – 8:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Mardra Sikora - (writes comment, deltes it. writes comment – deletes it.)
    SO anyway – Yeah. We ar enot there yet and who knows?!?
    Also balancing between the panic, the unwellnes of it all, and yet also being INCredibly grateful for what we do have. So weird. Love you. – MardraAugust 30, 2020 – 8:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Love you too, Mardra! And yeah, we’re not there yet. The panic is real, but so is the gratitude on having what we have. It’s a lot. The panic and the gratitude, I suppose. xoAugust 30, 2020 – 8:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - haha, it takes a good friend to make a cake with obscenities on it. I should know – I’ve given them and received them.
    AIDS took awhile.. but there was more at hand there, and some terrible viewpoints. Also, the way you contract it is so different that it made a really beautiful thing seem terrifying to many of us.. nearly forever. I got tested for it with each pregnancy!
    And COVID makes breathing terrifying. Ugh. F them all!September 1, 2020 – 6:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LOL right? And yeah, in some ways, AIDS was more scary because it was so new and unknown, but in my opinion, COVID is worse NOW because it’s airborne. Or maybe just because it’s here now and while I know AIDS is still a huge issue, people with HIV have some hope with drugs and more acceptance now that we know more. I wish we knew more already about COVID. Gah. F them all for sure. xoxoSeptember 10, 2020 – 8:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie Smith - I thought you were doing the hybrid back to school? We’ve been back three weeks and its been…dare I say it…okay. Had a rough start with Bear – but that was all administrative and I want a little “Karen” on the special Ed department chair – still stewing, but he’s happy, and i guess that’s all that counts.

    We have fall break in 2 weeks (seriously), and i am hitting to road. I haven’t left this town in a year, not joking. I’m going to see family in New Hampshire and then checking on my Aunt in Delaware. Little weird to call hotels and ask if we’re allowed to check in (in some states we’re not, because of our Governor, which I get). I don’t think the second wave has hit yet, so I want to do some family maintenance before it does.September 2, 2020 – 8:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey Allie! So we are doing hybrid back to school but not until next week. There have been three weeks of synchronous learning online. It hasn’t been pretty. Sorry about the rough start with Bear. LOL to going “Karen” on the special ed chair – been there and done that. In fact, when Tucker’s speech person last semester was like “He graduated!” I was all. “UM.” She said that there were so many more kids with more severe needs to focus on. I told her “Sounds to me like you simply need more speech pathologists.” She obviously isn’t my number one fan now, but he’s in 6th grade (which is middle school here) and we’ve got a new team, and they aren’t making changes during the uncertainty, so I guess we’re good for now. H e went from a ton of hours in Fairfax County to speech and 15 minutes with the psych for anxiety here. At least he still gets that part. I had read how difficult it is to get services in other places and didn’t realize how truly lucky we were to have them offer things we didn’t even need back then. Anyway! Sorry for the long reply (and delay). I’m glad you’re doing some traveling. It’ll fuel your heart, I know. Hugs and love.September 10, 2020 – 8:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Nancy Burton Wolfe - “But mostly, 11 year olds and every year olds weren’t prepared for this.” So, so, SO true. And I don’t think there was any way to prepare. Thinking of you fondly, as you and your little big guy work on keeping his life balanced and rich and I have no doubt you will… xoxox
    And, darn it! I just wrote a post of my own, but the window closed before I could link it. If you are interested, please find me at https://livingcenter.me/2020/08/31/there-and-here/September 10, 2020 – 8:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank you for your thoughts and encouragement. It means a lot. Also, your link came through! I apologize for the delay – my husband’s brother was here for a visit, and I slacked off on my FTSF duties. I’m heading to your post now and appreciate you participation!! 🙂September 10, 2020 – 8:47 pmReplyCancel

Who isn’t burned out right now? If we’re not stressing about how our kids (my kid, anyway) will learn online with accountability (!) for seven hours at a time, it’s wondering whether it’s okay to have family and close friends over for a backyard cookout. Whether outdoor ice cream shops are safe-ish, and whether a […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Zoe - Love you! HAPPY BIRTHDAY! My world would be less without you in it. Thankin’ my lucky stars! 💜August 22, 2020 – 12:42 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - That’s maybe the nicest thing anybody’s ever said to me. Love you. And thank you. I’m so glad you’re in my world.August 24, 2020 – 10:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G Smith - Kristi, I have to say, reading this was kind of depressing. LOL. I could totally write this one, but afraid I’d need an Ativan after – LOL. I’m sorry about the losses, so sorry. And I too miss my younger self who was less anxious. I’ve had a wild couple weeks. I’m so tired, and last night I went to bed at 9! Perhaps after a cup of coffee, I’ll have it in me to cobble something together…August 22, 2020 – 5:26 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry, Allie. I almost didn’t post but then was like “whatever, nobody reads it anyway,” but then was like “UGH” and well, a couple glasses of wine made me post it and put in the more positive ending. It’s rough there though. Everywhere. xoxoAugust 24, 2020 – 10:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara Bowman - I did watch enough to glimpse you! Leave it to kids to point out weight loss and weight gain.

    I can’t believe it’s been so long since they passed. I remember that well. Way too soon.

    And seriously I’m going to quote John Mayer who said something like that the novelty of the novelty of this pandemic has worn off. Indeed it has.August 25, 2020 – 2:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG I hadn’t heard that quote about the novelty of the novelty of this pandemic having worn off. Yup. That, exactly.August 28, 2020 – 8:32 pmReplyCancel

  • huay9 - Hi friends, how is everything, and what you desire to say regarding this
    piece of writing, in my view its in fact remarkable
    for me.September 13, 2020 – 11:58 amReplyCancel

  • Alberto - I drop ɑ leavе a resρonsе each time I like a post on a site oor if I have somethin to contriƅute to the
    discussion. Usually it’s triggered by thee passion communicated in the post I looked at.
    And after this article Pandemic Burnout, Celebrating Life and Ηonoring Loss –
    Finding Ninee. I was actually excited enough to ɗroⲣ a thought 🙂 I do have a few qսestions for you іf it’s
    allright. Is itt ony me or do somе of these remarks appear liкe they are left by brain dead
    visitors? 😛 And, if you are ᴡriting on ther online
    sites, I’d like to keep up with anything new you have tto post.
    Would you list alⅼ of all your shared
    pzges lije your twitter feed, Faceboоk page or
    linkedіn profile?October 28, 2020 – 1:48 pmReplyCancel

My son builds worlds in Minecraft and I’m jealous. He’s got this world where the non-player-characters (NPC) are on virtual reality headsets, an annoyed worker who is the employee of the month, and they can pretty much fly and travel to wherever. Teleport even. I wish I could teleport. I want to travel. Wanderlust, Traveling, […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Debi - I’m jealous of all the beautiful places you can go nearby but also sad for you about the adventures you’re missing. Years ago, Sammi’s dietary restrictions meant traveling was impossible, and the idea of having to live like that indefinitely was scary for me. Now here we are, all in the same boat. (Except, of course, boats have to stay small now – no cruise ships!)

    Good luck in your first week of real remote learning, Tucker! Sammi’s right there with you. Well, not THERE…August 15, 2020 – 6:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for the luck in e-learning! I’m so sad for all of us, and middle school and high school rely so much on friendships… but also? There’s something about being together. Although I do wish we were going more places. Hugs to you and Sammi! I hope she finds friends and laughter in her new screen-only experiences! I hope we all do, actually.August 16, 2020 – 10:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Book that Dark Sky trip! It’s easy for me to become totally unmotivated to plan anything given the pandemic, but once I did plan a trip it did wonders for my mental state. I wouldn’t miss the DC area either, but I do miss you! I hope Tucker can find a bit of normal in schooling this year – I feel lucky that I don’t have a school-aged child right now. No easy answers, for sure.August 15, 2020 – 7:25 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think I will. I was too late for this weekend but I have time. It’s so weird “Planning” during all of this… especially since I’m planning on when we’ll set up our new porch sofa (delayed for weeks and weeks and no point planning). It’s a weird time. I miss DC for things like having lunch with YOU and having the community we built there. We haven’t found the same here, which I think is due to 1. no littles going to the same bus stop together, 2. no littles going to the common playground, and 3. it’s just more spread out here, and we have “choice” schools so if there’s a kid next door in the same grade, they probably go to a different school. It’s weird, and no there’s no school anyway, so…
      Gah. Miss you, my friend. Wish we could book a lunch even if socially distanced at a park or something.August 16, 2020 – 10:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Yeah, I’m so with you on the jealousy of not traveling…it’s so hard. Last summer we went to beautiful Montana and this summer, well, we had a brief “getaway” to upstate NY when we lost power due to a bad storm here. I called it our “mini-vacation.” Sigh…August 16, 2020 – 10:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Where did you go in Montana? My mom lives in Bozeman and last year was Tucker’s birthday trip up there. We drove, and went to the Tetons, Yellowstone, and then had the most amazing drive back over Bear Tooth Canyon (Gorge?) (Pass?) it was awesome though.
      Sorry to hear about your power but I bet it was so nice to get out of the house and stay somewhere else… ugh. It WILL be better. Let’s believe.August 16, 2020 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - What can I say, but this year for traveling has been a bust. No Disney plans and seriously I know it is the right choice, but still so sad and not happy about it at all. As for school, we had only two options (just in time for us to lose power here for a week due to the tropical storm) either full-time with mask and pleski-glass barriers (as sci-fi as it comes) or full-time remote for the first semester at least. We chose full-time remote as I isolated as remote sounds I couldn’t picture my kids wearing masks all-day and being behind pleski-glass. Just a no-win situation as far as decisions go. But still on all levels here we are. Hugs and honestly, I just don’t know what to feel or think anymoreAugust 16, 2020 – 9:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Such a bust. Sigh. You lost power for a week? I’m so sorry! Yikes.
      I think full-time remote makes sense. In my opinion, the schools will shut back down within a few weeks anyway. Gah. I do really mourn for their lack of contact with peers, but also? I don’t want any of us in the hospital, so there’s that, which is bigger. Hugs right back. 2020 sucks.August 16, 2020 – 9:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - We live in a beautiful place, but is it CO beautiful? I just don’t know! Our schools are fully remove until NOVEMBER. I am heartbroken and relieved.August 17, 2020 – 3:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Colorado is so beautiful. 300 sunny days a year (more than Miami — one of my first paid writing gigs was for the International Trade Association on Colorado tourism and I still remember the data mostly).
      I’m jealous about a November time-line. They’re taking way too small of a chunk of time here to have anything really change. It doesn’t make any sense. Sigh.August 17, 2020 – 9:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Also COME VISIT. I mean, when it makes sense to. You can stay with us and do so so many cool trips. My friend Julie saw 4 moose on a hike last week!August 17, 2020 – 9:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie G Smith - Hello! Here I am a week later. And I did have a post planned, ugh! School started on the Thursday of this FTSF prompt and it’s been nutso ever since. It does suck about the beach – but think of all the cool places you can get to! Wyoming, Arizona, New Mexico, and Utah. Go aby go!August 22, 2020 – 5:14 amReplyCancel

Everything feels like a slog these days. I’d rather ignore my feelings and binge-watch Netflix instead. In years other than the dumpster fire that 2020 is, we’d be going through last year’s school supplies, buying items we don’t have, and getting excited for fall leaves and new friendships while hoping middle school is kinder than […]

View full post »

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Chunky Monkey - You are awesome. August 8, 2020 – 3:59 amReplyCancel

  • Allison - Dang! I don’t know where to start!?

    First the picture…I’m embarrassed to tell you I can’t find the difference.

    Second – dang girl, you are funny & brave. For the most part, I totally agree with your comments. I do struggle with the learning at home thing, because Rich and I work full time – I’m not even home some days till 8. We got our ass kicked with the on-line learning, and my children were not educated at all last spring. It was a joke. At this point, I am almost thinking they need to start over NEXT August/September. Aud & Cam have big years, 7th & 10th, in the education realm with state tests and preparing for the all import 11-grade year). I don’t know how they’re going to do it. I would bet my house they shut schools down by Labor Day. If I was still at stay-at-home-mom, and God I wish I was!, there is no question, I would keep them home. But I’m not, and they’re going, and I feel like shit.

    B is a whole other matter. I’m sending him for his teacher, whom he loves, and I’ve spoken to, and she has a plan to keep him and his 6 classmates safe (BWT, B is a champ at mask-wearing). That is until the phone call yesterday. The school wants to pull her (her whole class is coming back) and use her as the “virtual teacher,” and take the other special needs teacher, who has less than half her students coming back, and combine the classes. Oh, and B’s teacher told me the other teacher thinks this is a hoax. Why the switch? Because B’s teacher is better at technology. SO I got that ugly phone call to make Monday morning.

    Finally, can you send me next week’s prompt:)? And yes, let’s schedule a phone date. BTW, I use an initial, cause I’m paranoid someone at the school will see. Weird times! That’s why I think you’re brave.

    Sadly, there are no good answers.August 8, 2020 – 6:55 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - First, the difference is just small words, bottom right, of “why do we exist?” Sigh.
      Learning at home SUCKS. It totally sucks. I work from home too and hired a tutor this past spring and it STILL SUCKED. Also, I realize I’m so lucky to be able to hire a tutor. But I work from home, which is different from not getting home until 8. I’m sorry you have to deal with that – especially now because the dumpster fire that 2020 is makes everything so much harder. 🙁
      Don’t feel like shit.
      The end. Don’t.
      Nobody knows anything now and we do what we can, right? DO NOT FEEL LIKE SHIT is the all of it.
      I totally get sending B to his teacher. BUT OMG tell me the phone call went well??? WTF?!?!? Why can’t schools and districts listen to the people who actually work with kids with challenges like B’s and JUST F#CKING LISTEN??? Tell me how it went. I hope the better at technology thing was pooped on and that his original situation is upheld.
      Tux had a video meeting with his special ed support person and get this – it’s actually better for us right now that it’s all up in the air because he qualifies for so much less support here than in Virginia, and because of the weirdness and all of it, they’re going to let him keep status quo, which is still less but better than nothing.
      Next week’s prompt is “When it comes to travel (favorite trip, way to travel, etc.)” OMG you could totally do anything of yours with it! ALso, this week’s is open until Wednesday or something if you want to vent (with initials of course 😉August 9, 2020 – 2:17 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara Bowman - I guess I’m relieved, and not relieved, that our decision was made for us already.
    And yes, the venom on those FB pages is insane. I won’t be like Erica or Lisa. I’ll be heartbroken and also relieved. I’ll also remember that 6th grade sucked badly for me. I hope it doesn’t for Scarlet, even though it’s land of the bizarro!August 8, 2020 – 8:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I like your decision and think it’s nice it was made for you. I bet your district (or school – not sure which level) is full of Ericas too. Scarlet is going to ROCK 6th grade. I know it. I mean, look at her. She’s amazing.
      (but also 6th grade sucks so hoping it doesn’t for any of our kids)August 9, 2020 – 2:18 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I do not envy anyone the job of deciding what to do about school – not the school admin, teachers, parents – no one. We are profoundly grateful we don’t have to make this choice since we moved Z. to a cyber school a full year ago already. I think if we DID have to decide, we’d be figuring out an at-home option for sure, though.
    Love you guys and sending it your way. Hang in there. This whole thing is mad hard for everybody, in lots of different ways.
    And no, I’m with Allison – I have no idea what T’s addition is.
    xoAugust 8, 2020 – 4:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I don’t envy anybody either. I feel especially bad for the teachers, who seem to get the brunt of the anger. It’s just sad (and stupid because this should be a time we come together). Sigh. Love you too and thanks so much.
      Oh! And Tucker’s addition is bottom right – small words. LMK if you see it. It’s kinda sad, but funny, but sad. Or something like 2020 in general…August 9, 2020 – 2:22 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - Looks as if Hybrid is the model our district is choosing with no choices unless you have special circumstances…but, if we had to choose, I could see it being tough. There’s no right answer! Can we all please just hibernate until 2020 is over???August 12, 2020 – 12:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - They actually changed it. K-5 is all day, every day (YIKES) but 6th – 12th is 100% online to start. They’ll re-evaluate mid September. Agh. And yes, please to hibernating until 2020 is over.August 13, 2020 – 8:18 pmReplyCancel

      • Emily - They just changed it for us too! Now we DO have a choice – hybrid or fully remote. We chose hybrid, but like I said earlier, no choice feels 100% “right.”August 16, 2020 – 10:04 amReplyCancel

« Older posts

N e v e r   m i s s   a   n e w   p o s t !