Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

Sometimes, I think that parenting is like living with varying degrees of Survivor’s Guilt.  It’s easy to assume that foreign-to-us situations are so different from what we go through daily that we feel guilt over “having it better.”  So often, people feel compelled to qualify comments, both here, and in life, to clarify that they, […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Kerri - Thank you, my friend…for encouraging me to GO THERE and be MORE. Of taking one small school idea and trying to make it accessible to all. That you get the whole yes, my challenge might not be as great at yours but you know what it is still important to me feeling. From the bottom of my soul, thank you for making me moreMay 28, 2014 – 12:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thank YOU, for your excellent movement, and I hope everybody does a “What’s Your Challenge?” at their kids’ elementary schools! You are – and have been – So so much. xoxoxoMay 28, 2014 – 11:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Oh man alive – the “you poor thing. Raising two kids on your own because your husband died” just came a whooshing back. Big time. You are bang on Kristi – we DO all have our own challenges. Yes, I had to raise my two by myself but does that make me more “special” than anyone else? Absolutely not.May 28, 2014 – 12:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can just imagine the comments you got over raising your two kids on your own, Kelly! And I think you’re pretty special, actually. For real.May 28, 2014 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I love this post Kristi! Sorry I cut it close – I thought yesterday was Tuesday. Still thought today was Wednesday – so imagine my surprise. Anyway this is great. I’m on my phone so I can’t wait to see the slide show on a bigger screen. Ditto – we shouldn’t be ashamed of our challenges. I can’t really embrace the challenge of making new friends but I can gather up some courage to talk to some strangers 😉May 28, 2014 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - GRINNING HUGE. Our Lands usually go up on Wednesday mornings, although recently, I’ve been trying to do them Tuesday nights (this one didn’t make that, obviously). Finish the Sentence Friday is Thursdays. Maybe that’s where the confusion came in? Also, I’m always messed up over what day/week it is. I can’t believe it’s almost June. I think I’m in denial. Thanks huge for participating!!May 28, 2014 – 11:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Wonderful! I think we all experience a kind survivor guilt to some degree and I thank you for putting it out there and saying it is OK. 🙂May 28, 2014 – 12:56 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Elizabeth. I think you’re right. I hope it’s OK because if not, too many of us are in trouble! 🙂May 28, 2014 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - This is EXACTLY what I think whenever I hear someone trying to put their very real problem in a world context. Yes, it may not compare to genocide, but it’s a real problem for you, right now, and it’s worth talking about (and even complaining about).
    I also think about this in the context of a child’s worries. I think I was taught that my worries (in childhood) were not that important because I was a child, and therefore, could not have anything serious to worry about. But the truth is, a child worries are just as valid and real as an adult’s. Just because they know less of the world, it does not mean that the worries are less significant.
    Ummmm….but worrying is not productive, right?May 28, 2014 – 2:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sarah I love how you included how important it is to recognize a child’s worries in your comment. So true that they’re just as valid and important and should be acknowledged and understood and accepted. Cheers to that.
      And um, yeah, worrying isn’t productive, but it’s really hard NOT to do. Thanks so much for your family’s challenge photos!May 28, 2014 – 11:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - I loved this SO much! And love, love, love the message! Relativism has its place but we don’t ALWAYS have to use it as our go to tool. Sometimes it helps to put things in perspective and sometimes it’s totally unnecessary, as you say Kristi, whatever it is we’re experiencing in our own home is a big deal. For us. Thank you so much for the quote and mention and for inviting me to be part of this super important project and thank you Kerri for coming up with such a fantastic idea!May 28, 2014 – 2:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks so much for your help today Katia, and for your amazing thoughts and voice every day, and on all of the days. You are awesome (and I think your hair is, too).May 28, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Love that you did this and would have loved to have been a part, too, because trust me I have enough challenges here myself and could relate to a few listed above.May 28, 2014 – 2:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Janine,
      I SO wish you’d been a part of it, too. I’ll have to do another one. I put it on my Facebook page but know too many people didn’t see it – sorry about that! I know you can relate and I’m bummed that I didn’t get to include you!! xoxoMay 28, 2014 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - You did it. You did it just right, you explained it just right. It’s a lesson we all need to take to heart, and yet don’t we still doubt ourselves after admitting we need to stop? Ugh, ugly circle of guilt. But this is an amazing reminder and for now, well, I will share this and hope that many of my friends IRL get a chance to read this and really think about how the same we are….May 28, 2014 – 3:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks, Jen. That means so much to me to hear you say it! Such a huge guilt cycle…. sigh. We’re the same more than anything. XO and TTTx10May 28, 2014 – 11:31 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Thanks for including my family in this awesome project, Kristi.My kids'(and my)challenges may not be huge in relation to others, but they are real to them and they deserve to be acknowledged. But perspective is important too, and I think doing this gave them some.May 28, 2014 – 3:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for participating in it, Dana. You and your kids ROCK and you’re right. Everybody’s challenges are important, real, and worthy of recognition.May 28, 2014 – 11:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - I’m crying. I feel so lucky to be part of this and so connected to the others in the photos. Many of their challenges are also challenges to me or my loved ones.May 28, 2014 – 3:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry for the tears Jean, but THANK YOU huge for participating. You’re awesome and here’s to challenges being owned by us. No matter what we think we may feel about deserving them. xoxoxoMay 28, 2014 – 11:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I’m so confused, today IS Wednesday. I thought Our Land was on Thursday. My poster should have said my challenge was four day weeks.

    Geez.May 28, 2014 – 3:37 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - First of all, I SUCK with a capital S…I really wanted to contribute to this, but I dropped the ball. Please accept my sincere apology for being the lamest of lame! I do feel a little better because one of my challenges was represented above, but still…I am hoping to redeem myself and perhaps participate in Kerri’s new series. Anyway, I loved this so so so much! BTW, One of my challenges is being overly-sensitive. And I’m stubborn – I can’t let things go! Call me Miss Grudge!May 28, 2014 – 5:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, I think I may do another. When Kerri and I first spoke about it, that was what I thought I’d do – wasn’t sure whether she’d do the series or not, but either way, you should contribute! I’m sure she’d love to have you, as would I in another compilation! HAHAH to being stubborn and Miss Grudge (hard to not do).May 28, 2014 – 11:42 pmReplyCancel

  • allison carter - This is beautiful. So happy to be a part of such a fabulous project. (& I would take that hair…)May 28, 2014 – 6:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I’m in tears here to see so many brave faces of strangers, future friends and friends. And it’s beautiful.
    I definitely have my own challenges to face – and I’d be happy to participate should this come around again. I’d even have Des hold up a sign that says, “My challenge is having poops that don’t offend even the dog.”May 28, 2014 – 9:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tamara,
      I think I must must must do another, if only to include your hot bearded amazing face, you. Also, Imma hold you to that photo of Des, because AWESOME.May 29, 2014 – 12:32 amReplyCancel

  • Alison - Thank you for putting into words what I cannot, at least without sounding like I’m rambling.

    My son is 4 1/2 and his brother, aged 2, speaks fuller sentences than him, and talks more than he does. He has other behavioural issues which we are trying to work through, with slow progress. But I am loathe to talk about this too much publicly, not because I’m ashamed, but that I feel I may be trivializing other parents’ challenges with children who are suffering from terminal or debilitating illnesses, whose special needs far ‘outweighs’ ours. Precisely what YOU are saying here. That other people’s unique challenges does not diminish our own, very real ones. Thank you.

    I would love to participate if there was another round!May 28, 2014 – 11:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Alison,
      Thank YOU for part of your story. I, for one (obviously), don’t feel like anybody is trivializing anybody else’s experience by speaking about their own. With that said, I so get what you mean, and it’s a hard, hard thing to figure out where our needs fit in, in this world.
      I do want to do another round and would LOVE for you to participate.May 29, 2014 – 12:37 amReplyCancel

  • Lizzy - Muddle-Headed Mamma - Kristi, this is just incredible. It’s so real, it’s so moving and it says so much in so few words. Katia’s comment really sums up exactly how your blog makes me feel too. We all have challenges and as mothers we all feel guilt. It’s just amazing and so beautiful how you put this post together and have show how, although we are all so different, we can still bond and still be there to support each other through empathy and friendship.May 29, 2014 – 8:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Lizzy! Thank you, sweets! You’re so right that we bond in spite of our differences. The blogging/writing community is really incredible that way and something I’d never have expected when I began this journey.May 29, 2014 – 1:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - I cannot express how much I love this idea! Where do I sign? The challenge of parenting is so very real as are the challenges faced by our kids, ALL of our kids. I read about moms with kids with special needs and feel like I can’t participate with something like chronic tic disorder, anxiety, scoliosis in the beginning stages of diagnosis, and raising a grandchild with behavioral issues from his abusive past. They seemed small in comparison. But you are right…to us they aren’t small. They are the battles we fight ever day, some better than others. These things weigh on me and I just didn’t want to sound like I was complaining about things that, like I said, seem so small. Thank you for this. Just thank you!May 29, 2014 – 9:03 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sandy,
      I hear you. I do the same thing and then even when I do post about “small” things, I feel guilty about it because other people do have it so much worse. But still, our realities are ours and just because somebody else’s is harder doesn’t take away from the hardships in our own homes, if that makes sense. And thank you for being awesome in general.May 29, 2014 – 1:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Samara - This has moved me to tears.

    My son has ADHD and Sensory Processing Disorder. He has a whole bunch of other issues stemming from an underdeveloped neurological system when he was born.

    Parenting him is so HARD. But I never write about it, because I feel like other families have it so much worse. I’ve witnessed it.

    Thank you for this. xoMay 29, 2014 – 9:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Samara,
      Even if other people have it worse, if it would help you to write about it, then you should. If you’d rather not, don’t! I write about Tucker’s issues all the time and his aren’t “that bad” compared to so many other’s, but they’re well, ours so….
      thank you so much for your sweet comment. Sorry about the tears though.May 29, 2014 – 7:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Hi Kristi: What a beautiful project and message. I found some of the images were quite serious, and other made me smile. Great view of family life! Thanks so much for putting this together….May 29, 2014 – 11:00 amReplyCancel

  • Beth Teliho - Ohmygosh this is wonderful. So powerful, Kristi. What an amazing idea. I just want to hug every single person. My challenge is: crippling self-doubt and horrendous self-image. I work on them everyday. And I suppose I always will. (some days are better than others;)

    Thank you for this. It gave me a feeling of hope and solidarity. Just beautiful. xoxoMay 29, 2014 – 8:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - This is awesome and what a wonderful idea! My oldest daughter is super smart- so smart she goes to a special school for academically gifted kids and makes straight A’s. Keeping her engaged and not bored is a HUGE challenge that I don’t often share because it feels almost like bragging. “My kids is so smart I can’t . . . . . ” But, so true that everyone has challenges – big & small. Love this series!May 31, 2014 – 9:32 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - So sorry to have missed this – we certainly have a house full of challenges here! It’s a great and important thing to recognize – we all have needs and challenges. Some of us more or less than others, that’s all.May 31, 2014 – 2:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Rolf - Jane-what makes you think Raising My Rainbow is a scam? I just looked at it and there is no fursnaiding going on. I suppose it could be in the fiction blog category, like so many things online, but that didn’t jump out at me. Did you match up pictures on that blog with images elsewhere?February 22, 2016 – 3:05 amReplyCancel

Today’s Our Land Series was written by my new friend Amanda of Everything Special Ed. Amanda is a mom, a special needs advocate, and author of The Everything Parent’s Guide to Special Education.  She uses her experience to help parents understand and navigate the confusing world of IEPs and special education and empowers them with the […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Diane - Brilliant. Absolutely brilliant!May 21, 2014 – 10:15 amReplyCancel

  • Allie Smith - Okay, I love this, because I never know what to say either!!!! I have four kids – three that have IEPs. One has autism and is in a self contained classroom. One has learning disabilities and gets support for reading and test modifications. One has terrible articulation, so he is pulled out for speech therapy twice a week. According to the school system, they’re all in special education! It’s just so difficult. I’ll mention that I’m going to an IEP meeting for one of the younger two, and I’ll get an reaction like, “They have an IEP?” Frustrating. Then there’s child number four – who I also think has special needs, cause she’s too smart for her own good.

    Greta post – I’m going to check out your book, as well. I wish that had been around ten years ago!May 21, 2014 – 10:41 amReplyCancel

    • Misty - i would love to hear more about the testing accommodations your child receives!May 21, 2014 – 11:01 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allie,
      Wow, what a lot of IEPs to keep track of but so good for your kids that they’re getting the services that they need from school. We should talk about the one who has terrible articulation – I’d be curious as to the type of speech therapy you’re doing and how his speech patterns/articulation has evolved. Tucker’s speech is his biggest challenge, I think. Often, he’ll switch word sounds around so things like “music” become “mu-isk” and “small” is “moffs.” I know you’re getting ready for your super-cool roadtrip but would love to chat when you get back!May 21, 2014 – 11:04 amReplyCancel

    • Amanda - It’s so hard to find the right words! People whose kids aren’t in special education don’t always understand that the I in IEP is for “individualized,” so I find they have a hard time getting that “special education” can look drastically different from one kid to the next. And please do check out the book! (I wish I had it ten years ago, too.)May 21, 2014 – 1:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - i have to admit that i usually shy away from your our land posts. i have a hard time reading the heart breaking stories shared here, and to be completely honest, i’m often left feeling that i should never complain about the hand my family has been dealt because there are tons of families who face challenges and heart break that i cannot truly imagine. i shy away from the words special and disability and have rebelled against an autism diagnosis for as long as i can remember it being put on the table. my daughter and her struggles seem completely minuscule compared with the stories shared here. and i feel so guilty because i am so glad that her struggles are minuscule, and that just makes me feel like i’m trespassing on those brave families who are willing to share their stories week after week. i never felt a common bond before today, but after reading this post, i realize that special education is the common thread that binds us all together. i’m putting amanda and her books on my to read list for the summer! thanks for sharing!May 21, 2014 – 10:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey Misty,
      I’m so glad that you told me how you feel about the Our Land posts. There are times when I feel really guilty, too, because compared to so much, Tucker is really really easy. He’s loving, mobile, funny, and loves to snuggle and play. I know that not everybody gets to experience those things with their children so I feel guilty about it too. But you know what? The thing is – every single person has issues they’re working out, special needs and not, and just because somebody else’s are worse, does not mean that ours aren’t meaningful in our own lives, ya know?
      It’s easy to dismiss our own struggles knowing others have it worse, but things could ALWAYS be worse. Always. I don’t think you’re trespassing on the brave families but totally get where you’re coming from.
      Still, though, I’m sorry that they make you feel that way. I think everybody has a right to complain…

      In fact, next week, I’m doing an Our Land compilation along with Kerri Ames about how everybody has a challenge. Let me know if you’d like to participate or want more details. And you’re right – special education does bind us all! xoMay 21, 2014 – 11:09 amReplyCancel

    • Amanda - I know how you feel about feeling as though you can’t complain because somebody else’s story is more compelling or heartbreaking. I used to worry a lot about that when I wrote about my family’s experience and wondered if people will feel I’m making comparisons. But I’ve realized that no matter what you’re dealing with, it’s hard for you and that can’t be minimized, nor is it less worthy of mention than other people’s “stuff.” I totally agree, too, that pecial education is the common bond!May 21, 2014 – 1:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - I love the Calvinball analogy, very apt. 🙂 I am fairly sure that in my family, I am like your oldest daughter, followed by another daughter with issues that went undiagnosed. From that perspective, I very much appreciate the frame in which you keep her needs in mind along with the needs of your sons.May 21, 2014 – 10:59 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Elizabeth, I love it, too (and love Calvin and Hobbs in general). Thanks for your thoughtful comment and I agree that it’s important to keep everybody’s needs in mind.May 21, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - Thank you! When you have kids with stuff going on, it can be really easy to think that the kid(s) who don’t are OK or don’t need you as much. Being the sibling of kids with higher-level needs is really tough on my daughter, so I try really hard to be there for her and know what she needs. Although, she is a teenager, so right now that’s pretty frequently money and food. 🙂May 21, 2014 – 1:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - What can I say that hasn’t bee said here except that I very much enjoyed reading this today and even kids who don’t necessarily have special needs still do have their own needs, wants and desires, too from their parents and trust me with two little girls (who aren’t special needs) I have learned this and still learning this daily. Thank you for sharing this here today with all of us.May 21, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - I would love to entered to win what sounds like an excellent resource. I, too, wondered about my performance (as a special educator) after I had a child with special needs. Experience makes us more compassionate!May 21, 2014 – 12:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - It’s a weird realization, isn’t it? I had a professor in college who said she thought parents make better teachers. I get that now. Maybe our kids make us better special educators!May 21, 2014 – 1:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I think you’re right, Sarah! Being on the parenting side of special needs makes it real (not that I know what it feels like to be a special ed teacher but still). 😉May 21, 2014 – 7:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - It’s weird when life throws you a curve ball. I had a similar experience. My older child that typical, “easy” first born that tricks you into having a second. Then Boo came along and we were recruited into this special life. For me, I don’t qualify. I always say I have two daughters. I let others figure out that they are both special in their own way.

    Oh and I bet you wanted to smack the person who said how lucky your child was to pick you for a mom since you were in the know. Congrats on restraining yourself 🙂May 21, 2014 – 12:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - I kind of did want to smack her! I’ve learned to pick my battles wisely over the years, but it still stings. But I have an awesome T-shirt that says, “Before criticizing someone, walk a mile in their shoes. Then when you do criticize them, you will be a mile away and have their shoes.” 😉May 21, 2014 – 1:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh and I want to be entered…should have read/followed the rules 🙂May 21, 2014 – 12:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA rule breaker. You’re entered. Here’s to all kids being special in their ways!!May 21, 2014 – 7:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Stacie Sparkman - We were so blessed to have Amanda work with our kiddo when he was just a toddler. She helped us when we didn’t know how to help ourselves. She has continued to be a support, confidant, and wonderful friend. That kiddo just turned 13 and has grown into a quirky, fun, unbelievable young man with a heart bigger than his father’s Texas. I’m glad that I get to share her with all of you as she is amazing!May 21, 2014 – 3:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m so glad that Amanda shared her story here, Stacie, and what an excellent testimonial from you. I’m so glad she helped your son so much and he sounds wonderful!May 22, 2014 – 7:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Uplifting Families - I am a strong believer that every child is different including their needs. I have two special needs children and I am thankful for them. My oldest was born hearing impaired and wears cochlear implants. My older son developed eczema, mild asthma, and ADHD. They all keep me on my toes but I am thankful that most of their needs are mild compared to other kids.May 21, 2014 – 6:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I am too! You’re so right that each child’s needs are different and that all are special, in a lot of ways. I think one of the messages that parents of typical kids haven’t heard enough is the one that we’re all so much more alike than we are different.May 22, 2014 – 7:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Neither of my children have special needs (as defined by society), but I find that I can always relate to each Our Land post as a mother and a person who wants our society to be better. Thank you for sharing your story, Amanda!May 21, 2014 – 8:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana, YOU are already making the whole world better, by raising your kids to care about the challenges of everybody. True words, that. Ghetto speak with a hand signal for emphasis. That I’m not really cool ’nuff to pull off but well, yeah, that.May 21, 2014 – 10:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - One of things I always hope to impart is that mothers are just mothers no matter what our kids are like and that’s a really important common bond! I never want other moms to think I’m operating on a different level than them just because we deal with a whole lot of the unexpected in our house. 🙂May 22, 2014 – 12:09 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - Being a PT with a special needs child I got the same response re luck….like you I feel really lucky to have him.May 21, 2014 – 9:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH to the dicks. Just, ugh.May 21, 2014 – 10:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YAYAYAYYAYYYY to WP comments, by the way.May 21, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - It’s such a dumb response, but I think it’s well-intentioned most of the time. But nobody ever says to a plumber, “He’s so lucky to have you as a parent in case he ever backs things up by throwing all LEGO blocks in the toilet.” 😉May 22, 2014 – 12:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I completely agree with you that ALL children have special needs. I have three daughters and none of them have been diagnosed with any “official” special needs. However, they are each unique and individual. My oldest is super smart and we have to work to keep her challenged. Otherwise, she is bored and unmotivated. My middle one is a ball of energy. She doesn’t sit still and we have to keep her energy level in mind we we ask her to sit for an extended time. My youngest is my super girly one. No dirt, no bugs, no sweat. And, she has seasonal allergies that keep her indoors in the spring. They don’t have diagnoses, but they certainly have special, unique needs.May 21, 2014 – 9:37 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Here’s to recognizing all children’s needs, Lisa. Because that’s big, important, and, ultimately, the whole point of Our Land – that everybody deserves empathy and understanding.May 21, 2014 – 11:13 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - Sometimes the diagnosis is overrated. Kids are who they are no matter what diagnosis they have. It’s a very helpful way to get the services and support your child needs, but I never look at my son and say “This is Jacob who has high-functioning autism.” Usually, it’s more like “This is Jacob who is making silly puns, is stepping on my foot, won’t move out of his sister’s way and drew an amazing comic book.” Even when he’s having a rough day, it’s more like “Ugh, this is my son who is stuck on something again and is having a tough time calming down.”May 22, 2014 – 12:23 pmReplyCancel

      • Kristi Campbell - Amanda, I have to say that I love your perspective (again) and so wish that every parent realized that we just see our kids and think “this is my boy. He is amazing, and stepping on my foot” rather than thinking “this is my boy. He has autism.” So well said.May 22, 2014 – 7:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Well you’re a beautiful and thoughtful writer!
    One of my good friends has six kids – four with special needs. She used to keep a blog but stopped. It’s mostly her Facebook status updates that really clue me into the amazing world she is building for her family.
    I know the struggles are so very there.May 22, 2014 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Six kids? YIKES> and awesome? I barely have time for my blog with one little boy so I’d imaging that keeping one up with six kids is beyond impossible.May 22, 2014 – 7:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - Thank you for the compliment! Your friend has a whole lot on her plate–I don’t think I’d be able to keep a blog going if I had 6 kids, regardless of their needs. Wow. I really like that you view it as building a world for her family. It’s a great phrase.May 23, 2014 – 11:05 amReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - I do think every child has some sort of special need. Please enter me in your contest. Loved the piece.May 22, 2014 – 4:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Entered, Linda, and yes, I, too, believe every child has needs that are special and unique to him/her. As do we, who are grown!May 22, 2014 – 7:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - Beautiful! Every kid does have their own needs. We deal with what we have. My kids don’t have special needs, but it doesn’t mean we never have issues. I can’t even imagine what would possess someone to say something like that to you. Sometimes people just don’t think before they speak.May 23, 2014 – 6:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - So true, Michelle. Each kid really does have his own needs and that should be recognized as well!May 26, 2014 – 5:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - It’s so true that families of kids who have special needs don’t have issues! I find that I have to try really hard sometimes to keep in mind what’s age and developmentally appropriate for my kids so I don’t ascribe everything to their “recognizable” issues. 🙂May 27, 2014 – 11:40 amReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - Amanda did a great job with this—so eloquently written and so helpful for parents out there struggling with similar issues. Another helpful post for me to share again with my daughter who is interning in special ed.May 23, 2014 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree that Amanda did an excellent job with this, Marcia (when will YOU write an our land for me anyway??). Thanks for sharing it with your daughter!May 26, 2014 – 5:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - Thank you! If your daughter ever wants to talk about special ed, feel free to send her my way. (My husband would probably be thrilled to have me talk shop with someone else for a little while.)May 27, 2014 – 11:41 amReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Wow. This is a very informative post. It reminds me though that man isn’t ok with things unless he can categorize and label everything. Sometimes like in this case, a label for you isn’t necessary. You have beautiful children. My only prayer is for you to be able to feel as blessed as the blessings that they truly are 🙂May 25, 2014 – 4:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I so agree that labels aren’t always necessary (or even good) at times, Brittnei. Here’s to all of us realizing what blessings all children are!May 26, 2014 – 5:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - I can’t wait for the day when we stop calling things “labels” and start looking at them as “descriptors.”May 27, 2014 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

  • Kerith Stull - She brings up a lot of odd things people say or we have to figure out how to say. Another one… How do I refer to the man in our house? My husband? Brielle’s father? Why isn’t there a word that encompasses both? Labels, labels, labels. Sometimes they are so useful and other times, they are completely useless and unnecessary. And don’t we all have special needs indeed? Everything is on a bell curve. Some are just are farther on one end or another.May 26, 2014 – 2:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I love the idea of the bell curve Kerith. I never really thought about there not being a label that says “husband and father” but well, now I will be (thanks for that haha). I hope you’re having a great weekend!May 26, 2014 – 5:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Amanda Morin - Very true, without all different types of people, there wouldn’t even be that Bell Curve. It’s what makes the world interesting. (Now I’m trying to figure out what word makes sense for a husband-father…)May 27, 2014 – 11:44 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Kristi and Amanda – thank you for this great post. I particularly loved this line, “I’m still not sure you should have more children than you have parents or hands for…” My Husband has always said that our family plan was to never let the children outnumber us or our hands if we were home alone with them. As it turns out, we have one child…one very large handful of an exceptional child…and this equation works just fine for us!
    Your section on the game always changing and the score not making sense – yup, we get that. Thanks for your words and insights here. I look forward to checking out more on your blog, too!May 31, 2014 – 1:48 pmReplyCancel

There’s a lot of stuff to be thankful for, out there, in this big huge world, right now. Much of it has to do with kindness, empathy, wonder, and appreciation. I’m an advocate for all of those, always. But I’ve been thinking about grammar this week. Here’s a quick guide to some of the grammatical […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Misty - i so love this!May 19, 2014 – 6:44 amReplyCancel

  • Allie - Kristi, I love this. Thank goodness for my husband, he is my grammar cop. One that sometimes irritates me is the misuse of “that” and “which.”May 19, 2014 – 7:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allie, “that” and “which” can be tricky and whenever I’m not sure which to use, I change the sentence so that I don’t have to use either.May 19, 2014 – 11:52 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Love this and should totally be taught in every English 101 class across the country. Seriously, not sure how many still don’t know their proper grammar and so many of these are truly pet peeves of mine when I see them being misused so very often. Great job though Kristi and totally nailed it!! 🙂May 19, 2014 – 7:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Janine! Feel free to use the drawings in your classroom if you ever decide to go back to teaching! 😉May 19, 2014 – 8:15 pmReplyCancel

  • christine - So, what say you on the “all of a sudden” vs. “all of the sudden” controversy?

    I bugs me a bit when people use they or their instead of he or she or her or his. I get that people want to be PC or something, but their is plural. Don’t use it if you’re talking about a single person.

    And to Jean, I never know which I’m supposed to use, lie or lay. I just pull an Elmer Fudd and find a different way to say what I want to say. 🙂May 19, 2014 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

    • christine - It also bugs me a bit when people don’t reread their comments and leave typos when they are talking about being grammatically correct. (No it doesn’t.) I’m an idiot.May 19, 2014 – 8:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi - John and I agree on most issues, but have had to agree to disagree on the “all of a sudden” vs. “all of the sudden” question. I was shocked when I heard him say “the!”May 19, 2014 – 10:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Christine,
      Well. Until NOW, I’ve never even heard “all of THE sudden” but that just sounds plain old weird and wrong to me. They vs. he/she bugs me as well but I’ve been trying to let go on that one because I understand people’s points when they (used correctly) don’t want it to sound as formal as he/she. I usually choose (not chose which is another one) a sex and do the “blah blah blah “he” thing). I never know about lie vs. lay either so I do the same thing you do!! HAHA. Guess that says we’re so brilliant that we’re even able to rework a sentence to avoid the words we don’t want to use.May 19, 2014 – 8:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah Rudell Beach (@LeftBrainBuddha) - Oh thank you thank you thank you for this!!!! These little grammatical errors drive this teacher absolutely bonkers! I may use your pictures with my students!May 19, 2014 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hehe Sarah! Let me know if you need “cleaner” versions of the graphics for your students 😉May 19, 2014 – 8:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - The misuse of the word “literally” isn’t really a grammatical error, but it makes me laugh!May 19, 2014 – 10:51 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - The misuse of the word literally may make Kristi (in the comment above) laugh, but annoys the hell out of me! I live in constant fear of making these errors due to a typo, because I certainly know the correct usage. Ok, maybe constant fear is an exaggeration. You get my point.May 19, 2014 – 11:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can’t think of when it’s used incorrectly! Help? HAHAH to the constant fear. I make errors all over the place and I’m fine with my own. Yours, too, not that I’ve noticed one.May 19, 2014 – 8:28 pmReplyCancel

      • christine - For example, “I literally died laughing.”May 19, 2014 – 8:31 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - OH! Really!!! People say that? HAHAHA I’d totally call them on that. Or him. Or her, if it was just you know, one single person instead of a bunch. Thanks, Christine!May 19, 2014 – 8:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Elizabeth - Love this! What fun!May 19, 2014 – 1:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - All of these bother me! All of them.
    I’m also bothered by you not getting any new babies or puppies.
    I want both. Is that weird?
    Cassidy would have to do all of the work this time, though.May 19, 2014 – 1:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sigh. I want lots of babies and puppies. Until I think about babies and puppies and then I want lots and lots and lots of both. But, well. So no, you’re not weird. Ever.May 19, 2014 – 10:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - I always appreciate someone willin to clarify these rules for the ignorant masses (was that too harsh?). ‘Of’ instead of ‘have’ makes me want to scream. But overuse of ‘I’ instead of ‘me’ makes me scream louder. And ‘they’ instead of ‘he or she’ which almost everyone on the planet does wrong.May 19, 2014 – 1:58 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH to the ignorant masses, Sarah! And no, not too harsh ever. I vs. Me pisses me off as well. When I was 12 years old, I went to stay with my very proper grandmother for the summer. I got a dime every time I said “yes” instead of “yeah” or “uh huh.” AND the bonus? More when I said “and me.” in the right way rather than “and I,” which is the instinct of the unknowing nonthinkers 😉May 19, 2014 – 10:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Robbie - I LOVE this!! I cringe when I hear or read bad grammar. I’d add “pecifically” to the list.May 19, 2014 – 2:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Oh this is hilarious Kristi! And educational too of course.
    I wrote an article on this topic too, when I used to write at HubPages. And tried to make it funny, but my attempt did not come close to this.
    You covered many of my pet hates, though lose and loose are another as is misuse of lay – which I noticed Jean also mentioned. That one probably irritates me most, because so many people use it that it’s almost become accepted to say lay where you should say lie.

    But I will confess that I am guilty of Christine’s pet hate and often use they instead of she/he. So I guess we all do something we shouldn’t!May 19, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Yvonne! I never was on the HubPages stuff, but I’m sure yours was AWESOME and hilarious and much more brilliant than this. I can’t believe I forgot about loose vs. lose (and choose vs. chose). I suck at lay vs. lie and yeah, the “them” thing is one that I think is becoming more widely accepted.May 19, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - OMG! I love you so much!!! I am a self proclaimed grammar nazi – born and raised by a high school English teacher (my mom). These all drive me insane. I think the regardless/irregardless one is the worst because people who say it think they are saying something very intelligent. It’s the same as “I could care less.” It should be “I COULDN”T care less.” Anyway, this is awesome! 🙂May 19, 2014 – 5:48 pmReplyCancel

    • christine - How could I have forgotten the could care less?!?!?! That makes me nuts. Every time someone says it I correct him in my head.May 19, 2014 – 8:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Lisa! I love you back! And here’s to grammar and doing it right – you’re probably way better than I am with it if you were raised by an English teacher! But yeah, they drive me insane, too. I’m continually shocked by how many writers use the wrong “you’re” vs. “your.”
      And YES to “I couldn’t care less!!!!” A great addition! Will save for round two!!May 19, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

      • Janice - “I could care less” is the one mistake that bothers me the most, so much so that I can’t let it slide when someone uses it with me, and I always retort: So, you could care less? I’m so obnoxious.May 21, 2014 – 9:24 amReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Janice, I love that you actually say “so you could care less?” It IS infuriating though!May 21, 2014 – 10:29 amReplyCancel

  • allison - LOVE IT.
    PRETTY sure I do “of” instead of “have” more times than I would admit to. Thankfully I now have an image of a dark haired professor with a British accent in my head telling me I am wrong. WRONG. That I should HAVE used should HAVE. (like what I did there?)May 19, 2014 – 7:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well. Now you know then? And if it makes you feel better, I never gave the “of” vs. “have” much thought until a work friend of mine, who went to HARVARD for MBA used “I could of” in an email to me. Then? Oh yeah. Probably jealousy and loved what you did there. 😉May 19, 2014 – 11:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Michele @ A Storybook Life - This post is a thing of beauty. It’s immediately going up on the corkboard in my office!May 19, 2014 – 8:14 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - YAY for corkboards with my stupid-looking drawings on them 😉
      Seriously though, thanks, Michele.May 19, 2014 – 11:08 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - truth be known I have made the its mistake but I must admit…just as you see no cap on the first letter of this diatribe, I am not stupid . I am a lazy ass.May 19, 2014 – 8:39 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - BTW: switched to wordpress. So my comments should show IRRegardless… actually that one drives me ape-shit!May 19, 2014 – 8:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lazy ass is GOOD. Stupid is stupid. Duh.May 19, 2014 – 11:09 pmReplyCancel

  • Jess H. - All of these errors drive me nuts. I especially cannot stand when people use irregardless as a word. Ack.May 19, 2014 – 9:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Kim - Oh – I can’t stand the obvious misuse of so many of those words!!! Fun post!!!May 19, 2014 – 10:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Dyanne @ I Want Backsies - I’m a grammar nazi, too, and have raised two more. My daughter came back from competing at state music contest with a shirt she bought that simply says *you’re

    I agree that all the ones you listed are annoying as hell. I also hate adding an “S” to a word, such as Walmarts. Anyways. And my boss puts “ect.” instead of “etc.” on EVERYTHING. I just let it go and have a private snicker….May 19, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dyanne,
      That’s awesome about your daughters being grammar nazis and I <3 the shirt that just says *you're! HAHA to Walmarts. I haven't heard that one but it's funny. Here's to bosses and snickering. You'd think spellcheck would auto-correct "ect" because ugh.May 20, 2014 – 10:38 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle AKA Crumpets and Bollocks - When it came to urban street language, I learned from people with bad grammar, so when they say crack feen, what they mean is crack fiend and when they say heffer, what they really mean is heifer. It’s funny because I only heard these terms on the streets like street vernacular, but they are not urban dictionary made up words, like they really existed before the streets started using them and misspelling them.

    But I’ve learned that words change over time as people misuse them. For instance, the definition of sarcasm used to be a straight insult and the verbal irony involved, saying one thing but meaning another, was reserved for verbal irony. Now a days, sarcasm and verbal irony mean the same thing because that many people were misinformed.May 20, 2014 – 6:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Michelle, I can’t think of the word that I was going to use as another example of how their meanings change over time as people misuse them. Also? Thanks for the “crack feen” clarification because well, AWESOME.May 20, 2014 – 11:44 amReplyCancel

  • Molley@A Mother Life - And then we have the other fun ones like conversate and on accident! *head implodes can. no. longer. type, must. go. lie. down…….*

    Grammar is a dying art that we must fight to save… Who’s with me?May 20, 2014 – 8:14 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Molley – “conversate” makes me laugh because I assume it’s being used as a joke, even when it’s not. Here’s to saving grammar! A revolution!!May 20, 2014 – 11:56 amReplyCancel

      • Molley@A Mother Life - I know, I can’t help but correct them when it’s used in my presence… I can’t help it, I’ve tried. I might need therapyMay 20, 2014 – 12:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - And this is why I heart you. 🙂May 20, 2014 – 11:23 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - I should have read this earlier, shouldn’t I? Had I done so, Regardless of the time of day, I am always with you on the grammar front. I know I make a mistake more often than not on the “… and I” front. I, yes, sometimes say/type I when it should be me.
    What annoys me to no end? “I seen….” No you didn’t. You SAW. Thank you. Over and out.May 20, 2014 – 12:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH Kelly! “I seen…” is awful. Like bleeding ears awful. And we all make mistakes of course!!May 20, 2014 – 7:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Roy - THIS! All of it! A resounding YES! This stuff drives me bonkers. I am a self proclaimed Grammar Nazi and as bad as I feel about standing in grammatical judgement, I admit I do it. I used to go to a therapist who said “irregardless” and I couldn’t take her seriously.May 20, 2014 – 3:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You went to a therapist who said “irregardless???” Did you ever correct her and if you did, did she tell you that you have more issues than she would have otherwise? Intrigued. Thanks, Linda!May 20, 2014 – 7:42 pmReplyCancel

      • Linda Roy - Yeah! Funny, huh? She did it SO many times. Believe me, I was DYING to say something. But i think I’d already straightened her rug and repositioned her picture frames so many times, I thought that would push her over the edge.May 20, 2014 – 7:47 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Seriously – that would have driven me nuts, too but I’m grinning at the idea of you going to your therapist’s office and straightening her rug and picture frames because that’s just plain old awesome.May 20, 2014 – 7:51 pmReplyCancel

          • LInda Roy - I actually thought she was awesome. She was funny. That one thing bugged me – and she was kind of a crazy cat lady – but she was a gem.

            I asked her once if she messed up the frames and the rug on purpose before I came in, since I have OCD, just to see what I’d do. She looked at me with this real deadpan expression and said “May-beeee…” lolMay 20, 2014 – 7:55 pm

        • Kristi Campbell - OMG I LOVE the deadpan “maybeeee” hahahah she sounds really cool. Except for the cat thing, because I’m way allergic. Of course.May 20, 2014 – 11:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - I love this. I am currently wondering what sent you over the grammatical edge, but I love this!

    And here’s the part where I admit that I still have to proofread myself for its/it’s. I know the rule. I understand the rule. I still chronically type it incorrectly. Apparently my fingers don’t know the rule.May 20, 2014 – 5:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA I’m sent over the edge every day but just bury it until I um, explode a little bit? When it comes down to it, I realize that language is a means to get a point across, and if that happens, who cares about grammar and stuff, right? And mostly, I try to believe that but UGH I can’t stand it when I see “your welcome” and stuff like that.
      HAHA to your fingers not knowing the rule. My fingers have certain words that they can never ever spell. Like exaggeration, and jewelry. Like just now? I tried exaggeration three different ways before spell-check told me “ok you’re good, dummy.” 😉May 20, 2014 – 7:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Real Life Parenting - Whenever I hear or see anyone make these errors, they immediately lose smart cred (if they had any to begin with). I know I’m not perfect, but dude. Seriously.

    Grammar matters!May 21, 2014 – 9:24 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - IKNOWRIGHT? I am very very very far from perfect but “irregardless?” Ick.May 21, 2014 – 10:25 amReplyCancel

  • Don - Irregardless is the worst. People who say irregardless should be catapulted to the moon. I love calling people out on grammar stupidity. I wish it was my job. Lol.May 21, 2014 – 4:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Now that would be a fun job. I get to do it at work, sometimes. Jealous? They don’t let me have handcuffs though, so maybe we’re even.May 21, 2014 – 7:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - How did I miss this?!?! Probably all that real life stuff that has put me weeks behind on my reading! This is so funny, but oh, so true. It drives me nuts, too. I’m sure I screw up every once in a while even thought I try very hard not to. I see this pretty consistently, though so I’m very glad you decided to put it out there and illustrate it for us 🙂 Love it!!May 22, 2014 – 1:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m behind, too, Sandy! We went to Tennessee and the wifi was spotty and well, I’m catching up a little this afternoon. Thanks so much and happy Memorial Day!May 26, 2014 – 5:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - I have the worst grammar on the net.
    Don’t shun me.May 23, 2014 – 5:18 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Thank goodness I don’t write like I talk – because I totally say could of, would of, should of. That paragraph really make me laugh. Now I’m going to be all paranoid and annunciate my haves.

    I don’t say this out loud and I don’t think I’ve seen it written but I hate to hear someone say, idear. Like, “I think that’s an excellent idear.” My husband has a made up word that embarasses me, he’s says “rether”. I need to ask him how he spells it. He uses it in the place of “whether” and “rather”.

    Ex: Would you rether have vanilla or strawberry?
    Ex. I doesn’t matter rether I have vanilla or strawberry.

    Are you laughing?May 24, 2014 – 3:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kenya! I saw this in the car on our way back from Tennessee and was laughing so hard that my son told me to be quiet! HA. I’d much rether have vanilla, too. I’ve heard “idear” before – same with “warsh” for “warshing the clothes.” I can just picture you walking around saying “I would HAVE cleaned the fish tank but would rether have Christopher do it!” 😀May 26, 2014 – 5:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Hahahaha. I try so hard not to make these errors on my blog especially because it can annoy people and let’s face it, I do want to write properly. I loved the humor in your grammatical lessons, too!May 25, 2014 – 4:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerith Stull - I’m so glad I’m not the only one who goes crazy seeing words misused! Bring on the grammar police!!May 26, 2014 – 3:50 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Definitely not alone in going crazy seeing misused words, Kerith! HAHA 😀May 26, 2014 – 5:33 pmReplyCancel

  • April - LOL! I hate these grammatical errors. If I think I even typed any of these wrongs (except the haves and regardless), I say them out loud to double check! To fix all of them are so simple, it’s ridiculous! Thanks for sharing with Countdown in Style!May 26, 2014 – 11:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Seana Turner - The one that drives me crazy is when people use the wrong pronoun with the word “than”… as in “She is taller than me” The correct grammar is “She is taller than I.” If people would finish the sentence by adding the verb, it would be obvious “She is taller than I AM”February 10, 2015 – 7:10 amReplyCancel

  • Morley Mary - I really completely enjoyed this. I frankly don’t know just how can you produce these type of top quality posts each opportunity!
    It type of reminded me of https://trollacademy.org, yet this seems to have
    evened the score extra particular. Thanks forever discussing
    your current knowledge!July 26, 2020 – 11:09 amReplyCancel

When I think about the nice things that people have done for me, it’s hard to separate them from the bigBIGthings that have made an impact on my life but didn’t necessarily stem from kindness.  When I think about the nicest things that I have been blessed to receive, they include the following. The woman […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
email a friend

  • Janine Huldie - Weel said and put and come you know we love you and your blog, too. Seriously, I totally can’t imagine not reading your blog now or ever. So, thank you for always be willing to share with us here! 🙂May 15, 2014 – 10:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Janine! I didn’t know what I was going to write until the last second but then it was easy to think of nice things and kindness.May 16, 2014 – 4:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Hi Kristi: As always, you’ve knocked it out of the park. I really connected with this: “The kindness that we absorb, and the kindness we learn matters.” Somehow, I read it, and said to myself: yup, she’s totally right.

    And BTW, you are not alone. Not by a long shot!!

    AMay 15, 2014 – 10:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Anna!!! I think that the kindness that we learn really does matter…. it’s so easy to forget about all of the amazing things that happen all around us and to us, and the important feel goods that we’re so blessed to experience. I hope you have an amazing weekend!May 16, 2014 – 4:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate (Shakespeare's Mom) - So, so beautiful. I LOVE the idea that even if we don’t remember every kindness with our brains, we remember “with our souls, with our bodies, and in our actions.” That is so very true, and what a lovely way to think about it.May 15, 2014 – 10:39 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Hey, I’m super happy that you think it’s nice that I read your blog and came to hear you speak. But listen here, I read your blog and I came to hear you speak because you have opened yourself up and what you write has tremendous impact on how I manage. You’ve let me know that someone out there feels the same way I do. Plus, you’re fun and funny.
    So far (and I think I’m three in so hardly a representative sample) it’s interesting that’s it’s the day to day for so many of us. No isolated enormous gift but small signs on a regular basis that add up to something truly amazing.May 15, 2014 – 10:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sarah,
      I’m super happy that you do read my blog and came to hear Listen to Your Mother but thank you so much for thinking I’m helpful AND fun AND funny! I think you’re pretty awesome too. It’s true that it’s the day to day stuff so often – I couldn’t think of anything HUGE except my husband knocking me up, and obviously, he won there too. 😉May 16, 2014 – 5:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - I love this Kristi and I could not agree with you more! I met a mom today for coffee, who found me through my blog and she desperately (I believe) just wanted some one to be kind to her and her son, and I remember that feeling and was so honored to be able to pay it forward.

    BTW – I can’t wait to read/hear you LTYM piece. Email me at let me know how it went!May 15, 2014 – 11:01 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allie,
      I love that you met a mom for coffee today who found you through your blog! I love when I get to meet – or speak on the phone to – IRL moms who just need somebody to remind them that life can still be beautiful with a diagnosis, it’s just going to be different.
      I’ll post the YouTube video when it comes out sometime this summer!!! (LTYM)
      Happy Friday, friend!May 16, 2014 – 5:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Don - You’re exactly right about this! I was racking my brain trying to think of that one really nice thing that a person had done for me, when all along, it’s the million little nice things that people do that make life so great sometimes. You’ve been nice to me many times and I’m glad we’re online friends, even without benefits. Hahaha, what!?? Lol.May 15, 2014 – 11:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Did you hurt yourself racking your brain? But yeah, it’s the little things, like making hookers cry and you’ve been nice to me, too, so thanks for that.
      I’m glad we’re online friends too, and haha, perv.May 16, 2014 – 5:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzy - Muddle-Headed Mamma - Such beautiful sentiment Kristi, as always 🙂 I love the way that you look at the concept of deserving kindness from both angles; that all of us are both undeserving and deserving. I think sometimes the person who it’s hardest of all to be kind to is ourselves. Your friend Joanna sounds like a friend indeed 🙂May 16, 2014 – 3:43 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lizzy, you’re SO right that it’s the very hardest to be kind to ourselves. It’s much too easy to be down on ourselves and yes, Joanna is an awesome friend. Truly.May 16, 2014 – 5:59 pmReplyCancel

  • The Dose of Reality - Oh, I am typing this through tears, Kristi. We do remember kindness in our bones. It stays with us forever. When people go that extra mile to treat others with kindess, it makes all the difference in the world. It changes lives. I’m so glad I read this today!! –LisaMay 16, 2014 – 8:29 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, sorry, Lisa! I agree though that kindness changes lives and has a huge ripple effect on the whole wide world. Here’s to kindness! And to it being Friday!!May 16, 2014 – 6:01 pmReplyCancel

  • christine - Spot on. I have nothing to add. You said it all beautifully and better than I could.May 16, 2014 – 8:47 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I think I have found a lot of kindness in this here blogging world. And I needed it. I remember just about every kindness of my life, so I really make sure to practice acts of kindness because people will remember!May 16, 2014 – 9:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tamara,
      I think the blogging world is full of kind and amazing people. Real life can be, too, which is pretty awesome. And yes, people will remember!!!May 16, 2014 – 6:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - The kindest thing is someone showing you how to believe in yourself. Because you rock. You are there for others be it IRL, in text, in blog. Because some one in time showed you what an awesome gift you are. To the world. Awesome finish to the sentence my friendMay 16, 2014 – 9:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kerri, so true that somebody helping us to believe in ourselves is the Very Best Kindness. All of us are gifts to the world, and I’m so glad that you, my awesome friend, are a part of my world.May 16, 2014 – 6:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - That is one of the best, most impossible things to describe about blogging to people who don’t do it. Have I mentioned how excited I am to real life meet you in a few weeks????May 16, 2014 – 9:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree Jean! And I’m SO SO excited to meet YOU in a few weeks!! YAY for IRL meeting!May 16, 2014 – 6:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - While life isn’t always fair, I do believe that we often get back what we give. Not always, but enough. People do nice things for you because you are deserving, and because you are awesome. That makes it easy.May 16, 2014 – 11:11 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana,
      I think that we get back most of what we give, too. Karma or whatever and AWWW thank you for thinking I’m awesome. I think you’re pretty awesome right back.May 16, 2014 – 6:09 pmReplyCancel

  • karen - (((HUGS))) LOVE THIS SO MUCH! What wonderful things you have experienced and been given. Bloggers have welcomed me with open arms and I love being a part of this world.

    Just one kind act can make the biggest differnce in someone’s life. I always think that my smile or please/thank you to a person having a bad day just may change their attitude when they go home. POerhaps they will use kind words towards their kids or spouse and it keeps moving forward.May 16, 2014 – 11:14 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for the HUGS, Karen!! I love being a part of the blogging world too and of COURSE they’ve welcomed you with open arms because you’re fabulous! Here’s to kind gestures moving forward and going on and on and on…May 16, 2014 – 6:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris at Hye Thyme Cafe - Yup, whether we are conscious of it or not, all those kindnesses paid to us seep in and accumulate and bubble out every now and again, letting us “pay it forward” in some way to someone else in need at the moment. 🙂May 16, 2014 – 1:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle @ A Dish of Daily Life - Sometimes the littlest things are the nicest and make a difference. I hope in some small way that I repay the kindnesses that have been done to me. Reading this was lovely…you are never alone! I hope you know that.May 16, 2014 – 2:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree, Michelle. I do know (mostly) that I’m never alone but thank you for the reminder and I love that it’s the little things that matter and make a difference.May 16, 2014 – 6:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Joanna - Oh, Wow! I don’t know what to say. I just clicked on your blog as usual but was not prepared. Thanks so much! And of course, you know, that you have been there for me in so many very important, needed ways. Thank YOU.May 16, 2014 – 2:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Joanna, your comment made me smile bighuge and you ARE truly awesome and wonderful and fabulous and amazing and I’m so so glad to have your friendship (and that Tucker and Michael are such cool friends, too). Here’s to YOU and your awesomeness. xoMay 16, 2014 – 6:14 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - That is the best bib ever! I’m reading a book with a groups at churn height now calld “Love Does.” We just started, but the basic principle is that Love is an action word – you have to DO something to show love. I think kindness is a similar concept. Being kind is an action -doesn’t have to be big, though. Sometimes, it’s small things that make the biggest difference and sometimes we don’t even know the impact those little acts of kindness have on others.May 16, 2014 – 7:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I know, right? A friend saw it and thought of me and sent it. Tucker has had some of the best bibs and tshirts ever, I need to do a refresh to get him some funny ones (not bibs obvi) now so that he’s not always wearing a spiderman or iron man or batman tshirt! (LONG sleeved sigh – an obsession).
      I love the idea of kindness and love being actions and think that it’s so true. Must read this book you’re talking about because I really do think that we remember actions so much more than words….
      Thanks, you. XOMay 16, 2014 – 10:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle AKA Crumpets and Bollocks - You are right a lot of times we don’t think we deserve kindness. I do that a lot. I don’t like to accept any kind of “help,” even when I ask for it. It’s like I don’t embrace the kindness offered, or I push it away, because on a deep subconscious level, I feel like I don’t deserve it, especially when I don’t think I can return the favor. I might complain that I’ve had to pay friends to help out, like that’s somehow their fault, but then I realized, wait, I pay them even when they don’t want the money because I don’t think I deserve the charity. Insightful. Do you need my health insurance information to bill them for this session?May 16, 2014 – 9:07 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Michelle,
      BY THE WAY!!! Cool new blog name!! Big cool.
      Isn’t it dumb that we think we don’t deserve kindness? I mean, when I think about deserving it, I’m all “YES, yes, I do.” But then, when I think about actually receiving it, I feel weird and awkward and totally undeserving. Ach.
      And yes, please forward your health insura….. NO, I do NOT need your health insurance info because I am kind! And so are you! And, we’re in this together, having both escaped our mom’s PH. mmm hmmm.May 16, 2014 – 10:56 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I love your list of kindnesses, including us blog readers. 🙂 Had I finished the sentence this week, I wouldn’t have been able to list just one thing either. And, I think we’re fortunate that we DO have a list, because I believe that people who receive kindnesses (yikes, is that a word?) are the ones who give them the most.May 16, 2014 – 9:43 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, I think you’re right that receiving kindnesses (and totally a word – at least now if not before?) do end up giving more because they’re so very very appreciated. I was going to write about being thankful for knowing some grammar, and this started as the serious intro, but then? Well. The grammar seemed to not matter. Hope you and the boys are having a great weekend!May 17, 2014 – 8:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Bianca @ Rant Rave Crave - You really nailed it when you said we all deserve kindness but feel like we don’t deserve it after being damaged so. WE DO need it. We sadly go through so much crap that yes, we need to embrace that kindness we receive ever so tight!May 16, 2014 – 9:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Bianca, we DO need it. I wish we ALWAYS got it during the times when we need it the very most, but I like to believe that we can hold it inside ourselves for when we feel like there’s none out there because those days are just, well. Dark. And here’s to embracing it so tightly, and to remembering it when we really need it! Damaged and all. Hope you’re having a great weekend!May 17, 2014 – 8:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - Another beautiful post, Kristi. I would have given anything to hear you at LTYM. I’ll bet you were amazing. Congratulations for being a part of such an incredible group of writers. You deserve to be there! XOMay 16, 2014 – 11:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Marcia, I would have LOVED LOVED LOVED for you to be there. It was so amazing – just really, really incredible. It was better than I thought it was going to be. There was something super powerful about people reading such personal stories. One of these days, it’ll be near you and I’ll come see you perform!May 17, 2014 – 8:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Caroline - What a beautiful post! <3May 17, 2014 – 10:33 amReplyCancel

  • Shay from Trashy Blog - I love it, you sentimental skank, you. And I miss you. I’ve been writing my skanky little heart on my blog while working 3 jobs that let me be with my kids most of the day, so that has left little time for catching up on my favorite blogs. But I’m thinking this summer I’ll have a little extra time…I hope to start visiting more often!!May 17, 2014 – 4:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - SHAY! I’ve been getting your trashy shorts and reading them on my phone (because I am a loyal subscriber, if not a loyal commenter) and I’m SO GLAD you’re back. Also you always pick the not-funny ones. What’s up with that? Aliens came to visit me recently, and you come to the sentimental skank ones. I miss you too. Ho.
      3 jobs? I hope at least one has free beer, because, well. Yikes.May 17, 2014 – 8:38 pmReplyCancel

  • April - Oh my! Those are some wonderful and kind things. I definitely feel more of a community with my online friends, since my “real” friends live so far away now. You have been a warm part of my day reading your comments. To appreciate the life and the love you have been given is truly a blessing.May 17, 2014 – 8:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Most of my friends live far away as well but I’ve met some really amazing people through Tucker’s school the past couple of years – one of whom is Joanna, mentioned here. I agree that the online community is amazing and being able to appreciate the love we’re given is the BEST blessing. Hope you’re having a great weekend, April!!May 18, 2014 – 12:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Nj Rongner - Older I get, the more I realize that kindness matters so much! The little things turn into big things.May 18, 2014 – 9:05 pmReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - You are so right. About all of it. About how kindness make’s a difference, no matter what kind it is. No matter if someone notices or not.
    I try to teach that to Isaiah, I think it is a huge important lesson for kids.
    I am glad I found your blog 🙂
    TTTx10May 18, 2014 – 10:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - It’s a huge lesson for kids and I’m so glad that I found YOU.
      TTTx10, Jen. Big and huge.June 2, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - This right here is one crazy beautiful post, Kristi. But I’m never really surprised by that. One of the best things I ever did for myself was read your blog. You are so down to earth, so real, so kind and you rock as a mom and an advocate. I wish I could have seen you at LTYM. I know it would have been spectacular!
    I will say this, I find in life that you get what you give. So there you have it 🙂May 19, 2014 – 8:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG I can’t believe I didn’t see this at the time. What an amazing compliment from such an incredible woman and writer, Sandy. Thank you. thank you HUGE BIG HUGEST of all.June 2, 2014 – 11:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Love this post Kristi, so glad to have met you along the blog way, looking forward to the IRL way one day too.May 19, 2014 – 1:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - At first, I did not want to be a part of this show but was talked in to auditioning. When I was accepted and my piece got torn into shreds, I thought that it wasn’t worth my time. I’m so glad that I stuck to my guns because this experience was…I can’t even put it into words.
    Everyone has a story of hardships. We may think that they are not important but people are listening and connecting. So proud of you and can’t wait to watch you live-ish xoxoMay 23, 2014 – 5:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know Kim, they were initially ick with you, but YOU hung in there and then read and read and made people feel and made them thankful. For you. Your voice. YOU. xoxoxoxoxoxooJune 2, 2014 – 11:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - I’ve been far too absent in my reading here – catching up today, obviously! This is so true, Kristi. And I can tell you that a little kindness can go a very long way…just as well as a lack of kindness shown can have such a huge impact. I know this all too well right now and it just burns me. Long story. But I love this – and you! Hope to be reading more regularly very soon! 🙂May 31, 2014 – 2:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I get when life gets in the way. You’re so right too that kindness, and the lack of it, has such gigantic unseen affects. Sorry that you’re dealing with the icky part of it..June 2, 2014 – 11:56 pmReplyCancel

  • paid interests - Wham bam thank you, ma’am, my questions are answered!September 24, 2014 – 11:38 amReplyCancel

Today’s Our Land Series post was written by my friend Zoe of Rewritten. Zoe is one of those very rare blog friends who remember moments, reaches out, and privately offers encouragement and support. I admire her a lot, and appreciate her friendship so much. I’m sure I don’t do a very good job of letting […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • zoe - Thanks so much Kristi…for your kind words and of course your friendship. You did a fabulous job in presenting this…you made my words visually beautiful. ..thank you! LZMay 13, 2014 – 8:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Zoe,
      Your words are beautiful all by themselves. Thank you so much for sharing part of your and Tseering’s story with Our Land. Huge hugs to you, my brave and wonderful friend. The hugest.
      xoMay 14, 2014 – 12:05 amReplyCancel

  • Don - What a lovely post. We often forget how lucky we are to be free to think and even express our opinions on most anything, without fearing for our lives. This man sounds like somebody who would have been a pleasure to spend even a small amount of time with, so maybe you were fortunate to have the time together you did. I’m sorry for the void in your life and wish you the best with your book and future life.May 13, 2014 – 9:16 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks so much Don. We really do have the luxury of forgetting how lucky we are to live as we do. Tseering was someone that everyone loved to be around. He was a paradox at times and I feel that knowing him was one of the great gifts in my life. Thanks so much for your well wishes too!May 13, 2014 – 9:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Part of me was so saddened to read this tonight and yet another part of me now has so much hope for you in moving in on, as well. Totally two sides to this, I suppose, but I do get the need to move forward and am so very proud and humbled by all you have gone through to get to this point. Thank you again for sharing with us more about this here tonight.May 13, 2014 – 9:19 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks Janine, The saddness can be pervasive and Im glad you can see hope in this telling. I am torn between moving forward and finding out more but know that I am not likely to ever know more… its time… Thanks so much.May 13, 2014 – 9:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - The Latchkey Mom - Wow, wow, wow! What a breathtaking story. Zoë, my heart goes out to you. Grief is such an suffocating emotion at times and I can’t even imagine what all the uncertainty must have added to your pain. God bless you.May 13, 2014 – 9:48 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Its true . I of course always felt for people whose loved ones fell victim to crimes and were never found or MIA, but it really is an experience you don’t have any grasp of until it happens. I so feel for families of the missing.Thanks so much… I will grab any blessings I can get!May 14, 2014 – 6:35 amReplyCancel

  • Katia - Constructing someone’s personality in a post, using only words and no images is not an easy task but through your words, Zoe, I almost felt Tseering’s presence and I am so saddened by this. I feel like this is not only your loss but all of ours. You wrote beautifully about him and about not giving in. I think that what you’re doing by deliberately stepping back is the opposite of giving in. Giving in is assuming a passive position where you just let things happen, whereas you’ve made a deliberate choice in order to protect yourself. I will hope and pray for a miracle.May 13, 2014 – 10:05 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks so much Katia! I hope people really have a concept of what a gentle soul he was. That hand thing was so damn cute when he did it!May 14, 2014 – 6:36 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Zoe, I was eager to read another telling of your story tonight. I could read it again tomorrow. This is a series of events wholly foreign and unfamiliar to me, and I’ve lived abroad (even in Asia), but always as an expat, and therefore, distant. I would love to read more sometime about how you met, and that Thanksgiving dinner, and your life together with all its cultural differences. If that’s not too painful. Thank you for sharing more.May 13, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks Sarah, So many people have very little concept of what is really happening in Tibet and elsewhere. I think its our ability to live in our own world of privilege but also what we are fed in this country by the media et al… people think Tibet and think peaceful meditation not people self immolating to become independent..The point about living abroad is also very true that somehow we can always ( no matter who we are) be shielded if its not our native country. Thanks so much for wanting to read it… If you click Kristis intro at the top where is says about the book some of it is on rewritten … or just go there and hit the Book page at the top!May 14, 2014 – 6:41 amReplyCancel

  • celeste - I’m doing that thing where I delete everything I write because I’m so moved by this post that I have no idea what to say. So I will leave it at that, plus add that I am listening, and so very grateful that I had the opportunity to read this tonight.

    Thank you both for sharing.May 14, 2014 – 2:45 amReplyCancel

    • zoe - hahahahha Celeste, I know exactly what you mean! I have done that more often than not …. especially here at Kristi’s blog! Thanks so much for reading and commenting!May 14, 2014 – 6:42 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - When people think of Tibet they think of Everest. Never understanding that it is way more dangerous being off the Step than on it. We take for granted the life our immigrants lived before they tried to find safety here. That he willingly gave his new life up for his brother speaks volumes of his character, love and devotion. you were so lucky to have known him and therefore your loss is so immense. Peace to you.May 14, 2014 – 10:08 amReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks so much Kerri, there are certain things of which I am sure and one is that I am better , soooo much better, for having known him.May 14, 2014 – 12:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - What an incredible story! Thank you for sharing with us. I am so sorry for your loss and for the struggles Tseering endured. Here in America, we have so many freedoms and, sadly, we tend to take them for granted – until we hear such moving stories as this one. Definitely wishing you peace and healing.May 14, 2014 – 10:13 amReplyCancel

    • zoe - thanks Lisa, We are fortunate and may take things for granted but I dont think there is a place on Earth that is immune from that… even in places we think may be miserable … those who live there take certain things for granted I am sure. Thanks for your thoughts …. I will take all the peace I can get!May 14, 2014 – 12:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Rena McDaniel-The Diary of an Alzheimer's Caregiver - What a moving story! I believe this will stay with me for a long time. You are a very brave woman and I am so sorry for your loss. Thank you for sharing this story.May 14, 2014 – 10:39 amReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks Rena. Just to increase awareness is enough… Im sure you are familiar with the same and the struggles of caregiving…Thanks so much for reading.May 14, 2014 – 12:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Robbie K (@momma23monkeys) - What an amazing story of love and bravery and passion and loss. I am so sorry for the heartbreak you have suffered.May 14, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks Robbie. It was a heartbreak and who knows maybe it will let up some day… He was a brave guy.May 14, 2014 – 12:11 pmReplyCancel

  • christine - Dagnabbit, I’m speechless. And I can’t even just say FRIST to cover it up.
    How I wish I could sit with you and Skip and just have a nice, long chat.May 14, 2014 – 1:00 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - well c’mon over any time… we will chat over cookies, doggie biscuits and tea…and you can bring bacon if you want!May 14, 2014 – 3:07 pmReplyCancel

  • Natalie D - When I think of strength, peace and perseverance, I think of you, Zoe. Thank you for again sharing your story.May 14, 2014 – 3:58 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - Thanks Nat…sometimes I think its just brute force and ignorance of knowing when to roll over…congrats on blogher btw!!!May 14, 2014 – 4:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Eli@coachdaddy - 1. Kristi – thank you so much for hosting Zoe.

    2. Zoe – this is an incredible love story. The word that comes to mind when I think of the description you’ve given us of Tseering is “noble.” And we as men should hope life gives us an opportunity for true nobility at some point.

    3. I get the sense his character and adoration had a profound impact on you; don’t discount what your character and adoration meant to him.May 14, 2014 – 10:15 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - Whatva lovely thing to remember ….thanks sooo much for reminding me of that!May 14, 2014 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Wow! I scrolled up to see if anyone else left a speechless one word comment. So I didn’t want to be the one to be the one 😉 But wow. Really – wow!May 15, 2014 – 1:44 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - Thanks Kenya…it has definitely been a wow experience. ..I can appreciate the shock.May 15, 2014 – 1:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Zoe, to this day this story sits on my blog and in my heart. It is still the most beautiful and heartbreaking love story to me, possibly because I know the incredible author. I cannot imagine what this has put you through. I am so sorry that he is gone. I am so sorry that your story won’t continue. But I am so grateful for the time the two of you had together and I think, from the way you describe him, he would be okay with the idea of you taking a rest.

    Kristi, thank you for having Zoe here and giving her a place to continue her story.May 17, 2014 – 10:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Zoe, I’ve read your story before and I am still stunned by its beauty and its tragedy. You are one tough and beautiful lady, my friend! I completely understand your need, your choice to “step away from the flames.” You are so right – sometimes you just gotta take care of you. So do that – always. 🙂May 31, 2014 – 2:16 pmReplyCancel

    • zoe - hey Lisa thanks so much. I’m always surprised when people are still finding this but I’m really happy they are because it makes me feel better about stepping back. Really thanks so much I do appreciate it!May 31, 2014 – 4:31 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Well, it’s my own stepping back that is the reason I’m finding this so late! I completely understand.May 31, 2014 – 4:33 pmReplyCancel

        • zoe - Awesome. ..love that!May 31, 2014 – 4:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Danndy - Oh.my.gosh. Just when I think your pictures cnonat GET more brilliant, you go and produce something like THIS?!?!?!?!?!?!? AMAZING!!!! I love them so much! I cnonat stop looking at the closed-eyed laugh .SOOOOOO cute!!!February 22, 2016 – 2:59 amReplyCancel

You may notice that this post has a bit of a different voice than the ones you’re used to reading on Finding Ninee. My husband Robert wrote it, in response to this week’s Finish the Sentence Friday prompt of “Dear Mom…” —  From a dad, who thinks his wife gave his special needs son the […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Dana - Damn Robert, that was even better than a post from Kristi! And that is saying A LOT. You made me cry. This is the best Mother’s Day gift a mom and wife could ask for – just beautiful. But you should get Kristi something pretty too 😉May 8, 2014 – 10:08 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey wait! Even better than mine? Fine. Maybe. But I agree – it’s an amazing Mother’s Day gift and yes, he should still get me something pretty. 😉May 9, 2014 – 1:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Oh wow…I’m kind of speechless over here. Looks like you’ve already got a fabulous mom’s day gift – a beautiful post written by your loving husband. 🙂 However, if he still wants to make you breakfast in bed, buy you flowers, and insist that you spend a few hours to yourself on Sunday, I’m all for that too! Seriously though, never stop dreaming for that gorgeous son of yours. When I watch mine play high school basketball – a team sport that we never thought he could play — I know that dreams for and about our kids can come true.May 8, 2014 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily,
      I love that Big Dude plays high school basketball. He’s an inspiration to me (as are you, with your wise words that Robert should also give me some time alone this Mother’s Day). xxMay 9, 2014 – 1:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Kristi, I’m officially in love with your husband. Don’t tell David. But seriously in love with a man who thinks his wife is his hero. His and his sons and gets that without you it wouldn’t be perfect. Adore this, him, you, Tucker just everything. Robert hit it out of the park for this Mother’s Day present. Makes up for not putting the seat down for sure.May 8, 2014 – 10:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Kerri! I won’t tell David. You should make him write a post for you. I’ve only been asking Robert to write one since um, December 2013? And yeah, Robert gets a pass on the toilet seat not being down this weekend for sure. Thanks, you.May 9, 2014 – 1:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Definitely have to agree with Robert on this one and say you are the best mom to Tucker and I know in the end he will let you know in his own way that he knows this, too. Beautiful and love that Robert wrote this here for you tonight. Happy Mother’s Day, Kristi!May 8, 2014 – 10:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Janine! I love that Robert wrote this for me, too. Happy Mother’s Day to you, too, friend! I hope your weekend is amazing.May 9, 2014 – 1:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Anna Fitfunner - Awwww….so great to see how in tune your hubby is with both you and your son! It’s also really inspiring to see your husband’s vision for his son and his family! Have a great Mom’s Day!May 8, 2014 – 10:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Anna! I enjoyed seeing his vision for Tucker, too. Happy Mom’s day! 😀May 9, 2014 – 1:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - Omg crying. You two were definitely made for one another. I can’t wait to see what tucker does!May 8, 2014 – 10:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Deb. I can’t see what Tucker does either! Happy Mother’s Day!May 9, 2014 – 1:52 pmReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - Well this is quite the post! Ya hit it right out of the park. Nicely done buddy. Oh how I wish I could push the fast forward button and zip forward to see which one of the three scenarios will come true. Here’s hoping they all do! Please pass on my very good wishes for a Happy Mother’s Day to Tucker’s mom.May 8, 2014 – 10:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree that he hit it out of the park, Kelly! He’s going to love all these comments. And I hope your Mother’s Day is amazing. I look forward to seeing what Tucker does, but hope it doesn’t speed by as quickly as the last almost five years has!May 9, 2014 – 1:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Bianca @ Rant Rave Crave - Your husband is quite the writer! This post may have gotten me misty eyed.May 9, 2014 – 12:32 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, thanks, Bianca. I’m sure he’ll appreciate your kind words. Possibly, even rub them in my face. Kidding! sortof…May 9, 2014 – 1:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - Awwwwwww Tucker’s Dad! I LOVED this!! Love seeing your insight into Tucker’s future with all the hopes and dreams of two loving parents. You guys are wonderful! This was super sweet. I love that Tucker is going to be 6’4. He already looks quite tall for his age 😉 Let’s pretend ya’ll are sixty and I’m still 50 something. Can I get tickets to the game?May 9, 2014 – 6:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I loved it too, Kenya! And seeing Robert’s hopes for Tucker’s future is just plain old sweet. And he is SO tall for his age! He’s HUGE. People always think he’s six or seven (he’ll be five this summer). And yes to getting tickets to the game! 😀May 9, 2014 – 2:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - It’s a totally different voice but somehow also the same. I have to agree with Deb and everyone else. What a beautiful and uplifting love letter to Tucker and his mom! It’s so wonderful to meet your husband and know that you are both in such great loving hands. And so is Tucker.xoMay 9, 2014 – 7:24 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Katia. I’m so glad he finally agreed to do a guest post!! He wrote it really quickly, too, which made me question my skills.May 9, 2014 – 2:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Lizzy - Muddle-Headed Mamma - Wow, this just gave me goosebumps! Looks like both Tucker’s parents are talented writers. Happy Mother’s Day for Sunday, Kristi!May 9, 2014 – 8:19 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Wow, Robert, you just made me tear up. Excellent post!May 9, 2014 – 8:49 amReplyCancel

  • That Girl Ryan - How did you get your husband to write a post? I’m jealous, this is beautiful. He should think about becoming a blogger himself. Now, I’m expecting a VLOG from Tucker. Happy Mother’s Day to you!May 9, 2014 – 9:04 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Girl Ryan, I asked him to write a post like a year and 1/2 ago, when my blog was new. He finally got around to it when I told him a month ago that this was the sentence. Also? I told him it was going live last Thursday. You know, in case. He’s too addicted to his video games to blog. But the VLOG from Tucker – now THAT would be awesome!!May 9, 2014 – 2:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I would type some profound comment if I could see the keyboard through my tears. Simply beautiful!May 9, 2014 – 9:09 amReplyCancel

  • Jean - I can’t see the keyboard… I have something in my eye…

    Kristi, what a lucky boy your son is to have two talented parents who care so much for him and clearly, so much for each other. Your husband did a fantastic job.May 9, 2014 – 9:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jean, I agree that Robert did an amazing job and thank you so very much!! We’re lucky to have such a wonderful little boy!May 9, 2014 – 2:13 pmReplyCancel

  • karen - I thought you made me cry…now I am sobbing beyond words…I love your husband’s post…what a great man, husband, and father.May 9, 2014 – 9:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry Karen. I love his post, too, and agree that he’s a great father and husband!May 9, 2014 – 2:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie - What a lovely gift. It’s clear that you are treasured by your family.May 9, 2014 – 10:47 amReplyCancel

  • christine - Why’d you have to go and make me cry?? Well done, Robert. Methinks you’re getting lucky one day soon. 🙂May 9, 2014 – 11:06 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Well. It looks like you both are brilliant writers/thinkers!
    This kid. This Tucker. He’s got it MADE.
    And he has a pretty awesome photographer too. (I hope!)May 9, 2014 – 1:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tamara,
      Yeah, this kid. Tucker’s definitely got a lot of love and is going to have the best photographer in the world in a short month!!!May 9, 2014 – 2:16 pmReplyCancel

  • Marcia @ Menopausal Mother - I have goose bumps and tears after reading this. More beautiful than I can say. Kristi, you are one very lucky mother and wife. Happy Mother’s day, my friend. XOMay 9, 2014 – 8:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi Campbell - Awe, Marcia. Thank you. He’s not very perfect most of the time but I agree that he nailed this, and happy Mother’s Day to you, too, my awesome pal.May 9, 2014 – 10:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Kristi, you should have Robert hijack your blog more often! That was simply incredible. I knew from the title it would be touching but I had no idea…
    I am crying happy tears. This is the most beautiful Mother’s Day tribute. You are so blessed as a wife and mom!
    Tell Robert thank you and I for one am with him 100%. You are the best! XOXOMay 10, 2014 – 6:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks Sandy! And I would so have him hijack Finding Ninee more often but have been asking him FOREVER to write one so it’ll probably be another year before I get another. Still though, I agree that he rocks and that it’s an awesome Mother’s Day present.May 10, 2014 – 10:09 amReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Wow.
    That’s all I really want to say, but it seems a bit short, so I’ll say I agree with you Robert, that Kristi is an awesome mom.May 10, 2014 – 6:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Yvonne. Not sure about being an awesome mom, but my husband (and my son hopefully) thinking that I am one is enough for me. thanks so much!May 10, 2014 – 10:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Misty - wait a minute while i blink the tears away! that was just awesome to read!May 11, 2014 – 7:09 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie D - Oh man, I love your husband. Can I please adopt him?
    Happy Mother’s Day, Kristi. You are such an inspiration to me.May 11, 2014 – 12:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Natalie,
      He’s pretty great MOST of the time. 😉
      And awww! You’re an amazing inspiration to ME, so thank you so much. I hope you had an amazing weekend!May 12, 2014 – 6:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Oh my goodness! I loved the football section! I’m a big Dallas Cowboy fan with my husband. I simply love how your hubby believes that you have done so much for Tucker. I think you have, too. I feel like I know you have by what I read on here. I pray that I will get the opportunity to see how wonderful he becomes as an adult! I hope you’re enjoying this beautiful day!May 11, 2014 – 7:19 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I loved the football section, too, Brittnei! But um Dallas? I’m from Denver. I hope we can still be friends. Thank you so much for your prayers, and for being positive about Tucker’s future. I’m positive, too, but it’s all really scary, knowing that he may be bullied and made fun of… or feel badly about himself. I hope that he can feel the love around him. Always. And thank you.May 16, 2014 – 11:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - That is so sweet! But Tucker sure is going to be busy, what with being an astronaut and a football player, and caring for a family as well! 😉May 11, 2014 – 9:41 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - XO Angel. Tucker might be very busy. But then again, so are you right? I mean TEACHING! Awesome. Like you.May 16, 2014 – 11:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Courtney Conover - This was amazing, Robert, on so many levels. First and foremost, I see that you, much like your lovely wife, have a way with words. (Frankly, you had me at the first sentence, right out the gate, seeing as though my husband is a former NFL player, and I actually posted about his draft day experience last Friday…)

    Here’s the thing: Screw odds. Tucker has what it takes to knock your guys’ socks off, blow expectations out of the water, and is poised to do big things in this world. How can it be any different with parents like you and Kristi?

    Congrats on a magnificent post.May 12, 2014 – 10:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Courtney, I’m behind but hubs will be really excited to read your post about your husband’s draft day experience. I mentioned it to him when I read it but then he was out of town… now, he’s back though. And YAY for your words “SCREW ODDS” thank you for that. Here’s to both of our little men screwing the odds!May 16, 2014 – 11:35 pmReplyCancel

  • Lady Lilith - How touching and inspiring.May 13, 2014 – 9:28 amReplyCancel

  • Rabia @TheLiebers - What a sweet post from an awesome dad!! You all are lucky to have each other!! 🙂May 14, 2014 – 4:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Caroline - aw <3May 15, 2014 – 4:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Sara - SO sweet. Love it.May 26, 2014 – 1:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly H. Smith - OMG Kristi and Robert! This is so beautiful. I have tears in my eyes. I was right there for the whole ride. Awesome. Thank you for sharing on Traffic Jam Weekend. #trafficjamweekendJune 21, 2014 – 3:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Tarana - This is so beautiful! Your husband should write more often 🙂October 2, 2014 – 7:54 amReplyCancel

  • Meredith - So sweet! That husband of yours is a keeper for sure. Loved it!October 2, 2014 – 4:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristina Grum - I love this! We’ve talked about Matt writing for me but he’s never done it. I love the way your husband structured these three possibilities.October 2, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - I had goosebumps! What a lovely post Kristi! He’s definitely for keeps! 🙂October 3, 2014 – 3:48 amReplyCancel

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