Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

Do you guys watch the awards shows? Like you know, the Grammys and the Oscars and whatever other ones there are? I used to. But, now, I don’t even know when they’re on until I find out that they’re already happening and almost over via Twitter. I just don’t care what Angelina is wearing. I […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Sarah Almond - I am proud to be a part of this where two of my friends used the word penis in their posts. BA HA HA! I could totally write a song about this. Don’t worry, I won’t.

    You look good lady-Angelina’s got nothing on you. If I had to choose I’d choose you EVERY stinking time over those silly celebrities. Except Ellen… then I’d have to toss a coin. πŸ˜‰January 29, 2014 – 12:00 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Sarah. I’d actually really like it if you were to write a song about it. Is that weird? And yeah, I’d pick Ellen over me, too. Can’t blame you there.January 29, 2014 – 8:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - I wouldn’t spend 10K on a dress either. On the other hand, I would give ANY amount of money to see and hear you give that speech at an awards show. That would be priceless. Really, though, you and Tucker are priceless and beautiful. Can I say I love you? Fuck, I already did. I’m feeling sentimental right about now. I really like this idea, and I’m in awe of how it looks live. I feel really empowered seeing all of these beautiful mamas in their full glory, including you, including me. Yay, us!January 29, 2014 – 12:11 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - How fun would it be to actually give that speech at an awards show? And thanks for the podium idea – best part of the post (which I’m still editing).
      Awww. I love you too. I really like this idea, too and LOVE how it looks live. We rock, us mamas do. Our wrinkles, our lives, us. We do. We should remember it more often.January 29, 2014 – 8:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - LOL…I literally have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard, Kristi! First the hole in the crotch of the pants, then “This is what I get for asking my hubs to take a pic and him saying ‘YEAH, it came out.'” Then wearing penises on your neck. I can not stop giggling, laughing as it just all hit my funny bone. I took my prescription glasses off and I could see Tucker’s adorable, beaming smile perfectly as he was perched atop your shoulders. I checked out of watching the awards shows a long time ago! And for no make up…you got it going on just fine, our friend! πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 12:19 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, well the taking the glasses off ain’t gonna do much because hubs too a horrible photo…but yay to you getting the penis on the neck thing being not so awesome. The awards shows? WHO CARES?January 29, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - LOL, this is hilarious. But I am confused, I can’t find the chin fat in that picture! I see why you want all those camera lessons, too. For the hubby, right? YIKES! πŸ˜‰ Also: I love the Colorado shirt, and that is serious. I need to get one next time I am there. πŸ™‚ I think Tucker is the best accessory ever. When he’s clothed, of course!January 29, 2014 – 12:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well the angle makes a difference I guess but trust me, it’s there. And hahah to the camera lessons!!! He’s a moron!!!January 29, 2014 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Pretty epic win, wearing Tucker – he’s priceless πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 2:09 amReplyCancel

  • linda Atwell - Out One Ear - I have a hole in the crotch of my sweatpants too! I’m totally amazed that it is there because I could see one opening up between my thighs with all the rubbing that goes on in that area of my body. But I swear, what’s rubbed against the crotch of these pants consistently enough to create a hole? At least I can’t remember anything specific. But that’s all I’m gonna admit to in that regards. I generally wear Lands End because it is comfortable. Other than that, I’m most often seen in yoga pants around the house and a comfy T or layered shirts and zip-up thingees.

    And of course, this whole post cracked me up. Especially the penis part. Happy Tuesday.January 29, 2014 – 2:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - REALLY??? For real, you’ve had a hole in your sweats? I think it happens systematically where they just want us to buy new ones. Little do they know, we have friends in high places with needle and thad.
      I love me some yoga pants but I never wear them. Why? No pockets and I need y phone. Who sucks now???January 29, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • donofalltrades - Hahahahah, Kristi! Penis on the neck indeed. You ain’t got no chin fat but whatever. You look like you used to rock a black concert tshirt pretty good back in the day.January 29, 2014 – 2:37 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dude you wish you saw the concert shirts back then, much better than now but like you said, whatever. And yeah. Pennis on the neck? Not the same when it’s your kid. Also ick to whatever you were thinking anyway.January 29, 2014 – 11:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Hahahaha I love your speech! I just had a blog tour to check all the #WhoAreYOUWearingMom of all the hosts and I am loving this err movement! πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 5:28 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah | LeftBrainBuddha - LOL!! And seriously, you do not have chin fat!!! You look awesome, mama!January 29, 2014 – 6:14 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I do actually have chin fat but I think the photo was feeling guilty for the other stuff…we all look awesome! I’m loving this post.January 30, 2014 – 12:15 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - LOL! I love this – I seriously can’t get organized to blog much right now otherwise I’d be on it. Otherwise here’s what I’m wearing – A shirt from Old Navy that says Slinky – Everybody love slinky. And I’ve got on name brand yoga pants “Champion”. When they were new I tried to wear them with boots but the Champion logo and the bottom of the pants gave me away and I decided I couldn’t pull it off. I am wearing the cutest slippers I just found at JCP on clearance for $6.97. I was really excited. They are name brand too – Isotoner and they have fake leopard fur on them.

    Once upon a time I used to watch those awards shoes from the 6 o’clock hour on to practically midnight. After that I started recording it and fast forwarding through, then after than recording and never watching. Now I don’t even record it.January 29, 2014 – 6:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can imagine the chaos of the kitchen! When we bought the place we’re in now, we did a huge remodel. It was horrible. Buuuuuuttt…the hop will be open until Sunday if you decide that it’s a bummer to miss showing the world your awesome new Isotoners! Everybody loves Slinky! πŸ˜€January 30, 2014 – 8:28 amReplyCancel

  • Jean - Touching, honest, soulful, then penis on the neck. And I wouldn’t want it any other way. Gorgeous, Kristi. I think blurry mom and kid pictures are a genre of their own. We have a bazillion of those on my computer.January 29, 2014 – 9:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ach to the blurry mom kid photos. I still can’t believe the hubs thought that “it turned out!” Doh.January 30, 2014 – 8:29 amReplyCancel

  • Katia - Penis neck illustration killed it! I wish I’d thought of that, as I had many similar incidents, including penis neck’s cousin – butt in face. This was hilarious, I SO enjoyed reading this! As for the wrinkles? Meh. You’re a natural beauty.January 29, 2014 – 9:21 amReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - Crying with laughter!! I am so doing a selfie next year with what I wear for all the awards shows…Hollywood has nothing on my flannel jammies! ;)-AshleyJanuary 29, 2014 – 9:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Flannel Jammies are divine! And we’re doing the hop until Sunday – you guys should join us with some of your Pinterest No’s!!January 30, 2014 – 8:30 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - I’ve seen you in nice clothes, so I can vouch for you on that point. I don’t even know when the Oscars are on, but I know I’ll be wearing pajamas. Really fancy ones from Costco.January 29, 2014 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - And Dana, you’ll rock those fancy Costco pajamas. Totally. And I think they’re on Sunday (and only know that because of this post).January 30, 2014 – 8:34 amReplyCancel

  • Synnove @ Don't Chew On The Dinner Table! - I figured my post still might work as we are all still wearing “blue”… πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 10:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Synnove, yup! Your post totally works and is hilarious. And a bit close to home…January 30, 2014 – 8:35 amReplyCancel

  • Kate - Penis on the neck is SO 2009. Glad you’re up on the trends.January 29, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

  • Ilene - Do you and I have use the same designer? Wrinkles, bags, no makeup? Ha! (Not that I’m saying you have wrinkles and bags. You said it first!) And I love the way you wear Tucker. That’s the best mom fashion anywhere.January 29, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I do have wrinkles and bags so that’s cool. I’m old and stuff. And yeah, Tucker is the best fashion ever.January 30, 2014 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - HA!!!! I love your look and will hook up with you to describe what I am wearing this awards season. Thanks, again, for NOT drawing that penis on your neckJanuary 29, 2014 – 11:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh man! I totally should have drawn a penis on my neck. Maybe next time.January 30, 2014 – 8:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Also, for some reason, Disqus is not letting me comment. But I will be back because it was so sweet of you to make a mixed tape for Jen!January 30, 2014 – 11:34 amReplyCancel

  • Beth Teliho - I thought I had found my favorite line: “They’re just people with access to personal chefs, plastic surgery, designer clothing, and 24 x 7 childcare.” (BTW YES YES YES!)

    UNTIL I saw this one:” I mean, even this mom, as sloppy as she is, doesn’t wear penises in the daylight, right?”

    LOL you are my kinda funny, Kristi! And and and you’re stunning. STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL REAL.

    This reminds me of a quick “penis on my neck” story. When my oldest son was about 3yo, we were at the zoo on a very hot, Texas afternoon. My husband was carrying said 3yo on his shoulders. Towards the end of the day (you know, by the warthogs) we hear, “Oh shit, I leaked.”
    Yep. My 3yo said that. and he peed all over the back of Jim’s neck, his shirt, down his back….and I laughed my ass off. It continued to bake on him until we could get home. It was awfulawesome. But I will never forget what my son said! Wonder where he learnt them werds?January 29, 2014 – 12:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Beth, I’m LAUGHING MY ASS off that your son said “Oh shit, I leaked!” and that your husband had penis AND pee all over his neck and back and shirt and hahah! That’s so awesome. Seriously.January 30, 2014 – 11:36 amReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. - You are fucking gorgeous, lady. And also- way to pioneer the “Just Say No to Neck Penis” campaign. Can I tweet that? That should bring you some pageviews. Totally tweeting it. I don’t care what the celebrities are wearing either. I’m all about comfort these days. Love this, and your perfect face!January 29, 2014 – 2:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA thanks for tweeting the No to Neck Penis Campaign. You are the bombdiggity. For Real.January 30, 2014 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

  • that cynking feeling - I knew I should have taken a selfie the day I had splotches of antibiotic on my pants at work. Yes, most of the medicine ended up on me instead of in the toddler’s mouth. I had the sense not to put on my work shirt, but I thought my pants would be safe.
    Oh, well. I’m sure I’ll have an equally exciting stain to share in the coming week.January 29, 2014 – 2:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HA. I love that you went to work with antibiotic stains on your pants (my son won’t take medicine by mouth either which sucks because I never know if he got any down so then the doses get all screwed up). You should join in on this! It’s open until Sunday!January 30, 2014 – 11:54 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - In the end, I bet we dress very much the same. We just came at the prompt a different way. What is it with no pants? My daughter wants to be pants-less, but insist on underwear, at a minimum, at the dinner table. Good for you for setting those boundaries! πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 6:32 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You rock for insisting on underwear at the dinner table! Ha. Also, Tucker refuses to wear underwear unless it’s the super-baggy kind that ends up riding up over his waistband when he pulls up his pants. So he’s a commando kid.
      I love how you did the prompt!January 30, 2014 – 11:56 amReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - LOL we both said penis in our posts! Inevitable with boys, right?? I love that your husband said it came out! My husband would have taken 50 pictures from 50 different angles, and I would have said, “Do it again!!”
    You look awesome, you are hilarious, and love the “real” you so much more than the backless dress poser you. Which would Billy like? πŸ˜‰ πŸ˜‰
    TTTX10!January 29, 2014 – 7:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - hehhehehe penis penis penis! My husband is obviously much, much lazier than yours is. Hm. I think Billy might like poser me…but he’s old and ugly now anyway.January 30, 2014 – 11:57 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle - This is just hilarious. One of my non blogging guy friends sent me a funny post about bathrobes vs yoga pants that he thought I would enjoy. It was hysterical. I have gone out in public looking less than stellar for sure, but in a bathrobe, no. I did once go out apparently not looking too great and ran into a friendly acquaintance that asked me what happened to me. LOLJanuary 29, 2014 – 7:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey thanks, Michelle – I just got really proud of myself that I’ve never worn a bathrobe anywhere. I feel downright classy!
      That’s funny (not really but ok it is) that your friend asked what happened to you! Ha.January 30, 2014 – 12:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP. PENIS ON THE NECK LOLOLOLOLOL! I heart you, and your photo up top is beautiful. You can’t see the wrinkles because your beauty outshines them!January 29, 2014 – 8:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I definitely don’t want penis on my neck! I think?
    What I’m wearing is a rain poncho. And what I’m doing is comparing myself to the Disney princeses I met yesterday at the Magic Kingdom. They were just so young and fresh and kind to all of the sweating imbeciles they must see each day.
    I felt..ugly. And it sucked.January 29, 2014 – 10:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m SO JEALOUS that you’re rightTHISveryMINUTE in sunny Florida, taking Magical photos in the Magical Kingdom with your Magical family! And I’m sorry that you felt ugly but I promise you on my honor that you are stunningly gorgeous. For real. Screw those dumb young girls. They don’t even know what life’s about yet…January 30, 2014 – 12:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Clearly I have missed a great blog hop in this. I was thoroughly enjoying your post (it being the fourth or fifth I saw among my bloggy friends) and then…the penis neck thing. I spit out my tea. And I haven’t stopped laughing since. I’m so mature.January 29, 2014 – 11:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Haha Lisa. Glad your maturity level rivals mine. It’s not too late to join us – the hop is open until Sunday!January 30, 2014 – 12:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Lady Lilith - I like your attitude. We should be focusing on what counts rather then other nonsense.January 30, 2014 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

  • Real Life Parenting - I also stay away from the Penis on the Neck fashion. I just never liked it … kind of like lacy socks with pumps. Just wasn’t my thing.

    Love this!January 30, 2014 – 9:46 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie DeYoung - You never know…penis jewelry might be coming to a runway near you next season!January 30, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah Day - I once went to work with a yogurt handprint on my back. It was THE rage that season.January 30, 2014 – 9:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - I’m back here for sharing purposes and I reread your part about how celebrities have it all for them. That’s what pisses me off so much about Giselle criticizing moms for not losing the weight immediately, etc. She is an expert at her image, that’s her JOB and she gets a lot of help doing that. She would suck if she had to fill your professional shoes for a day and I bet she couldn’t differentiate a lesson plan to save her life. Do we criticize her for that? No.
    rant over. πŸ™‚January 31, 2014 – 10:07 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jean,
      You’re SO RIGHT and I’m going to start openly criticizing Giselle for not knowing how to do our jobs. And yeah, she gets so much help doing that. I’d look awesome, too, if it were my freaking JOB!!!February 1, 2014 – 9:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Oh my goodness! This is so funny! I honestly hate celebrity gossip and I could care or less what any of them are wearing or doing. I don’t watch any of the shows. Funny about Tucker wanting a shoulder ride. I told hubby about that because he was sitting right here and he was laughing as much as I was lol.February 2, 2014 – 9:24 pmReplyCancel

  • May - Love this whole concept. What a stupid waste of time and money that whole celeb fashion scene is. I will take the Colorado tee any day of the week!February 3, 2014 – 1:41 amReplyCancel

  • Julia/ Frantic Mama - I loved participating in this link-up. You are so hilarious.February 6, 2014 – 10:42 amReplyCancel

  • Courtney Conover - Hi, Kristi!!! Fabulous post, as always! (I’m commenting so late that I hope you even see this.) I’m sorry, I’m still playing catch-up with my reading after the newer blog robbed me of most of my reading time. Oh, and I’m wearing pink plaid PJ pants from Target (circa 2010…does that make them vintage?), my new(er) fleece robe with cute little sheep all over them, and — I’ve saved the best for last, here — a tank top with breast milk stains on them, courtesy of my baby girl, which truly makes this piece a one-of-a-kind original. πŸ˜‰February 7, 2014 – 9:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Susie (The Esthetic Goddess) - OMG! Kristi, this is hilarious! Love your speech! Penis on the neck is so last year!March 4, 2014 – 8:40 amReplyCancel

Admittedly, an unexpected snow day due to cancelled school can be fun. For that single unplanned day, it’s fairly easy to reschedule work meetings, postpone some phone calls, and pretend you’re a little kid who gets to skip school.Β You play in the snow for a bit, do some shoveling, and snuggle up and watch TV […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Considerer - FIRST!January 26, 2014 – 7:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Considerer - OUF! Hells bells, I’ve been trying for that FIRST all weekend, and I’ve been playing catch-up and not managed it, so THANK YOU for letting me finally get one in there before bed at the end of my weekend! YOU WIN! I WIN! WHOOT!

    Love, love, LOVE the slideshow of Tucker and all his glorious snowy adorableness. So sad that he didn’t realise about the hose and pneumonia and you not being the boss (he might realise that now…)

    Your margarita looks perfect πŸ˜€

    I hope the two days next week provide some also thankful moments in amongst the chaos and challenge of missing school (for both of you) and that the SNOW GOES AWAY! Good grief it seems never-ending!January 26, 2014 – 7:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Um okay not exactly making a girl feel good because I alerted you to it and all, being all super special proud that I was 5 hours early. But um okay, if that’s a win..
      Love the slideshow too. my first ever. Ugh here’s to the seemingly neverending snow crap….January 27, 2014 – 9:44 pmReplyCancel

      • Considerer - :p I’ll take it, cos I was checking the TToT before bed anyway and I would’ve been here anyway.

        Hope the snow goes for you

        (love the reply notification)January 28, 2014 – 1:26 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - Oh poor Tucker! That picture of you crying is the exact same place I’m often at on Monday mornings, buddy πŸ™‚ Kristi, what a saint you are for getting through those 3 days. No easy task indeed and thank goodness your husband came to the rescue just in time. LOL…Franzia and locked in your bathroom. Sorry, I still have the giggles over that one. Fantastic post and pat yourself on the back frequently for being such a wonderful mom! You are immensely admired for the parenting you and your husband do from this commenter πŸ™‚January 26, 2014 – 7:20 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ach I agree Mike, poor Tucker but seriously? UGH to him wanting the dang hose. Seriously. And thank you. Thank you that we found one another and thank you for this most excellent comment!January 27, 2014 – 9:47 pmReplyCancel

  • zoe - don’t hate …. double bloggers… my kid is 24 and while I too am not the boss and never was , he now can play with the effing hose and get effing pneumonia if he wants as he is now making his own decisions… ie Im sure somewhere there is a 24 year old in shorts in a polar vortex playing with a hose! Wait here a minute will ya while I go call my kid and tell him to stay away from hoses and put on some warm clothes…be right back!January 26, 2014 – 7:40 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - ZOE. you total show-off. First a Seuss thing and then Hemingway? Yay whatever to the whole no hate stuff. Although I could never hate you…still.
      UGH to the shorts?? OMG. wait. never mind. I’m wearing shorts.January 27, 2014 – 9:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - I’m bracing myself for the possibility of three snow days – or at least cancellations – this week. The temps are supposed to dip dangerously low again. Last week the hubs had to deal with the delays while I was on a biz trip to sunny, warm California. Wintertime is hell on working parents!January 26, 2014 – 8:07 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Winter this year sucks. It just does, Nicole. Huge and big and UGH. We just got a hypothermia warning…school better be okay….January 27, 2014 – 9:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - I also had three days home with both my girls and my husband this past week. Monday was Martin Luther King Day, Tuesday it was snowing and coming down pretty badly by the time the girls should have been in pre-school (even Kevin was let out at 2 pm from work) and Wednesday was a snow day. So, by Thursday, I pretty forced myself to drag my two kids to school to try to get some work done. Trust me not my most productive week either and seriously those margaritas sound amazing right about now to me!January 26, 2014 – 8:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ugh Janine, I know! It’s just too much! The margaritas were awesome. Wish I had one now and here’s to us both having our kids in school this week. I’m frightened about the hypothermia alert already….January 27, 2014 – 9:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Ah, those crying kid photos! I’d just as soon give him a puppy if he looked at me like that!
    I’m sending you warm sunshine. I actually have some to give. And boxes of Franzia. Franzia is always here for you, and so am I.January 26, 2014 – 8:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG I’d so give him a puppy…or anything really. And hahah to the Franzia!January 27, 2014 – 10:25 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - My sister shared this on facebook the other day, and after your conference call experience, I thought you might appreciate it, too:

    http://youtu.be/DYu_bGbZiiQJanuary 26, 2014 – 8:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG Other Kristi, that is perfect and I’m so sharing it with my coworkers! Thank you!January 27, 2014 – 10:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - “I’m thankful that the water in the sink was only up to just before the overflowing level by the time I found the key and got the door unlocked.” Now that is a statement of thanks by a woman who knows what is really important in life. Go you!

    No twosies from me…had a hard enough time getting one out!

    Don’t those tears just get you every time? I admit I am a terrible sucker – have to really steel myself to not be affected by the big huge tears. I try.

    Have a wonderful week!January 26, 2014 – 9:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ugh, Lisa. Seriously, the water flowing behind the locked door was big stress. Big. And yeah, the tears get me every time. I’d like to have given him the hose….January 27, 2014 – 10:27 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - “Because you know. He’d look sadder with pneumonia.”

    (my favorite line from the totally ‘good’ Post.)

    so, I will say that I got something special from your Post this week because I can now say that I actually know someone (in real life) who has actually used those weird-assed bent wire ‘keys’.

    here’s to warming weather!January 26, 2014 – 9:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH yeah, the pneumonia thing was a factor, thank goodness because I was tempted. UGH to the stupid keys! And yes. warmer weather please. Please?January 27, 2014 – 10:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Dyanne @ I Want Backsies - How do you ever tell that sad little face “No”?

    Is it terrible that I laughed at your description of your second conference call? Because if it is, then I didn’t laugh one bit.January 26, 2014 – 10:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Nah, the conference call thing did suck. Big suck. Glad you laughed. And you’re right. Saying no to that face just plain sucks.January 27, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - I feel ya,sister. My birthday present for tomorrow is that Maggie goes back to school after only ONE day last week. I’m ready. Leo and I are going to bake chocolate cake and the sit down and eat it.January 26, 2014 – 10:11 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAHAH I love that you reminded me of your birthday again HERE and YAY for your birthday!!! And to chocolate cake. happy birthday dude. You. xoJanuary 27, 2014 – 10:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I know you saw me whining on FB. Really just coming off of Christmas break makes the extra days off “not welcome”. We only had a 2-hr delay one day but Thursday and Friday were teacher’s workdays. When you work from home a snow day just means more stuff to juggle. So I’m feelin you and so glad you found something to be thankful about. I’ll consider my thankful options this week as I anticipate snow days here in the Carolinas.January 26, 2014 – 10:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Kenya. It just gets painful, yeah? NOT WELCOME is it exactly. Ugh. Seriously ugh. And your new kitchen??? Yikes. Here’s to no snow days. Except tomorrow as I know you already have one…January 27, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Okay- I am laughing HYSTERICALLY right now!!! This post just cracks me UP!!!! Why? Because it is SO. WHAT. WOULD. HAPPEN. TO. ME!!! And that face? Tucker? Crying? OHMYGOSH that FACE!! I want to fly my ass over there right NOW and hold him and never let go!!!

    Oh good Lord, I hope you had SEVERAL of those adorable little marg guys!! You SO earned it!

    Bless your heart!! The hose!? Oh man… still laughing picturing the entire scene play out….

    Sigh. Chuckle. Sigh again…January 27, 2014 – 12:01 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, yeah…please fly over here (where are you anyway? because my brain is shot) and hold him. I’m good with the holding him part but him saying PWEASE PWEASE over doing the *&^%%%% hose? Not so much. Sigh. And chuckle.January 27, 2014 – 10:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Why is it so much funnier when someone else is having one of those “suck” days??? And your description of it had me almost peeing my pants. Yes. I remember those days with Lindsey. And I love her a gazillion times over also, but there were moments when I wanted something different.

    You do win on getting your list done sooner because I just finished mine. Have a great week Kristi. And hopefully they won’t cancel school anymore. I don’t know if I could take another crying Tucker picture. He’s even adorable with tears running down his cheeks. How does he manage that?January 27, 2014 – 1:00 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Linda, I guess because the suck days make us feel less alone? (like googling special needs mama sucks because that too sometimes)
      OMG I could have just plucked off my ears this week. Seriously. I feel guilty and all of that but OMG sometimes it DOES SUCK. This week SUCKED. Him wanting the hose? Ouch. And I guess all of the babies are adorable with tears. He asked me to see the crying pics tonight, which I think might be big? too?January 27, 2014 – 10:42 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I feel your pain, Kristi. Gwen was emptying her laundry basket last night and commented on how there was so much less than usual. Then we realized that it was because she spent most of the week home and in her pajamas. So I guess I’m thankful that I have less laundry to do today. Woohoo.January 27, 2014 – 6:52 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana, that’s funny that Gwen wondered about her laundry basket. I wondered about mine too until I realized I’d had the same stinky clothes.January 27, 2014 – 10:43 pmReplyCancel

  • Ginny Marie - Oh, I would have been tempted to let him play with the hose anyway, too! We have had only one full week on school in January; now we have today and tomorrow off because of the extreme cold, so we can’t even go outside to play in the snow! At least I’m a preschool teacher, so when my kids are off, I’m off, too.January 27, 2014 – 7:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well at least you’re off, Ginny Marie but seriously? Are you ready for school or what? I almost kissed our shortbus driver when he came today.January 27, 2014 – 10:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Last week was nuts!!!! My kids ended up only going to school on Tuesday (when they got dismissed 2 hours early) and Thursday. Plus, my hubby was out of town Monday-Thursday. I wasn’t trying to work, thank goodness, but it was maddening!January 27, 2014 – 8:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG Lisa, I’m sorry to hear that your husband was out of town. I don’t know how single mamas do it really. UGH to the snow days. One is fun. But after that??? NOT.January 27, 2014 – 10:49 pmReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - Awwww!! His poor little face…I would have totally given him the hose! πŸ˜‰ I definitely feel like snow days are only fun when there is just one of them!-AshleyJanuary 27, 2014 – 9:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - yeah. one snow day is like a prize. three? four with the holiday? a fucking nightmare. UGH.January 27, 2014 – 10:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - That margarita drawing says it all…I’m glad you were able to get out and have one (or two) of those…hmmm, you’ve given me the motivation to be thankful too and go get myself a margarita at some point this week…January 27, 2014 – 9:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Me too, Emily. Me, too. Sigh. Have one. Have TWO!! (maybe you should even have three????)January 27, 2014 – 10:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Laura - We have another “snow” day today as well. Thankfully we missed out on the extra foot of snow we were supposed to have, but it’s been below zero all day and dropping, so we’ll probably have another one tomorrow. Oh goodie!January 27, 2014 – 1:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Holy crap you are my hero. Seriously you had conference calls on top of snow days (which by the way I hear they cancelled before the snow actually dropped out of the sky. what the heck is up with that!!!) I think snow days are just wrong. Wrong i tell you.January 27, 2014 – 3:17 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - KERRI!!! UGH UGH UGH the stupid snow days. Don’t get me started. YES they called it before there was a flake in the air. They need to look at 1979 me and get the whole moon boot walk with plastic baggies over my socks thing!!!January 27, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

      • Kerri - I was telling Abby how I used to have to WALK to school and by the time I got there my hair was frozenJanuary 28, 2014 – 9:15 amReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - I hope it gets warmer so he can go back to school! Schools here are cancelled today and tomorrow because of the cold. I imagine it would be hard being stuck indoors with a little kid for that many days in a row!!!January 27, 2014 – 7:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Angel, thanks, sweets, me too. Me, too. It is SO hard for Tucker to have no school and it being freezing out so that playing outside only lasts like 30 minutes. What to do the rest of the day? Puzzles, Play Dough, all of it, it’s so SHORT.January 27, 2014 – 10:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - One of the many things that I love about you is that you are able to find thankful amidst the not-so-thankful. As well as humor. And the wherewithal to take a photo of your kid while he’s crying, b/c it makes a great blog moment. And so that you can bribe him when he’s older. I could go on about the things I love about you, but I think I’ll stop now.January 27, 2014 – 10:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Um Rachel. Love love you but it was damn hard to find the thankful this week. Also believe it or not he wanted me to take the crying photo. I’d taken so many, I think he wanted to see what his emotions looked like from the outside, which is huge. HHAH to bribing him when he’s older. I’ll have to remember that!!January 27, 2014 – 10:57 pmReplyCancel

  • Robert - Ah being the boss….of course I’m only third in our little chain of command and used to be fourth before our dog passed away. A very sad day.

    Anyway…your patience is much appreciated and tested after being locked up with Tucker our not so little treasure and would-be tyrant. I love you! You rule!!!!!January 27, 2014 – 10:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - jeez thanks, R. My patience is appreciated? Howz about you buy me that massage then?
      and I love you too.January 27, 2014 – 10:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Lady Lilith - Your children are adorable. They look like they are having fun in the snow.January 27, 2014 – 11:23 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Lady Lilith. It’s actually just the one child but I put in a ton of photos!January 28, 2014 – 9:34 amReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - It sounds like you had a rough week. Well done you that you managed to find thankfulness anyway. I can remember the days when phone calls were impossible. Young kids really want us to be with them when we are with them don’t they? I’m not sure at what age that stopped, but definitely I can phone or Skype or chat to friends and only my husband interrupts these days! πŸ™‚
    Here’s to no snow days for you this week!January 28, 2014 – 8:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks, Yvonne! We do have two teacher work days but since they’re planned and all that, I was able to arrange a sitter for part of the time. It’s funny – Tucker is happy amusing himself UNTIL I try to get on the phone. Then well, not so much.January 28, 2014 – 9:36 amReplyCancel

  • that cynking feeling - Poor kiddo. And poor mommy.January 28, 2014 – 11:32 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, it wasn’t that fun. I hear there’s more snow coming this week. Not clapping my hands over that.February 1, 2014 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

  • Michelle - I’m with you…three days of snow days is too many. Sadly, my kids still interrupt me on business calls. You would think that by the time they were teenagers they would have learned. I am going to have to buckle down, clean my office and lock the door. And by the way, that margarita looks quite tempting!January 29, 2014 – 7:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - How did I miss this post. Definitely changed my bloglovin settings so I can see each blog’s posts that I follow. Sounds like it was a tough few days. Toddlers can be something else as well. I can definitely see what you mean with how they act sometimes. Glad you got through it πŸ™‚February 2, 2014 – 9:18 pmReplyCancel

We are fairly traditional when it comes to having a Christmas tree, huge childhood birthday celebrations, and Tucker’s bedtime routine. Which – the bedtime routine each night – is exactly the same. Every. Single. Night. First, milk downstairs. Then choosing a toy, but not before he hides under a blanket and I say β€œOh no! […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Janine Huldie - I seriously hate the cold and the snow, but when I see it through our kids’ eyes, it does make it a bit more tolerable and less annoying to me, because yes I love the warmth and the summer any day of the week over this, but still when I had a snowball thrown at me by Emma and she was laughing about yesterday couldn’t help, but smile and laugh with her. Love how you tackled this this week and truly made full of wonder tonight for sure now πŸ™‚January 23, 2014 – 10:04 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - The snowballs from our children do gain magic, somehow. Which is amazing and wonderful and right. I love that you laughed at it unexpectedly today. Me, too. I did NOT want to go out. I’m glad that I did.January 23, 2014 – 11:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Being your AMA bloggy soul-sister, I related to this post. I did NOT have an amnio, because I figured it was my last chance to be pregnant and I didn’t want to risk it. The anatomical ultrasound was the one where I couldn’t breathe until we got the good word. I loved how you talked about traditions being a letdown. It is really true. I also just loved that you embraced all of it in this post. We are all of these things and more. Right?January 23, 2014 – 10:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ah. I had an amnio and still feel guilty. STILL. yeah to traditions. The suck and they are awesome.January 23, 2014 – 11:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Pam - What a beautiful, thoughtful post. Yes, life is scary… sometimes I think that is what it means to be an adult.January 23, 2014 – 10:26 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - I’m so grateful that we’re alive during a time where tradition and non-tradition are thought about more carefully than ever before. What is good tradition? What is bad tradition?

    And,

    Both of my children after their bath say “Wrap me like a baby and throw me on the bed!” I thought being thrown at bedtime was a tradition only in our family πŸ™‚January 23, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAAHAH well I love that they say “wrap me like a baby” because that is more than awesome. Maybe this lasts until they are too big to throw on the bed? And maybe, we are more awesome for continuing to do so?January 23, 2014 – 11:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - Ah, bedtime tradition. We’ve been doing a variation of the same routine for 15 years. Sometimes it drives me crazy because, well, she’s 15. But then I remind myself that she’s 15 and still wants me to lay with her every night. So we carry on the tradition.January 23, 2014 – 11:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awww!!! She still lets you do bedtime? That’s awesome. I complain, but I will miss this. I will miss this a lot. I love that she still wants you each night. Take it. For as long as she lets you!January 24, 2014 – 12:43 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I actually have quite a few friends who had babies at 40! I certainly think you all could have done without the gawking med students.
    We have bedtime traditions too. Scarlet and Cassidy even have one in which she has convinced him that he needs to fall asleep with her while watching Doc McStuffins.January 23, 2014 – 11:55 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA to Doc McStuffins and Scarlet convincing Cassidy that she needs to fall asleep to it. Love that. Doc McStuffins is what got Tucker to realize that doctors don’t suck, so I pretty much love her. And yeah, having babies at 40? We so could have done without the med students.January 24, 2014 – 1:37 amReplyCancel

  • The Dose of Reality - Beautiful and meaningful post as usual! I am always so excited when I see I have a new Finding Ninee post in my feed! And that snowball throwing picture….it is the best thing EVER!!! Well done!! –LisaJanuary 24, 2014 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awww, I love when I feel myself entering your inbox, too. It’s a good good feeling. πŸ˜‰January 24, 2014 – 11:53 pmReplyCancel

  • karen - what a beautiful post…the traditions we create within our own family…just to stop and look at them…wow!January 24, 2014 – 8:25 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Agree! Big agree. Traditions become more important to us once we’re parents and have our own families.January 24, 2014 – 11:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - Right before (or maybe after?) I had my first child, I remember my mother-in-law telling me that she thought traditions were an important part of raising a family. At first I thought she was referring to Christmas and was trying to convert me, the Jew. But then I realized she meant routines and celebrations that repeat every year or month or day. I’ve tried to instill traditions into our family — whether it’s traveling to Cape Cod every summer, or hanging the same birthday banner in the kitchen each time someone in the family has a birthday. I do think kids thrive on traditions, whether non-traditional or not. (I’m not sure that last sentence made sense, but you know what I mean).January 24, 2014 – 9:07 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Emily, isn’t it weird and icky and also amazing to look back at our MIL’s advice? Mine’s was quite horrible but given with love, so there’s that…I think that the travels and the birthday banners are what matters. Tucker is only 4 and we go to the Outer Banks every summer. It’s tradition and it means something. I agree and yes, your last sentence totally made sense.January 24, 2014 – 11:57 pmReplyCancel

  • donofalltrades - I love the bedtime routine, momma!

    I always tell myself that I want to be more involved with putting the kids to bed, but that’s all upstairs and it seems like a lot of work to get there so I mostly stay downstairs and half-assed clean the kitchen while momma puts the little ones to bed. They do run down and give me smooches though, so that’s something I look forward to.

    Being a parent sucks at times for everybody, special needs kids or not. If it doesn’t, then you’re not doing it right.January 24, 2014 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well I guess all of us have our bedtime routines, and if you are a douche or whatever, for yours, you’re actually not as the best part of goodnights I love yous are kisses and the routine? That’s the stuff that matters. I’d venture to guess that you’re doing it perfectly right and thank you for being consistentlyΒ awesome.January 25, 2014 – 12:10 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly McKenzie - Out of the park with this post yet again.
    Bedtime traditions are key. Having said that I must apologise yet again to the poor vet who suggested I take the time and find the joy in brushing my dog’s teeth every single night. I’m sorry I barked with laughter and spat out “NOT HAPPENING!” in such an unladylike way.
    Add another tradition to the bedtime routine? Was she crazy?January 24, 2014 – 11:16 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kelly, you are awesome. And OMG the vet? What an asstard!!! Seriously!! HAAHHA I cannot believe that anybody would think that you’d get joy from brushing your dog’s stinky teeth!!! My vet told me to brush our dog’s teeth too, and so we started and it sucked. I still had to pay $500 plus for the next cleaning because my dog hated it and who am I to limit our time together???
      So yes, she was crazy.January 25, 2014 – 12:14 amReplyCancel

  • K - Aww…I loved reading about your sweet bedtime traditions with Tucker! And the snowball picture is awesome…I’d imagine it takes quite a bit of talent to snap a photo as a snowball hurtles towards your face! πŸ˜‰January 24, 2014 – 12:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - K,
      If I’d have known, I’d likely have dropped the camera! And thank you.January 25, 2014 – 12:15 amReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Bedtime traditions. They have changed but have never left this house. Everyone still wants Mom to tuck in at night. Sometimes there’s talks, sometimes not. They read their own books or listen to their music now but there are always hugs and I love yous. Always. I think what we all have our own view of traditional and non. And that’s what makes your very own traditional special.January 24, 2014 – 1:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sandy, really??? OMG I so hope that I can still do bedtime routine with Tucker, then. I love that yours still let you. Much.January 25, 2014 – 12:16 amReplyCancel

  • That Girl Ryan - Please come to my house and put my kid to sleep…I’m jealous of your traditional bed-time routine.

    Love the pictures, love the post and love that you were blessed with your son even at an old age (whoops I meant non-traditional age)

    LOL Good stuff as always. πŸ™‚January 24, 2014 – 1:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Address please. As in never mind. We are forced to do the routine as my kid in on the ASD spectrum, and he’s freaking nazzi about it.
      Whooot to the “non-traditional” age, young asshole, I mean sweet you thing.January 25, 2014 – 12:18 amReplyCancel

  • Laura - Don’t worry, there are days that being a non-special needs mom sucks too. I promise! Kids are kids and I think you’re a fantastic mom!January 24, 2014 – 1:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Agree. There are days when being a human sucks. A mom. A special needs mom. thank you for the reminder!January 25, 2014 – 12:19 amReplyCancel

  • Echo - Traditions are absolutely bred from routine.

    Traditions/Routines can be great! I love the fact the my husband and I have our own versions of routines and traditions to suit our family.January 24, 2014 – 1:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. - Before I say something nice about the awesome overall message of this post, let me just say this, “incompetent oldass cervix” may be the funniest thing I have ever heard. For real.

    But really, there is so much wisdom, honesty, and perspective here about your traditional and non-traditional life as a mom. And if you tell me that you wrote it in like ten minutes before FTSF was live, I’m going to kick you. You probably did- some of your most inspired work is totally off-the-cuff. You kick ass like that.January 24, 2014 – 3:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HA well call it like we see it, I guess, huh? Because she IS. Oldass. Incompetent. And shit. So I won’t tell you I wrote it in 10 minutes because I didn’t and I was still editing while Kate was commenting…sigh. I must be better about this crap.January 25, 2014 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa Forever Five Blog - Just in case you are beating yourself up over having a kid at 40, Kristi, I am going to tell you something I know about that. I live in a place where in one neighborhood, kids are born to mothers under the age of 20 and then in my neck of the woods, kids are born to mothers who are 39, 40, 41, 42 and UP. I still can’t get over the fact that I was already graying when my first baby was born!;) Maybe the culture of your city has somehow led you to feel like you were selfish in having a child later on in age? Maybe not. But, just in case I think you are a BADASS for having Tucker. I definitely envy the labor and delivery of those 16-22 year old girls, but I have intense sympathy for the price their kids will pay for being born to children. Tucker was born to a fully developed Mama who is managing the challenges and unknowns that come with childrearing and special needs. You go with your 40-something self and all the love you have learned in your lifetime:). XOJanuary 24, 2014 – 8:46 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Lisa,
      OF COURSE I’m beating myself over the head at the 40yo baby but I’m also not stupid enough to not realize that doing so gave me THIS KID and that this kid kicks ass awesome. And yeah, seeing the young moms is horrible and icky and I’ve been mistaken for grandma at times (more than once). Thank you. Thank you for saying that Tucker was born where he was supposed to have been. That helps. More than a lot, and more than I can say…
      xo xo back at you.January 25, 2014 – 12:27 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Beautiful as always Kristi! I love the bedtime tradition and the way you showed how life takes non-traditional turns. Love those snow pictures, too! We and a crazy school schedule this week partly due to the weather and I am actually ready for a very traditional five day week next week!January 24, 2014 – 8:58 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, thank you!!! OMG the crazy schedule this week was mind-blowing and horrifying!!! And I’m jealous of your week next week. We have teacher work days on thurs and fri. OMG. We really do. Just typing that makes me worry….January 25, 2014 – 12:28 amReplyCancel

  • April - This is beautiful. Having that tradition will become a great memory for him and you. And loving him is the best tradition you can have!January 24, 2014 – 9:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Elena - Hi Kristi!

    I don’t know if remember me from this summer…you were and still are my inspiration.. We have gone through so much and still no answers. Although Eli has made some progress we are still anxiously waiting… He was evaluated this summer but doctor’s didn’t see autisim however I sense that something is not right. Eli can now put a few words together but is still behind when compares to other children in his age group. I ask myself the same question every night… Will my son be o.k in the futurwJanuary 24, 2014 – 9:39 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Elena,
      OF COURSE I remember you and have been curious as to Eli’s progress and diagnosis and all of the rest of it. We’re not really any further ahead than you are when it comes to knowing whether there’s a diagnosis of autism (Tucker’s Dev Ped said that he’s got spectrum stuff for sure but he’s also highly socially motivated). Please call me if you’d like to talk more. I’d love to hear more about Eli’s progress. I think mostly, that we are all still waiting to know, to know how they will do, and how they will be… which sucks but also has magical moments, and love. I sometimes hate the future. For the not knowing part.January 25, 2014 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - Sweet! Tucker is the luckiest young boy on earth.January 25, 2014 – 1:53 amReplyCancel

  • Marcia@ Menopausal Mother - Love this! I was 35 when I was pregnant with my youngest–and they told me I was “old”. Had to have the amnio after my AFP numbers came out weird–which scared the hell out of me because I had a fiend who lost a baby after the procedure. I love your attitude, Kristi. You have been through so much and yet you always find the positive side. That’s just one of the MANY things I love about you!January 25, 2014 – 6:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Marcia,
      I love all the stuff about you, too. And UGH to 35 being old! Only stupid young people think that right? I mean, I thought 35 was old once, too. But whatever to that!!January 25, 2014 – 11:44 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - Kristi, I read this twice. It was that moving to me. Wow, what a blessing you are. 26 weeks bed rest? But, the most amazing blessing out of this is for Tucker. You and your husband are god-sends and thank you for what you bring to that little boy πŸ™‚January 25, 2014 – 8:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Mike! Thank you. I wouldn’t say that we’re god-sends to him but we’re most definitely very very lucky to have made the best boy ever. Frustrating and annoying at times, for sure. But pretty much perfect, too. Thanks for the visit!January 25, 2014 – 11:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - Beautiful, Kristi. And as always so well put, with such clarity. And so relatable. The duality of being a parent, I think, is relatable to special and non-special needs parents alike. Having such contradictory feelings often in a span of one minute often makes me feel like a non-traditional parent, like I’m doing this parenting thing wrong. It’s reading posts like this that reassures me. LOVE.January 25, 2014 – 10:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Katia, I agree that the span of feelings over parenting can be reeling, feel traditional, and like we’re doing it completely wrong and that we’re doing it better than ever all of the time. Often, in a five-minute time-frame.
      XO you’re doing it all right, by the way.January 25, 2014 – 11:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - I always love reading your posts…. they always always take us into your life and into your heart in and through every last word.

    Love everything about this, and about you.January 25, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, stop or you will make me cry.
      And I love you back and all that other good stuff. And thank you. πŸ˜‰January 25, 2014 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Oh the old vagina…you’re killing me and making me smile and full all at once.
    You’re lucky to have such a wonderful babe in your life. We all have challenges, yes others have it more, but there are blessings in it. Your boy is a huge one.
    I’ll send you more snow.
    Love CanadaJanuary 26, 2014 – 5:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH Kimberly it IS an old vagina. Sad. And yeah, I’m way lucky. Do NOT send more snow, ass. I mean I love you but you’re an ass if you send more snow.January 27, 2014 – 11:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Nina - You have a way with words Kristi! I loved reading this post. You show both the ups and the downs of raising a special needs child, the fears, the leaving the family parties, all of it. So well said.January 27, 2014 – 10:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awww thanks, Nina. That’s big from you and I appreciate it. Ugh to the family parties. Except for when it’s surprisingly not ugh.January 27, 2014 – 11:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - You are right on throughout this post. And BTW, traditions (or in our house schedule) was so important for my kids as well as my sanity. I loved them. And I agree with Nina above, you do have a way with words.January 27, 2014 – 6:58 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - I’m always in awe with how I can be reading a serious post from you and then I find myself laughing out loud. Too funny that Tucker was throwing a snowball at you right when you were taking that picture! LOL! I was also laughing when you were talking about you own 40 year old cervix lol. I’m so happy that you had him. I know it has made you so much more of who you are today. Tradition and non-tradition is weird like the way you explained it…complicated. πŸ™‚January 29, 2014 – 12:55 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re so right, Brittnei, with the cool spelled name, about how tradition is weird, and our NON-traditional things become our own traditions. And glad you liked the snowball picture and my old icky cervix line!February 1, 2014 – 10:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Junior - Thanks so much for the daily updates. If we reelid only on what the national news outlets reported we would think all beaches are covered with oil. This really shows us what the conditions are really like. My family cannot wait to get there.Charlotte CampbellAugust 28, 2014 – 2:01 pmReplyCancel

It’s 11:33 pm on Sunday night and I’ve just now had the opportunity to sit down and write a quick thankful post. And, the fact is, I’m thankful that I’m just now getting a chance to sit down and write it, because life got in the way. Whenever Real Life gets in the way, I’m […]

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by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Oh no – my comment got lost. I must have tried to submit too quickly after I submitted one on your Special Needs Google Mama one in another tab and it yelled at me for submitting comments too quickly.

    Your blog told me to slow down because I was submitting comments too quickly. That has to be a first. πŸ˜€

    Now, what did I say…

    I said I was glad that your real life got in the way because you’re so right – real life SHOULD get in the way. If it doesn’t, we should probably all do some serious checking.

    I said I liked what you said about everyone having different circumstances. I think – and this is just my humble little opinion – that the term “special needs” is both far too narrow and far too broad. It means too many different things and can be interpreted so many different ways. And none of them is wrong. But it runs such a wide gamut that I think sometimes those who live on one side of it may feel like those who live elsewhere on it don’t belong there. But it’s like you said – everyone is here together and yet we’re not together. Ugh – isn’t life like that all over, though?

    And at that point I said I was rambling. And then I said it was awesome that a connection was made between you and Special Needs Google Mama maybe. I said I was glad you sneaked your TToT in just in the nick of time and I’m glad I was up way too long past a reasonable bedtime to see it pop in so I could read and comment.

    You’re an awesome person and an awesome mom!

    Now I’ll shut up.January 20, 2014 – 1:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Lisa,
      Where do I even start? That you stayed up to comment? That you are amazing? That you submitted to quickly? (LOVE THAT)
      Real life so totally should get in the way and well, yeah. Special Needs is TOO BROAD, you’re right, and I’m thinking of doing a post on it soon, for Our Land. I’d love if you will be willing to give me a sentence or two…
      And yes, it is life, that we’re all here together and are confused and scared and special needs doesn’t even play into that…
      YOU YOU YOU are the awesome person, and I hope that by the time I finish typing this, that you are sleeping soundly and amazingly and have the best dreams and rest ever.January 20, 2014 – 1:16 amReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Yeah, I was definitely multi-tasking and the computer yelled at me. :/

        Our Land…sentence or two…sure? Not sure what you’d like but I’m happy to help!

        I’m so glad I was awake to comment – nobody’s TToT should go unnoticed!January 20, 2014 – 3:51 pmReplyCancel

  • Considerer - It’s a bit like ‘spectrum’ isn’t it, the term ‘special needs’? It covers from here to there to everything in between. And anyone using the general term cannot be accused of aiming to exclude or show favour to any particular sets of circumstances within that range. I’m glad you’re in dialogue with this lady, and again showing your open mind and open heart to learning about and supporting more people.

    I’m glad you let life get in the way. I’m glad your priority is your son. And I’m pleased that you’ve written this late at night, to join in, but also to show us that really, RightNow and RightThere is what matters. Not here, not online. But there, with you, smiling, laughing, showing off his strength and creativity and twinkly wonderfulness.

    (Also, I used to go down stairs like that. Sometimes still do, just to see if I can. I can.)January 20, 2014 – 1:08 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I suppose it IS a bit like spectrum, and thanks for pointing that out. And aw, he does have big time twinkly wonderness. He really really does. As do you. Thanks for getting that I need Real Life RightHere more than I need this other stuff, and for forgiving me for joining so late every week, although that’s never my intent.January 20, 2014 – 1:19 amReplyCancel

      • Considerer - Intent be hanged. You’re DOING the right thing.

        And thanks πŸ˜€ Here’s to being TwinklyWonderful (cos you are too) and SLEEP! Get going, thee, and goodnight xXxJanuary 20, 2014 – 1:27 amReplyCancel

  • zoe - Wow…lisa and lizzi covered it didn’t they? Right on down to “get to bed” so I am gonna totally cheeze out and say … “yeah…what they said…” that and “GO DENVER!”January 20, 2014 – 3:42 amReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - I always feel exactly the same way about real life getting in the way! And congratulations to the Broncos…I am happy for them, too! I really wanted them to be playing The Panthers so I could bet my uncles lots of money and trash talk over email, but alas it was not meant to be! ;)-AshleyJanuary 20, 2014 – 8:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry that your trash talk with your uncle is out the window but yeah, I’m pretty happy for the Broncos!January 20, 2014 – 11:57 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - I love that life got in the way here and seriously look how much fun Tucker was having. absolutely perfect and this is what it is all about, Kristi. And seriously, never ever let the stupid and insipid Google searchers get to you, because Tucker is amazing and just perfect the way he is. Hugs and know that in my heart I love you, Kristi! πŸ™‚January 20, 2014 – 8:24 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw Janine, you are so sweet and I love you back! Life getting in the way is exactly how it’s supposed to be. Also, I emailed the second google searcher and am hoping that she’ll share some of her story. She was really nice about it. πŸ˜€January 20, 2014 – 12:03 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - (hey!! I’m up early to comment…well, actually I’m…as a matter of fact (aamof) I’m at work in the Monday) but, …but! it’s early to me.

    …yeah, I’m vamping* mostly because I’m in one of those…’what-is-it-I’m-doing-here-online’ phases.

    this place, the blog and the internet and all that stuff *is* real life. Those who would make a distinction are those who do not really appreciate what the virtual world really is… (why, yes, of course *I* do!).
    I always enjoy coming to http://www.findingninee.com because I am able to see parts of myself that are not always readily available.
    (yeah…I know I was talking about the non-difference between the RL and the VL… where was I?**)

    I think I’ll save my long explanation for why there should not be made such a big distinction between RL and the virtual world until another vid chat.
    (and this is another reason why I like you, I suspect there are Readers scratching their heads at this Comment…but I suspect you are smiling as you read.***)

    Now if I could only find the reset on the RL workplace I could getting something done today.

    *no, not what you think it means…if under tha age of 1,000, better go and google that thing
    ** yeah, I am at work…what a scary concept that is, no wonder I’m comfortable in the virtual world
    *** the good ‘yeah I do that!’ smile, not the ‘oh you poor poor….’January 20, 2014 – 9:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - 9:18 is up early? You go, dude! You’re right. The online world really is a real place, too. I just end up feeling guilty when I am so late with my week’s thankful because I miss you guys. Of course, I have a four-year-old to remind me to be HERE, present, rather than *here* present, ya know?
      Totally smiling as I read. *I* do, too! I need to be off to RL workplace too. Sigh. Happy Monday dude. Thanks for the excellent smiles and words.January 20, 2014 – 12:15 pmReplyCancel

  • Cyndi - I don’t always get a chance to comment, but…
    the BRONCOS are going to the Superbowl! I grew up in Colorado – spent the first 22 years of my life there. πŸ™‚
    As for the Google Mama…sigh. My mom and dad adopted my brother who has the mentality of a five year old. And life doles out its ups and downs, no? My brother is 57 years old and if anything happens to my parents, he comes to me. But, he’s a good guy and we’re lucky to have him in our lives.
    Aww, you’re an amazing mama. You keep doing what you’re doing and have a wonderful week. πŸ™‚January 20, 2014 – 9:37 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Cyndi,
      I miss Colorado and YAYYY to the Broncos! I’m so excited. And I didn’t realize that you have a special needs brother. I’m sure he’s a wonderful edition to your very full and busy life. I hope that you have a really wonderful week too – full of light and creativity.January 20, 2014 – 12:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Ginny Marie - My youngest would not go on an automatic flushing toilet for a long time, until she was big enough for it to not automatically flush while she was sitting on it! I think she was traumatized by those things.

    I’m glad that the special needs mom reached out to you. I read your post this weekend but I’m not sure I commented…sometimes I lurk. πŸ˜‰January 20, 2014 – 10:12 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Auto flushing toilets are SCARY! Plus, he got icky water on his legs and was totally bummed about it. And I’m glad that one of the Google mamas reached out, as well. Thanks for reading. And lurking πŸ˜‰January 20, 2014 – 12:30 pmReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Auto-flush toilets ARE scary – Kidzilla hates them, too! (That might be the other thing I forgot that I said in my original comment.) She used to cover her ears and scream in public bathrooms. Now she covers her ears and holds her breath, then usually says “that was not too loud.” Progress.January 20, 2014 – 3:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Oh my goodness! I’m happy for the Broncos too! I’m a Cowboys fan, but I said if it wasn’t going to be them, I wanted it to be Pey Pey hehe. I feel like I knew you wrote a post like that about special needs but now I’m wondering if I’ve ever actually read it. I can totally understand you saying it out of frustration if it was anything negative because sometimes even my son AND husband can be on a little on my nerves (hehe), but I find that when they are, it’s always my own fault because of how I’m looking at things and how impatient I’m acting. From not even reading that woman’s comment, I’m glad she told you you are blessed, she is right. I have come across variations of “special needs,” situations too. This lady’s was malpractice, one situation I saw was from vaccines. I hate that you have to keep hearing that Tucker is behind. I’m not sure why, but I just feel like he is going to come around to a level that people won’t feel like that anymore one day. I think he is such an awesome kid. I love reading about what he says and how he makes all those strides in learning and growing πŸ™‚January 20, 2014 – 10:24 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Brittnei, with the cool-spelled name:
      COWBOYS? Oh no. Huh. At least your second choice in Pey Pey is admirable πŸ˜‰
      I actually just wrote the one I referred to hear on Thursday night. You may be thinking of another older one called “What it feels like to be a special needs mom?”
      And thanks for your awesome kind words – Tucker IS an amazing and wonderful kid. He’s the coolest kid I know (although I am a little biased). I hope you have a great day!January 20, 2014 – 12:32 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - Congrats to your Broncos! I would have been happy with either outcome, since I am a New England girl, but I love Colorado, too. I figure it was a good thing for them, with all they’ve been through this year — shootings, fires, floods, etc. I know it made Boston feel happy to win the World Series. Now I hope Denver wins the Superbowl!

    I’m glad you had such a good weekend with Tucker, and that you were able to talk to “Google Mama” about her situation. My heart goes out to her!January 20, 2014 – 10:25 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - My heart goes out to Google Mama too. It’s making me think that there are a lot of Google mamas. Tons. Maybe millions, even at times who feel that way raising typical kids. Parenting is hard anyway…throw in some medical issues, fighting with insurance, and yowza. And YAY to the Broncos! I’m glad that you’ll be rooting for them!!January 20, 2014 – 12:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Kristi - It seems we’ll be rooting against each other in the Super Bowl, but how exciting that each of our teams gets to play! πŸ™‚

    The dialogue with Google Mama provides lots to think about, doesn’t it? I think that we all want to find understanding, and so we seek out those who are in similar circumstances. Of course, our circumstances are all individual, no matter how alike we are, and so sometimes we feel lonely and misunderstood. I think that it is important for us to focus on the similarities and be willing to withhold judgement on the differences, and I feel like your blog does an excellent job doing that. Hopefully Google Mama will feel that connection and be able to find the support she seeks.January 20, 2014 – 10:38 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Uh oh, to the rooting against one another but still that makes it more fun. And you’re right – the Google Mama dialogue does give me a lot to think about. I also completely agree that we are all very similar more than we are different but yeah, feeling alone and stressed out and unsure…it’s hard at times. So much so. Happy Monday, Other Kristi!January 20, 2014 – 12:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I’m glad she reached out to you, and you to her. I imagine there is a wide range. Of course I don’t know, but I’ve known very high functioning special needs kids, and I’ve known very low functioning. It’s a difference, for sure. Looking forward to hearing more from her.January 20, 2014 – 11:38 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, the wide range makes for gigantically different experiences for sure and I feel badly that I didn’t take that into account when writing MY experience, ya know?January 20, 2014 – 12:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Well I had a lot to say in response to so many things you shared- but after you mentioned Google Mama’s plight- everything came to a screeching halt and I gasped.

    I so hope and pray she shares her story here…It sounds horrific, and I can only imagine what she has endured.

    You just never know- it goes to show ya, doesn’t it? And the term, “It’s all relative” is quite profound in it’s practice.January 20, 2014 – 11:45 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, to it all being relevant – yes, it does go to show. I’m thinking a lot about shared experiences though. For me, being a special needs mama only sometimes sucks and it doesn’t suck THAT bad, but well, it still sucks. So I feel like I’m still “allowed” to be sad about certain things even though others have it worse. But then I feel guilty about that. I need to write about it and hope that Google Mama will contribute.January 20, 2014 – 12:47 pmReplyCancel

      • Chris Carter - I worked with so many people from so many walks of life in inpatient and outpatient residential psychiatric settings as a therapist- and I always say “Pain is pain is pain….”

        Your pain is no less than someone else’s pain. PAIN is pain. Don’t ever feel guilty for feeling your pain.

        Sure there are various circumstances that are different and varied in ‘degrees’- but pain? It’s much like joy.

        You simply can’t measure it up against anyone else’s. It never works that way- it can’t.January 20, 2014 – 11:05 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Chris,
          I believe that pain is pain as well, although have too little empathy for not-pain that is only used as such, if that makes sense…but yeah, to the measuring part. You are wise and amazing my lovely friend. I hope to have your outlook at some point. xoJanuary 20, 2014 – 11:19 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah - Yay for life getting in they way, and you going along with it. That’s my issue: life tries to get in the way and I shoo it off. That’s why I’m trying to be more “present.”
    It is incredible that you ended up making a connections with the googler. Isn’t it wonderful that you posted about your anger and sadness and that they she came forth, and you both learned more from it? This whole event makes me happy.January 20, 2014 – 1:50 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah it’s easy to shoo life. I think I’d be more able to but Tucker freaks out when I bring out the laptop, and my “office” is down a level, which I don’t feel okay about being in when he’s home…so ugh. But yeah, too much TV for sure.
      This whole thing makes me happy too! I think she’s going to share her story. πŸ˜€January 20, 2014 – 10:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Yvonne - Real life getting in the way is just how it should be! My kids used to do the same thing on the stairs and I got scared, but they showed me it was safe!

    I missed your other post on Friday but will read it after read this. Good that you were able to connect with the woman who googled and got your blog. Your thoughts about special needs and how everyone’s experience is different are something it’s easy to overlook and yet so important. And we all have our worries and fears. I consider us very fortunate that our extremely premature baby grew up without any major issues, yet every now and then I will worry that we don’t know what the future has in store for her. But then the same is really true for anyone.January 20, 2014 – 1:57 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yvonne, the stair thing is scary! But Tucker’s now managed it over and over so I’m becoming more confident (and just for REAL knocked on some wood just in case).
      I think we all worry, and maybe that’s the point more than special needs. Google Mama has made me think, for sure. You’re right. None of us knows. Maybe THAT is the point? Thanks for a great comment.January 20, 2014 – 10:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - I’m so glad the being a special needs mama reached out to you. I didn’t know how to respond to that post because I could’ve been that mama. Not all the time. But some of the time. I love my daughter. She wasn’t what I expected and now that years have passed, I’m glad of that. If we got everything we wished for, if life went according to plan, we might not be the people we are today. But for me, there were times/moments that parenting my daughter did suck. I was overwhelmed with her outbursts, her frustration, her…. I wish it wouldn’t have been that way. And yet there were times I was overwhelmed with love for her and her struggles. I understand that not all kids are the same. Even parenting my typical son–once in awhile–sucked! His instances seemed fewer and further apart. Anyway, am so glad there may be a change of heart on this issue.

    I don’t follow sports–but I do treasure moments when life does get in the way. It means you are living it the way you are supposed to. I so wish I lived closer to you Kristi. I hope you come to Oregon someday. I’d love to meet you in person. (And Tucker too.)January 20, 2014 – 4:23 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda,
      I’m thinking of doing a compilation post about all of it. Something like what sucks and what doesn’t but I’m not sure it will work as well in reality as it does in my head. If I do it, you will be among the first to be invited. Also PLEASE do an Our Land? People here need to know more about Lindsey and you and Lindsey and Nick…
      Also please don’t get me wrong. There are times when it sucks really really badly here too. When I am preparing for an IEP on Wednesday (EEEP), and don’t know the best things to do, and don’t have insurance backing for my Best Great Plan, that sucks, big. It sucks big when Tucker stops trying to talk because nobody knows what he’s saying. It sucks when he head-slams us for sensory input. So much of it sucks. I suppose that I was writing as much to me as to Special Needs Google Mama, actually. I’m sorry if I made you feel isolated and uncomfortable in knowing what to say. I don’t know what to say most of the time.
      I’d so love to meet you in person. And Lindsey and Nick. And maybe on a trip! Because traveling to Costa Rica?? Also, my birth mother lives in Oregon now…so I may be going in the summer (maybe).January 20, 2014 – 10:33 pmReplyCancel

      • Linda Atwell - Out One Ear - You have the kindest heart Kristi and I knew you didn’t intend for me to feel the way I did. It’s just that parenting is hard work. I know you’ve had good and bad days too. So no worries. I figured it was my problem, not yours. I’d consider your offer of the Our Land. Yet I’m not sure I’m in the same league as the rest of your writers. In addition, my manuscript was recently evaluated and I’ve received the edits from a small Oregon press. I’m actually so sick of the manuscript–but I want to finish and get it to publication if at all possible. And the edits/insights were incredibly valuable so I’m plugging along.

        BTW, please know that you could never offend. I admire your honesty. I just felt that woman’s pain and wondered what had happened that day. I’m anxious to hear the “rest of the story” if is works out. And if you come to Oregon, I’ll be furious if you don’t contact me.January 20, 2014 – 11:33 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - I am glad life got in the way and that you let it! Sometimes, I forget to let it. I took my oldest daughter to a public restroom when she was 3 and failed to warn her about the auto flusher. She FREAKED!! To this day, she avoids public restrooms at all costs (I sear she goes all day at school without peeing once!). while the auto flusher is gray in theory, I am convinced the person who invented it did NOT have hong children!January 20, 2014 – 5:00 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh Lisa, I think Tucker holds it like crazy as well!! It’s horrible and so understandable. Those stupid auto-flushes freak me out when I’m not expecting them.January 20, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Dana - I’ve been stressed today because my kids are home and real life has prevented me from doing the blogging thing…but you are right – real life SHOULD get in the way. We’ve gone for a walk, made chicken soup and matzo balls, and spent holiday gift cards at Dick’s. Everyone’s real life is different, right? I love how you make the effort to connect with your readers who really need the connections, Kristi. I look forward to your sharing Google Mama’s story if she wants you too.January 20, 2014 – 5:10 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - UGH DUDE!!!! I just got email notification that school is cancelled here tomorrow. WTF!?!?!? I’m so mad. And sad. And wondering how this even happens. Yeah real life should get in the way but also? FFX county is WIMPY. Like those old trash bags (remember them?). I think Google Mama will share her story πŸ™‚
      Is your kids’ school cancelled already? Seriously this blows me away. It’s like not even freezing yet.January 20, 2014 – 11:11 pmReplyCancel

  • meeshie - pffft.. My Giants are not in the Superbowl and therefor the Superbowl isn’t worth watching! (I will totally still watch it for the commercials though. lol)January 20, 2014 – 5:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HA I guess it’s always worth watching for the commercials although my son disagrees so I won’t likely see all of it anyway!January 20, 2014 – 11:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Roshni - Isn’t the internet wonderful?! It gives us nasty trolls for sure, but it also lets us connect with each other in ways that would otherwise not be possible!January 20, 2014 – 5:52 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Roshni,
      It really is wonderful. And she ended up not being a troll at all but a very lovely woman who has been delt a shit hand, so I’m glad now that I found her!!ALSO WELCOME BACK!!! YAYYAYYAYAYY πŸ™‚January 20, 2014 – 11:30 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah | LeftBrainBuddha - I’m so curious to learn more about your connection with the mom who googled you! And making cool car washes is an awesome way to spend the day!January 20, 2014 – 6:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sarah, I’m curious how it will play out as well but she’s started to share her story with me and I’m looking forward to how to share it with you. And yeah, car washes are awesome. Big time.January 21, 2014 – 12:02 amReplyCancel

  • Magical Mystical Mimi - Um, you lost me at you’re a Denver Bronco’s fan.. πŸ˜‰ And yay for real life getting in the way and yay for Tucker! Mostly yay for you, for your honesty. At the end of the day I just think we’re all moms with some pretty special kids no matter what society, dr.s or real life labels us.
    Stopping by from Bloppy Bloggers.January 20, 2014 – 6:51 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You’re right. Being a mom is bigger than any special needs because we’re all just moms. And HELLO the Broncos totally deserved this~~~January 21, 2014 – 12:08 amReplyCancel

  • Dyanne @ I Want Backsies - Real Life SHOULD get in the way, especially when it includes a sweet boy spinning on a tire swing (that made me nauseous just looking at the picture) and showing off his super strength and patiently building a car wash.January 21, 2014 – 11:18 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know! That tire swing! I had to look away when he was doing it. Crazy. The car wash was pretty cool though…January 22, 2014 – 7:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Look and you and the loads of comments missy πŸ™‚
    I’m glad that real life is getting in the way. That’s what we all need to do. Let those little blips take over and make us happy.
    I just have to point out that the picture of him coming down the stairs reminded me of the exorcist coming down the stairs like that. That movie scares the shit out of me.
    Go Detroit Lions…wait…I don’t watch football. I think it’s mostly because I tried to learn it when I was dating Shawn. He is a lover of the lions and I think it’s hard to follow football when the team you’re watching is garbage.
    Sigh..January 22, 2014 – 2:35 pmReplyCancel

Over the years, I’ve seen a few big things. They include life-changing opportunities, mind-altering moments, and messes caused by my toddler son in the backseat of my car that rival those of even drunken college friends who used to drive around while hoarding discarded take-out containers and empty beer cans. They include the disasters that […]

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by Kristi Campbell

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  • Janine Huldie - I absolutely love your letter to this person. Seriously, who Googles that, but then again there are just a lot of crazy, stupid people out there. However, you handled this quite eloquently and perfectly I might add. Being a parent (period) can suck at times, but then again there are tons more moments that make it all worth it. So, totally agree with just as a parent here πŸ™‚January 16, 2014 – 10:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree, Janine, to the who googles that but she must have been really sad and lost and feeling alone, right? There are so many moments that make it beyond worth it!!January 19, 2014 – 12:00 amReplyCancel

  • Don - Love it, Kristi! Hopefully, it wasn’t the parent of a special needs kid, just some random douche.

    Tucker’s pictures always make me happy. He’s a handsome little dude. You know what? You can take “special needs” out and just google – Being the parent of a child sucks. It sure does sometimes!!!
    Lots of times! I fucking hate it!! God, I wish I was at a tavern right now instead of at home…wait, what was I saying??? Lol. Nevermind. Great letter, ma’am!January 16, 2014 – 10:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Don, I agree that he’s a handsome little dude but also occasionally admit that I might maybe possibly be just a wee bit tiny biased. And yeah, you’re right. I can take the “special needs” out of it and it’s all still true. HAHAHA have a beer. Or 14. You deserve them. We all do.January 19, 2014 – 12:02 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - “Being a special needs mom doesn’t suck. It’s life. It’s the ride. The hope. It’s the journey.”
    This sentence hit home to me with a whallop. Amazing.
    You are one gifted mom. Love this post.January 16, 2014 – 11:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I don’t know about gifted, Kelly but thank you so much for the super-sweet and awesome comment. It’s the journey for all of us, right?January 19, 2014 – 12:04 amReplyCancel

  • Out One Ear - Linda Atwell - Wow. Just wow. I needed this. Thanks.January 16, 2014 – 11:12 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Linda, thank YOU. So much. I know you get all of this and have an even better perspective than I do as Lindsey is grown. And married! And happy and awesome. Because of you, in mostlyness.January 19, 2014 – 12:05 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Weird thing to Google – but I really can’t judge. My Google list is..more than mildly embarrassing.
    Hope he/she finds solace here. If he/she is looking solace, this is a great place to be.January 16, 2014 – 11:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Tamara, hahah to your google list being embarrassing. I’ve not told the other search terms that get people here, and won’t, but this one really touched me.January 19, 2014 – 12:06 amReplyCancel

  • jhanis - I hope she gets to read this and I hope she will find comfort in your words because she sounds like she needs a big hug.January 17, 2014 – 12:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree that she needs a big hug. I hope she finds it. Either online or at home. But somewhere.January 19, 2014 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - That’s such a very, very painful thing to be searching. I’m SO glad it brought her here. Because you KNOW, and you care, and most importantly, you WROTE BACK. To someone in such a very hard place, that could be the most important, wonderful thing. And that’s HUGE Big.

    Hugely, hugely well done.January 17, 2014 – 1:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks so much for getting it and for telling me that it’s HUGE big. I agree that she needs to be cared for and that searching must have meant that she was in Big Pain. And that just sucks.January 19, 2014 – 12:09 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - I hope she finds you again Kristi, all the google mommas, because I’m certain she was n’t the first to have despair enough to type in those words. Hopefully she’ll find Our Land and see that she is not alone. I’m glad you got the picture of Tucker also, just a reminder off the things that you have both overcome.January 17, 2014 – 5:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw I’m so psyched that you loved the photo of Tucker overcoming, Kenya, and I agree that she’s not the first to feel such despair and also hope that she finds Our Land. I hope.January 19, 2014 – 12:10 amReplyCancel

  • The Dose of Reality - Beautiful letter that all parents should read. I could not have been nodding my head more at “They’re not what you expected? Well. Are you what you expected? I’m not.” Oh, so true. I hope that Googling mom finds this letter. I’m glad I did. –LisaJanuary 17, 2014 – 7:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m not what I expected. And thanks, Lisa Dose Girl. Thanks for getting it. So much.January 19, 2014 – 12:24 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - I wish that mama could read this letter – maybe she will. I’m sure she feels alone, but she doesn’t have to be. I think that’s why mom blogs are so popular – we all need I feel like we aren’t doing this scary, wonderful parenting thing alone.January 17, 2014 – 8:11 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dana, I wish she would read it, too. I agree that mom blogs are so popular because they allow us to know that we’re NOT doing this whole amazing and terrifying parenting thing along. We have all of us. I have you. That’s big.

      (also did you get this because I’m not sure it’s working)January 19, 2014 – 12:26 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Wow! I have tears and that takes a lot because I rarely cry. I feel so bad for the mom who was desperate/sad/frustrated/scared/whatever enough to type in that search, BUT I am so glad it brought her to your site. I hope when she landed here she stayed a while. If she did, I’m sure it helped. You have such a beautiful way of looking at Tucker, seeing all of his wonderfulness, and sharing that with us. I hope that Google Mama is able to see that in her child, too.January 17, 2014 – 8:23 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I’m sorry that I made you cry but take it as a huge huge compliment given that you rarely do (I, on the other hand, cry often). I feel so badly for her as well, and thank you for your super-awesome kind words and hope that everybody can see their special needs kids the way that I WANT to (and don’t always) see Tucker. I hope that all of the everybodys see their kids’ wonderfulness. Thanks for an amazing comment, I appreciate it.January 19, 2014 – 12:28 amReplyCancel

  • karen - I love that your posts always either make me cry hysterically or laugh out loud. I think all mothers have moments when we feel desperate and alone, but we are mothers, we have a beautiful gift and magic in our lives everyday. No child is perfect, no mother is perfect. WJanuary 17, 2014 – 8:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Karen! THank you. You’re so right. No child is perfect and us mamas aren’t either. It’s easy to feel alone. I am so thankful for blogging friends like you who remind me that I’m not.January 19, 2014 – 12:32 amReplyCancel

  • christine - Oh, I can imagine the kind of day the person was having when she typed that. Utter frustration and despair does happen to so many of us at some point. I hope the person took a look around your site. If so, she is feeling better now. You are a wonderful voice for all parents.January 17, 2014 – 9:21 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can imagine her, too, Christine and it breaks my heart into a billion pieces. And OMG thank you for the amazing compliment. Not sure it’s true but we parents have to stick together and remind one another that it’s just sometimes HARD, right? xoJanuary 19, 2014 – 12:35 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - This post is poetic with wonderful messages for both special needs moms as well as all moms. I remember when I was first coming to terms with having a son with special needs and I met up with a friend of a friend for coffee who was a few years ahead of me in parenting a child with similar challenges. As she talked, I suppose she could see the fear and sadness on my face and she blurted out, “well, at least he doesn’t have cancer. I have a friend with a leukemia kid – now that gives you perspective.” Little did I know that years later, that statement would haunt me. I guess my point in telling you that story is that I completely related to your line of “It’s life. it’s the ride. The hope. It’s the journey.”
    Couldn’t agree more — especially now…January 17, 2014 – 9:30 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG Emily. Isn’t it amazing how those moments haunt us? When Tucker was still in utero, I had an amnio and when the doctor called me to tell me that the spots on his brain that they were worried about were okay I actually said “So he’s not retarded?” I said that. And that haunts me too. Big, huge and bighuge. I can’t even believe I said that word, now.January 19, 2014 – 12:37 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - Oh I am so glad I never read my stats or how people come and find me. I love your letter though. Because it does suck sometimes being a special needs momma. but you know what? it sometimes sucks being a typical kids momma. Trust me on this one it was epic this morning.January 17, 2014 – 9:31 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I don’t really read my stats either but was not happy with this sentence and was trying to just avoid posting because I had nothing nothing. And I know. Sometimes, life is just sucky, special needs or not.January 19, 2014 – 12:38 amReplyCancel

  • Laura - What an absolutely amazing post! Friends of mine just had their new son about a week ago and learned that he was born with down syndrome. At the moment they’re lost, devastated, and uncertain of what they’re supposed to do. I’m going to email this to her and hope that it provides her with some comfort. Thank you for being the amazing person that you are!January 17, 2014 – 1:25 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Wow, Laura, I have some online friends who have children with Downs so let me know if she’d like to speak to them. It’s probably too early for her, but yeah, being lost and devastated is part of the process, I think. I was, for sure and it’s why I started this blog. I felt SO ALONE when I realized that Tucker was severely delayed with language and other things…so alone. But I’m not. I mean I am, but I’m not, ya know?January 19, 2014 – 12:43 amReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - I love you so, so much. The end.January 17, 2014 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - How sad and frustrated that person must have been. However, they couldn’t have landed at a better website. I hope your Land gives them some hope!January 17, 2014 – 2:38 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree that she must have been sad and frustrated and love that you think that she came for comfort here. I’m not sure what she saw so it’s entirely possible that she only saw the idiot me posts. I hope though that she found other mamas, like you.January 19, 2014 – 12:47 amReplyCancel

  • Ilene - I love this letter. And I hope that somehow that Special Needs Google Mama finds this. I hope all mamas find this, special needs mamas or not – because this main stream mama needed to read this as well. Our children are not yet who they will become . And neither am I. Brilliant.January 17, 2014 – 3:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Joy @ i can say mama - SO beautiful and true! <3January 17, 2014 – 4:01 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. - Holy crap! I wasn’t prepared for this! I think your letter was the perfect blend of validation and inspiration. And I wouldn’t be surprised if someone found my blog by googling, “Being a parent sucks.” Again, I could write a similar yet different letter. Yes, it does suck. It’s also the best thing ever. (Please refer to our ongoing private FB message convo.) πŸ˜‰ xoxoJanuary 17, 2014 – 4:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Steph, yup. It sucks and IS the best thing ever ever. And yeah, thanks for you. And the facebook convos.January 19, 2014 – 12:52 amReplyCancel

  • Joelle Wisler - This is lovely, lovely. And I shudder to think of the terms that bring people to my site! Most of them are hidden, probably for a good reason.January 17, 2014 – 6:53 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHAH to the terms that bring people to our sites. I don’t even often look any longer, but had NOTHING for FTSF and was bored, so…January 19, 2014 – 12:54 amReplyCancel

  • Erin - I.love.you. And your balance. Your boldness. Your heart. Keep preaching.
    .January 17, 2014 – 7:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah | LeftBrainBuddha - Oh wow, Kristi. I hope she googles it again and finds this.January 17, 2014 – 7:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - Sob! I don’t know if special needs mama will read this post. I hope she does. I’m just glad that I did. And glad that you are in the world.January 17, 2014 – 8:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa Forever Five Blog - You go, Kristi, with your badass, heartfelt self! I connected with everything you wrote here even though i don’t know what a day is like in your shoes. I really connect with that struggle to accept what is and cherish it. Your poetic words in the middle of the post were like taking off on a wild roller coaster of emotions and I felt like I was right there with you. You have the gift of drawing readers in , that’s for sure. My kids would not be labeled as special needs (high needs would be appropriate imho;), but I spent more time than I care to admit trying to come to terms with the number of children I had. In my darkest hours with those thoughts and struggles, I often thought of moms of special needs kids and how they likely went through the same mourning and agonizing over what can’t be changed. In the end, parents never get whatever it was they expected. Whether it’s the number of kids, the level of functioning, the gender, the personality, whatever. The more I take time to love and understand who they are and who I can be as their mom, the more awesome it is and the easier it is to feel insanely grateful that we got a twofer the second time around!;)January 17, 2014 – 8:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - OMG Lisa, thank you for this awesome and epic comment. I don’t know what a day is like in your shoes, either but I love your words and find you so relatable and real. The whole mourning and not being able to change things is big for us all, I guess, not just for special needs moms. All moms. Because none of us are raising who we thought we would be but all of us are raising the people we should be, ya know? I agree that the more acceptance we have equals more awesomeness and thankfulness for what we have.January 19, 2014 – 1:03 amReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - Well now this I get. I get it too much. From the email other mom’s send me, to the fact that my babysitter quit after reading my blog.
    Being a special needs mom is never easy, but it’s also amazing and wonderful and beautiful.
    And frankly, I think we have better relationships with our special needs kids because we are with them so much, and interact with them so closely. Which is a blessing, and a curse.
    I hope that mama reads this post, actually if she stuck around and read your blog, I’m sure she feels better already πŸ™‚January 17, 2014 – 9:47 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I do know that you get it, Jen. So much and WTF to your asshat babysitter!?!?!? You’re right – it’s not easy but it’s so amazingly beautiful and perfect and I can’t imagine anything else. In fact, if Tucker were typical, I’d probably work more because I’d think that was “normal” and I’d miss out on SO SO MUCH.
      xo and TTTx10January 19, 2014 – 1:05 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie - The Cat Lady Sings - <3January 17, 2014 – 10:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Echo - From one special needs mama to another, all I can do is applaud this post and your letter!

    *applauds*January 17, 2014 – 11:40 pmReplyCancel

  • Dawn - “They’re not what you expected?

    Well.

    Are you what you expected?

    I’m not.

    Our children are not yet who they will become.

    And neither are you.”

    This is what I needed to hear today. Thank you.
    And btw it wasn’t me that googled that, but it very well could have been yesterday.
    xoJanuary 18, 2014 – 12:13 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ha to it not being you that Googled that, Dawn, but yeah, at some point, it could have been me, too. None of us are what we expected, right? xo xo to you, sweets.January 19, 2014 – 1:08 amReplyCancel

  • Menopausal Mother - Wow….this blows me away. Every time I come over here, I get a lump in my throat. Kristi, this is the type of post that needs to go viral—you need to reach other moms with this, to help them—it’s so beautifully written. You never cease to amaze me. XOJanuary 18, 2014 – 12:40 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awwww thanks, Meno Mama!!! You’re pretty awesome your own bad self and I really appreciate the excellent sentiment. I just hope that google mama feels less alone if she finds me or you or any of us, ya know?January 19, 2014 – 1:10 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Could you picture her? Crying at her laptop with a child screaming banging his head in the backround and floods of tears drowning out her fear? Could you see her? Terrified of her next appointment with so and so, about this issue and that? Could you feel her? Suffering with angst at “what to do now???” Could you know all about her…

    Yes, you could. You do. This precious mama needed to know that.

    Beautifully said, my friend.January 18, 2014 – 12:41 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, I could totally picture her, sad, weeping maybe, desperate, and whether her son was sleeping or banging his head nearby, I get her. I do get her and I hug her virtually and tight because life and mama-ing sucks at times. And yeah I am also very very thankful for YOU. And this beautiful comment.January 19, 2014 – 1:12 amReplyCancel

  • Christina Morley - Here are my favorite lines from this post:

    “We are everything. We matter. We are everything. We are everything that matters, and we are all that matters.”

    “Please, try to stop looking at your child’s needs, and start looking at him.

    At the light. At the determination. At the resilience, and the love.”

    Hugs,
    TinaJanuary 18, 2014 – 2:30 amReplyCancel

  • More Info - I must say youοΏ½ve done a fantastic job with this. In addition, the blog loads super fast for me on Safari. Exceptional Blog!|January 18, 2014 – 5:13 amReplyCancel

  • Jean - well, I knew synchronicity was the word of the day for me at TToT for Jan. 18, but not quite THIS MUCH! jean yates xoxJanuary 18, 2014 – 2:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Quirky Chrissy - This was so poignantly written. I’m not a special needs mama or a mama at all. But I spent two summers working with some of the most extraordinary children that I’ve ever had the pleasure of encountering. I taught reading comprehension with writing and math applications to children 5-20 who had a variety of special needs from PDD to dyslexia. It was amazing to watch them grow. I feel honored to have spent that time with them. And I can only imagine the amount of love in the hearts of those parents. Because I loved those kids, spending a small amount of time with them each day.January 18, 2014 – 2:59 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Quirky Chrissy, I’m sure that they were very very lucky to have you as a teacher, because caring like that is 95% of the job and I love that you enjoyed watching them grow so much.January 19, 2014 – 1:27 amReplyCancel

  • Tarana - Beautifully said! If there’s one thing that all mothers have, it’s that they love unconditionally. And you know what the interesting thing is? When these moms have special/different circumstances, they love their kids even more.January 18, 2014 – 4:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Loving unconditionally is definitely a mom/parent thing. I thought that I LOVED before Tucker but it wasn’t the same, ya know? I mean it just wasn’t. I think that the special circumstances don’t always mean that we love our kids more but it does mean that we’re more aware of them, and the thems that will be here once we are gone because that part is just frightening and awful, if that makes sense. Thanks for the share and the awesome comment, Tarana.January 19, 2014 – 1:38 amReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - You are wonderful. This is wonderful. There is a reason God pairs the children and parents together that he does – I believe that firmly – and this just reinforced that for me all over again.

    I can only imagine what must have driven that mom to Google what she did. She was reaching out for something and I only hope she found what she needed. If she read your words, she is lucky indeed.January 18, 2014 – 8:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - LISA!!! Yikes. Thank you. I hope she found what she needed, too, and appreciate your sentiment that it might be here. Wherever it was, I really hope she found it and thank you!! XOXOOXJanuary 19, 2014 – 1:51 amReplyCancel

      • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - OH I hope that YIKES was good, not bad! Meanwhile, I just got done reading your TToT and see??? Connection happened because it maybe was supposed to! AAAHHHH!January 20, 2014 – 12:56 amReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Lisa, yes, it was a good Yikes! Awesome to the connection. And now I wish I had soup to eat.January 20, 2014 – 6:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - This is beautiful. As for who googles something like that? Someone who is scared. And I really hope they came back here again and read this.

    You know? Sometimes being a parent sucks. Full stop. Sometimes your kids aren’t “what you imagined they’d be” for any number of reasons. When you become a parent – or as you are imagining what it will be like – you can’t help but imagine the ideal. Nothing is ever ideal. And there are 100 little parenting failure moments every week where you KNOW it didn’t go as you pictured it, and you try to figure out how you could have done better … But once you leave that crazy spot of “fear you can’t do it or are mucking it up somehow” and realize your kid isn’t suppose to be an ideal – or a project – they are just suppose to be “them” – I think that’s when you can just work on making them a happy “them”.

    I don’t have a special needs child and still much of what you says resonates. My daughter had a helmet for plagiosephaly (flat head – so, obviously I thought that was my fault); she’s had eye surgery for a lazy eye; and she isn’t getting her numbers and letters as fast as some of her peers in JK so there are numerous notes home from the teacher suggesting ways we can “encourage” her. It’s so hard not to take it as a judgement on your child and your parenting. And all this is just mostly “normal” stuff (for lack of a better term). I can’t imagine the added pressures of raising a child with additional needs. If I feel my life sometimes “sucks” I can imagine how Googlemom sometimes feel the same.

    It feels a bit odd adding this here – but I nominated you for a Sunshine Award – you are really one of my favourite bloggers/people I’ve met via blogging. No worries if you don’t do awards – just my way of saying I love what you do (and if I ever strike oil or win the lottery I’m totally helping you open your school!): http://babygatesdown.wordpress.com/2014/01/18/awards-awards-awards/.January 18, 2014 – 9:27 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Louise,
      You’re so right that sometimes, being a parent sucks, full stop. None of us are raising the children we imagined we’d be, right? UGH to the parenting failure moments, of which there are too many and as a kid, I had no idea existed. I love how you say that once we realize they’re just supposed to be “them” that we can focus on making them happy.
      And of course you thought her flat head was your fault and of course UGH that when the school sends any suggestions home that it’s a judgement – OMG and these teachers?? Some are amazing and awesome. Some, aren’t parents, some are, but the ones that aren’t parents yet, I can’t help but wonder if they know how to talk to us. I believe they can be and are amazing teachers but I also know they don’t know how to speak to US. AND OMG thank you so very much for the sunshine award and for helping with Our Land School if you win the lotto. You rock, my friend. Big time.January 19, 2014 – 1:59 amReplyCancel

      • Louise - I think one of the things I struggle with is just knowing how hard to push my child to learn whatever it is she is struggling with. I’d figured out by the time she was two that anything “fine motor” wasn’t going to be her strength. On the flipside, she rocks imaginary play, is very thoughtful and can swim. She just wasn’t interested in writing out letters, stacking blocks or making collages and throwing another “busy bag” or craft project at her wasn’t going to change that any more than another note home from her teacher pointing it out. We read together, we have a magnetic letter board, we count stairs, we have playdoh and art supplies galore. I figure there will be a moment where it just “clicks” and kids learn at different rates at young ages. But every now and then I get a note home that makes me feel I should be drilling my 4-year-old with flash cards and making sure she is properly holding her crayon; colouring in the lines; and cutting out perfectly shaped hearts. But then I figure if I take all the joy out of the moment, she won’t want to do it all. And she’s 4 for Christ sakes! Today she drew a recognizable triangle. I’ll take that as a win. I know school is all about structure and benchmarks and comparing my kid to others. And it’s very hard for Type-A Overachiever me to try and let her be her – and encouraging that without being overbearing.

        Which brings me back to – wow – if ever there was a role specifically created to make you second guess EVERYTHING you do – it’s parenting. And so – sometimes it sucks.

        Again – wonderful post.January 19, 2014 – 8:56 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Louise,
          You are the bomb diggity and are SO RIGHT that parenting makes us second guess everything and I completely agree that it would be plain old crappy to drill your 4year old with flash cards and would make her enjoyment of learning not enjoyable. Wha-hoo to rocking drawing a triangle! That’s awesome. Thanks again my awesome friend.January 20, 2014 – 6:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Kathy at kissing the frog - “Are you what you expected?” No, no I’m not the mom I expected. Mostly because being a mom is a lot harder than I ever could have imagined. Ths is powerful and raw, and good for you for writing it.

    And no, I haven’t forgotten about Our Land. I’m just still catching up from the holidays. I will contact you soon. xoJanuary 18, 2014 – 11:05 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kathy, I’m SO glad that you’re still considering doing an Our Land. SO glad and thank you – I guess none of us are the moms we expected. It’s hard. Amazing, and wonderful and breathtakingly beautiful, but hard.January 19, 2014 – 2:20 amReplyCancel

  • The Insomniac's Dream - Kristi, this is beautiful. You’ve brought tears to my eyes and my emotions to their knees.

    All the fucking feels in the world right now.

    What you said in this letter – those words – they were Big BIG BIG.

    This could be applied to all Moms, all Dads, special needs, kids acting out, kids not being what you want, just kids.

    They’re all Just. Kids. They are all special.

    I hope she read this, that Mother.

    I hope all Moms read this.

    Dads, too.January 19, 2014 – 1:19 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Awe, Sleepy, thank you. I agree it’s not just special needs moms, or moms, really, who nee a reminder that they’re just kids, and special and perfect and not perfect. Thanks for the awesome comment, you.January 19, 2014 – 2:39 amReplyCancel

      • The Insomniac's Dream - Thanks for the awesome letter and reminding all of us what we’re here for.January 19, 2014 – 2:45 amReplyCancel

  • Manal The Go Go Girl - Kristi,

    I feel bad for this woman who seems so desperate. I hope that she’s reading this beautiful post and realizes that there’s so much hope and she’s not alone.
    You’re amazing! You make it look so easy to cope with. You are an inspiration!
    Hugs:)

    ps: I’m sending this post and your site to my friends. I was just talking about you at dinner tonight.January 19, 2014 – 1:37 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Manal, I feel so bad for her, too, and hope that she’s reading something anyway, to make her feel less alone. Anything really!
      And I promise I’m not actually amazing but my big fat almost ego makes me want to know what you were saying at dinner tonight of course. xo and thank you so much, friend. YOU are amazing.January 19, 2014 – 2:41 amReplyCancel

      • Manal The Go Go Girl - My friends have 2 autistic boys, ages 5 & 6..Daddy blogs and the wife has been asking him to blog about it. He has reservations because the 6 year old is high functioning and he doesn’t want to label him all over the internet but he said he wouldn’t mind sharing about the younger boy. I told her how amazing you are and how she could benefit from reading your experiences. I also told her she could do the blogging. Anyway, I did send her your link.
        My other friends are psychologists and they also have a severely autistic child so they turned their practice into The Houston Autism Center. I promised to do her first fundraiser Gala but my issues have kept me pretty busy. I pray that 2014 frees me and my cousins so I can go back to helping:)January 19, 2014 – 8:07 pmReplyCancel

        • Kristi Campbell - Aw, Manal, I pray, too, that 2014 frees you from the awfulness that your cousins and you have faced. I cannot even imagine how you have kept from punching some of these people. I have wondered if Tucker will be angry/upset with me later, but have told myself that if he is, I unpublish this blog, and if he wants to, he can read it privately. I imagine that I will share fewer photos of him as he ages. With that said, having this blog has been a savior for me. I can’t say how alone I felt in not knowing whether he has autism or something else, and finding people that it doesn’t matter to. Finding people like you, who have become such great friends, through sharing our words with one another.January 19, 2014 – 9:23 pmReplyCancel

  • Sandy Ramsey - Kristi, If someone was having THAT day and landed on your blog, they are the better for it. I hate to wish that they would search it again so they would find this letter but if they should, and they do then you will have done an amazing thing for that person. I think your words benefit us all as mothers AND as people, period. I was touched intensely by your words and imagine by the looks of the comment stream, so were many, many others. This, among so many other reasons, is why you are one of my all time favorite people, even though we’ve never met face to face. I should be so lucky. Tucker is blessed….and very handsome!January 19, 2014 – 2:30 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sandy,
      Thank you so much. And you’re one of my favorite people too, and I so very much hope that we’ll meet in person!!! Thank you for saying that Tucker is blessed (and handsome – I so agree!!!), but honestly, it is he who has blessed me. So much. The big bless. xoxoxJanuary 19, 2014 – 9:29 pmReplyCancel

  • The Google Mama - I googled it! Just this afternoon.
    As much as I enjoyed your letter back to me & the previous googler…I must stress to you & the other commenter that clearly you and I mother son’s that are at different ends of the special needs world. I am happy that your son can communicate and hug, and interact and use a fork or possibly want a book. I am not that fortunate! My son is a victim medical malpractice resulting in severe traumatic birth brain injury. He is now 13 yrs old but is at a 6-9 month level developementally. What happened to us during his delivery & every single day of the past 13 years SUCKS! Please be open minded to the plights of all moms of special needs children….some of us have it much worse than you. Do not judge me, for I am a fantastic mother and have gotten my son further than anyone expected. I am deligant & I persevere! But the fact remains that it does Suck!January 19, 2014 – 7:13 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Google Mama,
      You’re right. It does suck. It sucks much worse than mixing up “fork” with “book” and it sucks often. It sucks every time a kid asks my kid what his name is and walks away from him when he tries to tell them.
      And, although I am not in your shoes, yes, it must suck much much much more for you than it does for me. It was not my intent to imply that I am judging, and I apologize if I came across that way. In many ways, this blog is a way for me to find community with other special needs moms, because the community of some of the typical moms that I once had has become too painful for me. It makes me sad beyond belief that your son’s needs were caused by a medical malpractice and I can only imagine that hurt, betrayal, and anger that you must experience daily, hourly, over and over and over again, knowing that if somebody hadn’t messed up, your boy may be doing what he was supposed to be doing now.
      If you would like to share your son’s story, I’d be more than happy to do so here. I actually have a series that is designed to educate everybody on acceptance and respect for every single difference that there is. I’m going to email you as well but promise you that I do not judge you and apologize if my post came across like I do. For me, it is a reminder – to me, and to others – that life is still fabulous, even though I continue to grieve the 4 year old that I thought I might have now. I miss him, although we’ve never met.January 19, 2014 – 9:20 pmReplyCancel

  • Meg Kra - Hey there! I saw you blog post on G+. I don’t have any children so I don’t completely relate to your topic. But it was very well written and it did touch my heart. I hope your Google lady finds your blog again because it sounds like you may have written exactly what she needed to hear. Keep up the great work.January 19, 2014 – 8:29 pmReplyCancel

  • Camille - Beautiful post!!January 19, 2014 – 11:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Once someone found my blog via search “Stick road cone in ass”
    I would have written a letter to this person on my blog but my blog is a pervert free zone…
    All jokes aside…
    This broke my heart. “Whatever place you were in that day”…oh how many of us struggling…no living and thriving with life challenges say “This sucks”? Probably all of us.
    But this? This is what that parent needed to read and I am so glad that you did. You’re a good mom and a good advocate to so many.
    Love you.January 20, 2014 – 6:43 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kim, HAHAH to Stick road cone in ass. Oh shit. Since I just typed that here, and you typed it, does that mean Google will send them here now? Or do comments not count so much?
      And thanks so much for your awesome kind comment, love. You’re right that there are days that being a parent sucks. That being a human sucks. And there are others that don’t.January 20, 2014 – 5:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Nancy - I didn’t have time to read all the comments so I don’t know if anyone else is reading this from the perspective of a person with a disability. But I related to this so much from the other side. None of my children have disabilities but I am profoundly deaf and sometimes I feel the same as the mother who sparked this blog post. Sometimes, it really SUCKS to be a deaf parent but luckily, it is rare for me to have days when I feel that way. Instead, I marvel at how much my children have adapted to having a deaf mother and I try to see how being a deaf parent enriches the experience of motherhood and childhood for my family. Thanks for this post.January 20, 2014 – 9:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hi Nancy,
      Nobody else commented from the perspective of a parent with a disability and so I really appreciate your perspective. I’m glad that the SUCK days are much less frequent than the good and enriching days. Going to check out your blog now. Thank you again!January 20, 2014 – 6:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Kate Hall - I love this, Kristi. You have this amazing ability to move people with your words. I hope Google Mama stuck around long enough to see how awesome you are and is finding encouragement through your writing.

    And sorry I’m so late reading this. I suck.January 24, 2014 – 12:14 amReplyCancel

  • Mike - Geezus, this one made me cry, Kristi. You and your husband are not only blessed to have Tucker but obviously him, you. And the two of you are blessed as individuals. And yet two people who have united to a bigger love. Wow, wow, wow… No kidding who Googles that. Shaking my head. My fingers have stopped for a second here typing. Shaking my head again. All of my love and prayers to you guys always. Oh, how forgiving you were to that unfortunate Google searcher. Loved this πŸ™‚February 1, 2014 – 9:41 pmReplyCancel

Hi, all! Do you know Don fromΒ Don of All Trades? He’s hilarious, occasionally warm and fuzzy, and overall pretty awesome. He’s a daddy, a fried chicken protector, a cop, a kickass storyteller, and has become one of my favorite friends. Β He’s given me this amazing Our Land today, and I know that you will adore […]

View full post Β»

by Kristi Campbell

Whatcha think, peeps?
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  • That Girl Ryan - Of course, right when you want to make fun of Don he writes stories like this and then you can’t. Such an interesting perspective on the different lives of other people. Really enjoyed this.January 15, 2014 – 9:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I know, right? I was so planning on making fun of him too, but just couldn’t bring myself to do so because he can be pretty awesome at times. Like this.January 15, 2014 – 9:38 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Make fun to your heart’s content ladies. I’m happy to be here for that. Thank you, otherwise.January 15, 2014 – 11:35 amReplyCancel

  • Emily - I gotta say first that Don is quite a gifted storyteller and writer. You bring to life these experiences from your past and I can truly picture it all, down to the tears and wrinkles you describe. Thank you for sharing that – it’s clear that even though you never saw her again, she had a big impact on you from that encounter.January 15, 2014 – 9:27 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree, Emily! This story makes me wonder where Katy is now.January 15, 2014 – 9:38 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Awe, thank you, Emily. Honestly, these real people stories write themselves for the most part. I’m just glad to remember some of them.January 15, 2014 – 11:37 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - This was very poetic – beauty in tragedy. It brought me to tears. Don’s writing here was so deep – something I look for in books – a story that grips you and for an instant you become part of the scene. When it’s over, you wonder how everybody is doing though it was all fiction. The fact that this was real – just wow.January 15, 2014 – 9:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kenya, I got teary as well and you’re right – it’s such a compelling story. I wish we knew what happened next.January 15, 2014 – 9:59 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you for the amazing comment, Kenya! Really! I wonder sometimes about a lot of the people I’ve encountered over the years. I like to imagine their lives turned out better than most of them probably did.January 15, 2014 – 11:39 amReplyCancel

  • Janine Huldie - Wow, I totally was blown away by Don’t story here and actually a bit at a loss for words here. I was definitely shedding some tears about this poor woman’s experience and the optimist in me had hoped that there was more closure for this chance meeting, but still left me such a picture of that night and conversation, too. Thanks for sharing Don with us.January 15, 2014 – 9:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I was blown away by it too, Janine! Completely.January 15, 2014 – 10:08 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, Janine. I can still remember the night as though it happened last night, beers and all.January 15, 2014 – 11:41 amReplyCancel

  • Manal The Go Go Girl - Wow Don! I didn’t know he had a serious side to him. That was a beautiful and heart wrenching story. You probably made a huge difference in this woman’s life as she obviously impacted yours. Loved the writing! Thanks for sharing:)January 15, 2014 – 9:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Manal – I know! Actually he’s got a few serious posts and they’re really good. He has one about pulling over a woman in an intersection who didn’t have her toddler strapped into the carseat that’s amazing and got him Freshly Pressed. You should check it out.January 15, 2014 – 10:10 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Lol, yep, Manal, every now and then. I try not to do it too often, as it frightens my regular followers. Some stories are just too good not to share though. I like to think the just needed to share her story and move on with life someplace warmer.January 15, 2014 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle - Wow. That was such a gut wrenching story. I can’t imagine anything worse in life than losing my family. I am going to be visiting his blog for sure. Thanks for the introduction Kristi.January 15, 2014 – 10:40 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Yeah, I didn’t appreciate the gravity of it back then, but I really do now. Everybody has a story, I guess. Thank you, Michelle.January 15, 2014 – 11:46 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Michelle, you’ll love his blog I think. And yeah, pretty gut wrenching story…January 15, 2014 – 11:47 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ Golden Spoons - Wow! What a story. It does make you wonder what happened to Katy and what happened between the death of her husband & daughter that took her down such a difficult path. Where was her extended family?? Friends?? Great writing and great story, Don! Thanks for sharing!January 15, 2014 – 10:44 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, Lisa! I went jogging a few weeks ago and jogged past a man named Blue. He is an old black man, probably the oldest homeless guy I regularly dealt with. I had assumed he was probably dead years ago, but there he was a couple of weeks ago, drinking beer in a parking lot just as I remembered him. Lol. You never know. I’m sure this woman is doing just fine…I like to think so anyway.January 15, 2014 – 11:48 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Lisa, I was hoping that she ended up finding extended family too! I like to think that maybe she did…January 16, 2014 – 12:05 amReplyCancel

  • Jean - Teaching a lesson without preaching. Love it. Thanks Kristi and Don.January 15, 2014 – 11:11 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Funny Jean, I sort of questioned Kristi as to why it’s an “Our Land” type post, but she gets it better than me, obviously. Part of my concern was that there really didn’t seem to be a moral to the story or lesson to be learned. It was just a story.

      I guess the point is that we all have a story…don’t judge?January 15, 2014 – 11:53 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Thanks for getting it Jean. And Don, thanks for sharing it.January 16, 2014 – 12:06 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri @ Undiagnosed but okay - Wow. I love this, how we all just look over those most in pain. Rather than taking five minutes and a bottle to realize they are handling their pain not only the best way they know how but better than maybe we could. I think you brought some peace that day to Katy, Don. It’s why you ‘are a cop”January 15, 2014 – 11:24 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - I hope you’re right, Kerri. I did sort of feel like I “had” to go talk to her. I wasn’t having any fun in the bar. It’s not unusual for me to go outside with my beer and hang out alone with my thoughts. I had just gotten off work so loud crappy singing wasn’t doing it for me. Who knows?January 15, 2014 – 11:55 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree, Kerri! Who knows what stories the people who are so easily overlooked have?January 16, 2014 – 12:11 amReplyCancel

  • Twi - I imagine you have a horde of stories similar to this one. It’s funny which ones stick with you, though.January 15, 2014 – 11:28 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - It’s funny you say that because I was just telling somebody that I SHOULD have a tone of these stories! I mean I do, but it’s hard to recall most in any detail. Some I can, for whatever reason, like this one. If I could remember even half, I’d have a pretty good book to write! Lol. Thank you for reading it.January 15, 2014 – 11:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Twi, I so hope he tells them all at some point.January 16, 2014 – 12:26 amReplyCancel

  • that cynking feeling - One can only hope that everyone in law enforcement would embrace the spirit of “Our Land” like Don does.January 15, 2014 – 12:25 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - It takes all kinds to do the job right. Too many don’s would probably be a mess, but I do appreciate the sentiment for sure! Thanks for reading it.January 15, 2014 – 10:28 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Cync,
      Amen, sistah. I guess not all cops are dicks.January 16, 2014 – 12:27 amReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Fascinating to see the circumstances you end up in, Don – and always with SUCH compassion for people.January 15, 2014 – 1:25 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Drinking beer with homeless people is actually something I use to do pretty frequently, Lizzi. Lol. Thanks for reading and commenting as always!January 15, 2014 – 10:31 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Mostly with compassion for people. Have you read the fat posts? πŸ˜‰
      but yeah, I agree, DOAT rocks. Big.January 16, 2014 – 12:28 amReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - I am hysterically crying right now. What a beautiful, heartbreaking story, told so well, so perfectly, down to each and every word, each and every honest observation. Wow. I’ve seen you around the Kristi-o-sphere, Don, but I’d never checked out your blog. So glad I got a chance to read this. Just amazing.January 15, 2014 – 1:49 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thanks for reading it Deb, even though you’ve seen me around before (I’m sure I was misbehaving). These encounters really write themselves, when I’m able to remember them. This sort of meeting is just one of many I’ve had. They’re almost mundane to most officers (maybe not this particular story) that we lose sight of the fact that these circumstances are more the exception rather than the rule, if that makes sense.January 15, 2014 – 10:34 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Deb sweets! I agree that it was amazingly and beautifully written and I cried like crazy too. Also (sorry but you know – the about me part – I think I might love the term “Kristi-o-sphere.” Like for real.January 16, 2014 – 12:30 amReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - Wow. I was completely lost in this story and just now pulled myself out of it… you are a gifted writer Don! And the story you shared was powerful.. poetic really. I have a feeling you have many many more where that came from, and surely there are countless hearts that need your voice.

    I know I have read a few of them in the past- this brings me the urgency to find and follow you, so I don’t miss any more captivating moments ever again. XOJanuary 15, 2014 – 2:14 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thanks, Chris, I really appreciate this comment. I’m not normally so captivating, so don’t get your hopes up too high! lol.January 15, 2014 – 10:36 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Chris, I agree that he’s gifted. He’s got amazing stories and they’re utterly compelling. You should totally follow him.January 16, 2014 – 12:31 amReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - This story gave me chills. We rarely think about how close we are to tragedy like the kind Katy experienced. It can completely alter our life’s path if we allow it.January 15, 2014 – 2:25 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - You’re absolutely right, Nicole. One bad decision or accident can change everything. There’s only so much a person can take before they snap. I like to think she moved on and is doing fine somewhere.January 15, 2014 – 10:41 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Nichole, I agree that our stories change our lives. I’m not sure there’s a way around life altercation with a story like Katy’s. Sad.January 16, 2014 – 12:32 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - Wow, Don – serious looks good on you. Everyone has a story, and it’s not always what we expect it will be. Thanks for bringing Don to Our Land, Kristi!January 15, 2014 – 2:34 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, Dana. My most popular posts are “serious” ones. I may have to share more of them. I like talking to strangers and hearing their stories. Sometimes, you hit gold with an interesting tale.January 15, 2014 – 10:44 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I agree that serious looks good on Don, Dana! I loved this story, so much, but also didn’t love it because it’s probably so much more common than we realize, you know? Sigh.January 16, 2014 – 12:33 amReplyCancel

  • Jessica - You do have a gift for storytelling, Don. My heart was racing as she started to tell her story, and I was bawling by the end. I probably shouldn’t have read it at work. πŸ™‚ But it was captivating, and definitely goes along with something I am making a point to remember — everyone has their own struggles, and we should have compassion for them and not judge, because we’ll never fully know the whole story. I can’t even imagine having to go through what Katy did, and I wonder if I could have been any stronger (I doubt it). I can only pray that she is OK now. Thanks so much for sharing this.January 15, 2014 – 2:57 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you very much, Jessica. It took me a long time to really embrace empathy and compassion for others, especially dirtbags. I mean some folks are just mean. Having kids really caused me to try to see good in everyone I meet. Everyone was somebody’s baby once, right?January 15, 2014 – 10:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jessica, I’m pretty sure I’d be even worse off than Katy were something similar to happen to me and you’re right – the reminder that everybody has a story and that we shouldn’t judge is powerful and important.January 16, 2014 – 12:37 amReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Whoa. I am mostly speechless here. (wordless Wednesday, I guess?)
    If it happened to any other cop (other than bike cop Don), I don’t know that they would have held onto the story and released it the way you just did.
    Would love to hear whatever happened to her. Maybe it’s better if I just fill in the blanks with nice, happy stuff.January 15, 2014 – 3:11 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, Tamara! Sadly, there’s not a lot of time for on duty city cops to sit down and chat with people. That sort of sucks. I share your mindset about happy thoughts though. She’s probably on a beach with her new husband and kids right now, right?January 15, 2014 – 10:54 pmReplyCancel

  • Jen @ Real Life Parenting - Once again, I was reading along, totally sucked in. Don, you have a book in your head. (I mean that in the sensible way.) You have these amazing experiences and people you’ve met paired with the ability to tell their story and weave such gripping tales.

    Loved this!January 15, 2014 – 3:12 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thanks, Jen, you’re pretty ok yourself. I appreciate it and I’m glad we’re buds.January 15, 2014 – 10:59 pmReplyCancel

  • Little Miss Wordy - Beautiful story. Reminds me of some of my own during my job at a home less shelter in Houston years ago. I’m not surprised at how touching and we’ll written this piece is as I’ve been following “Bike Cop Dan” for some time now. He’s written some powerful posts.January 15, 2014 – 3:23 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, LMW, I appreciate it. Homelessness it a tough on to deal with…kudos to you!January 15, 2014 – 11:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Tarana - This is the first I’ve read of Don’s writing, and wow! I couldn’t stop reading until the end.January 15, 2014 – 4:34 pmReplyCancel

  • Cowboys and Crossbones - I love me some DOAT. And he never fails to get you with his poignant storytelling because he kicks ass, of course.January 15, 2014 – 5:31 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Hooorah! Thanks for coming over here to visit me sweetness! I hope Teddy and you enjoyed it! Rock on!January 15, 2014 – 11:07 pmReplyCancel

  • donofalltrades - Thank you, LMW, I appreciate it. Homelessness it a tough on to deal with…kudos to you!January 15, 2014 – 11:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - That sounds like something out of a movie! I actually used to know an old homeless guy around town who was usually seen stumbling around with a bottle of vodka. I can’t swear it is true, but someone told me that he used to be wealthy… he had some sort of very skilled career, which I was told was painting prosthetic eyes… but his son drowned, and he just gave up everything. I can imagine doing that… being so heartbroken that you just can’t go on living, yet something keeps you from actually killing yourself, so you just sort of walk away from your life.January 15, 2014 – 11:26 pmReplyCancel

    • don - I remember a homeless man in our area was a former Washington University professor I believe and/or a successful engineer. I never did meet up with him. I knew another gentleman who looked homeless, but always had a bunch of cash on himself, who would come drink at the same bar I did and sit and talk out loud to himself. He was certainly not all there in the head, but he was supposedly a PhD and overall very intelligent man at some point in his life. You just never know, really.January 23, 2014 – 3:18 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - We tend to forget that these people are just that…real people with real lives.
    I love that you shared this.January 16, 2014 – 7:13 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - It took me a long time to get there mentally, but you’re right. Having kids helped me to see other people as people, even the bad or unfortunate ones. All babies once, but something just went wrong somewhere along the way.January 23, 2014 – 3:21 pmReplyCancel

  • brickhousechick - I know that guy, Don. Well I don’t know him know him, but you know what I mean. I can only hope and pray that my son be at least half the policeman Don is. πŸ™‚January 16, 2014 – 4:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. - Don, you amaze me with your depth and insight. Go ahead, say something smartass to deflect the praise. Go on.January 16, 2014 – 5:47 pmReplyCancel

    • don - If I wasn’t so sure that you were being sarcastic, I’d say something like giggity for you being amazed by my depth! Lol!

      But really, thank you Steph, you’re the best! Well, one of the best. Shhh, I don’t want Kristi to get jealous. Older women are funny like that. Oh, shhhh to that part too…January 23, 2014 – 3:29 pmReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - Wow. I have horrible waking nightmares about things like that. And in them I wind up just like her. A shell just waiting for my turn.
    It’s too bad she didn’t come back. It would have been good if she had, but I’m sure once she told you, you were only a reminder.January 16, 2014 – 6:03 pmReplyCancel

    • don - You could be right about being a reminder. She may not have wanted to ever discuss it again and was worried she’d have to repeat the story? Or, maybe she was just more drunk than I noticed and forgot the whole encounter? I don’t know.January 23, 2014 – 3:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Cheryl - Aaaw, Don. I just read your post over on DOAT and got tears and boogers all cleaned up off my keyboard and now I have to do it again. But seriously… you, my friend, are good people.January 16, 2014 – 8:55 pmReplyCancel

  • Sarah Almond - Don of All Trades. Just when you think you have him figured out he shows that he’s all sensitive and stuff. Once again I’m amazed at the variety of things that we have on Our Land. No group of people left behind! Thanks for sharing this story Don!January 17, 2014 – 12:25 amReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Thank you, Sarah! Don’t go telling anyone that I’m all sensitive and stuff though, ya got that? Okay, thanks!January 23, 2014 – 4:02 pmReplyCancel

  • Katia - I’m kind of speechless right now. You should write a book, Don.January 18, 2014 – 2:27 pmReplyCancel

    • donofalltrades - Oh sweet, sweet Katia, thank you very much. I wouldn’t even know where to begin or what to write about, but I like the idea!January 23, 2014 – 4:17 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - I’ve already become an instant fan of Don’s. I relate to him so very easily. Most definitely someone I would want to have a beer or 5 with. Great post and thank you for sharing him, Kristi! πŸ™‚February 1, 2014 – 9:47 pmReplyCancel

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