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Saying goodbye can be hard but music helps

While some goodbyes are more difficultly said than others, I’m of the opinion that all goodbyes are hard. At least, they are for me.

Even in the uncomfortable situations in which I find myself counting the minutes until I’m able to leave, there’s always a final question in my mind that maybe, by leaving, I’ll miss the very best part.  I’ll miss the one worthwhile joke, discussion, or meaningful exchange. I might miss the dance.

Whether it’s a party, a family gathering, or a relationship, saying goodbye feels so final.

Take the long-term relationship that I had. I knew that it was over. I knew that it wasn’t healthy. And yet, I stayed. I stayed and I stayed, in part because goodbye felt too much like forever. It was easy to think about how much time I’d invested into it. To remember the laughter, the tears, and the meaningful moments.

I finally said goodbye. And then, I sent him the lyrics to Garth Brooks’ song The Dance, because you know, sending somebody goodbye song lyrics totally makes up for the fact that you broke his heart.

AngelGoodAngelBadGarthBrooks

Looking back on the memory of
The dance we shared beneath the stars above
For a moment all the world was right
How could I have known you’d ever say goodbye
And now I’m glad I didn’t know The way it all would end …the way it all would go,
Our lives are better left to chance
I could have missed the pain

What’s all this blather about goodbyes, you wonder? Well, today marks the final day for Twisted Mixed Tape Tuesday, created by Jen Kehl from My Skewed View. I was there when she first started this fabulous exchange, and want to be there when she says goodbye to it, at least for now (and don’t worry, she’ll be back in the fall with a new monthly format, so this particular goodbye does not have to be a forever one).  

In trying to figure out when Jen began this mixed tape blog hop, I consulted some old text messages. Some weeks, I’ve had to ask her for a little clarification.

Text one            Text 2Anyway.

One year, my dad and I drove from Denver to San Francisco for my cousin’s wedding. I made a mixed tape for the trip, filled with music that I thought my dad would tolerate (as in no Metallica or Duran Duran) so that we didn’t have to listen to classical the combined 50+ hours we’d be in the car.

It turned out that I did a pretty good job, because one of my favorite memories is singing along to American Pie by Don McLean with my dad. This song sweeps me away, every single time.

To wrap it up today, the following should be sung to the tune of “Goodbye Yellow Brick Road.”
Here is my original, never before seen musical farewell to Twisted Mixed Tape Tuesday:

Goodbye Twisted Mixed Tape!
We’ll see you later this year…
You’ve been fun to join with wondering how Kerri will mess up…
Goodbye Twisted Mixed Tape!
Thanks so much to Jen. 
lalalala la la la la
…and that’s the end to this song.

Goodbye twisted mixed tape

What about you? Are goodbyes hard for you to say, even when they’re said out of necessity?


by Kristi Campbell

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  • Kenya G. Johnson - I skimmed! I had heart palpitations that you were saying goodbye to blogging with no warning 😉 Whew!April 15, 2014 – 11:09 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Sorry Kenya! I didn’t even think about that. I promise, I’ll let you know if I’m thinking of quitting, okay?April 15, 2014 – 5:21 pmReplyCancel

  • Emily - I am terrible at good-byes too…especially when we are at a party. My husband always tells me to start saying good-bye about 30 minutes before he actually wants to leave because he knows I’m a pro at the “Jewish good-bye.” (which takes forever..). Anyway, great songs and I’ve always enjoyed reading these twisted mix tape posts…maybe when Jen restarts them in the fall, I’ll consider participating once in a while….April 15, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ha, Emily! I know what you mean about the long “Jewish good-bye!” Love it. And I hope you will join in September, I’ve found some really cool new songs from participating in this one.April 15, 2014 – 5:24 pmReplyCancel

  • Chris Carter - AW!! I know this has been a BIG deal and wonderful link up for so many bloggers!! Sad to see it go, but I’m sure it will come back with a MIGHTY PUNCH in the fall!!April 15, 2014 – 11:16 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m sad to see it go too but I know it’s super time-consuming for Jen. Hope you’ll join us in September!April 15, 2014 – 6:06 pmReplyCancel

  • clark - thank you as well, for being one of the hostinae to bring the chance to hang out, musicistically-speaking.

    (shit, that Breakfast Club reference, think it might be a little too… historic? lol)

    (you realize that you have the initial wholesome appeal of Molly with the dark, who-the-hell-would-have-the-nerve-to-dare-you inner clarklike female of Ally)

    see you at the next detentionApril 15, 2014 – 11:56 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Aw thanks, Clark! And I love the Breakfast Club reference and that I’m both Molly and Ally! Molly’s name is Claire in it though right?
      I’ll bring the spit-wads, if you bring the straw!April 15, 2014 – 6:08 pmReplyCancel

  • Quickstepp Melissa - Damn….no you didn’t go The Dance on someone!? Awesome way to end it. Loved the American Pie dad singalong image!April 15, 2014 – 12:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - *blushing* I totally did The Dance on somebody! Thanks, Melissa!April 15, 2014 – 6:09 pmReplyCancel

      • Twindaddy - Sadly, I never have my helmet on at those times…April 15, 2014 – 9:03 pmReplyCancel

  • Kir - “The Dance” is one of my favorite songs and I just adore Garth. That song brings me to tears whenever I hear it (DAMN IT, this mascara!)

    and those texts were funny and adorable! Plus your original song was very well written.

    See you in the fall.April 15, 2014 – 1:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - Oh no! I’ll miss Twisted Mix Tape!
    At least I have your goodbye song to keep me warm at night.
    And cute Tucker cameo!April 15, 2014 – 1:50 pmReplyCancel

  • Twindaddy - I HATE goodbyes….April 15, 2014 – 2:21 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, they fuckin’ suck. But I’ll bet it’s easy to hide your goodbye tears under, um, say, like, a helmet. Just saying.April 15, 2014 – 6:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Kerri - HAHAHAHA I absolutely love Tucker video bombing your goodbye song. Thanks for enjoying my mixed up tapes. BTW they are your fault for inviting me to join. You know what a screw up I am!!! See you on the flip side of the mix tape in the fallApril 15, 2014 – 2:33 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Kerri, he rocked the video bomb, huh? I kept thinking maybe I should redo it, and almost stopped when he started hollering about the lights being off (God forbid ALL the lights are not on ALL the time).
      HAHA to it being my fault that you joined and messed up in the first place. Guess you have a point!April 15, 2014 – 6:12 pmReplyCancel

  • Allie - I am horrible at goodbyes when they are long distance. I love far form people I love and whenever we visit, I’m a total mess when it’s time to say goodbye. And then we he the really tough and sad goodbyes…April 15, 2014 – 5:15 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Allie,
      Me too! My family is all in Colorado and Montana, and my husband’s family is in Tennessee, and every single time (!) that I leave Denver, I bawl. Not in a pretty-looking sweet way really, either.April 15, 2014 – 6:13 pmReplyCancel

  • Angel The Alien - I tried to listen to the whole American Pie song, but after four hours I had to pause it! My favorite, of course, is the one you sang!April 15, 2014 – 6:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Angel no big deal on not listening to the whole thing! It’s a (even before I was aware of music and likely before you were born thing) about the deaths of rock and roll musicians Buddy Holly, Ritchie Valens, and J. P. They all died in a plane crash, which is why the whole bye bye thing. And YAY to the mine being your favorite of course 😀April 15, 2014 – 11:11 pmReplyCancel

  • Louise - Your duet with Tucker is awesome.

    Or you might be a duo. I’ll let Jen be the official last word on that nuance…. She appears to have expertise.

    In unrelated thoughts – could Jen pull of Marilyn for Halloween? Inquiring minds and all that…

    I love your send off. I love that you guys did this hop. I’m sad it’s taking a break. But I get why.

    I’m trying to think of it like high school – in the “Have a Great Summer!!!” yearbook signing kind of way.

    I love your two other musical choices, though sorry that The Dance brings mixed memories.

    As for American Pie – forgive me for not watching the whole video? I love the song; I love the album; I can sing bits of Vincent, so … pass?April 15, 2014 – 9:35 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Nobody ever has to listen to the entire American Pie. We all get it. It’s really only the best, on a road trip, in like maybe 1992, taken with my dad, and singing along. Because then? 8 minutes seems awesome. 😀
      I love that we did this hop, too, and I’m big sad. But also get it. And we will be back. I love the yearbook signing analysis. Here’s to an amazing summer and I know we’ll still connect this fall!! xoxoxo
      F@K yes Jen could do Marilyn for Halloween!!! GAH! 😀April 15, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Bianca @ Rant Rave Crave - That was the first time I actually listened to the lyrics of The Dance. Now I know why so many people told me I should listen to it when I had a really bad breakup. Also I like your little ditty there. Elton John would be proud 🙂April 15, 2014 – 9:48 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Really? Wow. It’s cheesy, but it’s GOOD for the breakups. Big good for the breakups. Thanks for liking my lame old ditty!!!April 15, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - This is so awesome, especially your own song! Hi Tucker! 🙂 I have fond memories of singing with my dad in the car to “Chantilly Lace.” “Oooh baby, that’s what I like!” LOL Music is so awesome.April 16, 2014 – 1:16 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hehe! Love that you sang Chantilly Lace with your dad! And yeah, music really is so awesome. Tucker says hi 😀April 16, 2014 – 11:01 amReplyCancel

  • Nicole @ Work in Sweats Mama - Sometimes a song says it best. And, that’s the best graphic EVER! And goodbyes suck. Hard.April 16, 2014 – 10:19 amReplyCancel

  • Kelly L McKenzie - I’m in the throes of goodbyes a lot lately what with my two going to uni across the country. While I’m a quiet mess on the way to the airport I keep it hidden. They are so aware of the impending separation that they don’t need soppy mama in the mix. I always say as we part “This just means it is closer to the time we see each other again.” Helps me – and I think it helps them. BUT. Goodbyes are hell. Yes. Hell. Each and every time.April 16, 2014 – 11:08 amReplyCancel

  • Cathy Harlow - You are so awesome!!!April 16, 2014 – 12:48 pmReplyCancel

  • Kimberly - Oh I love you…despite your love of country. It’s ok. We all have those awkward stages. You’ve grown out of it right?
    That song made me smile. I needed that today 🙂April 16, 2014 – 7:38 pmReplyCancel

  • marcia @ Menopausal Mother - You did a great job with this, Kristi. I always hated saying goodbye too, because it DID feel like forever! Sadly, some of the people I said goodbye to I still haven’t seen in 30 years.April 18, 2014 – 8:35 pmReplyCancel

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