Finding Ninee » Sharing our parenting and special needs stories with heart and humor.

What’s mom wearing?

Do you guys watch the awards shows? Like you know, the Grammys and the Oscars and whatever other ones there are?

I used to. But, now, I don’t even know when they’re on until I find out that they’re already happening and almost over via Twitter. I just don’t care what Angelina is wearing. I don’t care whether her dress cost her $18,000 or $28,000 or $1,089,211 for the show because it’s all just dumb. I admit that I love some celebrity gossip as much as the next person, and am guilty of subscribing to People Magazine. But the stars? They’re just people with access to personal chefs, plastic surgery, designer clothing, and 24 x 7 childcare.

When it comes to “WHO” the stars are wearing this year? Other than thinking that they mostly look ridiculous, because I don’t live under a giant rock and did see Madonna’s disgusting gold teeth, it sickens me that Huff Post did this Mean Girls Video. I mean seriously, what a couple of bitches. They’re like “OMG it’s like the stupidest dress I’ve ever seen.” It’s not like I don’t agree. The dress they were talking about was really stupid-looking, but who cares?

Some blogger friends and I were talking about the awards, and the feminist selfie movement going around and decided to share what we wear. 

Tabloid drama about who’s wearing which designer has got nothing on this mama.

See? Look:

Selfie 45 years old

This is glamour.

What’s mom wearing? For those of you who are fashion conscious and are looking to duplicate my simple, yet elegant and comfortable effort, the (unseen) sweatpants are from Victoria’s Secret and I think the style is “Boyfriend.” Hole in the crotch only comes with daily wearing, so, just wear them daily for a similar effect.

The Colorado t-shirt was an impulse purchase from The Denver International Airport on a trip when I was feeling especially nostalgic about having to leave my home state. I think the designer is Taiwan, but I’m not sure. Could be Vera Wang. Likely, as it’s one of my most flattering go-to’s. 

When it comes to mom-wear, I’ve often got four-year-old food-fingerprints and crayon on my sleeve, a variety of robot or airplane stickers in my hair, and, occasionally, a little boy on my stomach, my head, or on my shoulders. If I were accepting an award for my mom attire, the speech would likely include more about the etiquette of giving my little boy a shoulder ride than a designer.

Here’s Tucker on my shoulders.  Guess I’m wearing Boy, tonight…and the hair in my face is chic, in case you were wondering.

This is what I get for asking my hubs to take a pic and him saying "YEAH, it came out."

This is what I get for asking my hubs to take a pic and him saying “YEAH, it came out.”

And here’s me, on the red carpet. The real, classless me is imagining me in some poser-worthy dress.

Red carpet real and imagined-2

And here’s me, giving my speech:

No wearing penis on neck

The penis on my neck was a real concern. Tucker wanted a shoulder ride. He wasn’t wearing pants. I told him that he needed to put on pants because I didn’t want his penis on my neck. I mean, even this mom, as sloppy as she is, doesn’t wear penises in the daylight, right?

I’ll admit that I do actually get dressed in almost used-to-be-fashionable clothes for work and other in-public sightings. Sometimes, I’ll even sport a label that people may recognize as being hip and overpriced. But mostly, I wear something along the lines of mom mess. Because hello, function.

What about you?  We wanna know, #WhoAreYOUWearingMom ? Share your mom wear with us on Facebook and Twitter, and link up, bloggers (open until Sunday night)! Let’s let the world know about REAL mom-fashion!

sawardsea

Your kickass hosts:

Jen at My Skewed View
Jean at Mama Schmama
Sarah at Left Brain Buddha
Stephanie at Mommy, For Real
Deb at Urban Moo Cow
Sarah at The Sadder but Wiser Girl
Katia at I am the Milk
Rachel at Tao of Poop
Jane at Nothing by the Book
Me!

 




by Kristi Campbell

email a friend

  • Sarah Almond - I am proud to be a part of this where two of my friends used the word penis in their posts. BA HA HA! I could totally write a song about this. Don’t worry, I won’t.

    You look good lady-Angelina’s got nothing on you. If I had to choose I’d choose you EVERY stinking time over those silly celebrities. Except Ellen… then I’d have to toss a coin. 😉January 29, 2014 – 12:00 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA Sarah. I’d actually really like it if you were to write a song about it. Is that weird? And yeah, I’d pick Ellen over me, too. Can’t blame you there.January 29, 2014 – 8:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Rachel - I wouldn’t spend 10K on a dress either. On the other hand, I would give ANY amount of money to see and hear you give that speech at an awards show. That would be priceless. Really, though, you and Tucker are priceless and beautiful. Can I say I love you? Fuck, I already did. I’m feeling sentimental right about now. I really like this idea, and I’m in awe of how it looks live. I feel really empowered seeing all of these beautiful mamas in their full glory, including you, including me. Yay, us!January 29, 2014 – 12:11 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - How fun would it be to actually give that speech at an awards show? And thanks for the podium idea – best part of the post (which I’m still editing).
      Awww. I love you too. I really like this idea, too and LOVE how it looks live. We rock, us mamas do. Our wrinkles, our lives, us. We do. We should remember it more often.January 29, 2014 – 8:46 pmReplyCancel

  • Mike - LOL…I literally have tears in my eyes from laughing so hard, Kristi! First the hole in the crotch of the pants, then “This is what I get for asking my hubs to take a pic and him saying ‘YEAH, it came out.'” Then wearing penises on your neck. I can not stop giggling, laughing as it just all hit my funny bone. I took my prescription glasses off and I could see Tucker’s adorable, beaming smile perfectly as he was perched atop your shoulders. I checked out of watching the awards shows a long time ago! And for no make up…you got it going on just fine, our friend! 🙂January 29, 2014 – 12:19 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Yeah, well the taking the glasses off ain’t gonna do much because hubs too a horrible photo…but yay to you getting the penis on the neck thing being not so awesome. The awards shows? WHO CARES?January 29, 2014 – 11:27 pmReplyCancel

  • Jessica - LOL, this is hilarious. But I am confused, I can’t find the chin fat in that picture! I see why you want all those camera lessons, too. For the hubby, right? YIKES! 😉 Also: I love the Colorado shirt, and that is serious. I need to get one next time I am there. 🙂 I think Tucker is the best accessory ever. When he’s clothed, of course!January 29, 2014 – 12:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Well the angle makes a difference I guess but trust me, it’s there. And hahah to the camera lessons!!! He’s a moron!!!January 29, 2014 – 11:28 pmReplyCancel

  • Considerer - Pretty epic win, wearing Tucker – he’s priceless 🙂January 29, 2014 – 2:09 amReplyCancel

  • linda Atwell - Out One Ear - I have a hole in the crotch of my sweatpants too! I’m totally amazed that it is there because I could see one opening up between my thighs with all the rubbing that goes on in that area of my body. But I swear, what’s rubbed against the crotch of these pants consistently enough to create a hole? At least I can’t remember anything specific. But that’s all I’m gonna admit to in that regards. I generally wear Lands End because it is comfortable. Other than that, I’m most often seen in yoga pants around the house and a comfy T or layered shirts and zip-up thingees.

    And of course, this whole post cracked me up. Especially the penis part. Happy Tuesday.January 29, 2014 – 2:20 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - REALLY??? For real, you’ve had a hole in your sweats? I think it happens systematically where they just want us to buy new ones. Little do they know, we have friends in high places with needle and thad.
      I love me some yoga pants but I never wear them. Why? No pockets and I need y phone. Who sucks now???January 29, 2014 – 11:51 pmReplyCancel

  • donofalltrades - Hahahahah, Kristi! Penis on the neck indeed. You ain’t got no chin fat but whatever. You look like you used to rock a black concert tshirt pretty good back in the day.January 29, 2014 – 2:37 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Dude you wish you saw the concert shirts back then, much better than now but like you said, whatever. And yeah. Pennis on the neck? Not the same when it’s your kid. Also ick to whatever you were thinking anyway.January 29, 2014 – 11:53 pmReplyCancel

  • Jhanis - Hahahaha I love your speech! I just had a blog tour to check all the #WhoAreYOUWearingMom of all the hosts and I am loving this err movement! 🙂January 29, 2014 – 5:28 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah | LeftBrainBuddha - LOL!! And seriously, you do not have chin fat!!! You look awesome, mama!January 29, 2014 – 6:14 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I do actually have chin fat but I think the photo was feeling guilty for the other stuff…we all look awesome! I’m loving this post.January 30, 2014 – 12:15 amReplyCancel

  • Kenya G. Johnson - LOL! I love this – I seriously can’t get organized to blog much right now otherwise I’d be on it. Otherwise here’s what I’m wearing – A shirt from Old Navy that says Slinky – Everybody love slinky. And I’ve got on name brand yoga pants “Champion”. When they were new I tried to wear them with boots but the Champion logo and the bottom of the pants gave me away and I decided I couldn’t pull it off. I am wearing the cutest slippers I just found at JCP on clearance for $6.97. I was really excited. They are name brand too – Isotoner and they have fake leopard fur on them.

    Once upon a time I used to watch those awards shoes from the 6 o’clock hour on to practically midnight. After that I started recording it and fast forwarding through, then after than recording and never watching. Now I don’t even record it.January 29, 2014 – 6:47 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I can imagine the chaos of the kitchen! When we bought the place we’re in now, we did a huge remodel. It was horrible. Buuuuuuttt…the hop will be open until Sunday if you decide that it’s a bummer to miss showing the world your awesome new Isotoners! Everybody loves Slinky! 😀January 30, 2014 – 8:28 amReplyCancel

  • Jean - Touching, honest, soulful, then penis on the neck. And I wouldn’t want it any other way. Gorgeous, Kristi. I think blurry mom and kid pictures are a genre of their own. We have a bazillion of those on my computer.January 29, 2014 – 9:02 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Ach to the blurry mom kid photos. I still can’t believe the hubs thought that “it turned out!” Doh.January 30, 2014 – 8:29 amReplyCancel

  • Katia - Penis neck illustration killed it! I wish I’d thought of that, as I had many similar incidents, including penis neck’s cousin – butt in face. This was hilarious, I SO enjoyed reading this! As for the wrinkles? Meh. You’re a natural beauty.January 29, 2014 – 9:21 amReplyCancel

  • thedoseofreality - Crying with laughter!! I am so doing a selfie next year with what I wear for all the awards shows…Hollywood has nothing on my flannel jammies! ;)-AshleyJanuary 29, 2014 – 9:33 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Flannel Jammies are divine! And we’re doing the hop until Sunday – you guys should join us with some of your Pinterest No’s!!January 30, 2014 – 8:30 amReplyCancel

  • Dana - I’ve seen you in nice clothes, so I can vouch for you on that point. I don’t even know when the Oscars are on, but I know I’ll be wearing pajamas. Really fancy ones from Costco.January 29, 2014 – 9:51 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - And Dana, you’ll rock those fancy Costco pajamas. Totally. And I think they’re on Sunday (and only know that because of this post).January 30, 2014 – 8:34 amReplyCancel

  • Synnove @ Don't Chew On The Dinner Table! - I figured my post still might work as we are all still wearing “blue”… 🙂January 29, 2014 – 10:22 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Synnove, yup! Your post totally works and is hilarious. And a bit close to home…January 30, 2014 – 8:35 amReplyCancel

  • Kate - Penis on the neck is SO 2009. Glad you’re up on the trends.January 29, 2014 – 11:15 amReplyCancel

  • Ilene - Do you and I have use the same designer? Wrinkles, bags, no makeup? Ha! (Not that I’m saying you have wrinkles and bags. You said it first!) And I love the way you wear Tucker. That’s the best mom fashion anywhere.January 29, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I do have wrinkles and bags so that’s cool. I’m old and stuff. And yeah, Tucker is the best fashion ever.January 30, 2014 – 8:51 amReplyCancel

  • Kerri - HA!!!! I love your look and will hook up with you to describe what I am wearing this awards season. Thanks, again, for NOT drawing that penis on your neckJanuary 29, 2014 – 11:50 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Oh man! I totally should have drawn a penis on my neck. Maybe next time.January 30, 2014 – 8:57 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Also, for some reason, Disqus is not letting me comment. But I will be back because it was so sweet of you to make a mixed tape for Jen!January 30, 2014 – 11:34 amReplyCancel

  • Beth Teliho - I thought I had found my favorite line: “They’re just people with access to personal chefs, plastic surgery, designer clothing, and 24 x 7 childcare.” (BTW YES YES YES!)

    UNTIL I saw this one:” I mean, even this mom, as sloppy as she is, doesn’t wear penises in the daylight, right?”

    LOL you are my kinda funny, Kristi! And and and you’re stunning. STUNNINGLY BEAUTIFUL REAL.

    This reminds me of a quick “penis on my neck” story. When my oldest son was about 3yo, we were at the zoo on a very hot, Texas afternoon. My husband was carrying said 3yo on his shoulders. Towards the end of the day (you know, by the warthogs) we hear, “Oh shit, I leaked.”
    Yep. My 3yo said that. and he peed all over the back of Jim’s neck, his shirt, down his back….and I laughed my ass off. It continued to bake on him until we could get home. It was awfulawesome. But I will never forget what my son said! Wonder where he learnt them werds?January 29, 2014 – 12:29 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Beth, I’m LAUGHING MY ASS off that your son said “Oh shit, I leaked!” and that your husband had penis AND pee all over his neck and back and shirt and hahah! That’s so awesome. Seriously.January 30, 2014 – 11:36 amReplyCancel

  • Stephanie @ Mommy, for Real. - You are fucking gorgeous, lady. And also- way to pioneer the “Just Say No to Neck Penis” campaign. Can I tweet that? That should bring you some pageviews. Totally tweeting it. I don’t care what the celebrities are wearing either. I’m all about comfort these days. Love this, and your perfect face!January 29, 2014 – 2:02 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HAHA thanks for tweeting the No to Neck Penis Campaign. You are the bombdiggity. For Real.January 30, 2014 – 11:43 amReplyCancel

  • that cynking feeling - I knew I should have taken a selfie the day I had splotches of antibiotic on my pants at work. Yes, most of the medicine ended up on me instead of in the toddler’s mouth. I had the sense not to put on my work shirt, but I thought my pants would be safe.
    Oh, well. I’m sure I’ll have an equally exciting stain to share in the coming week.January 29, 2014 – 2:22 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - HA. I love that you went to work with antibiotic stains on your pants (my son won’t take medicine by mouth either which sucks because I never know if he got any down so then the doses get all screwed up). You should join in on this! It’s open until Sunday!January 30, 2014 – 11:54 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah - In the end, I bet we dress very much the same. We just came at the prompt a different way. What is it with no pants? My daughter wants to be pants-less, but insist on underwear, at a minimum, at the dinner table. Good for you for setting those boundaries! 🙂January 29, 2014 – 6:32 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - You rock for insisting on underwear at the dinner table! Ha. Also, Tucker refuses to wear underwear unless it’s the super-baggy kind that ends up riding up over his waistband when he pulls up his pants. So he’s a commando kid.
      I love how you did the prompt!January 30, 2014 – 11:56 amReplyCancel

  • JenKehl - My Skewed View - LOL we both said penis in our posts! Inevitable with boys, right?? I love that your husband said it came out! My husband would have taken 50 pictures from 50 different angles, and I would have said, “Do it again!!”
    You look awesome, you are hilarious, and love the “real” you so much more than the backless dress poser you. Which would Billy like? 😉 😉
    TTTX10!January 29, 2014 – 7:16 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - hehhehehe penis penis penis! My husband is obviously much, much lazier than yours is. Hm. I think Billy might like poser me…but he’s old and ugly now anyway.January 30, 2014 – 11:57 amReplyCancel

  • Michelle - This is just hilarious. One of my non blogging guy friends sent me a funny post about bathrobes vs yoga pants that he thought I would enjoy. It was hysterical. I have gone out in public looking less than stellar for sure, but in a bathrobe, no. I did once go out apparently not looking too great and ran into a friendly acquaintance that asked me what happened to me. LOLJanuary 29, 2014 – 7:42 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Hey thanks, Michelle – I just got really proud of myself that I’ve never worn a bathrobe anywhere. I feel downright classy!
      That’s funny (not really but ok it is) that your friend asked what happened to you! Ha.January 30, 2014 – 12:00 pmReplyCancel

  • Deb @ Urban Moo Cow - STOOOOOOOOOOOOOOP. PENIS ON THE NECK LOLOLOLOLOL! I heart you, and your photo up top is beautiful. You can’t see the wrinkles because your beauty outshines them!January 29, 2014 – 8:45 pmReplyCancel

  • Tamara - I definitely don’t want penis on my neck! I think?
    What I’m wearing is a rain poncho. And what I’m doing is comparing myself to the Disney princeses I met yesterday at the Magic Kingdom. They were just so young and fresh and kind to all of the sweating imbeciles they must see each day.
    I felt..ugly. And it sucked.January 29, 2014 – 10:26 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - I’m SO JEALOUS that you’re rightTHISveryMINUTE in sunny Florida, taking Magical photos in the Magical Kingdom with your Magical family! And I’m sorry that you felt ugly but I promise you on my honor that you are stunningly gorgeous. For real. Screw those dumb young girls. They don’t even know what life’s about yet…January 30, 2014 – 12:05 pmReplyCancel

  • Lisa @ The Meaning of Me - Clearly I have missed a great blog hop in this. I was thoroughly enjoying your post (it being the fourth or fifth I saw among my bloggy friends) and then…the penis neck thing. I spit out my tea. And I haven’t stopped laughing since. I’m so mature.January 29, 2014 – 11:09 pmReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Haha Lisa. Glad your maturity level rivals mine. It’s not too late to join us – the hop is open until Sunday!January 30, 2014 – 12:06 pmReplyCancel

  • Lady Lilith - I like your attitude. We should be focusing on what counts rather then other nonsense.January 30, 2014 – 12:07 amReplyCancel

  • Real Life Parenting - I also stay away from the Penis on the Neck fashion. I just never liked it … kind of like lacy socks with pumps. Just wasn’t my thing.

    Love this!January 30, 2014 – 9:46 amReplyCancel

  • Natalie DeYoung - You never know…penis jewelry might be coming to a runway near you next season!January 30, 2014 – 11:18 amReplyCancel

  • Sarah Day - I once went to work with a yogurt handprint on my back. It was THE rage that season.January 30, 2014 – 9:04 pmReplyCancel

  • Jean - I’m back here for sharing purposes and I reread your part about how celebrities have it all for them. That’s what pisses me off so much about Giselle criticizing moms for not losing the weight immediately, etc. She is an expert at her image, that’s her JOB and she gets a lot of help doing that. She would suck if she had to fill your professional shoes for a day and I bet she couldn’t differentiate a lesson plan to save her life. Do we criticize her for that? No.
    rant over. 🙂January 31, 2014 – 10:07 amReplyCancel

    • Kristi Campbell - Jean,
      You’re SO RIGHT and I’m going to start openly criticizing Giselle for not knowing how to do our jobs. And yeah, she gets so much help doing that. I’d look awesome, too, if it were my freaking JOB!!!February 1, 2014 – 9:38 pmReplyCancel

  • Brittnei - Oh my goodness! This is so funny! I honestly hate celebrity gossip and I could care or less what any of them are wearing or doing. I don’t watch any of the shows. Funny about Tucker wanting a shoulder ride. I told hubby about that because he was sitting right here and he was laughing as much as I was lol.February 2, 2014 – 9:24 pmReplyCancel

  • May - Love this whole concept. What a stupid waste of time and money that whole celeb fashion scene is. I will take the Colorado tee any day of the week!February 3, 2014 – 1:41 amReplyCancel

  • Julia/ Frantic Mama - I loved participating in this link-up. You are so hilarious.February 6, 2014 – 10:42 amReplyCancel

  • Courtney Conover - Hi, Kristi!!! Fabulous post, as always! (I’m commenting so late that I hope you even see this.) I’m sorry, I’m still playing catch-up with my reading after the newer blog robbed me of most of my reading time. Oh, and I’m wearing pink plaid PJ pants from Target (circa 2010…does that make them vintage?), my new(er) fleece robe with cute little sheep all over them, and — I’ve saved the best for last, here — a tank top with breast milk stains on them, courtesy of my baby girl, which truly makes this piece a one-of-a-kind original. 😉February 7, 2014 – 9:36 pmReplyCancel

  • Susie (The Esthetic Goddess) - OMG! Kristi, this is hilarious! Love your speech! Penis on the neck is so last year!March 4, 2014 – 8:40 amReplyCancel

Your email is never published or shared. Required fields are marked *

*

*

N e v e r   m i s s   a   n e w   p o s t !